[quote]Professor X wrote:
How do you ask the patient you are treating if she would like to come by your house later?..without sounding like you do this to every patient you treat who looks cute?..and without sounding like you are unprofessional?
I am sure this can relate to all careers in some way…so how do you interact with the opposite sex in the one place where you aren’t supposed to?
[/quote]
Don’t shit where you sleep. Don’t fish off the company pier. Plenty of other places to have fun.
[quote]kingbeef323 wrote:
[quote]lewhitehurst wrote:
[quote]DoubleDuce wrote:
I hadn’t read this, and it doesn’t really apply to me (I’m now both married and an engineer where I rarely am in contact with women) But it would be really smooth to recommend a different dentist. When they as why, tell them its because you won’t ask out your own patients.[/quote]
That IS pretty damn smooth.
[/quote]
x2. Or you could just follow my motto. “When in doubt, pull it out!”[/quote]
I’m changing my avi - Two bald black guys with back pics. Reminds me of the movie grownups when Chris Rock is arguing with the other black guy from Sat Night Live.
Something like - Hey, I’m the black guy in this town. You need to get out of here and go find your own white people to scare. lol
Thanks for the bump, this seems like a good topic for me to read, as I don’t tend to go around bars and clubs either (since I’m technically still a student that apparently makes me weird) and I meet most people at uni, gym and work. Will read this as soon as I’m done writing for today.
B.
[quote]Professor X wrote:
[quote]Hallowed wrote:
So PROFX… Did you end up employing any of the suggested tactics?
If so, what results?
Especially interested to hear outcome of whipped cream approach (pics helpful)[/quote]
I tend to play it very safe at work…which sucks. I feel like I can’t be myself or even act like a “guy” when at work because you never know what might cause someone to act like they were assaulted or something.
In fact, I could even expand this outside of work and discuss how women want to be approached.
For instance, I often overthink my responses when speaking to an attractive woman for the first time. I do that because most women assume I am the exact opposite in personality than I really am based on appearance.
What do you people want from us just so we can get those digits?[/quote]
FWIW I think you are right about the work thing. It would really have to be that one in a millino 10+ and for you I’d think you’d have to follow the upthread advise and completely end the professional relationship first.
As far as your Q: Really the main thing is to have a basic ability to read someone’s response/attraction. I’m sure that you possess this.
In a stranger approach setting… it is wise to be careful here. I would say distance engage meaning eye contact and smile, if you like the response you get approach and engage this is just introduce yourself & small talk, still like the response you’re getting just ask. If you’re halfway decent at reading reciprical attraction you’ll either get the number or find out she already has a boyfriend… in which case she still thinks you’re hot just can’t go further. The fact is that these stranger encounters where there just happens to be a 10 at the grocery store you’ve got to grab that opportunity because once its gone its gone. If its a rejection who cares there would have been no connect without the approach anyways.
This is the reason nightclubs are such a popular pick up setting. You can engage and then spend some time in the other persons company before escalating to getting a number or making a future date. I don’t go out to clubs either and know this is the missing piece in alot of my social interaction.
I understand that there could be complications from your rather, um, intimidating appearance however I think a smile and the right approach will mitigate that. I mean lets face it a woman that is attracted to you LOVED THE SHIT out of that look anyways so its either going to be what she’s after or not. But you, ProfX should specifically be sure that you are smiling alot, and ALWAYS when speaking to a woman you are just meeting.
[quote]Hallowed wrote:
[quote]Professor X wrote:
[quote]Hallowed wrote:
So PROFX… Did you end up employing any of the suggested tactics?
If so, what results?
Especially interested to hear outcome of whipped cream approach (pics helpful)[/quote]
I tend to play it very safe at work…which sucks. I feel like I can’t be myself or even act like a “guy” when at work because you never know what might cause someone to act like they were assaulted or something.
In fact, I could even expand this outside of work and discuss how women want to be approached.
For instance, I often overthink my responses when speaking to an attractive woman for the first time. I do that because most women assume I am the exact opposite in personality than I really am based on appearance.
What do you people want from us just so we can get those digits?[/quote]
FWIW I think you are right about the work thing. It would really have to be that one in a millino 10+ and for you I’d think you’d have to follow the upthread advise and completely end the professional relationship first.
As far as your Q: Really the main thing is to have a basic ability to read someone’s response/attraction. I’m sure that you possess this.
In a stranger approach setting… it is wise to be careful here. I would say distance engage meaning eye contact and smile, if you like the response you get approach and engage this is just introduce yourself & small talk, still like the response you’re getting just ask. If you’re halfway decent at reading reciprical attraction you’ll either get the number or find out she already has a boyfriend… in which case she still thinks you’re hot just can’t go further. The fact is that these stranger encounters where there just happens to be a 10 at the grocery store you’ve got to grab that opportunity because once its gone its gone. If its a rejection who cares there would have been no connect without the approach anyways.
This is the reason nightclubs are such a popular pick up setting. You can engage and then spend some time in the other persons company before escalating to getting a number or making a future date. I don’t go out to clubs either and know this is the missing piece in alot of my social interaction.
I understand that there could be complications from your rather, um, intimidating appearance however I think a smile and the right approach will mitigate that. I mean lets face it a woman that is attracted to you LOVED THE SHIT out of that look anyways so its either going to be what she’s after or not. But you, ProfX should specifically be sure that you are smiling alot, and ALWAYS when speaking to a woman you are just meeting.
[/quote]
I never smile enough. I am trying lately, but I still fuck up a lot by not smiling. I honestly had no clue until I was out of college that women put so much damn importance on a smile. I get the looks, but then they act scared…or, like in the case at some grocery stores, I will be in a hurry because I have shit to do so I don’t flirt with her at all.
The FLIRT thing is what I need to work on. I have friends who do this so naturally that they could talk a woman into bed in spite of them not having a job, a car, or custody of their own kids.
I need “flirt” lessons…you know, so it’s not overboard or obvious.
I never disclose what I do for a living when meeting them outside. In fact, the one time I did, she didn’t believe me and thought I was lying. (my frat brothers had been telling them they were pro football players so maybe I got screwed that way)
Anywhoo…smile more. Check.
Don’t shit where you eat.
I like the suggestion about recommending another dentist if you are going to go for it with a patient. Sexual harrassment suits are out of hand, so you have to be ultra-cautious.[/quote]
Good advice. It’s not worth jeopardizing your cash flow. You have to find another high traffic area where women you would like to meet frequent. How about the gym? Can’t think of a better place.
The first thing is to NOT ask her to your house. That’s a little too forward and comes off kinda creepy. Just get her number and tell her you’ll give her a shout later in the week. I work in a gym so I guess it’s different but it’s always worked for me.
[quote]dnlcdstn wrote:
Don’t shit where you eat.
I like the suggestion about recommending another dentist if you are going to go for it with a patient. Sexual harrassment suits are out of hand, so you have to be ultra-cautious.[/quote]
Good advice. It’s not worth jeopardizing your cash flow. You have to find another high traffic area where women you would like to meet frequent. How about the gym? Can’t think of a better place.
[/quote]
I usually train too late for that. Sometimes, I don’t hit the gym until 12am or later. Much less produce to choose from at that time.
I may go train right after work today just to see what’s out there.
[quote]Professor X wrote:
[quote]dnlcdstn wrote:
Don’t shit where you eat.
I like the suggestion about recommending another dentist if you are going to go for it with a patient. Sexual harrassment suits are out of hand, so you have to be ultra-cautious.[/quote]
Good advice. It’s not worth jeopardizing your cash flow. You have to find another high traffic area where women you would like to meet frequent. How about the gym? Can’t think of a better place.
[/quote]
Damn, I thought I trained late (usually 8). Off topic, how do you go about nutrition when training this late? You don’t have a huge meal post w.o. do you?
I usually train too late for that. Sometimes, I don’t hit the gym until 12am or later. Much less produce to choose from at that time.
I may go train right after work today just to see what’s out there.[/quote]
[quote]Hallowed wrote:
But you, ProfX should specifically be sure that you are smiling alot, and ALWAYS when speaking to a woman you are just meeting.
[/quote]
Also say something nerdy like “Greetings and salutations!”
That would put me at ease.
Try it out out-loud. Impossible to say it mean.
[quote]dnlcdstn wrote:
Damn, I thought I trained late (usually 8). Off topic, how do you go about nutrition when training this late? You don’t have a huge meal post w.o. do you?
[/quote]
When gaining, all of my meals are huge. Right now, I usually eat steak and potatoes. I no longer believe that your body somehow gains more fat at night simply because you ate at that time.
REMEMBER BITCHES LOVE SMILEY FACES
I’m not dating so I probably should keep my opinion to myself but I always enjoy when a guy argues with me 
(playfully of course)
It says:
But I love to argue generally with anyone so that might not apply to friendlier women 
It might even put off a lot of women, but if that’s the case she’s a pussy anyhow!
[quote]debraD wrote:
I’m not dating so I probably should keep my opinion to myself but I always enjoy when a guy argues with me (playfully of course)
It says:
But I love to argue generally with anyone so that might not apply to friendlier women It might even put off a lot of women, but if that’s the case she’s a pussy anyhow!
[/quote]
I can do arguing.
[quote]debraD wrote:
I’m not dating so I probably should keep my opinion to myself but I always enjoy when a guy argues with me (playfully of course)
It says:
But I love to argue generally with anyone so that might not apply to friendlier women It might even put off a lot of women, but if that’s the case she’s a pussy anyhow!
[/quote]
I disagree. Arguing can actually mean many other things for a guy. It also depends if he is using logical points or flat contradiction. That can really go a lot of ways.
[quote]DoubleDuce wrote:
[quote]debraD wrote:
I’m not dating so I probably should keep my opinion to myself but I always enjoy when a guy argues with me (playfully of course)
It says:
But I love to argue generally with anyone so that might not apply to friendlier women It might even put off a lot of women, but if that’s the case she’s a pussy anyhow!
[/quote]
I disagree. Arguing can actually mean many other things for a guy. It also depends if he is using logical points or flat contradiction. That can really go a lot of ways.[/quote]
You flirting with me?
[quote]debraD wrote:
[quote]DoubleDuce wrote:
[quote]debraD wrote:
I’m not dating so I probably should keep my opinion to myself but I always enjoy when a guy argues with me (playfully of course)
It says:
But I love to argue generally with anyone so that might not apply to friendlier women It might even put off a lot of women, but if that’s the case she’s a pussy anyhow!
[/quote]
I disagree. Arguing can actually mean many other things for a guy. It also depends if he is using logical points or flat contradiction. That can really go a lot of ways.[/quote]
You flirting with me?
[/quote]
I was trying to be stealthy about it.
[quote]Professor X wrote:
[quote]Hallowed wrote:
[quote]Professor X wrote:
[quote]Hallowed wrote:
So PROFX… Did you end up employing any of the suggested tactics?
If so, what results?
Especially interested to hear outcome of whipped cream approach (pics helpful)[/quote]
I tend to play it very safe at work…which sucks. I feel like I can’t be myself or even act like a “guy” when at work because you never know what might cause someone to act like they were assaulted or something.
In fact, I could even expand this outside of work and discuss how women want to be approached.
For instance, I often overthink my responses when speaking to an attractive woman for the first time. I do that because most women assume I am the exact opposite in personality than I really am based on appearance.
What do you people want from us just so we can get those digits?[/quote]
FWIW I think you are right about the work thing. It would really have to be that one in a millino 10+ and for you I’d think you’d have to follow the upthread advise and completely end the professional relationship first.
As far as your Q: Really the main thing is to have a basic ability to read someone’s response/attraction. I’m sure that you possess this.
In a stranger approach setting… it is wise to be careful here. I would say distance engage meaning eye contact and smile, if you like the response you get approach and engage this is just introduce yourself & small talk, still like the response you’re getting just ask. If you’re halfway decent at reading reciprical attraction you’ll either get the number or find out she already has a boyfriend… in which case she still thinks you’re hot just can’t go further. The fact is that these stranger encounters where there just happens to be a 10 at the grocery store you’ve got to grab that opportunity because once its gone its gone. If its a rejection who cares there would have been no connect without the approach anyways.
This is the reason nightclubs are such a popular pick up setting. You can engage and then spend some time in the other persons company before escalating to getting a number or making a future date. I don’t go out to clubs either and know this is the missing piece in alot of my social interaction.
I understand that there could be complications from your rather, um, intimidating appearance however I think a smile and the right approach will mitigate that. I mean lets face it a woman that is attracted to you LOVED THE SHIT out of that look anyways so its either going to be what she’s after or not. But you, ProfX should specifically be sure that you are smiling alot, and ALWAYS when speaking to a woman you are just meeting.
[/quote]
I never smile enough. I am trying lately, but I still fuck up a lot by not smiling. I honestly had no clue until I was out of college that women put so much damn importance on a smile. I get the looks, but then they act scared…or, like in the case at some grocery stores, I will be in a hurry because I have shit to do so I don’t flirt with her at all.
The FLIRT thing is what I need to work on. I have friends who do this so naturally that they could talk a woman into bed in spite of them not having a job, a car, or custody of their own kids.
I need “flirt” lessons…you know, so it’s not overboard or obvious.
I never disclose what I do for a living when meeting them outside. In fact, the one time I did, she didn’t believe me and thought I was lying. (my frat brothers had been telling them they were pro football players so maybe I got screwed that way)
Anywhoo…smile more. Check.
[/quote]
Some people are just natural flirts. Its a gift.
Flirting is also something that improves greatly with practice.
Its easy for me to dish out the smile advice because I look like a fucking bitch if I don’t smile. Its the dark hair and light eyes… and maybe the eyebrows. If I’m not actively smiling others think I’m pissed off about something. I’ve experienced this in the workplace numerous times and seriously ACTIVELY SMILE to avoid giving this impression.
[quote]jdrannin1 wrote:
I could never trust a client/insured’s sencerity if they flirted with me. But, I’ve never hesitated to flirt back a little (not to the point where I could get in trouble) and I just leave it in their court.
I had one client ask that I call her when her claim was settled. It took everything in me to not call her. She was absolutely stunning. Made my heart beat through my chest. But, I just couldn’t do it. Too risky in my profession. It’s grounds for firing in my industry.
To X, is it something that could get you fired? I dont see it being unehtical so I say you go for it. Keep it under wraps so your colleagues dont think you are unprofessional and just dont make a habit out of it.[/quote]
I met and dated a gorgeous plaintiff attorney. I just had the claim reassigned. X is in a tough spot but if it ever advances, it begins with her no longer being his patient…hence no conflict, no appearance of impropriety and no doctor/patient relationship.
