Procrastinator's Anonymous

Hi, my name is Waylander and I’m a Procrastinator.

Haha. Ok, I really need to break this habit. I am fucking everything up, relationships, grades, whatever, because I procrastinate and seem to be generally apathetic, and it pisses me off. I never used to be this way either. For several years I went to a very advanced school, one which you had to be IQ tested and have some weird ass social aptitude test, and score well in both to even enter the school.

I thrived in this environment and did very well, but after 4 years my family had to move to another state for my dad’s job. I was put into just a regular school and I was so far ahead that I literally had to do absolutely nothing for the next 3 years of school and still made 4.0’s.

However, once I got to the end of high school and into college where I actually had to apply myself, it seemed impossible to make myself do so after this period of doing jack shit. I have moments where the switch just seems to flip and I get super motivated and get tons of things done, but I can’t stay that way for long.

Any suggestions on how to flip the switch on this permanently? I miss being the highly motivated individual I once was and other than the obvious “just fucking do it”, I’m hoping to hear something helpful from others who have broken out of a rut like this.

i have nothing to add here seeing as im just as bad as you on that note. just gonna see where this one goes.

Man, for me, it’s all about what you have to do versus what you should do.

Do the things that you HAVE to, and then address the things you should do. I find once the ball gets rolling, it’s much easier to accomplish whatever else I need to.

That, or I use other people as reasons to get my shit together. I think, Well, I don’t feel like doing this homework. Then I think about the foreign exchange students from, I don’t know, Zimbabwe or something, who feel like they have the greatest opportunity in the world being in our education system, and would otherwise be in the African militia or something.

It’s moments like those that I realize how American I really am sometimes.

That usually gets my ass up and going.

yeah man, i used to be in that exact same situation, let me give you some tips…

…tomrrow

I read the rest of the thread later…

Based on the first line that I did read, I’m the same way. I’m married and make good money. All is not lost.

It is like eating Wendy’s while gaining, just don’t be a fucking retard and live off it, and you’ll be fine.

I actually find my years of putting shit off until the last min helps me deal with deadlines. I don’t panic, I can’t panic anymore.

Reading this thread instead of finishing my paper, very productive.

I’m pretty bad at procrastinating as well. My problem is that I let assignments psych me out, but I still never get them done until the last minute. It ends up compromising my personal life because while I can’t justify going out and having fun if I have assignments hanging over my head, I still end up getting distracted and wasting time at the library when I could be finishing shit up. Its tough with school because there’s no monetary reward attached and if I screw up, the only person I’m hurting is me. When I’m at work its different because I’m being paid to do shit and I want to earn that money.

The way I’ve dealt with it is by figuring out when I’m at my best: when I have major work due I’ll stay up and do it late at night when no one is in the library and there is no one to talk to online. If that means working on the weekends when I can come home at 5 am and sleep till 10 or noon and then get back to it, then so be it. What I’ve found about myself is that I can really dial in and get shit done overnight.

A big part of the problem I have with school is that it doesn’t seem to matter sometimes. My schoolwork, while it may teach me things, doesn’t really contribute anything to the world and in my opinion isn’t really that significant. I have a hard time staying motivated when what I want to be doing right now is busting my ass in a career rather than in grad school, but I’ll be done in a few months.

My best advice for you would be to keep staying on top of it. If you find yourself doing a lot of all nighters or busting your work out all at once, make a conscious effort to do it earlier than your deadline. I’ve found that if I spend all night working on a paper a few days before the due date, I have time to iron out the shitty parts and I’m less likely to hand something in that is either late, subpar, or both.

I like SSC’s point about using other people as motivation, but in my case I focus on people I know who have been successful, sometimes even fictional people. I realize that they didn’t get to where they are by playing Whiteboard Tower Defense when they could have been working. That often gets me back on track.

I’ll see where this thread goes as I am the same way.

My “advice” as a fellow procrastinator trying to snap out of it, and hopefully this time succeeding, is to find a motivation. Someone/something that really lights you up. You said you used to be very motivated, I’m gonna go zen like here and tell you to go back to that happy place and find out why you were so motivated.

To me, D-day is AGAIN tomorrow. 30 weeks of pure hard work because I’m planning to be on vacation back HOME in the Philippines by July. That’s my motivation, on top of ALOT more things. Hope this helps and again, I would like to see what happens to this thread.

I was like that for a long time in college, it eventually changed and I started taking care of the stuff that was important to me (busting ass in school, lining up the right internships, etc) and I’m busier than I’ve ever been but also more proud of myself than I’ve ever been.

Not really any advice I can give you on how to flip your switch, mine happened after a break up forced me to re-evaluate my plans (which were at the time to go to grad school near her hundreds of miles away from where I live now), I entered tunnel vision for what I wanted to do and haven’t looked back since.

In all actuality the going to grad school thing was, in essence, procrastination as well.

It helps if the stuff you’re doing really fascinates you. I can’t imagine studying anything other than human biology.

Don’t know if that’ll help but it’s a similar situation and outcome from my perspective.

No one is going to give you the magical advice you want to here. We all react, feel, and think differently and just like training, there is no cookie cutter mold. School is a money scam anyways, most of the garbage they teach isn’t usable in the real world. Procrastination, IMO is the only way i manage to stay sane in this draining social structure. If i were to do my work on time, all the time, then id have no time for myself, no time to think, no time to be creative and think outside the box. IF you arent failing, why bother stressing yourself out about such an insignificant part of your life. (i assume you arent relyin on grades for scholarships or internships, otherwise there lies your motivation).

Life is a long race, if you try and sprint from the very beginning, you will burn out, die and be spit on by all the other runners. You must set an acceptable pace which allows you to “pass” those in the upper echelon when you see the finish line, your motivation/passion. If you knew that you were going to win the race in the end, would you give a fuck what place you were in during the race? uhhh fuck no. Procrastination is a pain in the ass for some, but for those who know how to use it, its a wonderful tool. Just dont let the time it gives you go to waste, be creative, enjoy yourself, and train your mothafuckin ballz off. Your switch will flip when you find something that is important enough to you. School is a means to an end, more than likely it’s not your passion or something you thoroughly enjoy.
Remember:
“if you only have a minute, it only takes a minute to do”
and
“the sooner you fall behind, the longer you have to catch up”

Just my opinion!

Valor

I can definitely relate to breezing through highschool and not liking having to deal wit actually exerting myself for schoolwork

[quote]HolyMacaroni wrote:
yeah man, i used to be in that exact same situation, let me give you some tips…

…tomrrow[/quote]

LOL

Waylander, join the Army, but just kidding

[quote]Hellfrost wrote:
Reading this thread instead of finishing my paper, very productive.[/quote]

I hear ya. I’m reading this thread instead of studying for a nutrition exam. I’ll post more later, gotta study.

Man, I am the definition of bullshitter. I have let damn near everything that would’ve been positive progress go by the wayside because I didn’t feel like working for it. School [HS dropout in the 9th grade], basketball [multiple juco and D-2 basketball ops], relationships [why is she leaving? Oh yeah, I acted like I didn’t give a fuck, or I left 'cause I didn’t give a fuck], you name it. Now I’m 27, I’m in school [that I have to pay for when it woulda been free a few years ago], I work as a personal trainer and I literally have no clue what I wanna do with my life. And you know what? All of that is my fault. It’s not 'cause my dad was an asshole or my mom coddled me too much, or that I had some life altering experience as a kid that made me apathetic. It’s 'cause I’m fucking lazy and I don’t like conforming to other peoples “rules”. The facts are that unless you invent something like silent velcro you’re gonna have to conform to others. The world doesn’t revolve around you, you live in it.

I don’t know how old you are Waylander, but I think you’re in your early 20’s. Do whatever you can to right the ship 'cause you DO NOT want to wake up at damn near 30 wondering what the fuck you’re gonna do. Find something that captures your interest and run with it. Like lifting? Get a kin degree. Like cooking? Become a chef, they bank. Like RC cars? Get a loan and open a hobby shop. It really doesn’t matter, just find something and stick with it, whatever the fuck it is. But, whatever you find make sure you’re passionate about it. The only thing worse than bullshitting through life is settling.

Good stuff guys, I’m enjoying reading these responses.

And HolyMac, the one thing I didn’t procrastinate on was showing your teacher hookup the link to your thread. I took care of that as soon as I thought of it. :slight_smile:

[quote]WhiteFlash wrote:

I don’t know how old you are Waylander, but I think you’re in your early 20’s. Do whatever you can to right the ship 'cause you DO NOT want to wake up at damn near 30 wondering what the fuck you’re gonna do. Find something that captures your interest and run with it. Like lifting? Get a kin degree. Like cooking? Become a chef, they bank. Like RC cars? Get a loan and open a hobby shop. It really doesn’t matter, just find something and stick with it, whatever the fuck it is. But, whatever you find make sure you’re passionate about it. The only thing worse than bullshitting through life is settling.[/quote]

I think this is one of the wisest things ever said on this site. Waylander you should take it to heart, because that is what I’m doing. I’m getting an undergrad in Kinesiology right now and I always have those moments of, should I do this instead, but what about that, and that and that? The truth is we can’t do fucking EVERYTHING! You gotta zero in on the passion for what you want and like, and go for it and don’t let anything hold you back. Regardless of whether or not you are 100% sure if it is the right decision, it’s better to go after it instead of wondering 10 years later what the fuck you’re gonna do with your life.

[quote]PB Andy wrote:
WhiteFlash wrote:

I don’t know how old you are Waylander, but I think you’re in your early 20’s. Do whatever you can to right the ship 'cause you DO NOT want to wake up at damn near 30 wondering what the fuck you’re gonna do. Find something that captures your interest and run with it. Like lifting? Get a kin degree. Like cooking? Become a chef, they bank. Like RC cars? Get a loan and open a hobby shop. It really doesn’t matter, just find something and stick with it, whatever the fuck it is. But, whatever you find make sure you’re passionate about it. The only thing worse than bullshitting through life is settling.

I think this is one of the wisest things ever said on this site. Waylander you should take it to heart, because that is what I’m doing. I’m getting an undergrad in Kinesiology right now and I always have those moments of, should I do this instead, but what about that, and that and that? The truth is we can’t do fucking EVERYTHING! You gotta zero in on the passion for what you want and like, and go for it and don’t let anything hold you back. Regardless of whether or not you are 100% sure if it is the right decision, it’s better to go after it instead of wondering 10 years later what the fuck you’re gonna do with your life.[/quote]

Yah, I’m doing exercise science right now. Not really any other reason except that I enjoy training and this major is part of that.

It’s just finding that career goal and honing in on it that’s a real bitch. When you are just kind of going with the flow, shit sucks. I mean life is fun but every night I go to bed thinking “What the fuck am I going to do with myself?”

[quote]WhiteFlash wrote:
Man, I am the definition of bullshitter. I have let damn near everything that would’ve been positive progress go by the wayside because I didn’t feel like working for it. School [HS dropout in the 9th grade], basketball [multiple juco and D-2 basketball ops], relationships [why is she leaving? Oh yeah, I acted like I didn’t give a fuck, or I left 'cause I didn’t give a fuck], you name it. Now I’m 27, I’m in school [that I have to pay for when it woulda been free a few years ago], I work as a personal trainer and I literally have no clue what I wanna do with my life. And you know what? All of that is my fault. It’s not 'cause my dad was an asshole or my mom coddled me too much, or that I had some life altering experience as a kid that made me apathetic. It’s 'cause I’m fucking lazy and I don’t like conforming to other peoples “rules”. The facts are that unless you invent something like silent velcro you’re gonna have to conform to others. The world doesn’t revolve around you, you live in it.

I don’t know how old you are Waylander, but I think you’re in your early 20’s. Do whatever you can to right the ship 'cause you DO NOT want to wake up at damn near 30 wondering what the fuck you’re gonna do. Find something that captures your interest and run with it. Like lifting? Get a kin degree. Like cooking? Become a chef, they bank. Like RC cars? Get a loan and open a hobby shop. It really doesn’t matter, just find something and stick with it, whatever the fuck it is. But, whatever you find make sure you’re passionate about it. The only thing worse than bullshitting through life is settling.[/quote]

Agreed. Most of the people I know who were like that in their early 20’s are now hitting their late 20’s to early 30’s working deadend jobs they don’t like. I screwed around in high school until about the 11th grade. I quit that in college for one reason…the only thing I was really afraid of was complete failure.

I think if you truly understood how hard it is in the real world without a very decent education and a decent income better than most, you would quit fucking around so much.

You are into bodybuilding and hoping to hit near or over 300lbs. Where do you think the money to continue doing that will come from once you start working? If you basically make anything much less than 50k a year (and that is cutting it close) you can kiss all of those pounds of steak goodbye because responsibilities will hit pretty fucking quick…especially if you have kids.

No one can give you motivation…which means you need to find out what will push you to do more, whether that be fear, anger or passion.

one thing is for sure though…time is running out because hitting your 30’s and still being that lost doesn’t seem to work out too well for most people.

[quote]WhiteFlash wrote:
Man, I am the definition of bullshitter. I have let damn near everything that would’ve been positive progress go by the wayside because I didn’t feel like working for it. School [HS dropout in the 9th grade], basketball [multiple juco and D-2 basketball ops], relationships [why is she leaving? Oh yeah, I acted like I didn’t give a fuck, or I left 'cause I didn’t give a fuck], you name it. Now I’m 27, I’m in school [that I have to pay for when it woulda been free a few years ago], I work as a personal trainer and I literally have no clue what I wanna do with my life. And you know what? All of that is my fault. It’s not 'cause my dad was an asshole or my mom coddled me too much, or that I had some life altering experience as a kid that made me apathetic. It’s 'cause I’m fucking lazy and I don’t like conforming to other peoples “rules”. The facts are that unless you invent something like silent velcro you’re gonna have to conform to others. The world doesn’t revolve around you, you live in it.

I don’t know how old you are Waylander, but I think you’re in your early 20’s. Do whatever you can to right the ship 'cause you DO NOT want to wake up at damn near 30 wondering what the fuck you’re gonna do. Find something that captures your interest and run with it. Like lifting? Get a kin degree. Like cooking? Become a chef, they bank. Like RC cars? Get a loan and open a hobby shop. It really doesn’t matter, just find something and stick with it, whatever the fuck it is. But, whatever you find make sure you’re passionate about it. The only thing worse than bullshitting through life is settling.[/quote]

Bad ass post!

I like to ask myself: “If I were an employer, would I hire ME amongst 100 other students applying for the same position/internship?”

“If I were a professor, would I budge MY grade 0.5 percentage points because I felt the student really cared by coming to my office hours and showing an exceptional enthusiasm in my lecture?”

“If I were a chick, would I date ME? Do I have my shit together?”

I’ve realized that a LOT of what I would have called procrastination a few years ago is a combination of anxiety and obsessive compulsiveness.

For instance, if I refresh this web site 97 mother fucking times because I DON’T want to write a paper, my anxiety has kicked in because the paper is due the next morning (and is 15 pages and I am kidding myself by thinking I’m some badass novelist who’ll churn out a polished paper in 6 hours) and my obsessive compulsiveness has found a new “outlet” for my anxiety: this web site.

That’s what I think procrastination is, a combination of anxiety and obsessive compulsiveness AND a severe underestimation of the time required to deliver a QUALITY product. Think about that: say you need one night to churn out a 15 page paper but is it quality? You are not awarded on effort, you are awarded on QUALITY of finished product. Nobody says, “Waylander! You wrote 15 pages in 3 hours? You deserve an A+”

A paper might take a few days to research the topic, another day or two to really get the juices flowing, then a day to do an outline and edit it, another day or two to write it, then another 2-3 days to edit, re-read and edit again. THAT is a quality product, something that has gone through honest QUALITY CONTROL and not bullshit control.

I’ll take a due date for a future project/paper/quiz, estimate how much time I need for each phase, block off each phase on my Google Calendar and keep track of it. So long as I have completed work that is relevant to the current phase according to the calendar, then I am on track and I will NOT have regrets about abusing my time.

Really, what you need to understand is that your TIME is a resource that is forever fleeting and that YOU are the only person in charge of that resource. Do you hate when people waste your time? If so, why do YOU waste your own time?

If people find out how much time you waste, how will you ever convince them that your time is valuable? How will you EARN their respect FOR your time? You won’t unless you take your own time seriously.

Just about everything you do should have a return on investment. Do you want to be 28 years old and still hitting clubs, waiting in some stupid ass line with a bunch of idiots, or do you want to at least have your own place where you and friends can chill until ANY hour you want (because fuck that “last call” bullshit) and you can always retreat to?

If you dated a chick at 28 (arbitrary) that still lived with her parents and worked at the front desk somewhere instead of having a true career path, would you take her seriously, as a potential long term mate? Or would you worry about having to support her and paying her student loans and shopping habits?

Do you want to afford healthcare one day for yourself, like a good PPO plan so that you can see a specialist that YOU researched (say, an endocrinologist or a good ART practitioner you learned about here), or do you want to be stuck with a crappy HMO and be at the mercy of imbecile doctors?

Do you want to set aside money every month for a trip fund, emergency fund and retirement fund? Do you think you will never be unemployed and stuck with the SAME bills as before (i.e., bill you can’t afford on unemployment, requiring you to pay them down from another source of income - savings).

Anecdotally, you can fuck up and goof off until just before 30 years of age, and society will GENERALLY forgive you for it as part of the “ignorance of youth.” Once you get up there in age, you need to have your shit together, if not for others to take you seriously than to at least be able to feed yourself.

Definitely pursue something quickly; people will care more (and respect you more) if you had an idea and pursued it than if you have 1000 ideas that sound grand but never get any of them off the ground. You see a ton of these folks in business school, folks that think throwing out famous names and strategies and vernacular make them SOUND busy when they are really just spinning their gears getting nowhere.

People care that you shoot to kill. Have a great idea that is honestly legit? Run with it, then talk about your success/failure and people will listen, even people with equal or more experience, which will end up facilitating an exchange of wisdom and possibly some quality NETWORKING that may hook you up with a job or someone important.

I love when people talk about NOT caring about money. Money should NOT be a motivating factor but money IS important; you want the decent neighborhood for you and your girlfriend or eventual family to live in, so your kids can go to a decent school or so you are close enough to everything that commuting to work/entertainment/daily necessities won’t drive you nuts (like far away in the suburbs if that’s not your thing). You want to pay off those student loans while still affording rent, gas, and a vacation here and there. Just examples but all realistic and common scenarios.

Translation: if you START something, make sure it is worthwhile but for God’s sake, FINISH.

And don’t forget that the more money you have, the easier it is to make money, generally speaking.


The above was not meant to be absolutely cohesive but just any piece of advice I could think of. The most important thing about serious “life” decisions:

It is easier than you think. The fact that most people don’t make the right choices or never follow through does NOT mean making something of yourself is DIFFICULT, it just means that that many people seriously overcomplicate it, psyche themselves out and end up blaming some arbitrary emotional ailment like ADD or procrastination.

You’re not very T if you’re still renting a room into your late 30s, don’t have a career and never finished your education but bench 500 lbs, squat 600 and DL 800 and have 8% bodyfat and never miss a meal…

Dig?