Physicality,
You have already received some fantastic advice in this thread. Pay special attention to what FightinIrish wrote.
These some other threads that you may want to read, as they deal with elements of this subject.
Krav Maga centered:
http://tnation.T-Nation.com/free_online_forum/sports_boxing_fighting_mma_combat/krav_maga_5?id=4728549&pageNo=0
Roundhead’s Grappling for self defense/Boxing or grappling vs reality martial arts
http://tnation.T-Nation.com/free_online_forum/sports_boxing_fighting_mma_combat/grappling_for_self_defence?id=4638321&pageNo=0
Bit of a train wreck in the OP but FighinIrish and Sentoguy make some fantastic points RE self defense
Several Notes:
1.) I tell people to find something reasonably applicable, that they enjoy doing. This stuff is a physical skill and requires practice. Putting in the weeks to months to years of training in order to get the most benefit is much easier if you are doing something you enjoy. I have written about this before.
2.) If actual “self defense” aka defense against criminal violence is your goal than weapons training is fantastic. Firearms were invented for a reason. If that is not your interest, that is fine to.
3.) Most of the game in self defense happens before contact is made. Half the game may be simply keeping aware of what is going on around you, another quarter is probably acting on this knowledge in a timely fashion. This transcends styles/schools. I whole heartily recommend Jeff Cooper’s PRINCIPLES OF PERSONAL DEFENSE as an intro to the mind set. Although Cooper is thought of as a gun guy this book transcends weapons/platforms and in my opinion should be required reading for any person regardless of gender or philosophy before they reach adulthood. It is brief. It is cheap. It is that good.
http://www.paladin-press.com/product/Principles_of_Personal_Defense/Other_Combat_Shooting
4.) On bigger/stronger males: It is true that size and strength always matter, but so does technique and spirit. The purpose of martial arts, at least as I explain them, is to deal with problems you could not otherwise deal with by using technique. Saying that you will never be able to survive against a man who is 60+ pounds heavier than you is as incorrect as saying size does not matter. If your technique is good enough(read significantly better than his), and you are willing to sell your life dearly, than there are a great many things you can accomplish. If this is truly about self defense than the goal is not to best someone who was deemed even enough to you in capability that it makes a contest (like in a sport), but to be far more trouble than you are worth to anyone that would attack you.
Jeff Cooper wrote “One bleeding-heart type asked me in a recent interview if I did not agree that ‘violence begets violence.’ I told him that it is my earnest endeavor to see that it does. I would like very much to ensure â?? and in some cases I have â?? that any man who offers violence to his fellow citizen begets a whole lot more in return than he can enjoy.”)
Regards,
Robert A