1 push press (power clean first rep)
4 x 8 @ 87,5 kg (beltless)
Quads were so fatigued that these weren’t snappy and my quads were burning.
2a db bench press
4 x 8 @ 36 kg
2b db row
4 x 8 @ 36 kg
3 face pulls
4 x 12
4 curls and triceps with a light terra band not programmed
1 x 100 each arm and movement
Notes:
fuck my right elbow hurts! Damn you tennis. Everything was okay during the barbell press but the dumbbell was painful. Anyone got any tips how I can treat this (beside just rest) and how I can maybe make the transition into a little additional tennis easier for my body?
That’s gonna be a no for me because I can’t fully supinate my arms. If I force them both in a supinated position by grabbing an axle for example, my forearms feel like they’re gonna burst. So I’d have to settled for an ez bar for those
I feel you man. My wrist mobility is pretty messed up from my brief stint with Brazilian jujitsu. Different ailment, but pretty much the same result. Slap some fat gripz on that easy bar for a similar effect!
Today was not a good day. There is big BUT though and I am going to explain that in the next post.
However there are things going on that might not be related to the depression entirely but maybe the meds or the thyroid disfunction, I don’t know. However I am not only depleated but legit extremely tired most days. Today was an extreme. I could barely keep my eyes open, no amount of caffeine had any effect whatsoever (I am talking an espresso shots in my coffees) and I felt so tired that it made me feel sick. Still went to train. I honestly can’t say if that was the right thing or maybe today would have been the rare occasion to better sit a day out (since deadlifts nearly made me puke). Talked to one of my best friends about it (the one whom I travelled with and am doing all those activities with atm - can’t be thankful enough for him) and he was really impressed that I would still do the session. He asked how I did it and that kinda made me think because I have honestly no idea. It is not that training is that fun to me, it isn’t, but the discipline to just go and do it is so deeply ingrained in me that I just do it no matter what and never really stop to think. Weird realization but wanted to type it down here.
1 snatch grip deadlifts (beltless)
4 x 8 @ 127,5 kg
2 leg curls
4 x 8 @ 100 kg
3 sandbag carry
3 x 1 meter @ 100 kg
Didn’t set up something to load the bag over, just treated it as pick up and extension practise.
Notes:
I hate snatch grip deadlifts. Even more than elevated pulls. Curious to see what it does for my deadlift though and also what @t3hpwnisher makes of them as a max effort movement. I guess a lot will depend on how much you are going to brute force it or how ‘technically true’ to the movement you are going to stay. One thing I personally dislike in particular is the way the bar grinds up against my junk at lockout. I like barbells but there are limits…
will push the bench workout to Saturday because I want to play tennis tomorrow and Not doing both in one day might help the elbow
I think it is time for a medical update.
One thing first: Things are generally looking up.
doctor’s and blood tests
I had multiple things done to check my body for side effects of the new drug. Apparently it can affect the heart so I had the usual EKG and blood pressure tests. EKG was fine and blood pressure was 120/80 as usual when I check it myself. Kinda proud of that considering I used to take blood pressure meds as a teenager and was told to stop lifting (sadly showing that doctors aren’t fully aware of what lifting does for your body). Now I am 123 kg and have an exemplary bp.
One thing I had to talk my doctor into (because it apparently cuts into his budget and he thought it wasn’t necessary) was a drug monitoring which basically shows how much of the medication is active in my blood and organism and how it’s metabolized. That is something that my former psychiatrist urged me to get because it helps to find the right dose for me. The results were - against what the doc thought beforehand - significant. The concentration of the drug itself is at the lower end but there was something other that was significant. The rate at which my body metabolizes the medicament. The explanation says: “<0.3 = poor metabolizer; >5.2 ultrafast metabolizer” and my result is 11.2 - so more than twice as fast as ultrafast? My doctor wasn’t really able to interpret what that exactly means for me. If I got it right it generally says that my body is metabolizing the substance at such a fast rate that it is difficult to hold a steady state in my blood. What that means going forward is to be decided by specialist who can make more sense of the lab results. I am trying to get my hands on an appointment but they have long waiting lists…
Speaking of long waiting lists and specialists: I have two appointments in possible day clinics coming up. One next week and the next the week after. I don’t want to get my hopes up after the last fiasco but it would be nice to know what to do from here.
State of mind/ emotions
As I said in the beginning: Things are looking up - slowly and not exactly steadily but the direction matters most.
The travelling with my buddy did me a world of good. I also think the medication is starting to do it’s work better.
I don’t feel good per se. Most people in my shoes would say they feel bad to terrible. I don’t say that to brag or because I think I am a tough guy - I just have a different frame of reference. I can compare to the new low that I got to know when I was basically finished and thought about ending it for good.
So I have developed a new point of view lately in which I compare how well I get through the day and how low the lows of each day are compared to that. That might seem like a low bar and in a way it is BUT it shows me how far I’ve come. There is no guarantee that this was the lowest it will get for me but again I can use it as a resource for the question: Why not give up? The answer is still and will be: I am Not done yet.
It was great reading this. Getting a result no matter what it is from a blood test means someone will interpret it and hopefully this will help with medication decisions going forward. The fact you can feel positive is a massive step forward and a really positive sign going forward.
Played tennis yesterday. Elbow hurt but not as much as last time. Trying out a different racket from a mate. It’s mainly my serves that aggrevate the joint. I have a lot of power doing them but not a lot of technique. However when I land them they rarely get returned.
1a Bench press (first two sets partly t&g, partly paused. Last two paused)
4 x 8 @ 80 kg
1b ng lat pull down
4 x 8 @ 70 kg
2a db shoulder press
4 x 10 @ 29 kg
Next jump ist going to be hard
2b lat pull down
4 x 10 @ 60 kg
3 db external rotation
3 x 12
Notes:
elbow hurt but not as bad as last week after tennis.
second workout was moving nearly all of my equipment upstairs (through the tiny self build staircase which was build in the elevator shaft). That shit was hard. Had an argument with the guy in charge at cheese factory. I don’t really get his point but he is in charge and I can’t risk falling out with him. So I am moving things upstairs.
Appointment in the clinic tomorrow got cancelled from their side. I don’t know when it’s due for a reschedule.
1 high bar squats
2 x 5 @ 132,5 kg (sleeves)
2 x 5 @ 132,5 kg (wraps)
2 yoke speed work
3 x 20 meter (turn at 10) @ 165 kg
3 yoke hold
2 x 10 sec @ 250 kg
4 behind the back barbell hold
3 x ca. 3 sec @ 155 kg - way too heavy.
I suspect the new powerlifting bar to be the problem actually because I have to lift the bar a few centimeters up and that gets the sleeves spinning and it rolls right out of my hands. Will have to decrease the weight because I can’t keep up with the planned progression.
Notes:
high bar squats are hard af for me. 132,5 kg was actually rather difficult.
Particularly bad day today. If I were to guess (yes I have that good of a handle on my own feelings), it might be connected to the cancelled appointment. It’s not that big of a deal, they will reschedule and I have another appointment next week in a different clinic. Still there was undoubtedly a bit of a build up that led nowhere.
I still left the house though, so that is something… Went training and will meet a good friend in Göttingen (since that appointment was set up 2 weeks ago).
Didn’t feel like training today (well more so than the other days) and mainly went through the motion. Didn’t feel better afterwards which I generally do most sessions. Also I apparently slept wrong and the right shoulder/ neck/pec/ bicep area is hurting a bit.
1 Push Press (beltless; no cleans going forward)
4 x 8 @ 92,5 kg
2a db bench press
4 x 8 @ 41,5 kg
2b DB row
4 x 8 @ 41,5 kg
The db presses were hard.
3 face pulls
4 x 12
Notes:
again not convinced by my push press performance. Weights like these need to fly.
the program is testing my patience and believe in the system a good bit. I am basically only handeling light loads or variations that make light loads feel hard, yet I am actually expected to do rep PRs with the comp lifts at very high % in only two weeks!
