"Whenever I want to impress a young lady and get her in the mood for some serious loving, I break out a cold, smooth 40 oz bottle of Colt .45 and make her chug that damn thing. Ten mimutes later shes ready for anything…mainly because she’s passed out cold.
So take it from Billy Dee. Colt .45, gets you some everytime."
And for the record, I prefer the unpretentious and subtle flavorings of Mickeys Malt Liquor, in the 12 oz widemouth or 20 oz Hornet, no doubt.
[quote]The3toedSloth wrote:
With 15 solid years of almost daily drinking to blackout stage, I suppose I have enough stories to last me a lifetime. Of course, a good portion of them have been told back to me, because of course I have no first hand recollection of them.
Probably, the one that stands out the most, was when I asked my mother’s friend to suck my cock. Now, I don’t remember asking her to suck my cock. I woke up the following morning, with that nagging feeling that I had done something that required an apology. So I phoned my mom, and acted quite nonchalant.
“Hi mom, what’s new?” “You don’t remember, do you?” “What did I do, and who do I apologize to?” “You were talking about sucking cock .” Well, I remembered who I was talking to, and I knew exactly what I must have said. So ya, I had to phone my mom’s friend and apologize. And no, she never did give me head.
I have to laugh at the stories, because they consumed a good portion of my life. But I don’t miss those days much at all, now. Sure, it’s not as exciting never knowing where you’ll wake up. But man, the constant hangovers, and the drinking to ‘cure’ the hangover, I am glad that’s all over.
|/ 3Toes
[/quote]
And this is a prime example of why you don’t drink with your mother.
Up in canada we got a 10% malt called Black Bull, it goes down as easy as colt and gets you pissed a lot faster, also in small amounts its great for going to sleep or relieving performance anxiety.
Your mom must’ve wanted to KILL you.
[quote]The3toedSloth wrote:
Probably, the one that stands out the most, was when I asked my mother’s friend to suck my cock. Now, I don’t remember asking her to suck my cock. I woke up the following morning, with that nagging feeling that I had done something that required an apology. So I phoned my mom, and acted quite nonchalant.
|/ 3Toes
[/quote]
[quote]snipeout wrote:
Chinadoll, are you on OAHU? It sounds like you were describing Moose’s with the wooden bar.[/quote]
Yes, I’m on Oahu…close, but not Moose’s…but kewl guess, I take it you’ve been stationed here, went to school here or used to live here???
[quote]Babalu wrote:
Malt Liquor = Best alcohol ever
[/quote]
For a long time I believed Patrone Silver held that title!!
[quote]Nomancer wrote:
lothario1132 wrote:
… After that, my friends pitched in and bought me a T-shirt with a picture on it that says “Hello, I’m: Drunk” like those hello name tags at convention centers.
Every once in a while, I pull that bad boy out and declare war on myself (or more specifically, my liver), and go make a fool out of myself. Some more.
The one of the best shirts that I’ve seen:
The liver is evil and must be punished.[/quote]
Available at “The Bull”, a bar/pub in Key West, Florida. Be sure to purchase a size up, they run a bit small.
[quote]chinadoll wrote:
snipeout wrote:
Chinadoll, are you on OAHU? It sounds like you were describing Moose’s with the wooden bar.
Yes, I’m on Oahu…close, but not Moose’s…but kewl guess, I take it you’ve been stationed here, went to school here or used to live here???
[/quote]
Stationed from 96-99. Did my 21st at mooses on dollar drink night.
[quote]chinadoll wrote:
Your mom must’ve wanted to KILL you.
[/quote]
Ya, I think she probably would have liked to kill me many times during my drinking career. I was quite an asshole. I thought I was quite the funny asshole though. hehe.
|/ 3Toes
Pop 4-5 charcoal caps. before you fall asleep & you’ll be feelin’ perfect in the morning!!! It’s like you never even drank! It’s quite amazing! Get a bottle @ your local health food store. AND, keep taking your milk thistle too!
Rocket Fuel…DAMN!!!
OMG, not to gross you out, but we give charcoal in the ER for overdoses! It makes the person make copious black diarrhea…the charcoal binds to everything in the GI tract, thereby making it unabsorbable, the load is hyperosmolar, and hence will move rapidly through the GI tract and ppffttt, diarrhea the whole thing out.
[quote]BRUCELEEWANNABE wrote:
Pop 4-5 charcoal caps. before you fall asleep & you’ll be feelin’ perfect in the morning!!! It’s like you never even drank! It’s quite amazing! Get a bottle @ your local health food store. AND, keep taking your milk thistle too![/quote]
[quote]chinadoll wrote:
OMG, not to gross you out, but we give charcoal in the ER for overdoses! It makes the person make copious black diarrhea…the charcoal binds to everything in the GI tract, thereby making it unabsorbable, the load is hyperosmolar, and hence will move rapidly through the GI tract and ppffttt, diarrhea the whole thing out.
[/quote]
Yeah, nice try, BRUCELEEWANNABE.
“Hey guys! Want to know how to get out of a hangover? Eat like three boxes of ex-lax! IT RAWKS!!!”
LOL Just f’n with ya.
[quote]chinadoll wrote:
OMG, not to gross you out, but we give charcoal in the ER for overdoses! It makes the person make copious black diarrhea…the charcoal binds to everything in the GI tract, thereby making it unabsorbable, the load is hyperosmolar, and hence will move rapidly through the GI tract and ppffttt, diarrhea the whole thing out.
BRUCELEEWANNABE wrote:
Pop 4-5 charcoal caps. before you fall asleep & you’ll be feelin’ perfect in the morning!!! It’s like you never even drank! It’s quite amazing! Get a bottle @ your local health food store. AND, keep taking your milk thistle too!
[/quote]
Really?!?!? That’s happened to me or my friends that take it. Maybe that’s what happens if you ingest alot. But hey, better than having a major HO!!!
[quote]BRUCELEEWANNABE wrote:
chinadoll wrote:
OMG, not to gross you out, but we give charcoal in the ER for overdoses! It makes the person make copious black diarrhea…the charcoal binds to everything in the GI tract, thereby making it unabsorbable, the load is hyperosmolar, and hence will move rapidly through the GI tract and ppffttt, diarrhea the whole thing out.
BRUCELEEWANNABE wrote:
Pop 4-5 charcoal caps. before you fall asleep & you’ll be feelin’ perfect in the morning!!! It’s like you never even drank! It’s quite amazing! Get a bottle @ your local health food store. AND, keep taking your milk thistle too!
Really?!?!? That’s happened to me or my friends that take it. Maybe that’s what happens if you ingest alot. But hey, better than having a major HO!!!
[/quote]
Diarrhea is acually dangerous, you can loose a fair ammount of micronutrients and water if your not careful.
I’d rather have the Hangover (which I hardly acually get).
quick Q. Does anybody else find that you can drink as much rum as you can buy without having a hangover.
Don’t know about rum, but Sky Vodka does not give a hangover. Stoli and Absolut will hurt you, but for some reason Sky won’t. Only thing I notice about rum is I get very mellow, almost acting like I’m stoned when I drink rum and coke.
Worst hangover I ever had pain wise was off of Hornsby’s Draft Cider and Goldschlager. It probably didn’t help I drank the whole fifth of Gold, as well as a six pack of cider.
8 pints of guiness on friday night, also came with a free row with the mrs
early saturday morning, up on the roof of my house repointing the brickwork, was a lovely experience…
[quote]legend wrote:
8 pints of guiness on friday night, also came with a free row with the mrs
early saturday morning, up on the roof of my house repointing the brickwork, was a lovely experience…[/quote]
What is it about Guiness that the lethal limit seesm to be 8 pints? Anything beyond that and you’re in trouble.
I did get brave one night in college and we decided to chase each pint of Guiness with a shot of Jamesons Irish Whiskey. Went through eight of each and woke up on the wrong side of the county, not sure how I got their.
I met my wife when she was in the Navy, stationed on the same ship as I was. In 97 0r 98(the years start to run together after awhile), our ship pulled into Chinhae, S. Korea for a liberty port visit. We did the tours and shopping thing a couple days, then decided to explore Chinhae itself one day.
After getting completely lost, and having an assault rifle pointed at us when we approached a South Korean base(still not sure why he did that), we hopped a cab and got back to the right base. We went straight to the base club to get drinks. Little did I know, her intentions were to get me as drunk as possible, and then f*ck the shit out of me.
The base club was designed for a max of 275 people. I know this because I saw the sign on the wall. Our ship had a crew of about 1500 at the time, so minus duty section, pretty much every one was at the club–meaning it was literally standing room only.
We got lucky as we made a lap of the bar, and jumped on two stools which were being vacated. I basically slid under some dude’s ass while he was still in the process of standing up. To which about ten other people started whining, and then wandered off.
Long story short(not really), I was drinking beer, maybe 8-10, and had a couple shots with my wife. She was drinking mixed drinks(plus shots), and had a total of about 8 drinks, plus probably 8 shots of Crown, and one of takillya. I remember, about the time I’m carrying a hard buzz, she said, ‘I’m starting to feel a little buzz now’, on drink 6 or so. I thought, Damn, this girl can DRINK!
Here’s the thing: I knew that moving around got the alcohol circulating quicker, so it didn’t sneak up on you, so I was walking around while she guarded our seats. After a while, I was drunk enough that I forgot why I was walking around, but kept doing it and didn’t tell her to. So she sat still(didn’t even go the restroom), through 8 drinks, and 9 shots.
We got up to leave and I’m thinking ‘Get her back to the ship’(Cinderella liberty, she was an E-3 and had to be on board before midnight). I’m almost in the parking lot and realize that she’s not behind me. I turn around, and she is being held up(physically) by Shore Patrol because she couldn’t stand up. All that liquor hit at once, and she about fell over.
So I get her on the bus, where she proceeds to puke on my seat(which I had recently vacated). This chief(the guy who bought her all the Crown) appears out of nowhere, swipes the seat clean with his bare hand, and sits down in what is left. We get her back to the ship, get her in her rack(and enlist some of her friends to keep an eye on her since I obviously can’t stay in female berthing).
Funny thing was, she went to bed drunk, woke up drunk, and wasn’t hungover until that night.
Sick thing was, I was leaving for a tour the next morning(she had to work, and she did it completely hammered), and saw that chief getting on another bus. Still wearing the exact same clothes he was wearing when he sat in my wife’s vomit.