I can’t believe I read through this whole thread. I haven’t heard this much shit talk since my boys left for college.
If you want to be hardcore, go with sandpaper and exfoliate your ass while you’re at it.
[quote]BCSteel wrote:
WTF, do you guys have colons the size of pencils? Is that why you have to shit 2-5x per day? I eat a lot of salad in with dinner, helps to keep things coming out quite well. One power dump in the morning, triple flush.[/quote]
The fact that you only shit once a day is the exact reason why you aren’t big.
Baby Whipes Fo Sho!
If your ass bleeds just put a plaster (band-aid) on it after you’re done.
Metamucil (or any fiber) should do the trick. If that doesn’t work, there’s always figging. Figging - Wikipedia
[quote]BCSteel wrote:
WTF, do you guys have colons the size of pencils? Is that why you have to shit 2-5x per day? I eat a lot of salad in with dinner, helps to keep things coming out quite well. One power dump in the morning, triple flush.[/quote]
Is this post serious? Please post pics of the body created by your clearly superior eating and shitting habits.
When all out trying to gain, I can go about 5 times a day or more depending on how much food I get down. My guess is, you can’t understand it because you are nowhere near that big.
What’s with the “I shit 2-5 times a day” nonsense? I can see fluctuating a little, but if you’re shitting twice one day and 5 times the next, you might want to regulate your eating habits.
And everyone on this site should be shitting at least 3 times a day, anyway.
[quote]BONEZ217 wrote:
BCSteel wrote:
WTF, do you guys have colons the size of pencils? Is that why you have to shit 2-5x per day? I eat a lot of salad in with dinner, helps to keep things coming out quite well. One power dump in the morning, triple flush.
The fact that you only shit once a day is the exact reason why you aren’t big. [/quote]
His stats list him at 6’3" and only 195lbs. I think the real question is why he hadn’t put the pieces together himself.
Let me guess…I bet he thinks he is a “hardgainer”.
[quote]LankyMofo wrote:
What’s with the “I shit 2-5 times a day” nonsense? I can see fluctuating a little, but if you’re shitting twice one day and 5 times the next, you might want to regulate your eating habits.
And everyone on this site should be shitting at least 3 times a day, anyway.[/quote]
LOL. I wouldn’t be able to eat anymore past maybe 2-4pm if I only took one dump a day. I spoke to one obese woman who proudly claimed she only takes a dump every 3 to 4 days. I personally do not understand how someone can be that fat, yet have a metabolism and food schedule so slow that they can go DAYS without taking a shit.
[quote]Professor X wrote:
I spoke to one obese woman who proudly claimed she only takes a dump every 3 to 4 days. [/quote]
LOL, how did that conversation start?
Also, another vote for Benefiber. Even if I did not train, I’d be using this product, literally changed my life.
I remember back five years ago when I was eating 4000 plus calories day and lifting twice daily. I would go at least four times a day. Each time I went, the toilet would look like I had made Kool aid. I continued this trend for about two weeks got worried and made an appointment with my doctor.
Long story made shortâ?¦…I went to the doctor (female) got put on a table. Two nurses came in (female) one grabbed my butt cheeks and pulls them apart. The other grabs a flash light and the doctor shoves her finger in my bum. She feels around and says oh thatâ??s not good. Pulls her finger out, tells her nurse to feel. She echoes the same. She wipes my anus so kindly and the nurses retreat out of the room and the doctor proceeds to ask me, are you gay? I said no, Iâ??m engaged about to be married. She says are you sure, I said Iâ??m pretty positive that I donâ??t have men hanging around my â??campfireâ?? warming themselves. She says its pretty shredded back there and are you sure you and your fiancé donâ??t get â??freakyâ??. I said are you really serious. She said you have to have a scope ran on you to find out the extent of the damageâ?¦â?¦â?¦
Scope was ran and everything was fine just needed more fiber.
Moral of the story is to eat fiber! Eat veggies!
Oh and look for a doctor with small hands.
Homo! lol That’s an awesome story.
Anyone seen the Curb your enthusiasm episode where he is pissed off because he has to walk past the receptionist to go to the bathroom. I have that situation at work.
I am wolfing the calories down and drinking plenty of fluids so there are a few pit stops during the day. The accounts department sits right by the bathroom. I swear they are keeping count.
luckily my work/restroom situation is perfect, so no one can monitor the hour plus worth of shitting pissing I do a day… I’m just close to a door near the restroom, but I always wanted to get a bed pan for my office.
3 pages of shit, literally
[quote]Professor X wrote:
Pussies.
Real men don’t shit. Real men eat 15lbs of meat, wait 6 hours and then cut their stomachs open to remove the remains.[/quote]
Lol, Sometimes I just love this guy.
S
Pics or it didn’t happen.
[quote]Professor X wrote:
BONEZ217 wrote:
BCSteel wrote:
WTF, do you guys have colons the size of pencils? Is that why you have to shit 2-5x per day? I eat a lot of salad in with dinner, helps to keep things coming out quite well. One power dump in the morning, triple flush.
The fact that you only shit once a day is the exact reason why you aren’t big.
His stats list him at 6’3" and only 195lbs. I think the real question is why he hadn’t put the pieces together himself.
Let me guess…I bet he thinks he is a “hardgainer”.[/quote]
I’m actually more suprised you took the time to look at my profile.
I eat approximatly 6000 Cals a day during the week and about 5000 on the weekend.
I think of my self as a guy trying to gain weight, is that ok with you? Maybe you should tell me again what I am lol, then I can tell you what I think of you too.
[quote]3IdSpetsnaz wrote:
Pics or it didn’t happen.[/quote]
not sure if the site is still up as I am at work and there is no chance I’m pulling it up here, if this link doesn’t work google it…or not.
Anyone ever have IBS? That sucks! Had a mild case of it when my diet sucked, switched off of fast food and other crap been running smooth ever since.