At this point, it’s astonishing you’re astonished. I feel like I’m watching syndicated reruns at this point…
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@EmilyQ
I saw your post from two days ago addressed to me. I am sorry for the delayed response and that I will choose not to answer because I don’t think it’s wise or healthy for me to discuss the intended topic. Although I have discussed my personal experience in dating and finding a wife, I was intending to discuss the topic at large, mostly in an impersonal manner thereafter. Both Beyond and GB have noticed the same as I, which is why I repped their posts. Besides that I don’t not feel I have the power to discipline other posters or change their minds for what I don’t condone or disagree with.
However the thread has taken on various directions, perhaps partly from my own doing, and although I am not knowledgeable on everything, another poster who appears to lack self control and made a post that I believe (perhaps wrongfully so, and certainly don’t know) is libelous considering my real life interactions with people on this board through the years and exposure of my face and body, friends, and even family members on both here and social media. Some members know or have met family members. There are several posters I have referred to my specialty physician too.
Generalized statements and observations were construed as hatred and a “bullshit worldview”. I defended myself in a removed post you read. Considering this and my profession and positive relations (including friendships) with a wide variety of people, I will try to discipline myself to never post on heated topics anymore and stick to recreational or fun ones instead.
I am in no way saying this to virtue signal, rather as an example. Just yesterday afternoon I helped an elderly woman who fell in a parking lot. On my drive home I couldn’t help but think of what the aforementioned poster said about me. When online posting, which I believe should be either fun or even mind-opening, and for me, has lead to meeting new people, creeps up on you like that, it’s time to leave!
I have also sincerely repented for bad past behavior online and in real life, by myself in my thoughts, and even in a place of worship. That’s all I can do with that.
That’s it. Maybe we and others converse in a fun thread some time. So long. 
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Fair enough. I’ll see you around the forums.
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It’s part of my makeup, which is what enables me to do my job. It honestly DOES astonish me when people continue self-defeating behaviors, so even after years of weekly rinse and repeat exchanges, I’m still plugging (fairly) enthusiastically along.
Client: I can’t afford a decent place.
Me: Well, what about a job?
Client: My friends avoid me and and I can’t afford my bare minimum existence.
Me: You know, a job would address more than just money, though that’s great to have. You’d make friends, too, and self-esteem…
Client: I moved in with my father-figure neighbor when his wife, whom I care-took for free, died.
Me: You know, you really seemed alive when you were care-taking the woman who died, whose husband you now live with. It seems like doing that for pay would be the perfect combination of satisfaction and income.
Client: my neighbor says he’s in love with me, and I’d never really thought about it before because he’s 20 years older than me and poor and sickly, but I guess I’m in love with him, too.
Me: That’s…you know, it would be good to have a job so that however it plays out, you’ve got options.
Client: I hate my man.
Me: …job.
Client: Sewage is backing up into the trailer and we fight all the time.
Me: …job!
For years now. There are several along those lines. I just keep being astonished. Because honestly, it’s astonishing!
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If you’re referring to my original scathing post concerning you - it’s not libel, and I specifically said it was how I felt several times in that - but if there’s one thing I’m firmly against, it’s having this stuff leak into someone’s real life, so if you were referring to me and you believe that post will affect you outside of these forums, I’ll go back and delete the post. If you’re talking about someone else, so be it.
Edit: removed it anyway. I had already made nice and retracted part of my statement, so there’s no point in having that out there anyhow.
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Not you at all.
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Okay. No matter anyway. Shit gets heated online sometimes, I hate to see someone be affected by it outside. So it will still be deleted. A lot of animosity towards you- from all people- was collateral damage.
ah, yes but for the guy that is perceived to be a real ‘incel’ it’s totally ok?
funny how people don’t see that as being wrong.
If anyone thinks they can post a video of Molyneux and expect some light-hearted fun discussion, they are delusional.
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I’ve only ever been a part-time neighborhood dive bar bouncer, but the parallels are striking. It’s really a pretty shitty job, but I’m somehow drawn to it. I don’t think I’m helping too many people aside from the ones I’ve successfully steered away from really bad decisions, which is an outcome that doesn’t happen nearly as often as I’d like.
Even so, I still have an affinity for the job for what’s probably an array of stupid boyish reasons, but there is at least one good reason. I’m good at it. I’m not sure anyone can be perfect at guiding drunk people to good decisions, so you have to learn to accept the fact that your control over the situation is limited.
I’m not perfect, but I’d like to think of myself as a functioning adult. Like you, I’ve never ceased to be astonished at the unusual and sometimes outlandish personal confessions that have been shared with me on the job. Some of these life updates are now spanning several years.
I’m not there to deliver advice, so I usually don’t. If I was, it would usually amount to aiming higher than whatever shitty job they are presently working, getting a job if they don’t have one, don’t date addicts, don’t spend your money at this bar, take care of yourself, get good at something, and be excellent to each other.
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I have such mixed feelings about this. I feel protective of Brick (not going to tag so if he’s avoiding the thread he won’t be pulled in - if he’s reading along, that’s fine) and my sense is that most long term posters feel the same way. No one wants this guy harmed in any way. So I respect your decision to remove the post. At the same time, and perhaps it’s because I’m female, it distresses me that a strong, well-worded protest is no longer in place for whatever influence it was capable of having should someone who is not one of the two like-minded posters in the thread be reading. We have that goofy meme kid floating around who seems one step away from swallowing the red pill (or whatever), and I’m sure there are others. Then I think, calm down - what are the odds that anyone is reading this thread with the potential to be influenced? But I really have no idea.
Because not everyone is emotionally stable, these ideas - the actual, literal dehumanization of females - are a little panic-inducing for me. It’s common knowledge that rape is an act of anger rather than a purely sexual act, and I see its genesis laid out here.
Isn’t it funny that I attended graduate school at a School of Social Welfare, and I am only just recently, here, taking in that OH! When the SJW’s rant about women being dehumanized, they MEAN dehumanized! NOT FULLY HUMAN, incapable of discernment. It’s actually a thing!
Like, it blows my fucking mind.
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See, to me this is an outcome worth waking up for, and in my gig it happens all the time. A difference is that people have chosen to come to me, and if they make it through the second session without telling me to fuck off, are interested at some level in change. Your customers are there to avoid their problems, so if you’ve had any success ever, it’s a big win.
The client caricatured above is really unusually entrenched and one I struggle mightily with, honestly. I’d have ended the relationship years ago because I’m watching a slo-mo train wreck and not able to do anything to stop it, but she at one time expressed that she’s afraid I’ll dump her, and was clear that she would be bereft. So I try to frame it as that I AM doing good somehow, because maybe it would be even worse if I wasn’t in the picture.
Generally speaking, though, I’m pathologically optimistic. The other primary trait I have that allows me to love my work despite its shortcomings (and I suspect this is you, too) is rabid curiosity. So in a thread like this I’m offered a view into someone’s head - reward in and of itself for me - and not only am I hoping to make positive change, but when I don’t there’s some part of me going “ah! interesting! he perceives the video as confirming his bias despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary! ASTONISHING!” (lol)
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It’s OK, and thanks. I will try to keep my response to this concise. In case you didn’t see, it was not @flappinit. Not once did I have an uncomfortable feeling from his posts, even when I think he misunderstood me. He sincerely apologized a few times and he doesn’t strike me as someone who wants to wreck anyone, even if he were to dislike someone. He also seems like a guy that does have self control. I also think he was unaware that I think he seems likable even though I disagree with him on some matters. Come to think of it, there are a few here I think are likable though I disagree with. I mean, I can’t be friends with the world, but if I were acquainted with some men, would I really base my dealings with them on this topic? We’re bickering over a topic, that’s it.
I truly don’t see how some of my general observations would have me doling out bad advice. If anything I think what I’d say is pretty normal. Example I’d use: “Make sure if you have a talent, go all the way with it. This way you can provide for a family and wife.” I also don’t think it’s off-the-wall that when my daughter grows up if I were to possibly inform here that there are indeed men who overly-objectify women and good looking, powerful, rich men who desire or have “a stable” and that I want to see her with an upstanding man, even if he were downright ordinary, average, whatever. Additionally I don’t see how recalling what I see as very poor parenting habits amongst my previous generation and less-than-stellar households (discussed in the video) can create difficulty for people in relationships and dating as being bad. And there was a sexual revolution. I don’t see discussing its effects as bad either. Is it? I mean, something happens, it has effects, people discuss it.
It was one, specific removed post that I sincerely believe can be qualified as libelous and is absolutely false, with me having real-life proof showing the opposite, as I discussed in a removed post of mine. If what the poster said was true, it would be highly unlikely I live and work the way I do, not to mention my real life benevolent actions and behavior. The posting I refer to strikes me as that of someone who is truly mean-spirited, lacking self control, compulsive, and tyrannical, and even writes in advance what he will think of someone or what someone is like, even before one shares thoughts (eg, “If you think X, you are Y, and deserve Z”). This, in addition to other false statements.
Again I thank you for the sincere words.
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That isn’t how life works?
I can’t speak for Brick’s sentiment here, but I’d think it’s a tad more complex/complicated than the above mentioned linear logic.
I think someone trying to divorce what he believes from who he is and being unwilling to accept consequences is a weak way of looking at life. Own your beliefs and accept what comes with it.
I didn’t interpret what brick said with what you just said, nor did I say anything remotely close to what you just said. I’d recommend you stop attributing your own interpretations onto others moving forward
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While I don’t disagree with this, or most of what you say in terms of your general outlook, your debate style probably does more to entrench potentially reasonable people than to sway them. Much of the time your goal seems to be to win by whatever means, rather than the give-take of teaching and learning.
I think that’s what he’s reacting to.
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I see a lot of his goal as just being a condescending troll. Rarely, as of late, has Z added much to a conversation other than trying to steer towards the direction he thinks it should go…i.e. his inability to get past his disdain for Molyneux and detach the incel issue from Molyneux since it was the first post to kick the conversation off.
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Have to disagree with you. He’s more like Zeppelin.