I really wish I hadn’t.
This has been my position for quite a while.
Like, guys really need to unfuck their shit. The typical self proclaimed incel really need to look at themselves first and foremost. And not accept all of the copium that people give them like “delusional bitches… unrealistic standards…”.
Those are the females problems.
The males really do need to grow up, quit bitching, engage in multiple routes of improvement- physical and psychological to be broad- and present themselves as someone worth being around.
Being a weak minded, weak bodied tubby whiney twat isn’t going to attract women no matter how grounded and realistic a womans standards are.
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I put on the natty anthem from time to time.
The 8 hour arm workout is silly, I think much better arm size could be made from some type of daily arm pumping for 30-60 minutes everyday.
I believe the male-loneliness crisis is caused partly by men themselves. I believe some men are very freaking lazy with male friendship and don’t care about male solidarity. Without this male social base, a gang, crew, posse, clique, whatever term we prefer, they want to go right to the tizzy, which doesn’t come easily when men are socially disconnected altogether.
All these articles and videos about lonely men. Did they think of picking up a phone, calling other men and getting in a car, train, and yes, a plane, to meet one another?
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Valid.
But, in my opinion, what is more valid is living an individuated life of sovereignty where being alone is not lonely. Living a life in alignment with your morals and values such that external approbation and “company” is not needed.
For some, this works, perhaps because of a peculiar psychological makeup that makes it so that they do not feel lonely while alone. I do not think this is the case for most people and loneliness brings several serious health risks.
Being a lone wolf is also incongruent for many peoples’ ambitions or desires and can make life quite difficult. Throughout my life, partly from living for 37 years of the 46 of it in one of the most racially, ethnically, and socioeconomically diverse areas of the planet, I observed that those who are not socially isolated get what they want or need easier than others. They have less social and psychological problems. Some practically had lives handed to them by their families or ethnic peers : money, spouses, friends, businesses, and yes, literal get-out-of-jail resources.
Also, as I’ve said, men hate being womanless.
I commend people who can live high-quality lives being alone. I am someone who has had alienating experiences in life. They were unpleasant and several times drove me to tears and suicidal ideation.
Just to put it out there, I don’t say this for pity or sympathy. Rather that I empathize with lonely men, many of whom I believe are lazy, poorly socialized, discriminated against, and were jipped of older male rrole models. Many were raised like potatoes. My life is filled with people who love or care about me, including a wife and children. Even some people who want to hang out with me, I wish I had more time to spend with them.
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Part of that make up could be “only child”.
The oldest sibling might also have the desire to finally be alone again.
The youngest sibling might of gotten so sick of being told what to do, hand me downs and being looked after, they became independent for an escape.
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Long Island is one of the most segregated areas of the country. You may have diversity, but it’s the Portuguese living in Mineola, the Jews in Lawrence, the Blacks in Roosevelt. Nobody intermingles. It is one of the most racist places in America hiding behind the diversity of the entire island while the racial lines are clearly drawn by neighborhood.
When I wrote 37 years in one of them most diverse areas on earth, I referred to living in Queens.
These are three towns. Also, in extremely-diverse Queens, there are dozens and dozens of ethnic and racial pockets. My high school was extremely diverse. We even had three pages for the Asian last name Lee in our high-school year book. Several social circles there were racially diverse. My uncle owned a store in Woodside/Sunnyside (same town to me) and met people from all over the world during his time there, whether visiting or residing around there: Australians, Georgians, Russians, Brits, Greeks, Irish, German, various Hispanic ethnnicities, black people, Croats, and on and on. If you go to Astoria, you can have a variety of cuisine: Balkan, Greek, Italian, Thai, Chinese, Turkish, etc. I recall about two dozen languages listed at Elmhurst hospital. My own close-friend group with some former and Queens residents are a mixed bunch: three white guys, a Korean, and two Persians.
I am unaware. I’ve yet to meet someone on LI who has expressed racial thoughts to me. I’ve spent much time in my life and have lived on LI for eight years. By this logic, Queens would be filled with racists too as I would be able to go on for some time identifying areas inhabited by particular groups there too. Even in some neigborhoods in Queens there are ethnic pockets within them. I did throughout my years in Queens hear racial statements occasionally.
I do know in the 70s and 80s there was flagrant racism on LI.
I think this is important. Having good male friends (not just work buddies or bar buddies) creates accountability about your own sense of being a man.
But, like you pointed out, it takes work.
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Who drew them? The ethnic groups themselves? 
. Thats who drew the ones in the coal patches.
And why do people have to be different colors to be different?
Call a Polock a Czech and he’ll tell you all about the differences. 
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Right. When I went to a two-day seminar by Jim Wendler in 2025, I drove three hours to Pennsylvania by myself. I don’t think that’s a big deal, but many men do not put themselves out there like that. They need someone to accompany them to make moves. I did not make any lasting friendships from that seminar, but it was a social event with other men that took a lengthy car ride.
Fortunately when I befriended Stu from here he happened to live in my town. Coincidentally my brother moved into his apartment when he moved.
I’ve met and spoken to all sorts of people from the net and this site. Apparently some young people wish to continue to speak about their loneliness and resign themselves to complaining and playing online games with one another at a time when it has never been easier to meet new people and make friends. One can simply type in any interest into a search engine and make himself available to meet people.
I have a phone friend who I regularly speak to who I would have already met in person if we didn’t live across the country from one another.
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When I was not married I did a bit of traveling to train with other folks mostly cause I did strongman comp and I traveled to all those alone and my long time lifting partner was a strength coach and would say “I’m going up to this place or that place of a University strength room” wanna go.
There’s one guy from that experience that I email from time to time. I would also love to meet up with the old chairman of our strongman contests, he’s over 60 now.
It’s not a sitting around and BSing thing. If we meet up we are going to be doing some type of lifting together.
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Good!
Women talk. Guys do stuff. Thats how we bond.
Womens brains are wired to get more out of communication. More areas light up when they communicate.
Guys bond through activities like lifting weights, Work stuff, building, fixing, etc.
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Depends, if you have a group of women lifters……..they like to get stuff done and the conversation that takes place can even scare most men.
My buddies gym was dominated by strongwoman competitors at a point in time, before covid.
Worst gym ever.
Sure
No, not at all, the women push themselves more than many guys do when they are together.
It was the best hardcore intense atmosphere.
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So I was talking to a IRL buddy of mine tonight, and we talked about the holidays, family, books, and somehow the topic of mansplaining came up.
I have an idea I’d like to toss out to the jury. Mansplanning is kind of how men actually talk to each other. We don’t just want directions, we want to know the side streets and escape routes.
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Its technical instead of emotional.
I get that a lot from my wife, that she thinks I’m talking down to her, when really I’m just trying to give her a best possible specific understanding of something.
“You’re talking to me like I’m stupid!”
“No dear, I’m talking to you with the assumption that you don’t already know what I’m telling you. If you did, I wouldn’t be telling you.”
“See? You’re doing it again.”
. I thrive on specificity.
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