Marriage, is it Worth it for Men?

I’m 30 years old, been to Iraq, now lucratively self employed and very happy with my lifestyle. I’ve been the type of person to be very happy with being single and all of my friends who are married, especially the ones who are older than me, say don’t do it, at least until you’re in your 40’s.

One friend of mine who was married and then divorced said that a guy’s best dating years are his late 30’s and early 40’s for various reasons. I’ve had my best dating years. I routinely date girls in their early 20’s, though I don’t usually do it seriously. I’m fairly established, though my best earning years are still coming. I enjoy a social life along with plenty of time for training and other things that I enjoy.

At times I wonder if I will ever consider marriage, especially since the topic always comes up with girls I date (they always consider me marriage material). The truth is that I’m very happy with the way my life is, so I don’t see any reason to change it.

Plus, just knowing how many unhappy men I know in marriages, it doesn’t seem worth it.

What got me thinking about these guys I know is that I ran across this:

"OK guys, I was talking last night and we got a consensus of at least ten guys that the following is what lies ahead for you in marriage. So think carefully before you pop the question.

Year one: Sex, sex, sex. All you could want. On the floor, in the woods, the car, the beach. Every time you?re alone, you?re banging like rabbits. Nothing is off limits. Nowhere either one of you won?t lick, tickle or tease.

Each time you look at her naked body, you are filled with gratitude that God has given you this woman.

Year two: It slows down, but you try to keep it hot just out of fear. You don?t want to become one of those couples. But now there?s no more spontaneous blowjobs. Things are more routine, but that?s OK because you?re still getting it regular and you?re happy.

Years 3-5: Along comes the house and kids. Through it all, you find less and less time or reason to have sex. You go from 7 or more orgasms a week down to probably once a month. You get a bloated beer belly and your love handles turn into big bulges. She gets flabby with baby weight that just won?t go away. The second kid is even worse. She refuses to get stitched up after the second kid and so she?s now so loose you can?t even come inside her. When you do have sex, it?s like fucking a bowl of pudding.

Years 5-7: You decide to get back in shape, to try to revive your sex life. You get trimmed down at the gym, almost to where you were before marriage. She gives it a half-hearted effort, but can?t make much progress.

She refuses to wear any lingerie you buy her, instead coming to bed in a T-shirt (if you?re lucky) or a torn up set of PJs. And you now have to beg and schedule sex, which is cold and automatic. You now are masturbating regularly. In the shower, in the bathroom at work, anywhere, anytime you have a private moment.

But the effect is minimal and you are constantly horny. For the first time, you will contemplate divorce. You?ll visit web sites about it and perhaps skim a book in the bookstore about divorce.

Years 7-9: You find yourself staring in amazement at this woman and trying to remember when she was hot. Want a preview? Picture your girlfriend, now thicken up her arms by a third. Picture her ass all flattened and her legs thicker and more muscular. When you do convince her to make love, she usually quickly gets on her knees for you to enter her from behind and asks you not to fuckup her cold cream while you?re doing her.

She?s dry as a bone and the scent of unwashed ass wafts up as you?re trying to bang her. She is hoping for another baby, but it seems unlikely. Your stomach churns at just the thought. By now you?ve had an affair or two.

Maybe a crazy chick at the office or a couple hookers now and then, but the stress of it is too much. You are in disbelief that you are actually now masturbating in bed beside her as she snores.

Year 9: It?s over. You occasionally score some outside poontang, but it?s expensive. Your wife now openly scorns any advances you make. If you suggest she get in shape, she labels you a woman-hater. Real men like women with curves, not sticks.

Curves, sure, you think, but not roll after roll of blubber. She has stopped shaving, so that if you try to go down on her the hair is everywhere, matted and full of snarls. You hope to God she?s banging someone on the side, but you know it?s unlikely. You try to titty fuck her, but she doesn?t like that. There?s now no way to have an orgasm while you?re actually touching her.

Year 10: You can?t sleep through the night. Even masturbating doesn?t help. You surf the Web or drink into the wee hours, praying for death?s sweet release to come and take you or her.

You?ve talked with a lawyer, but after he lays out the reality for you, you know that can?t afford divorce unless you?re prepared to live in your parent?s basement while all your income goes toward maintaining your wife and kids. Plus, you love the kids. You can?t bear the thought of splitting up their family. Your future stretches before you like a desert, baking and sucking the life out of anything that tries to cross it."

My question is for married and divorced guys, particularly those married more than 5 years, do you feel you would do things differently if you had it to do over again?

If the broad is rich, then sure.

Marry a gym rat.

/Thread.

If you don’t care about having kids then don’t get married, you’ll have more fun in the long run.

No desire to have kids. I once talked to a married friend of mine when we were lieutenants. He said he had no desire to have kids (he was 33, going through divorce). We talked to a senior NCO who was working for us (about 44), he said he thought if you didn’t want it by now, you probably never would.

I am happily married. Been married for 2.5 years but we have been together for 9. We still make things fresh and she is far and away, my best friend.

Dammit, I had no idea there was a schedule. Why couldn’t someone have clued me in before?

Ah,looks like I need to gain about 40 pounds and stop washing my ass. How much should I cut the sex back by? (I’m in year 8)

Fudge, the nasty matted pubic hair might be a problem, damn waxing has killed my hair follicles. I’ll have to figure out a way to make it grow by next year.

I could also use some advice on how to dry out my pussy. According to this, I’m a terrible wife and not doing anything I’m supposed to be doing. Help me out here guys!

absolutely, just dont marry for the wrong reasons.

god bless. p’c

The way you’re portraying the married woman and marriage in general is pretty offensive. There is no reason for your wife to turn into a frigid land whale after childbirth or for you to start cheating on her just because she’s not as tight as she was before a couple of kids.

Your scenario is far fetched and when presented as an axiom most people would rather have the single life than being married.

In my own experience, most marriages I know of (family, close friends, co-workers) are solid, wives are still very good looking (the MILFs you guys are so in love with) and have good, loving husbands. Most of us are around 40, been married 10-15 years, have kids and still enjoying being married.

Anyway, to answer your question, it is absolutely not worth it if you just look for a fuck buddy. Got to warn you though, as you age, chances are even the idyllic single life you talk about will slowly evolve into a sad and lonely life.

[quote]1000rippedbuff wrote:
I’m 30 years old, been to Iraq, now lucratively self employed and very happy with my lifestyle. I’ve been the type of person to be very happy with being single and all of my friends who are married, especially the ones who are older than me, say don’t do it, at least until you’re in your 40’s.

One friend of mine who was married and then divorced said that a guy’s best dating years are his late 30’s and early 40’s for various reasons. I’ve had my best dating years. I routinely date girls in their early 20’s, though I don’t usually do it seriously.

I’m fairly established, though my best earning years are still coming. I enjoy a social life along with plenty of time for training and other things that I enjoy.

At times I wonder if I will ever consider marriage, especially since the topic always comes up with girls I date (they always consider me marriage material). The truth is that I’m very happy with the way my life is, so I don’t see any reason to change it.

Plus, just knowing how many unhappy men I know in marriages, it doesn’t seem worth it.

What got me thinking about these guys I know is that I ran across this:

"OK guys, I was talking last night and we got a consensus of at least ten guys that the following is what lies ahead for you in marriage. So think carefully before you pop the question.

Year one: Sex, sex, sex. All you could want. On the floor, in the woods, the car, the beach. Every time you?re alone, you?re banging like rabbits. Nothing is off limits. Nowhere either one of you won?t lick, tickle or tease.

Each time you look at her naked body, you are filled with gratitude that God has given you this woman.

Year two: It slows down, but you try to keep it hot just out of fear. You don?t want to become one of those couples. But now there?s no more spontaneous blowjobs. Things are more routine, but that?s OK because you?re still getting it regular and you?re happy.

Years 3-5: Along comes the house and kids. Through it all, you find less and less time or reason to have sex. You go from 7 or more orgasms a week down to probably once a month. You get a bloated beer belly and your love handles turn into big bulges.

She gets flabby with baby weight that just won?t go away. The second kid is even worse. She refuses to get stitched up after the second kid and so she?s now so loose you can?t even come inside her. When you do have sex, it?s like fucking a bowl of pudding.

Years 5-7: You decide to get back in shape, to try to revive your sex life. You get trimmed down at the gym, almost to where you were before marriage. She gives it a half-hearted effort, but can?t make much progress.

She refuses to wear any lingerie you buy her, instead coming to bed in a T-shirt (if you?re lucky) or a torn up set of PJs. And you now have to beg and schedule sex, which is cold and automatic. You now are masturbating regularly. In the shower, in the bathroom at work, anywhere, anytime you have a private moment.

But the effect is minimal and you are constantly horny. For the first time, you will contemplate divorce. You?ll visit web sites about it and perhaps skim a book in the bookstore about divorce.

Years 7-9: You find yourself staring in amazement at this woman and trying to remember when she was hot. Want a preview? Picture your girlfriend, now thicken up her arms by a third. Picture her ass all flattened and her legs thicker and more muscular.

When you do convince her to make love, she usually quickly gets on her knees for you to enter her from behind and asks you not to fuckup her cold cream while you?re doing her.

She?s dry as a bone and the scent of unwashed ass wafts up as you?re trying to bang her. She is hoping for another baby, but it seems unlikely. Your stomach churns at just the thought. By now you?ve had an affair or two.

Maybe a crazy chick at the office or a couple hookers now and then, but the stress of it is too much. You are in disbelief that you are actually now masturbating in bed beside her as she snores.

Year 9: It?s over. You occasionally score some outside poontang, but it?s expensive. Your wife now openly scorns any advances you make. If you suggest she get in shape, she labels you a woman-hater. Real men like women with curves, not sticks.

Curves, sure, you think, but not roll after roll of blubber. She has stopped shaving, so that if you try to go down on her the hair is everywhere, matted and full of snarls. You hope to God she?s banging someone on the side, but you know it?s unlikely. You try to titty fuck her, but she doesn?t like that. There?s now no way to have an orgasm while you?re actually touching her.

Year 10: You can?t sleep through the night. Even masturbating doesn?t help. You surf the Web or drink into the wee hours, praying for death?s sweet release to come and take you or her.

You?ve talked with a lawyer, but after he lays out the reality for you, you know that can?t afford divorce unless you?re prepared to live in your parent?s basement while all your income goes toward maintaining your wife and kids.

Plus, you love the kids. You can?t bear the thought of splitting up their family. Your future stretches before you like a desert, baking and sucking the life out of anything that tries to cross it."

My question is for married and divorced guys, particularly those married more than 5 years, do you feel you would do things differently if you had it to do over again?
[/quote]
This is one of the saddest things I’ve ever read.

Hey people, I didn’t write that, as I wrote I found it browsing the web. Only excerpts are from me.

I have been married 7.5 years. Every year gets better (even sex) and I have two kids…I wouldn’t trade any of it for the world.

If what you described happens in a marriage then you suck as a leader and a husband.

Some guys can pull off a successful dating life with younger, attractive females into their 40’s and 50’s, but these guys tend to be rich and the women they attract tend to be interested in that.

The dating scene for a middle class guy who’s halfway between middle aged and his autumn years is pretty dismal. My town in Canada has a bar that caters to 50+ singles, mostly divorcees and a few “lifelong singles”. My God…I went in there once for a laugh…the 6th layer of hell in Dante’s Inferno was far cheerier. For you Simpson’s fans, the typical clientele was strikingly similar to “Starla”, the woman Milhouse’s dad briefly dated after his divorce from Mrs. Milhouse (until she stole his car).

Marriage is what you make of it. If two mediocre people enter marriage, the chances are the situation posted above happening are likely. If you work to balance your career, family life, health, free time and other vital aspects of your life, marriage can be amazing.

I was once told “After 10 years and three kids it’s the mans turn to sit on the end of the bed crying because it’s too big.”

You find the right woman and the rest of your lives are so wonderful you can’t ever imagine it ending.

You find the wrong one and you hope it’ll end soon.

Hope you figure it out before kids get involved.

I’m blessed. 20 year anniversary was new years eve.

We’re both messed up in a way that makes us perfectly suited to eachother.

Proposed to her three days after I first even saw her. Married that year. I was 20, she was the older woman at 21.

[quote]Ttinkerbell wrote:

We’re both messed up in a way that makes us perfectly suited to eachother.

Proposed to her three days after I first even saw her. Married that year. I was 20, she was the older woman at 21.[/quote]

Tinkerbell…Is this a hetero relationship?

I’ve been married for over 20 years to one woman.

Married life and single life are two different things. If you want to remain a boy and fuck and drink and do all the ‘boy’ things, don’t get married.

If, however, you WANT to have kids, WANT to have a monogamous relationship, WANT to be a family head, then get married. Find an intelligent and moral woman (look in a church) who shares a lot of your interests and go for it.

Remember, if all you want to do is play with your toys and fuck, then don’t get married. Stay a boy.

I say the OP should NEVER get married considering his lack of respect for women.

No. Marriage only benefits women, who are lower earners. It used to be for life until half a century ago. Nowadays most women marry either for money, or love. Love can fade, but her legal rights will only intensify. After two years, she can take you for half of every single dollar, Pound, or Euro you BROUGHT IN the marriage.

Bottom line - until and unless you are already planning kids with this woman on a particular year, don’t even let her move in with you.

If you don’t want kids, why get married?

If you still are feeling compelled, instead of getting married, just find a woman you hate and buy her a house. Same result.

I was married for twenty years, the first 13 we were living in the same house. She lives in it now with her boyfriend and my kids.