Marino,
First of all, I commend the general advice from all the T-men/vixens (except for poke’s post, of course), and you should meditate on the gems freely given to you, bro’. Secondly, if this one thought hasn’t become clear to you yet, allow me to emphasize: “You are NOT RESPONSIBLE for her own life! SHE IS!” And, again, you are not RESPONSE-ABLE for how she chooses to respond to the news. She is. And if she chooses to harm herself in some way, that is HER choice. Not yours. I agree: you DO need some counseling just so you can gain some perspective which you have completely lost, my friend. Like most T-men here, I have been through this with my own lovely (screwed-up) lady and, believe me, I wish to God that I had used the balls He gave me (I was so whipped) to have dumped her pretty little rear end when I should. The most Life Affirming thing you can do for each other is to dump her NOW, and get out COMPLETELY. I totally disagree with the “being friends” deal. You have already gone the second…no…tenth mile for her, and it’s time to get out of the race. “Be true to thine own self.” Have you? I don’t sense you’ve honored the best within you for a long time in this relationship. Hope this helps. Peace to you.
Dude listen to me! I had the same exact problem two years ago. I had been going out with a girl for a little over two years. She too had had a really shitty life. Her mom and dad had both died when she was yound. Her step-mom had abused her. Shit like that. She too had cheated on me after two years, and I didn’t find out about it until later. I tried to stick it out because I loved her and she was really sorry. I couldn’t get over it, though. I was miserable. After I broke up with her, I had a quick fling or two and I started feeling better. I had a great time after that.
I know you care about her but you have to put that aside. You have to worry about your own sanity, not hers. Do you think she was thinking about you when she was getting screwed by some other guy?