Its Me Or The Dog !!

Off Topic
41

To make the decision easier ive done a test for you:

============================================
Should the wife stay

1)‘would you eat icecream from nicole scherzinger’s butthole?’

a)yes, would your wife mind if she found out?
a.1)yes, wife aint worth it, club her, throw her into a ditch, fill with cement
a.2)no, shes a keeper, the dog must go, at least send her/him to a loving home

b)no, ‘are you homo?’
1)yes ‘would you do teh gay with ricky martin?’
a)yes, would your wife mind if she found out?
a.1)yes, she aint worth it, club her, throw her into a ditch, fill with cement
a.2)no, you is still teh gay n u aint bangin her, she aint worth it, club her, throw her into a ditch, fill with cement
2)no ‘fuk off u r homo u lying twat n u aint bangin your wife, she aint worth it, club her, throw her into a ditch, fill with cement’

==========================================
Should the dog stay

2)‘would you eat icecream from Beyonce knowle’s butthole?’

a)yes, would your dog mind if it found out?
a.1)yes, ‘don’t be fuckin wet, you cud poke it in teh ass n it wud just lick your finger, dog stays’
a.2)no, ‘of course the dog doesn’t, it cud catch you watchin
hardcore-anal-orgy-piss-drinkin porn videos and wud just go about sniffin its butt, dogs a keeper, dog stays’

b)no, are you homo?
1)yes ‘would you do teh gay with ricky martin?’
a)yes, would your dog mind if s/he found out?
a.1)yes, ‘don’t be fuckin wet, you cud drink from a toilet and the dog wud join you, dog stays’
a.2)no, ‘you is teh gay, doggy still loves you, dog stays’
2)no ‘fuk off u r homo, that is an ass made for eating icecream from, dog still doesn’t care, dog stays’

In the unlikely event of both questions ending in both wife and dog stayin, go fuck a hooker, your wife doesn’t care you ate out nicoles ass, lifes good :slight_smile:

42

[quote]TheSin wrote:
To make the decision easier ive done a test for you:

============================================
Should the wife stay

1)‘would you eat icecream from nicole scherzinger’s butthole?’

a)yes, would your wife mind if she found out?
a.1)yes, wife aint worth it, club her, throw her into a ditch, fill with cement
a.2)no, shes a keeper, the dog must go, at least send her/him to a loving home

b)no, ‘are you homo?’
1)yes ‘would you do teh gay with ricky martin?’
a)yes, would your wife mind if she found out?
a.1)yes, she aint worth it, club her, throw her into a ditch, fill with cement
a.2)no, you is still teh gay n u aint bangin her, she aint worth it, club her, throw her into a ditch, fill with cement
2)no ‘fuk off u r homo u lying twat n u aint bangin your wife, she aint worth it, club her, throw her into a ditch, fill with cement’

==========================================
Should the dog stay

2)‘would you eat icecream from Beyonce knowle’s butthole?’

a)yes, would your dog mind if it found out?
a.1)yes, ‘don’t be fuckin wet, you cud poke it in teh ass n it wud just lick your finger, dog stays’
a.2)no, ‘of course the dog doesn’t, it cud catch you watchin
hardcore-anal-orgy-piss-drinkin porn videos and wud just go about sniffin its butt, dogs a keeper, dog stays’

b)no, are you homo?
1)yes ‘would you do teh gay with ricky martin?’
a)yes, would your dog mind if s/he found out?
a.1)yes, ‘don’t be fuckin wet, you cud drink from a toilet and the dog wud join you, dog stays’
a.2)no, ‘you is teh gay, doggy still loves you, dog stays’
2)no ‘fuk off u r homo, that is an ass made for eating icecream from, dog still doesn’t care, dog stays’

In the unlikely event of both questions ending in both wife and dog stayin, go fuck a hooker, your wife doesn’t care you ate out nicoles ass, lifes good :-)[/quote]

LMFAO with tears down my eyes WTF

43

[quote]DieselAllDay wrote:

[quote]Brother Chris wrote:
Wow…people got shit ass backwards. The guy has a fucking rotten ass dog, I wouldn’t even need to my wife to ask me to get rid of the dog, I’d beat the shit out of that dog with a bag filled with rocks and his own shit. Like hell I’d tell me wife to hit the road, I’m married that bitch for life.[/quote]

you took your cousin to the prom didn’t cha hmm? [/quote]

Yeah, which would be myself.

44

are you freaking kidding me?! i love my dog!! who doesn’t?
she can walk away.
there’s a lot of women out there.

45

You should punch her in the face and stand on the throat and be like “bitch if you fuck with my fucking dog i will end you” then stick it in her pooper with the dog watching, and in the middle of it you give your dog a thumbs up.

46

[quote]Scrotus wrote:
You should punch her in the face and stand on the throat and be like “bitch if you fuck with my fucking dog i will end you” then stick it in her pooper with the dog watching, and in the middle of it you give your dog a thumbs up.[/quote]

and maybe let the dog have a go at it.

Seriously though, the problem is the guy, after years the dog is still shitting in the house?? On top of that having the whole house the dog just happens to take a shit on the wedding dress? Either this is made up or that dog has a sick sense of humor.

47

Make a counter offer! “Ok, I will lose the dog if you agree to a no-sex-withholding clause and doing the dishes five nights out of the week.”

48

Do a loyalty test before you make a decision. Lock them both in your car trunk. Keep whichever one is happier to see you when you open it at the end of the day.

49

[quote]EvanX wrote:

[quote]Scrotus wrote:
You should punch her in the face and stand on the throat and be like “bitch if you fuck with my fucking dog i will end you” then stick it in her pooper with the dog watching, and in the middle of it you give your dog a thumbs up.[/quote]

and maybe let the dog have a go at it.

Seriously though, the problem is the guy, after years the dog is still shitting in the house?? On top of that having the whole house the dog just happens to take a shit on the wedding dress? Either this is made up or that dog has a sick sense of humor. [/quote]
Yeah dude, everyone knows it was your friend who shit on the wedding dress. then the dildo doesnt even have the spine to cop to it and blames it on the dog instead. what a fucking pussy.
But my story would make a great wheaties commercial. Yeah, he could poor a bowl of wheaties on her back, then give the dog a thumbs up.

50

[quote]SailorJerry wrote:
Do a loyalty test before you make a decision. Lock them both in your car trunk. Keep whichever one is happier to see you when you open it at the end of the day.[/quote]

51

[quote]FrozenNinja wrote:

Well, no offense but wedding dresses are a pretty big deal, even to women who aren’t possesion crazy[/quote]

No, they fucking aren’t. LIVING, BREATHING ANIMALS are a bigger deal.

52

[quote]Bullmoose33 wrote:
Make a counter offer! “Ok, I will lose the dog if you agree to a no-sex-withholding clause and doing the dishes five nights out of the week.” [/quote]

I’m worried about you if you don’t think the above is part of the deal to start with.

53

[quote]TheBodyGuard wrote:

[quote]Bullmoose33 wrote:
Make a counter offer! “Ok, I will lose the dog if you agree to a no-sex-withholding clause and doing the dishes five nights out of the week.” [/quote]

I’m worried about you if you don’t think the above is part of the deal to start with. [/quote]

Exactly.

Anyone (woman or man) who witholds sex in a relationship as a form of control is not worth being in a relationship with. Seriously, that should be one of the first rules established when ‘going steady’.

54

[quote]Steel Nation wrote:

[quote]FrozenNinja wrote:

Well, no offense but wedding dresses are a pretty big deal, even to women who aren’t possesion crazy[/quote]

No, they fucking aren’t. LIVING, BREATHING ANIMALS are a bigger deal.[/quote]

I second that. People can be pretty simple in mind when they treasure a lifeless object over an actual life.

55

If that was the dog’s first offence, then the wife was being pretty dramatic, shit happens sometimes. Like others have said, dogs are trainable, as long as you put forth the time and effort.

That being said, I hate the kind of people that just laugh and think it’s funny when their pets misbehave, and I probably wouldn’t be in a relationship with one of those people to begin with.

56

[quote]Steel Nation wrote:

[quote]FrozenNinja wrote:

Well, no offense but wedding dresses are a pretty big deal, even to women who aren’t possesion crazy[/quote]

No, they fucking aren’t. LIVING, BREATHING ANIMALS are a bigger deal.[/quote]

And supposedly women are the compassionate ones. Even though some fuckin dress they wear for four hours then don’t touch again is somehow more valuable than said living, breathing animal.

I truly would just laugh at a woman if she said that to me. I’d probably be able to stop just long enough to tell her to fuck herself before I broke out laughing again.

Probably why I’m single. But then again, no one’s takin my fuckin dog, either…

57

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^^ Agreed.

I don’t have to worry as me and my lady love our dogs equally so we never fight about/over them.

We are technically their staff and in the event of a break up they have attorneys that will tell us what to do

PS: Only 4 of them are pictured…the other 3 were busy. With what I don’t know.

58

[quote]Nards wrote:
^^ Agreed.

I don’t have to worry as me and my lady love our dogs equally so we never fight about/over them.

We are technically their staff and in the event of a break up they have attorneys that will tell us what to do

PS: Only 4 of them are pictured…the other 3 were busy. With what I don’t know.[/quote]

nice dogs man are they maltese poodles ?

59

Haven’t seen this mentioned, but if the dog shit on her dress and fucked it up afterwards it was probably telling your buddy his wife’s no good and he should ditch her. And, if the wife’s offering ultimatums then the dog was right.

60

man I love my dogs, never ever ever would I give them up. I own presa canarios, a little to large for an inside dog. When I broke it off with the girl she wanted one named “cookie”, the girl was out her damn mind!!!

women come and go and they’re incapable of such unconditional love such as my pups :slight_smile: sorry ladies no offense.

if you have a decent size yard , build him a pen/kenel. my pups have 20x40ft pen and individual dog houses. But in my case I can’t afford to accidentaly have one get out either. They got a very bad rep after that San Francisco incident.