I Wanna Talk about How to Get a Girlfriend

Off Topic
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Is it cool if I chime in again?

I like when this topic comes up because it at least gives me a chance to really apply some logic. Much of which I find the Christian communities lack.

As far as what it means to treat others regardless of their actions as humans. It’s coming from a sense that as an individual, it is not ones place to judge or condemn. Be it from someone who’s spent their entire life doing good, or those who commit the most heinous of crimes. The latter is extremely hard to do. But there’s a handful of references, biblically speaking, that mention vengeance is not ours, sin is not categorized, and the methods of operations we have, do not align often times with God’s.

Now that does not mean, let those who commit unspeakable actions, just walk free. Book of Romans in the 13th chapter (if you need specific verses I can add them in), speaks of obeying the laws of the land. If such laws prohibit murder,rape, pedophilia, stealing, etc. We as citizens of the land are to abide by them. Ergo, breaking such laws is punishable by the land that has set up punishment accordingly. I think right there is where autonomy sets in. But with that, I think it’s important to still remember that such treatment need not come from a place of condemnation as individuals firstly, and as a nation second.

When I think of that, I think of the “no cruel and unusual punishment”, amendment regardless of the offense. I think that lines up pretty biblically from my own view, but over the years it seems many states often go their own routes when dealing with members of society who have committed aweful crimes. Now I know it kind of comes full circle. The need to want to absolutely torture those who hurt the innocent is by far an urge I too often find hard to overcome. But right there, going back to the part where I mentioned vengeance is not ours, is an extremely tough pill to swallow. But I think it’s all interconnected, because say you shoot the man who shot someone you loved, be it family or friend, the state which you reside will still charge you with murder, because murder is murder. The reasons behind it were totally different, but the end result is still death.

Hence, why the treatment of others, regardless of their actions, has some sort of …middle ground? If you would.

Hopefully what I said makes any sense?

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ahaha iam close " speak french "

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it is actually one of my interrogation in this life (im 28) to choice a personn more for the quality of her brain, hearth than body or yoga pants, but of course, u are also determined by ur desir for a personn or not.

i get some fear and i would like your advices. If i choice someone for quality and hearth but don’t desir her a lot, maybe with the time that will also change for sure, when u spend time with someone u change also, but i get some fear, that i will fuck other girls that i desir more, only because of good body and pulsion, and i will stay with a personn with who i feel really good and in a harmony, but still, for the personn with who i will live is “bad”.

Is difficult to find the perfect balance between body and brain, because is already difficult to feel good and harmony with someone, so i don’t know what think about that. Maybe is better to stay alone or i don’t know. Maybe my problem is my ego and my eyes and so on.

i find a nice personn i think, really clever and interesting but i don’t desir her so much for the moment, so i don’t know, if i stop faster or if i try and see

also i always was with different, girl, even if she is beauty, after fuck, is still fuck, she look good, but for u that start to be just “normal” after a time that u fuck and fuck and fuck, so for sur who can’t just choice a body because is beauty, but is also difficult, somethime i feel never satisfied because i was always changing, not only because of me, just because that was like that, so i dont know, if i stay with someone i can accept to just fuck this personn and not other girls

i decide to be always honest,even if i loose someone, in this topics a lot of interesting view

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My success with women has always been different in different points of my life, different types of women, and different cities that I’ve lived in.

I don’t think it’s hard to get a girlfriend or get laid. Plenty of ugly dudes who can’t dress and are broke have good girls. Shit, sometimes I think back to times I had hot girls when I dressed stupid and was broke as shit, and now I couldn’t get those kind of girls.

Only incels involve themselves in alpha/beta stuff. That must be a big reason to why you’re not getting laid @jayinem .

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@bapoleon - read about the prodigal son in the Bible. He was exactly where you’re at in life - he went to his dad and got his inheritance early because he wanted to blow it on hookers and substances.

After a while, he’d burnt through all the money, had no real friends, was tending pigs, and was so starved he wanted to eat the filth the pigs were fed. The Bible says he “came to his senses” and realized his dad’s servants were eating and living better than him. He decided to leave the party life, go to his dad, acknowledge his wrongs, and ask to be taken back as a servant, because he felt he was unworthy to be considered a son. When the dad saw him coming though, he threw a party and said his son had returned from death to life.

I believe in most men, there’s a part of us that wants sex with lots of different women. People raised as church-goers can’t openly acknowledge it, but it’s true. The Bible says, “Man’s eyes are never satisfied.” How true!! There’s always another smoking-hot woman with different features or different personality traits; another vehicle with different performance; another… you get the point.

Sex is thrilling for sure but, apart from love, it’s ultimately empty. It’s good you’re honest about what you want right now in life. What caused the prodigal son to leave his sinful life and, more importantly, the desire for those sins, was consequences. Living the way he did also put him out of regular interaction with his dad and changed their relationship until he repented (which, by the way, means to turn away from what you’re heading towards and to go back to what you know is true/right.)

Candidly speaking, I’m a single man and part of me wants to have multiple girlfriends and sexual experiences. What keeps me from doing that, though, is knowing I’d be out of relationship with God. That prospect makes me feel very, very sad, even heartsick, because he is the only one who I can always completely trust, and he’s been with me (and saved me from) so many awful things and situations.

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Aha truth i understand, but why now u can’t ?

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I rarely read the Bible. What I do read is Philosophy. In Book 2 of Marcus Aurelius’s Meditations, he mentioned of Theophrastus’s assertion that offences committed under the influence of pleasure are far worse than the influence of pain. Committing a crime out of anger is far more forgivable than committing a crime because you like doing crime.

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There’s that classic statement in the Bible, wherever its chapter is, that says For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that those who believe in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life.

I was homeless before and lived at a Rescue Mission. Very good people with an earnest desire to spread the gospel while feeding the homeless. Upstairs, for those who were fortunate and resilient enough to get a job, there were special rooms fit for two. I hung out with a complete metalhead. You all know the lyrics to some of the crazier metal songs there are, so I was biased. I flat out just asked the dude if he was a Christian, not knowing religion was such a touchy subject because I was an idiot. He was guarded at first but finally relented and quoted that same passage I just said above. I felt like I learned something.

I’m sorry folks, but if you think you’re a bad boy, you know jack shit about my past. The only redeeming quality about myself is that I’m a goody-two-shoes who’s terrified of stealing a butterfinger in my local gas station. I was never in prison because the true gangsta lifestyle is scary. I know, I dealt with wannabe gangsters when I was in high school back in the Philippines. You don’t know what I went through. And the idea of how REAL gangsters would be to a goody-two-shoes like who hits like a little bitch like Floyd Mayweather was a very scary thought.

(Just to add, and I’m being sincere, if that’s you on your avatar, good for you. You have the attitude of a legit bodybuilder. I don’t have legs like yours and I squat more than the women I have in my wet dreams.)

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Thank you for being one of the few people here who still treat me with dignity.

Call it Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, Drive-Reduction Theory, blah blah blah, ultimately, the only thing that matters in life are food, sex, and friends. Without them, we’ll be too dead to attend Church, our bloodline will be the last person to attend Church, and who goes to Church without making friends?

So yeah, the meaning of life is food, sex, friends, and sex. Did I mention sex?

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Hopefully this thread will further devolve into politics too. Because it is super important for us to share our very limited knowledge and opinions in this forum.

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Soul Fighter is a newbie, I’m sorry to say. But really, any dude who claims it’s easy is full of crap. I’ve seen it time and again. The real manwhores, if they’d even be proud of it, don’t kiss and tell unless they feel they really have to. Women are never easy, ever. Just to give you an idea, Casanova himself once got so brokenhearted he fucked a hooker because the girl he liked didn’t like him back. Women are never easy.

I’m gonna be blunt with you man. As much as many guys here are in a committed relationship with a lady they bang frequently, I’ve pulled shit with women way out of my league and everybody wondered how the heck I did it and do it consistently. GAME exists, but it’s a hard art to master. And the ones who master it pretty much have no lives and are miserable. Better spend time training for MMA… But it exists. The only problem is that once the fantasy is over, the woman is back on her daily life, sadly often times with her husband.

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I know you are referring to me and here’s my response. Yeah, basically. That’s how I am. Except there are boundaries I will never cross. For sex, so long as it’s gotten without force (rape), date rape drug, or blackmail, it’s all good. That is my Christian faith. I’m a LIBERAL Christian. I am Bapoleon Nonaparte, and I will change the world for the better. This is me squatting 395 pounds.

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Do you have friends and close family members?

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You’re very welcome. You come across as sincere to me, at least in your serious posts, and you deserve honest replies. You start and continue conversations here that others don’t, and I appreciate your contributions.

Haha man, I hear you. Objectively, I know we’re made to bring God pleasure, which we do by actually caring enough to look for him til we find him, then learn his ways and give our lives and hearts to him.

But the physical and emotional drives are so strong, it’s easy to lose focus and believe they’re why we were created. I find great comfort in the verses in Genesis where God himself says, “it’s not good for man to be alone, so let’s make a helpmate for him.” Adam had God’s presence face-to-face, all the animals to interact with, the whole garden to care for, and even then, God saw a void for a woman to fill.

In the New Testament, Paul wrote “it’s better to marry than to burn with (sexual) passion.”

In Ecclesiastes, it says, “Nothing is better for a man than to eat and drink and enjoy his work. I have also seen that this is from the hand of God. For apart from Him, who can eat and who can find enjoyment? To the man who is pleasing in His sight, He gives wisdom and knowledge and joy.”

And in chapter 9:

"Go, eat your bread with joy, and drink your wine with a cheerful heart, for God has already approved your works:

8Let your garments always be white,

and never spare the oil for your head.

9Enjoy life with your beloved wife all the days of the fleeting life that God has given you under the sun—all your fleeting days. For this is your portion in life and in your labor under the sun. Whatever you find to do with your hands, do it with all your might."

Eating good food, working hard and being successful, and having a passionate, loving marriage are all gifts from God for us! And when a basic need isn’t met, it’s easy to fixate on it. Like @brickhead, I believe companionship and intimacy are basic needs. Ecclesiastes makes a strong case for doing meaningful work, enjoying the food we eat, and loving one’s wife as being the meat and potatoes of a good adult life. But the book concludes with:

“When all has been heard, the conclusion of the matter is this: Fear God and keep His commandments, because this is the whole duty of man. For God will bring every deed into judgment, along with every hidden thing, whether good or evil.”

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Oh really? We once had a swinger on here who regularly showcased and reported on his sexual escapades.

How many womanizers have you met in your life?

Would you say you’ve met many people or interact with many in your life on a day-to-day basis? Are they a diverse crowd? If you did or do and were an observant person you’d say otherwise.

Would you care to share any success stories of men who live rational lives who simply eat, screw, and hang out? I know of some places on this earth where people do just that. You’re free to join them. Why don’t you? Btw, such places are characterized by various social pathologies, violence, and high rates of bastardy. You’re free to go though.

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Ahh I see. While I don’t agree, I can certainly understand.

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Oooooh this is why I don’t find one, I dress too nice and am too hot! Of course :smiley:

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Talk about the Bible and gangsters. That’s sure to get you a girlfriend.

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Ha! One of the most manipulative, toxic people I’ve ever known was a “tough“ guy who’d spent his life in and out of prison. Had several kids with different women but he could write poetry and basically had the Bible memorized. Somehow had women wrapped around his finger.

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@bapoleon - check this out: Love, Sex, and the Fragile Egos of Men

And @BrickHead - it’s written by a Christian, if, as someone who’s beginning to read the Bible, you want to know a (real)Christian’s thoughts on the subject.

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