I Saw Phil Collins' Dick-Head in the Gym

Off Topic
1

So I’m on the donkey calf raise machine cranking out reps when all of a sudden I look in the mirror and notice Phil Collins, like 4 feet behind me, staring and writing what I can only imagine are song lyrics.

So I turn and glance at him for a second and he looks away. The next thing I know, he moves closer behind me and I can vaguely hear him saying something. I take off one of my earbuds and suddenly realize he’s not talking.

HE’S SINGING. AND NOT JUST SINGING, HE’S SINGING A FUCKING PHIL COLLINS SONG, WITH PHIL COLLINS’ FUCKING VOICE. I DON’T NEED THAT SHIT WHILE I’M LIFTING.

I say, “Hey, you mind? I’ve got one last set.”

He rolls his eyes, puts down him water bottle right beside me, and proceeds to hop on my back like the old school BBer’s used to do.

Now this guy is pretty huge. Probably could be a pron star. I don’t know why this is relevant but thought I’d throw it in there.

Anyway I finish my set and am heading to the change room, when I turn around notice Phil following behind me. No biggie, except for one thing.

I’m not going to sugarcoat this. I can see his penis through his tight-ass gym shorts. More precisely the ridge of the head of his penis advertising itself to my anus.

I’m in the change room right now, writing this post on my phone. Phil is still behind me, breathing heavier and heavier as time goes on. I don’t know what to do and I need help quick. I’m scared. So is Kerley.

Huge. Quickly. Alright. Bye.

2

LMFAO!!!

3

Knew you’d like it, ID.

Is it just me or has this thread disappeared from the GAL page? Mods?

4

It’s still here… thankfully.
Now if the mods could just do something about eliminating Phil Collins, his career, and his back catalog.

5

If you run he will chase you. Don’t run!

Slowly turn to face him and in a firm voice tell him “Go Away. Your career was over when pastel suites were the height of fashion.”, and steadily back away protecting your butthole.

6

parody meme inside joke thread FTW!!!

7

LMAO!

8

Glad this thread has worked out. I made a conscious effort to pack in a lot of material into my first parody thread.

ID and Skyzyks: LOL

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[quote]LarryDavid wrote:
Glad this thread has worked out. I made a conscious effort to pack in a lot of material into my first parody thread.
[/quote]

well done grasshopper.

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First parody out of the past hundred or so I’ve enjoyed.

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[quote]LarryDavid wrote:
Glad this thread has worked out. I made a conscious effort to pack in a lot of material into my first parody thread.

ID and Skyzyks: LOL[/quote]

no progress pics in your hub…fap disappointment 1.0

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[quote]Kerley wrote:
fap disappointment 1.0[/quote]

Now there’s an idea for a thread.

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Shit, I was gonna try and make a Phil Collins parody thread today, but there is no way I can top this. Good job man, I LOLed.

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[quote]LarryDavid wrote:

[quote]Kerley wrote:
fap disappointment 1.0[/quote]

Now there’s an idea for a thread. [/quote]

or a call out thread for some bird pics.

15

^lol

[quote]AttackOfTheChris wrote:
Shit, I was gonna try and make a Phil Collins parody thread today, but there is no way I can top this. Good job man, I LOLed. [/quote]

Thanks, man.

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How many parodies is this? 3?

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[quote]cct wrote:
How many parodies is this? 3?[/quote]

3.2

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Why this is quite lame.

Most lame, indeed.

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Larry David > me

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[quote]Anonym and ADvancedTS: Thanks!

Rock: Fuck you with an AIDS dick!

[quote]cct wrote:
How many parodies is this? 3?[/quote]

lol, a lot… Modesty and Gym Apparel thread, Dickheads at the Gym thread. The “So is Kerley” is a reference to the old thread about Kerley being everywhere. The Phil Collins thing is more a meme now, at least the way I used it here. And the crowbarred reference to Tiger’s voice mail to one of his side-ho’s at the end.

So yeah, 3.2 is right. And yes, I’m proud :D.