[quote]1 Man Island wrote:
In OP’s defense, he’s coming from a culture where arranged marriage based solely on the money/power/respect of his parents is common (why he couldn’t make the connect to a non-marriage context is beyond me), and traditional “western” dating is fairly new. Having lived in a similar culture, the closest you get to a date with a lot of these girls is going to her parents house to eat and watch a movie w/ singing and dancing. On the other hand, rapid development is creating a lot of grey areas that OP may not be able to turn to anyone with.
I’m not really going to give advice on this specifically. But to echo what some others have said, “hot chicks,” and people in general, like to have fun, so you’ll probably be far happier just having fun with the “average” chicks and their friends (male and female). As this circle of friends expands, it will inevitably include some “hot chicks,” some of whom will be genuinely cool, some of whom will just love the status of hanging out with the fun guy in this network. Additionally, have you every actually asked a “hot chick” out? I mean in a respectful, genuine way… not a drive-by, machine gunning, shot gunning, desperate or creepy way? In India, I could see a chick never having been on a date and doing it just for the experience, but a lot of dudes just come off as creepy.
My girl (who, in her defense, attracts a lot of creepy, especially indian, dudes for whatever reason) was waiting for me at a park once in a predominantly desi place. Some dude rolled up on her - too much gel in his hair, women’s sunglasses, too much cologne - with the quick, “What are you doing here? Can I get your number?” Now, this dude made no attempt to actually realize if he wanted her number and it was obvious he wasn’t the type of dude worth getting to know. My girl, a sweetheart to all, told him she was waiting for someone else and she wasn’t interested. Dude decides to turn up the creepness factor, put his hands together, and plead, “Pleeeeeasssseeeee!” as if that would change her mind. My girl, caught off guard by this odd behavior, couldn’t help but laugh in his face. So, OP, do not beg, plead, or try to trick “hot chicks” into getting into you.
Also, effeminacy in indian dudes is a bit more common than the west. Yes, it’s a stereotype, but western dudes grow up wanting to be cowboys and soldiers. Indian dudes grow up wanting to sing and dance.[/quote]
This is spot on. The typical Indian male with a normal upbringing at his age in Asia is usually still very socially naive if he’s from a less “westernised” part of the country, or if his parents are the strict traditional type of people.
There is a big cultural difference. For example, in some parts of India, it is normal for straight males who are very close friends to hold hands while walking down the street.