How to Establish Company Policy

Start with a cage containing five monkeys.

Inside the cage, hang a banana on a string and place a set of stairs under it. Before long, a monkey will go to the stairs and start to climb towards the banana. As soon as he touches the stairs, spray all of the monkeys with cold water.

After a while, another monkey makes an attempt with the same result - all
the monkeys are sprayed with cold water. Pretty soon, when another monkey tries to climb the stairs, the other monkeys will try to prevent it.

Now, turn off the cold water. Remove one monkey from the cage and replace
it with a new one. The new monkey sees the banana and wants to climb the stairs
To his surprise and horror, all of the other monkeys attack him. After
another attempt and attack, he knows that if he tries to climb the stairs,
he will be assaulted.

Next, remove another of the original five monkeys and replace it with a new one. The newcomer goes to the stairs and is attacked. The previous newcomer takes part in the punishment with enthusiasm.

Again, replace a third original monkey with a new one. The new one makes it to the stairs and is attacked as well.

Two of the four monkeys that beat him have no idea why they were not
permitted to climb the stairs, or why they are participating in the beating of the newest monkey.

After replacing the fourth and fifth original monkeys, all the monkeys that have been sprayed with cold water have been replaced.

Nevertheless, no monkey ever again approaches the stairs. Why not?

Because as far as they know that’s the way it’s always been around here.

And that’s how company policy begins…

From a joke I received in email. Thought I’d share.

Yeah, a friend of mine recently got a new job and she was telling me how the one thing she didn’t like is that it seemed like they were constantly going to have pot lucks and gift exchanges at the drop of a hat.

I told her it’s tradition and half the people doing it probably don’t even want to participate, but feel obligated because that’s how it was when they got hired.

D

[quote]Dedicated wrote:
Yeah, a friend of mine recently got a new job and she was telling me how the one thing she didn’t like is that it seemed like they were constantly going to have pot lucks and gift exchanges at the drop of a hat.

I told her it’s tradition and half the people doing it probably don’t even want to participate, but feel obligated because that’s how it was when they got hired.

D [/quote]

I pissed off a lot of people at my work when I said I wasn’t going to pitch in $30 bucks every time someone had a birthday. It boils down to giving someone else $360 of my money to buy me a bunch of shitty gifts I didn’t want to begin with. It makes no sense. So now I’m the heartless bastard.

This is also how religions got started…and maintained through the millenia.

It sounds like an accurate representation of primate behavior as well.

[quote]doogie wrote:
Dedicated wrote:
Yeah, a friend of mine recently got a new job and she was telling me how the one thing she didn’t like is that it seemed like they were constantly going to have pot lucks and gift exchanges at the drop of a hat.

I told her it’s tradition and half the people doing it probably don’t even want to participate, but feel obligated because that’s how it was when they got hired.

D

I pissed off a lot of people at my work when I said I wasn’t going to pitch in $30 bucks every time someone had a birthday. It boils down to giving someone else $360 of my money to buy me a bunch of shitty gifts I didn’t want to begin with. It makes no sense. So now I’m the heartless bastard.[/quote]

Yeah, I told her make nice for a time and once you establish your work value tell them you don’t want to participate. She probably won’t have the nads to do it though.

D

That is no joke. That is the truth for both Government Agencies I have worked for. Ha Ha.

[quote]Miserere wrote:
This is also how religions got started…and maintained through the millenia.[/quote]

Thanks for being the one to drag that shit into a joke forum. Really added a lot.

I swear if there was a thread about aspirin some ass clown would interject religion somehow and then bitch about it.

why cold water?
Why didn’t they spank the monkey.

Instant shared fear. Convenient and effective.

[quote]btm62 wrote:
Thanks for being the one to drag that shit into a joke forum. Really added a lot.[/quote]

So it’s OK to say that’s how government agencies work, but not that that’s how religions work, right?

Government agencies: Funny.

Religions: Unfunny.

Kay, got it.

I defy you to find a single case or word of “bitching” in my post.

Now let this ass clown explain to you why this monkey story is a joke:

Because

it’s

true.

If this weren’t how companies, government agencies, religions, and in general, any organised, long-lived, human conglomerate acted, it wouldn’t be funny.

Breath deep, and enjoy the fresh air.

Take it easy, dude.