I did that before by buying a really expensive bottle of wine. Can’t afford to just buy a BMW on a whim lol. People are really focussed on looks and status in some areas. My wife would never allow me to dress like I do back home when we’re out on social occasions there or just shopping on the streets. And that’s when we’re in a 2nd tier city.
I think it’s a lot to do with the Hukou system which separated rural folk from city folk and led to such a wide income gap and even different cultural/social etiquette. The 外地人(rural people) fuckers speak REALLY LOUD.
Some fuckers can almost give me a heart attack when I’m dining in a restaurant when they suddenly start yelling and it’s just part of normal conversation for them.
Exactly, 100% the same for my wife. Even amongst her China friends where I live. She doesn’t even know jack shit about brands so she had to get a friend to pick them for her.
oh yeah, he’s like that too, especially on the phone- doesn’t help his image
Luckily for my dad’s company, the other partner is a Chinese- French dude who makes knockoffs look like the real thing
That is one of my primary motivations for choosing to go into academia. No one to force me to wear heels or put on makeup
I love luxury stuff, too poor to afford it and too lazy to live the lifestyle if I could
And people are still calling China “socialist” lol.
Tell me how much money the government handed out to the population where they did the lockdowns? People need to hear this from someone who has lived in China.
LOl it’s like the same thing by definition, just different stages. “Socialist” would be a more apt description because of the existence of total State control.
I’ll give the answer to my question:
ZERO.
The CCP handed out ZERO money to people when they locked them down. My local friends from China were fucking laughing when the locals here were demanding more money from the government and calling it a “nanny state”.
And then they started mocking some of the CCP’s rationales for not handing money out:
“Chinese people traditionally already save lots of money for their weddings so we don’t have to give them any.”
I mean, yeah, I’ve said before somewhere it’s kinda true. My parents did the same for us when we gave them their monthly payouts.
But the ONE time… the ONE FUCKING TIME where State intervention in terms of giving people handouts was totally 100% justified because the State had undertaken this responsibility by preventing them from working and they DIDN’T DO IT.
I don’t disagree with your statement re: men at all, but would only point out that there is overlap here with women. Pragmatism and decisiveness, for example, are the qualities of intelligent, confident people. Men have been longer in the public sphere, so have historically had more opportunity to exhibit these traits, but I believe they exist across the board. Boldness (risk-taking more prominent in men); strength (obvious advantage male here); and stoicism (forced through history) definitely fall more heavily as traits on the masculine side. There are many other positive attributes I would say favor men, but then we’d have to prize out what sort of protectiveness we’re talking about, e.g. men drawn to military and law enforcement, while women historically known to starve in order that their children eat.
However, all of that said, I do appreciate manly men of strong character very much, and can easily differentiate them from the “toxic masculinity” of aggressive, angry pigs or misogynists.
Be careful here. Cattiness is a quality found in a small subsection of a very large group, and as above generally is not correlated with either intelligence or confidence. Women are more adept at keeping affairs secret, offering emotional support, and accessing emotional support (do better after divorces and deaths of partners). These are research-supported qualities. I don’t believe cattiness, if we define it as “expressed hostility toward one’s peers,” is proven greater in women than men.
I think it’s fine to have a social group that favors males for whatever reason, but catty women who “prefer male friends” are generally in competition with one another. They are hyper-sexualized, despite generally claiming they get along better with men because “men are so honest, so thoroughly square; eternally noble, historically fair” (My Fair Lady). I find those women shockingly insecure. I might even label them as exhibiting “toxic femininity” and as such find it unhelpful to accuse the larger group. I understand you haven’t done that, Anna, but as your single example of a quality women have in greater numbers due to their more developed ability to read nonverbals, it rang a bell for me.
Looking back, that’s a bias on my part. I was referring to the tendency to form very tight social groups.
I’ve never been able to get into one of those on my own (when I was little, my friends were my parent’s friend’s kids). Ppl are nice to me, but I’m always an outsider with groups of girls. There have been many instances where I make friends with two ppl who don’t know each other, introduce them and they hit it off and leave me behind.
My brother, on the other had, goes to a two week summer camp and is still in touch with some of the friends he met 2 years later. This has nothing to do with him being male btw.
I’m seriously glad no one took what you wrote in that post the wrong way in this forum.
At the risk of pissing lots of people off, I’ve preferred employing females and hated working for female clients from middle management since the late 2000s but lots of roles in my main business aren’t suitable for women because of the type of stuff we had, and sometimes still have, to do to entertain clients that I’ve wrote about before(you know, like the kind of places we had to go to lol). And there was the issue of pregnancy while holding large client accounts, which would be really disruptive because my business was so small at the time any loss of a large account could result in a net loss that year.
IME, men seem to fall on 2 extreme ends of the spectrum. Some were unbelievably self-motivated, ambitious, capable and more demanding, which made them hard to retain at the time since we were a tiny startup, while the others seemed to take things for granted - like they felt they were entitled to things. The ones I hired as interns or in lower starting positions were less likely to put in their full efforts because they thought they deserved more or something. In contrast, women in general seemed to be more “grateful”(not really an apt description but I’m not sure what other English term to use) for their jobs and would do it to the best of their capabilities regardless of their positions.
Women in general were also more organized(way more), responsible, took more pride in their work and would work harder as employees though they required and appreciated more micromanaging. A lot more. All men I’ve employed hated it. On the other hand, they were more uptight and demanding as clients, which meant they got better quality of work, and were more likely to negotiate prices, which meant they got more out of their allocated budgets. The only flipside was they got lower budgets the next year to play with if they went underbudget on their end, which would piss off their team or anyone succeeding them in their roles if they left or got promoted lol.
In my small, unrelated side business, 90% of my staff are women. Even though the nature of the related skills required for employment in most roles pertaining to that specific business skews more towards females, the ability to manage it isn’t affected by gender. The one in the second highest position and making most decisions is female and I’ve often joked that my active male partner, who is the “boss”, is like the Queen of England - mostly just holding a ceremonial role because of his reputation, past qualifications and share of the business.
This is just my experience as an small employer in an Asian country so all you men don’t get your panties in a bunch.
