The Rocky Balboa pint of raw egg. Fire and brimstone my friend.
Yo! Adrian, we got any eggs?
Could we please, PLEASE hear the back story on how you came to be living with this skank, why she is a skank, etc? I feel like theres a great story behind all this.
OATS! eat lots of OATS!
Protein shakes bro, protein shakes.
well if ur not concerened about what ur eating while doing this. beer farts…particularly from Pilsner Urqwel(spelling). I had one and for 2 days my farts were rank.
Ok a few of you have got some moderately good suggestions but for the worst…and I mean the worst farts you will ever smell, the kind that will hurt your ass because they are so hot, dense and concentrated when they come out your ass - there is nothing like spicy food. While any spicy food will give your farts a kick there are a few dishes that I really suggest.
Entree
- Dahl - which is a split pea garlic tasting dip that you eat with a garlic flat bread called nahn. Indian restaurants do this but for the best results find an Afghan restaurant if you can - this is fuckin unbelievable man !! You have to really hate this chick!
Main
2. Follow this up with a hot curry dish - any will usually do the trick, but I suggest Vindaloo - but it’s goota be hot.
Chase all this down with a beer or 2 and you will soon be stripping the wall paper of your apartment and scaring her for life!!
Get that chopped garlic that comes in a jar. It tastes a lot weaker than fresh garlic, so you can eat a lot more of it. Just sit down and polish off a four ounce jar, then wait for the fun to begin.
Oh shit Cauliflower will destryo all that stands up just eat a ton of old fashioned Steamed cauliflower, with nothing on it and you’ll be lightin up the hills with methane deposits, just don’t light a match in the blocks surrounding for your and their saftey.
Try chopping up a dozen or so garlic cloves, then make a couple egg salad sandwiches and choke it down. My brother and I did this, Trust me this fog will hang for quite some time and give whomever it contacts a severe case of zits.
Stucross has a point with the spicy Indian. I think it’s the combination of the meat with all the garlic and onions, but I was almost banned from my own bed by my fiancee last time we had Indian – it was doubly bad for her because I love spicy food and she does not, so she could not return fire very well…
Oh, forgot about this food from my earlier list: dried apricots. Very good secret weapon. A bit high in the fructose, but guaranteed results, especially if combined with all the others above – dried fruit, and especially apricots, tend to have high sulfur content.
American Body Building’s XXL drink always ruined my day. Besides being able to let out endless amounts of a-bombs you will also be able to master the technique of shitting through a screen door. For maximum effect consume the drink in under ten minutes and follow with 2-3 hard boiled eggs. Be conservative with your blasting level as the “Shart” is very likely to occur with this blend of food.
GS
Well, we dated last spring and before I moved away for the summer we decided when I came back in fall we would live together since I was interning where she was starting to work full time. But as summer goes, we broke up because she got pissed that I told I didn’t want to speak with her while I was in Texas and she was still in NY. So I stopped answering her calls and she got pissed but didn’t have the balls to not let me move in when I came back and I tried to find alternate housing with no luck. So the bottom line is: she is pissed I won’t have sex with her anymore and now I want to stink the bitch up.
Make your last meal of the night a can of tuna with fresh pressed garlic garlic, olive oil and a little salt & pepper. Add 2-3 hard boiled eggs on the side and you’ve got a meal that will keep the aminos flowing all night long, plus you will brew farts that will strip the chrome off the bumper of a 57 Chevy.
Don’t forget to finish the above with a beer! I’m canadian in case you are wondering.
Good luck,
M
She’s letting you move into her home rather then renege on a promise, and you are here looking for help making it miserable for her? You, my boy, are a dick. Or more likely some bizarre fucker who made that shit up for the oppurtunity to discuss farting in a public forum. Pathetic.
DUDE…2 SIMPLE WORDS AND YOU WILL FART SO BAD THAT SHE WILL THROW UP…SHE WILL HATE YOU…
WHITE CASTLE…Eat like 10 and get the onion rings…your farts will smell like the garbage in the back of white castle…
personally Ive found powdered Egg protein to produce prodigious amounts of ass gas.
[quote]tinman915 wrote:
She’s letting you move into her home rather then renege on a promise, and you are here looking for help making it miserable for her? You, my boy, are a dick. Or more likely some bizarre fucker who made that shit up for the oppurtunity to discuss farting in a public forum. Pathetic.[/quote]
Yes he may be dick, but that’s okay I learned alot from all of these posts. Thus, the master is now a student.
“Sancho”
hey man,
right now i am eating chicken and oats during the day with a weight gainer protein shake for breakfast and before i go to bed using skim milk to mix with. my farts are so bad even my cat runs downstaris to his litter box room to escape my smell. lethal is an understatement.
Milk, lots and lots of milk, as much dairy as you can.