Damn I sure as hell hope that pornhub comment was trolling. If that was me at 13 with my dad, I’d be slapped into the high heavens lol.
SB
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I think this guy is 100% serious, and quite reckless. Somebody above mentioned he’s trying too hard to be his son’s ‘buddy’. I think that’s spot on.
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Imagine being this kid. Your dad thinks you’re obese with 12% bf and he chats with you about naked pictures of your 13 year old classmates. If you’re training a baseball player I don’t know how this helps. Now if you’re training a serial killer then I’d say this is a pretty good start.
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For what, the snideness of the remark or the sheer notion of watching porngraphy
To be fair all he said was “put that away”, not “nice nudes dude, high five”. I think the biggest problem at stake (in terms of ethics) is the notion of giving a child PED’s… there needs to be lines drawn, for instance… it probably isn’t appropriate to be snidely remarking about the kind of pornography one watches with their father, it’s just not something that’s really appropriate to talk about regardless of age… It’s fairly obvious that I watch pornogrpahy, my parents know/knew, but it’s not like I’m actually going to talk about jerking off to porn with my parents… that’s… weird, I just don’t think an individual should be punished for watching porn, it’s a normal part of teenage experimentation, growing up etc… I still think the primary issue at stake is giving a child PED’s
I anticipate being crapped on for this… But I realistically wish to know… is it actually ‘child pornography’ when the receiving party is also VASTLY underage? I mean, child pornography typically refers to sexually explicit photos of children right? This would be the case here, but when the receiving party is also a dumb kid, I just don’t think the laws exist in this case for the intended purpose (to curb the exploitation fo children)… two consensually send photographs, when not shared around etc doesn’t fit my bill of child exploitation.
Given that I don’t live in America ANYMORE I can only vouch for laws in Australia, and I know that when a teenager sends another teenager a naked picture we have (depending on the state, but in general) we have something known as the “similar age defence” wherein so long as the picture isn’t shared and is kept between the two parties, no wrongdoing has been done
That’s strange, it was incredibly different for me… though I’ll agree with the notion of “everyone was fucking”… conservative attitudes, parents trying to stop kids with punishments, keeping a short leash on their kids didn’t work… just made them sneakier… That being said there were some dumb enough not to keep up date on education regarding practicing safe sex
I just don’t think it’s something kids should be punished for (especially by the law)… what good is putting a kid potential behind bars or even on the sex offenders registry list because he received a photo? I do believe a kid has the ability to say “no” to sending or receiving photos… whilst I wasn’t good with girls as a youngster… or now… there were numerous occasions in which I was asked for nudes…: I never said yes, I could’ve said yes but I’d think “where will this photo end up, who will it be shown to”… my response was always “if you want to see me naked we have to meet in person…” but I think even that has the potential for legal repercussions
The age of consent/barriers for minors and sexual interaction should exist for the sake of protecting the child from Pedophelia, being taken advantage of… not two hormonal kids experimenting with one another… I lost my virginity at the age of fifteen, to a girl that was older than me mind you (by more than a year)… does this mean she should’ve been locked up? Absolutely not… furthermore my parents knew I was seeing this girl, that I was sexually active… I suppose that makes them terrible parents for not punishing me for it… we didn’t outwardly talk about it, but given the condoms that were present within my drawer it was pretty obvious, and I was asked about it… I don’t see anything wrong here in my outlined scenario
There are too many posts for me to keep up. I don’t understand why you forcefully interjected yourself into parts of this thread. Nothing in my post was hostile. I still stand by my opinion that most of us thought we had shit figured out at certain ages, only to figure out later that we were wrong. You’re right in the wheel house of ages that fall victim to that.
You have very recently forced arguments with people in a very defensive manner. I’ll admit that you were kind of attacked in one thread, but not in this one. You appear to be losing control of yourself. It’s a bad look for an internet medium because it’s so easily taken out of context.
America is part conservative and part liberal. I’m conservative. I have my beliefs and firsthand experience. My job allows me/forces me to get involved in hundreds, possibly thousands of peoples’ lives every year. And it’s on their worst days. I see problems in their behavior and environments and can see commonalities. Those things form my views and opinions. I’m not trying to convince anyone otherwise.
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I disagree with the notion of losing self control, that would imply a facet of mental instability… however I could be wrong, and I believe that perhaps my posts could be read out of context and construed as defensively forcing my ideology upon others… that being said I do agree with the arguement that I’m too defensive (more on this further down)
I engrained myself within this thread (perhaps uneseccarily, so I apologise there) because I saw ideology of which I didn’t agree with and wished to spark a conversation as to why sex, specifically regarding sex and teenagers (the most hormonally voilatile portion of ones life) should be thought of as such a taboo subject.
You said I wasn’t mature enough to get involved with pharma, and I believe you’re right… to a degree, the notion of me requiring TRT was medically nessecitated, hence I don’t think that was my fault… nor do I regret starting testosterone replacement when there didn’t appear to be any other avenue in relation to helping me feel better
Furthermore as to be being more forceful/aggressive with my arguments. I don’t believe this is a neurologically/pharmacologically induced condition. Over the past six months or so I’ve gradually built up more and more self confidence, become more passionately opinionated regarding certain topics and ideologies. The increased confidence coupled with being passionate regarding certain issues has caused me to question and outright argue against certain ideology harboured by others when previously I’d leave it alone, keep my thoughts to myself
However I appreciate constructive criticism… and if you could help me regarding how to construct a coherent, meaningful rebuttal/argument without coming off like a hot-headed, aggressive teenager I’d highly appreciate it… because that not how I wish to be thought of
Granted I’d completely understand if you don’t have the time to do so.
I do tend to admittedly be rather defensive when defending my points/ideologies.
If I had to guess where it comes from I’d stipulate it relates back to being bullied for a very large portion of my life (for being… different). In response I frequently feel as if I need to back up all my arguements/ideologies intensely, call off rebuttals with a degree of force because… I always feel as if people are out to get me, having gotten so used to being attacked the whole time… this is certainly something I need to work out with a psychologist, because I don’t like the fact that I sometimes come across as being a bit of a dick because I’m so defensive. I shouldn’t feel as if I have anything to prove… yet this is how I consistently feel… as if I need to “prove” I’m worthy of being opinionated, harbouring differing ideologies to others etc…
I further agree with you’re age related comment regarding knowing everything… I certainly don’t have my shit figured out… no one really does at my age. I have a broad vision regarding the kind of life I wish to leave (medical/science related career) and I’m going into biomedicine… that’s pretty much all I know, and I WISH I had a better vision regarding what I want out of life… as the question regarding what I should do… why… and where should
I live out my life etc… it kills me that I still don’t know!
I’m more than happy to take in lifestyle advice from others, especially given that I don’t currently have a role model of sorts to guide me throughout my journey… initially I had physiologik as a role model, someone whom I thought was morally ept, someone I aspired to be and/or respected a great deal… the way things turned out there did not help my situation at all…
Should also specify within my prior response to you, my intent was not to come across as hostile, so I apologise it was seen as a hostile response
Ok guys, go easy on the ‘child pornography’. It’s not child pornography when a 15 yo girl sends a 13 yo pictures completely voluntarily. In Germany the age of consent is 14 if both parties are under 16. So here that would be more like the girls being the criminals because he’s 13. But at 13 we all were horny as hell and the last thing we would complain about would be nudes of older girls.
I’d be more concerned if my son is watching pornography, that fucks with his brain. If he’s got real girls, there’s no problem at all besides that he shouldn’t have sex/get kids that early, which fair enough is a big thing.
There’s nothing criminal here.
And if one accuses the father of looking at them for more than a second, he didn’t imply that or say that anywhere.
Besides that, yes, no roids for a 13 yo.
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I was thinking the same thing. I think there’s some type of psych issue here. He seems to back track quite a bit and lacks common sense.
At one point, he was. But I read that from his 11 y/o pre-football physical that I didn’t read the date on. He’s shot up and slimmed up but I didn’t notice bc I see him everyday and he’s just a “thick” kid. But all that belly fat is gone and he’s mostly muscle. Actually just had to get him new baseball pants 2 sizes smaller than last year!
I finally looked back at old photos in my phone and OMG has he grown. Again, I made the post after he had such an awesome game and had a collegiate coach come to the 10 team scrimmage just to watch my son… and my head was big and was wanting to give him a boost but the adrenaline has worn off and I realize he is just fine.
My grandfather bought me a subscription to Playboy when I turned 14. My mother bought me a gross of condoms when I got my first girlfriend.
If it’s not for you, fine. But I parent with my eyes open. He has an iPad, phone, laptop and gaming computer. How are we going to keep him from jerking off? IDC if he talks about it.
My 17y/o daughter wants to go off to college, about 5 hours away. I asked her why and she said “I wanna go to a stuck up, sorority college. I’ve been around those nice sororities and no one is smoking pot. I’ve tried it 3 or 4 times. I don’t like it. Everyone here smokes and they call me the narc. at school bc I won’t. Plus everybody’s popping pills. Adderall, pain killers. They sell it at school.”
Ok. Good enough. I’ll pay the extra $15k/year for the out of state tuition if she’s wanting to get away from drugs and I’m glad she told me that she tried pot. She also came to her mother and asked for birth control earlier this year when she got her first real boyfriend. We discussed she still needs to enforce condoms bc of STDs etc. but I’m glad she came to us wanting birth control rather than a nursery added onto the house.
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I don’t entirely agree with this, but each to their own… granted you can buy many issues of playboy here at 15… this is supply, not merely knowledge of the festivities
It seems you’re part of quite a progressive family, there are many different styles of parenting. Whilst I have no direct experience within this field, thus it’s probably inappropriate for me to be contributing here… I do believe from what I’ve seen that the parent needs to cater their style of parenting based on the attributes/mentality of the child at stake, it’s not a one size fits all approach… I’m not sure if there is a “right” way to go about things
The notion of parenting is a very complex and daunting task… I’ve thought about it, what if I end up with a child one day whose exactly like me? Would I look at my child and accept his behavior, everything he does? Probably not… but I firmly believe at this point I’d steer clear of excess punishment, i’d want an open relationship with my child… but I wouldn’t want to be his “friend” or “buddy” as such a relationship can lead to a detrimental outcome, a lack of respect formed between the child/father
Another facet of parenting, especially with the first child is that one is always new to the game, and given no one is perfect… it’s impossible to know what the right thing is for ones child… we can only guide said child in the right direction by using the strategies we perceive the be correct, and honestly… sometimes as a parent you’ll get it wrong, and that’s fine… we all make mistakes… but with a child the stakes are very high if one fucks it up
We aren’t best buds, but I’m not nieve to what a teenager does. In fact he’s grounded right now for not doing his homework last night.
For his weight, He’s just solid. It’s winter so I haven’t seen him w/o his shirt in awhile. He has big wide shoulders and big arms but his gut is gone. He does have self esteem problems from being called fat in the past. His best buddy is 5’7” 118 lbs and the star RB. I think he wants to be built like that.
Fun fact… at his age I set the school record for “not doing my HW most times”… more like a record of “most times kept after school”…
Didn’t get my shit together regarding schoolwork until I was 16
Since this thread is a fucking train wreck I might as well jump in.
I’ve never done homework. Ever.
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I was looking at Playboy magazine when I was like 12. If you think your kids aren’t looking at porn you’re nuts. Watch the show Euphoria on HBO if you want a look at a day in the life of today’s generation.
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So much this (the point about euphoria)… it’s so accurate it’s ridiculous
That being said I try to distance myself frequent partying/all that stuff… doesn’t always work though
I’m down for a night of fun every once in a while… but I do think this current generation takes it a biiiit too far
I should add it’s also incredibly fucked up how badly our generation tends to be overmedicated when they don’t need it… particularly pertaining to amphetamines, SSRI’s and SNRI’s
I’m sending you a high five through the screen… you can choose to accept it or deflect it… I found a playboy magazine when I was about twelve! That’s how it all really started… looking at pornography that is
High five for habits that induce dopaminergic dysregulation!
Internet porn though, not until I was about 14
High five accepted (robot voice). Yeah internet porn when I was really young consisted of a picture on a screen that took 10 mins to load pixel by pixel and if someone in the house picked up the phone your internet disconnected and you’re fucked. Plus the computer was in the living room so every 10 secs you had to run over to the doorway and check to see if someone was coming. I sure miss dial-up.
LOL I remember that exact scenario. AOL dial up… eeeeer beep boop eeeerr…… picture loading
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I’m talking about the dad looking. I give zero fucks what the kids are doing with each other. I don’t believe the dad told him to put it away when he saw it. He fucking looked and he knows it.