Hallowed: Jackin Yo T!

Training
421

[quote]buckeye girl wrote:
So…I was following the SAMA drama and just wanted to say that you fuckin’ rock.

I think I remember you saying at some point you weren’t going to post real before pictures…and you didn’t…but the changes you’ve made are awesome. I always think seeing where someone has been makes seeing where they’re at much more meaningful. Keep on killing it, girl.[/quote]

IDK what my intentions with the whole story and the before pictures was. I have shared them privately with several women on these boards along with my story. I did not ever show them to Hip Scar he found them on lowcarbfriends the website where I finally got good advice on seeking treatment for my thyroid disease. I have considered posting them myself several times and maybe halfway intended to do so. IDK really.

The thing about them is that time period just really wasn’t real to me. I mean I KNOW INTILLECTUALLY how sick and fat and miserable was I vaguely remember it… but it is the same as other pain, a human coping mechanism is denial. At this point it all seems so removed and unreal to me. A coworker once asked me “don’t you feel SO DIFFERENT” well no, not really. That fat person was different. That fat person wasn’t me. That fat person was unreal. That is not how I ever viewed myself.

Whats done is done they are posted there now and I can only accept that they are there for a reason.

[quote]LastStand wrote:
You are lucky to have had such a wonderful and inspirational woman in your life. My deepest condolences to you and your family.[/quote]

Thank you so much! I truly count my blessings and am grateful for everything.

[quote]nlmain wrote:
Just wanted to say the homage to your grandmother was beautiful and well said. Having such people in your life is a gift.

off to see what the shit storm is about.

perhaps it shouldn’t matter Hallowed but damn I’m impressed. Just got caught up with the shit storm and you’ve blown my mind with the progress you’ve made. Courage wolf is your meme. I bow to your will.

xx[/quote]

xoxoxo COURAGE WOLF!

[quote]Dasher wrote:
Re: shit storm.
I wish I had known you at the beginning of your weight loss journey. Your before pictures completely blow my mind. I feel like I have seen dramatic changes in the past 6 months, only to find you are only fine tuning. The insight you have shared on these forums has always been spot on, and now we know you have truly earned it. Hands down, one of the most amazing transformations I have seen. I’m proud of you.

I’m sure this wasn’t The effect homie was trying to create, but whatevs.[/quote]

You are da best boostie in da world! DA WORLD!

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[quote]DixiesFinest wrote:
May your grandmother Rest in Peace, Hallowed. [/quote]

Thanks DF you are a true gentleman.

[quote]Charlie Horse wrote:
Many hugs for your Grandmother passing. Lucky to have a strong woman like that in your life.

Hopefuly you are also feeling a bit relieved after the sama stuff, it can be a relief to just get it all out there.

I’m thinking you will be getting a good nights sleep tonight?

[/quote]

I slept like a baby. I did.

[quote]Patch2 wrote:
Oh Hal, what a lovely tribute to your Grandmother. I’m glad you had someone so strong in your life![/quote]

Me too peaches I’m so glad and grateful thank you.

[quote]ryanbCXG wrote:
Well damn so no fun here. Crazy shit in SAMA

Sorry to here about your loss. From what i have read in the threads you seem to be one strong person and you will pull through and become stronger.

Again very motivation transformation you have had. Very inspirational to say the least. Keep up the great work.[/quote]

Tough as shit yo! Cupcake with a saucy filling? Or something… who knows. I do appreciate it. I have always at least spoken openly about my history even without stats and pictures. Thats posted now and it must be for the best. Thank you.

[quote]scj119 wrote:
You’ve had a rough day. I will allow you to rest your head on my shoulder if you don’t complain when I reach for a little side-boob.[/quote]

Yesterday was cray! What a shitstorm hurricane 2012 has been so far. Please, hold me… comfort me… fondle me.

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[quote]MaximusB wrote:
Le mie condoglanzie per tua nonna, speriamo che lei riposa in pace. [/quote]

Thank you M,
You have always treated me so kindly. I appreciate it.

[quote]Cal Jones wrote:
Hallie, I am a little late but also want to pass on my condolences. The poem is beautiful.[/quote]

I may be reading that poem at her service. It has special meaning to me and to find it with her posessions intended for her funeral makes it only more so.

[quote]Kalle wrote:
Hope you have a better day tomorrow [/quote]

Every day a better day! also, um yayeeeee MANFLESH FUCKYEAH!

[quote]Oleena wrote:

[quote]Kalle wrote:
Hope you have a better day tomorrow [/quote]

x2.[/quote]

Little Miss Know it all! No really, you WERE RIGHT!

[quote]mom-in-MD wrote:
more (((HUGS)))

[/quote]

I love your hugs. You are sweet and strong. Feminine and Fearless. Everything a woman should be. Thank you.

[quote]wiggles wrote:
Condolences on your Grandmother. That’s always tough.

But congratulations on your progress. Really. That is a true reason to use “epic transformation.” Most impressive.

Hope today is a better day for ya.[/quote]

Always a better day. Yeah, I did a not too shabby job I guess… it was just one day at a time really. How we all do. PR to PR is how we live our lives.

[quote]Spock81 wrote:
I was going to send ya a PM making sure you were doin’ alright, but you’re tough as shit (and probably overloaded with pm’s at the moment) so I decided to just pop back into your log.

TODAY IS A NEW DAY, so kick it’s ass!! [/quote]

Litte sweetheart! Thank you.

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REGARDING THE SHITSTORM IN SAMA

Fin.

Hip Scar posted his apology in the Hallowed Petition thread. I believe it was an apology to Catnip and Hallowed Both.

Hallowed and Catnip have addressed this directly to each other.

I have apologized to Catnip in SAMA and in Private Message and I do so again here. I am truly sorry for my part in this. I know what I did wrong and I regret any injury she has suffered from me. I have learned at least one million lessons from this and will do everything in my power to not be such a fool again. It was a shitstorm and a wretched experience. I am beyond grateful that it is finally fucking OVER.

T-Nation and Hip Scar can rest assured that Catnip and Hallowed will continue to communicate openly and truthfuly as much or as is needed or desired by Catnip.

Catnip has graciously agreed to continue her postings and presence on TNation in the Indigo logs and live spill where she will find the most useful support for her goals.

Hip Scar has agreed to keep his continued postings and presence on TNation in the Indigo logs and live spill.

All is forgiven.

Fin.

425

My condolences Hallowed.

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Hallowed I have a question that you are perhaps the best person to ask (if anyone else has advice, please weigh in)

I have a friend (female) who was super lively, party-girl outgoing type in College, and was in very good shape. Judging by facebook pics I would say she’s gained close to 100lbs since then (at least 80 of which came in the last year to year and half since I last saw her). She is constantly talking about sleep, being tired, and posting pics of her energy drinks at work - we are still pretty close, and talk on email all the time but don’t live near each other so I don’t see her often.

Anywho, I have politely suggested thyroid as a potential problem, obvious problem is obvious, but her doc says she’s fine because her TSH is in range (she said it was 3-something which is certainly not fine). I know plenty about thyroid but I do NOT know how to help someone realize that their doctor is not infallible. She won’t trust a math major over her doc.

I just want her to be happy and full of energy again. How do I steer her towards the light and convince her that her doc is wrong? Maybe just send her a bunch of websites and hope she reads them?

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^Post may have been more suited to PM but since it’s more about how to help nudge a friend in the right direction thought it might be better here.

What made me think of it was your pic in SAMA. Basically the one Hip posted of you looks like the most recent one I’ve seen of her, the similarity was eerie. I don’t mean to hijack your log and make it about me but I don’t have any friends who have such a personal experience with this issue to turn to.

428

[quote]scj119 wrote:
Hallowed I have a question that you are perhaps the best person to ask (if anyone else has advice, please weigh in)

I have a friend (female) who was super lively, party-girl outgoing type in College, and was in very good shape. Judging by facebook pics I would say she’s gained close to 100lbs since then (at least 80 of which came in the last year to year and half since I last saw her). She is constantly talking about sleep, being tired, and posting pics of her energy drinks at work - we are still pretty close, and talk on email all the time but don’t live near each other so I don’t see her often.

Anywho, I have politely suggested thyroid as a potential problem, obvious problem is obvious, but her doc says she’s fine because her TSH is in range (she said it was 3-something which is certainly not fine). I know plenty about thyroid but I do NOT know how to help someone realize that their doctor is not infallible. She won’t trust a math major over her doc.

I just want her to be happy and full of energy again. How do I steer her towards the light and convince her that her doc is wrong? Maybe just send her a bunch of websites and hope she reads them?

edit: It gets better, her doc diagnosed her with “Chronic Fatigue Syndrome”. He should be sued for malpractice[/quote]

It is hard to help someone against their will. I dealt with this when I got sober and my BFF was still drinking. I was advised at the time to just be open and honest about what I was going through and what was working for me. My girl did get sober just one year later and still is to this day (yay!) The websites can be overwhelming even when someone is intent on getting help. There are some AMAZING handouts on Holtorf Medical’s website that I think explain things in the best way.

Download the one that is called “Fatigued, Depressed, Difficulty Losing Weight” and the one called “Been Told Your Thyroid is Normal?” they are in the handouts section of the Holtorf website. I also always send people to stopthethyroidmadness.com It is a great site because of its ANGRY attitude. I mean really doctors, WTF!? How dare you dispense such fucking shitty treatment to so many women!

If it were my friend I would indeed make sure I had clearly and honestly and directly told her exactly why I am concerned, exactly what I believe is wrong, exactly what I wish for her to do to help herself, and exactly what my own experiences were/are/have been.

No one needs to live like that anymore. No one.

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WHAT THE FUCK is going on in here?

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stopthethyroidmadness is a good site but my only complaint is it directs you towards armour and dessicated thyroid no matter what your problems. Some problems are better treated with t3-only or t4-only.

But it’s a good place to start. Also I will check out Holtorf.

Thank you.

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[quote]scj119 wrote:
^Post may have been more suited to PM but since it’s more about how to help nudge a friend in the right direction thought it might be better here.

What made me think of it was your pic in SAMA. Basically the one Hip posted of you looks like the most recent one I’ve seen of her, the similarity was eerie. I don’t mean to hijack your log and make it about me but I don’t have any friends who have such a personal experience with this issue to turn to.[/quote]

No apology needed! I really have nothing to hide. One thing you will notice in that picture and something I have pointed out to women I have shared that picture with is what happened to my hair. Almost half the hair completely fell out. THAT LOOK that look that unbelievably thin hair is the look of Hypothyroidism. I could spot it a mile away and that is maybe what you recognized.

When I first visited Dr. Camilleri my original physician at Holtorf I watched him looking at me. His eyes kept going to my hair, then to the base of my throat (My thyroid was horribly enlarged) then to my skin (SO DRY YOUR SKIN GETS SO FUCKING DRY WITH HYPO) then back to my hair. That was really all he needed to do to diagnose me. OF COURSE he ran 3k worth of blood tests… but that LOOK is hypo if your friend looks like that, hypo is probably what is wrong.

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[quote]Hallowed wrote:

[quote]scj119 wrote:
^Post may have been more suited to PM but since it’s more about how to help nudge a friend in the right direction thought it might be better here.

What made me think of it was your pic in SAMA. Basically the one Hip posted of you looks like the most recent one I’ve seen of her, the similarity was eerie. I don’t mean to hijack your log and make it about me but I don’t have any friends who have such a personal experience with this issue to turn to.[/quote]

No apology needed! I really have nothing to hide. One thing you will notice in that picture and something I have pointed out to women I have shared that picture with is what happened to my hair. Almost half the hair completely fell out. THAT LOOK that look that unbelievably thin hair is the look of Hypothyroidism. I could spot it a mile away and that is maybe what you recognized.

When I first visited Dr. Camilleri my original physician at Holtorf I watched him looking at me. His eyes kept going to my hair, then to the base of my throat (My thyroid was horribly enlarged) then to my skin (SO DRY YOUR SKIN GETS SO FUCKING DRY WITH HYPO) then back to my hair. That was really all he needed to do to diagnose me. OF COURSE he ran 3k worth of blood tests… but that LOOK is hypo if your friend looks like that, hypo is probably what is wrong.[/quote]

Thanks again… I’ll ask her about her skin/hair, she’d be honest.

hijack over now more nudes plz.

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Amazing and inspirational transformation, Hallowed. I came across this in the cluster of SAMA, but I will be following along here now. Very awesome. Your transformation is a testament to will and determination. Very awesome! Keep up the good work.

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I had absolutely no idea, you’re fucking brilliant.

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Hallowed you gives me hope and velly many happies!!!

<3

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Hey Hal, since some of us do not go to SAMA would you post the pictures here? As a former fat guy of 305 who dropped a ton of weight I always admire other people who have achieved these goals.

I will pray for you about your grandmother, God Bless.

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[quote]GuerillaZen wrote:
Amazing and inspirational transformation, Hallowed. I came across this in the cluster of SAMA, but I will be following along here now. Very awesome. Your transformation is a testament to will and determination. Very awesome! Keep up the good work.[/quote]

Thank you so much. Nowhere close to done. Going for Superhero for sure. I reached a scale weight that I would have only dreamed of years ago. for so long I just wanted to be 199. I wrote to my sister once “I just want to be 199 is that too much to ask?”. So anyways I reached a very low scale weight for me and realized I needed more muscle. I intentionally gained weight. The irony is epic.

[quote]pushmepullme wrote:
I had absolutely no idea, you’re fucking brilliant.[/quote]

Gawd haven’t I told you? Yeah when I write things like “I used to be super fat” I am hella srs!

[quote]mom-in-MD wrote:
Hallowed you gives me hope and velly many happies!!!

<3[/quote]

Right back at you MILFkins.

[quote]Derek542 wrote:
Hey Hal, since some of us do not go to SAMA would you post the pictures here? As a former fat guy of 305 who dropped a ton of weight I always admire other people who have achieved these goals.

I will pray for you about your grandmother, God Bless. [/quote]

Oh WTF why not. I will post this one it was my very fattest my Brother’s wedding 07/07/07. Somewhere a bit north of 260LBS IIRC. The other one he posted has me holding something recovery related and I don’t think that should be broadcast further than it already has been.

I had no awareness at the time this picture was taken that I was indeed that size. Not a clue. I never once felt anywhere close to that. The mind is amazing. I still don’t recognize this person as myself. strange. Um, this one might have some shit written on it when I sent it to someone (NOT HIPSCAR) oh wait, no it doesnt. Here it is my before picture.

IDK maybe this was supposed to hurt my feelings or humiliate me… I guess thats not how I feel though I must be honest and say that it does hurt me to see this. Not sure why that is. It just makes me sad.

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Here is a side by side that I posted on lowcarbfriends. The pic on the right I think I weighted about 175 it is a full length pic that I posted in the Hallowed Petition V1 thread at some point in my early days here.

Right now I weigh about 150 and have been as low as 137. THOSE weights are WELL DOCUMENTED in my logs here in PW. I have lots of pictures in my hub also which is once again open to the public and everyone.

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As someone who has been there Hal, you have done an outstanding job. Keep up the great work. You have done what very, very, very few people can do, you changed your life.

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Big or small, you’re gorgeous on the inside & it exudes like the sun.