Favourite Quote

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Hallowed wrote:
“I warn you, if you bore me, I shall take my revenge.” - J.R.R.Tolkien

Tis brill![/quote]

What about this? Allegedly your favorite post ever on this site:

“No one will ever be able to properly describe the eternal pessimism and finely-honed sense of doom that Giants fans carry around their neck like a millstone, day in and day out. These playoff runs they occasionally go on are nothing more than the last few steps at the top of Sisyphus’ hill. The generally poor Bay Area sports scene the last couple years only enhances the perception amongst Giants fans that each summer is a different Greek tragedy that we are forced to endure in perpetuity.”

-DB Cooper[/quote]

Thats kind of short winded for you DB, you okay? [/quote]

It was just a short excerpt from a long dissertation on the psychological effects of prolonged suffering due to a lack of success on the part of one’s favorite sports team. I appreciate you asking how I am though. I’m doing well in general, although lately I’ve become overwhelmed by extreme feelings of social anxiety and an unbending desire to be by myself. I don’t know why this is or how to end these feelings, and this worries me. Several times in the last couple weeks I’ve gone out with friends and been bombarded with this heavy, crippling need to just LEAVE wherever it is that I’m at and go home and lock myself in my room where I can avoid all human contact. I’m serious. I went to a sports bar with some friends to watch football on Sunday morning and after being there for maybe five minutes I got up and left. I didn’t say anything to my friends other than “I’ve gotta get here. Later.” I walked home even though I drove to the bar and I took a rather circuitous route so as to avoid any and all confrontations with other people. The flip side of this coin is that in the rare moments when I am not overcome by panic and paranoia and I manage to remain in a social setting with other humans for more than a few minutes, I have this perverted need to dominate conversations. I can barely contain myself when someone else is speaking and when people stop for a breath before resuming whatever sort of drivel it is that’s babbling out of their mouth I seiz this opportunity to grab the conversation and steer it in whatever direction it is that I want it to go. I routinely speak right over other people as if they aren’t even there and, although I try not to let other people catch on about this, I have a hard time hiding the fact that I absolute loathe any conversation, or any human interaction in general, in which I am not the center of attention. I It’s weird, really. But it makes sense on some sort of preternatural level that I am only now coming to grips with. You see, it seems to me that I’ve subconsciously developed this hatred of mankind, a sort of misanthropic attitude whose roots are planted firmly in my perpetually-inflated sense of self. Basically, I’ve determined that humanity has nothing to offer me whatsoever and that if I am going to engage with humanity it will only be on my terms, meaning that any communication between myself and humans boils down to me speaking and everyone listening, because the reality is that no one has anything to say of any import at all and I refuse to participate in this cheap charade in which we pretend to give a FUCK about what anyone says out of some twisted sense of decency and politeness. The bottom line is that if I have to listen to any human voices they will either be my own voice or the voice of someone showering me with praise and extolling all of my virtues (an embarrassment of riches, I admit). And because of this refusal to listen to anything but this, because to listen to anything else is a waste of time, I repeatedly find myself alone. And this brutal, unflinching reality saddens me. Deeply. Perhaps you could send me naked pictures of your wife and/or daughters?[/quote]

Hey man, You wanna be facebook friends?

[quote]Hallowed wrote:

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Hallowed wrote:
“I warn you, if you bore me, I shall take my revenge.” - J.R.R.Tolkien

Tis brill![/quote]

What about this? Allegedly your favorite post ever on this site:

“No one will ever be able to properly describe the eternal pessimism and finely-honed sense of doom that Giants fans carry around their neck like a millstone, day in and day out. These playoff runs they occasionally go on are nothing more than the last few steps at the top of Sisyphus’ hill. The generally poor Bay Area sports scene the last couple years only enhances the perception amongst Giants fans that each summer is a different Greek tragedy that we are forced to endure in perpetuity.”

-DB Cooper[/quote]

That IS my favorite written post ever on this site EVAH.
True.

You only bore me in opposite universe.
[/quote]

What sort of cryptic meaning does “you only bore me in opposite universe” have? What are you trying to say Hallowed? That my well-fortified argument about Barry Bonds in the MLB thread bored you?

And skyzyks, fuck off and DIE. If you think for one second that I want you for a fucking Facebook friend you’re even more bloated by your hubris than even I am. You fucking degenerate megalomaniac, what makes you think I want ANYTHING to do with you? I even rejected a friend request from my own mother!

“I feel sorry for people who don’t drink, when they wake up in the morning, thats as good as they’re going to feel all day”

Frank Sinatra~

[quote]Edgy wrote:
“I feel sorry for people who don’t drink, when they wake up in the morning, thats as good as they’re going to feel all day”

Frank Sinatra~[/quote]

Tell Frank that’s called a hangover.

" the people who get out of this world are the people are the people that get up and look for the circumstances they want and if they cant find them, make them. Well is pretty apparent isnt it, we become what we think about. It stands to reason that a person whose thinking about a definite and worthwhile goal is going to reach it because thats what hes thinking about and we become what we think about. Conversly the man who has no goal, who doesnt know where he is going, his thoughts must therefore be thoughts of confusion, anxiety and fear and worry. He becomes what he thinks about. His life becomes one of frustration, fear, anxiety and worry. If he thinks about nothing, he will become nothing"

“I used to give a fuck”

DB Cooper~

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Hallowed wrote:
“I warn you, if you bore me, I shall take my revenge.” - J.R.R.Tolkien

Tis brill![/quote]

What about this? Allegedly your favorite post ever on this site:

“No one will ever be able to properly describe the eternal pessimism and finely-honed sense of doom that Giants fans carry around their neck like a millstone, day in and day out. These playoff runs they occasionally go on are nothing more than the last few steps at the top of Sisyphus’ hill. The generally poor Bay Area sports scene the last couple years only enhances the perception amongst Giants fans that each summer is a different Greek tragedy that we are forced to endure in perpetuity.”

-DB Cooper[/quote]

Thats kind of short winded for you DB, you okay? [/quote]

It was just a short excerpt from a long dissertation on the psychological effects of prolonged suffering due to a lack of success on the part of one’s favorite sports team. I appreciate you asking how I am though. I’m doing well in general, although lately I’ve become overwhelmed by extreme feelings of social anxiety and an unbending desire to be by myself. I don’t know why this is or how to end these feelings, and this worries me. Several times in the last couple weeks I’ve gone out with friends and been bombarded with this heavy, crippling need to just LEAVE wherever it is that I’m at and go home and lock myself in my room where I can avoid all human contact. I’m serious. I went to a sports bar with some friends to watch football on Sunday morning and after being there for maybe five minutes I got up and left. I didn’t say anything to my friends other than “I’ve gotta get here. Later.” I walked home even though I drove to the bar and I took a rather circuitous route so as to avoid any and all confrontations with other people. The flip side of this coin is that in the rare moments when I am not overcome by panic and paranoia and I manage to remain in a social setting with other humans for more than a few minutes, I have this perverted need to dominate conversations. I can barely contain myself when someone else is speaking and when people stop for a breath before resuming whatever sort of drivel it is that’s babbling out of their mouth I seiz this opportunity to grab the conversation and steer it in whatever direction it is that I want it to go. I routinely speak right over other people as if they aren’t even there and, although I try not to let other people catch on about this, I have a hard time hiding the fact that I absolute loathe any conversation, or any human interaction in general, in which I am not the center of attention. I It’s weird, really. But it makes sense on some sort of preternatural level that I am only now coming to grips with. You see, it seems to me that I’ve subconsciously developed this hatred of mankind, a sort of misanthropic attitude whose roots are planted firmly in my perpetually-inflated sense of self. Basically, I’ve determined that humanity has nothing to offer me whatsoever and that if I am going to engage with humanity it will only be on my terms, meaning that any communication between myself and humans boils down to me speaking and everyone listening, because the reality is that no one has anything to say of any import at all and I refuse to participate in this cheap charade in which we pretend to give a FUCK about what anyone says out of some twisted sense of decency and politeness. The bottom line is that if I have to listen to any human voices they will either be my own voice or the voice of someone showering me with praise and extolling all of my virtues (an embarrassment of riches, I admit). And because of this refusal to listen to anything but this, because to listen to anything else is a waste of time, I repeatedly find myself alone. And this brutal, unflinching reality saddens me. Deeply. Perhaps you could send me naked pictures of your wife and/or daughters?[/quote]

I could send the pictures but I think you need a hug instead.

So when are you going to write a book?

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Hallowed wrote:

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Hallowed wrote:
“I warn you, if you bore me, I shall take my revenge.” - J.R.R.Tolkien

Tis brill![/quote]

What about this? Allegedly your favorite post ever on this site:

“No one will ever be able to properly describe the eternal pessimism and finely-honed sense of doom that Giants fans carry around their neck like a millstone, day in and day out. These playoff runs they occasionally go on are nothing more than the last few steps at the top of Sisyphus’ hill. The generally poor Bay Area sports scene the last couple years only enhances the perception amongst Giants fans that each summer is a different Greek tragedy that we are forced to endure in perpetuity.”

-DB Cooper[/quote]

That IS my favorite written post ever on this site EVAH.
True.

You only bore me in opposite universe.
[/quote]

What sort of cryptic meaning does “you only bore me in opposite universe” have? What are you trying to say Hallowed? That my well-fortified argument about Barry Bonds in the MLB thread bored you?

And skyzyks, fuck off and DIE. If you think for one second that I want you for a fucking Facebook friend you’re even more bloated by your hubris than even I am. You fucking degenerate megalomaniac, what makes you think I want ANYTHING to do with you? I even rejected a friend request from my own mother! [/quote]

Well Coop, it means: YOU NEVER FUCKING BORE ME.
It comes with a hug too.

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

And skyzyks, fuck off and DIE. If you think for one second that I want you for a fucking Facebook friend you’re even more bloated by your hubris than even I am. You fucking degenerate megalomaniac, what makes you think I want ANYTHING to do with you? I even rejected a friend request from my own mother! [/quote]

Now there is the DB we have all come to know and love!

Nothing to worry about Derek, he’s fine.

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Hallowed wrote:
“I warn you, if you bore me, I shall take my revenge.” - J.R.R.Tolkien

Tis brill![/quote]

What about this? Allegedly your favorite post ever on this site:

“No one will ever be able to properly describe the eternal pessimism and finely-honed sense of doom that Giants fans carry around their neck like a millstone, day in and day out. These playoff runs they occasionally go on are nothing more than the last few steps at the top of Sisyphus’ hill. The generally poor Bay Area sports scene the last couple years only enhances the perception amongst Giants fans that each summer is a different Greek tragedy that we are forced to endure in perpetuity.”

-DB Cooper[/quote]

Thats kind of short winded for you DB, you okay? [/quote]

It was just a short excerpt from a long dissertation on the psychological effects of prolonged suffering due to a lack of success on the part of one’s favorite sports team. I appreciate you asking how I am though. I’m doing well in general, although lately I’ve become overwhelmed by extreme feelings of social anxiety and an unbending desire to be by myself. I don’t know why this is or how to end these feelings, and this worries me. Several times in the last couple weeks I’ve gone out with friends and been bombarded with this heavy, crippling need to just LEAVE wherever it is that I’m at and go home and lock myself in my room where I can avoid all human contact. I’m serious. I went to a sports bar with some friends to watch football on Sunday morning and after being there for maybe five minutes I got up and left. I didn’t say anything to my friends other than “I’ve gotta get here. Later.” I walked home even though I drove to the bar and I took a rather circuitous route so as to avoid any and all confrontations with other people. The flip side of this coin is that in the rare moments when I am not overcome by panic and paranoia and I manage to remain in a social setting with other humans for more than a few minutes, I have this perverted need to dominate conversations. I can barely contain myself when someone else is speaking and when people stop for a breath before resuming whatever sort of drivel it is that’s babbling out of their mouth I seiz this opportunity to grab the conversation and steer it in whatever direction it is that I want it to go. I routinely speak right over other people as if they aren’t even there and, although I try not to let other people catch on about this, I have a hard time hiding the fact that I absolute loathe any conversation, or any human interaction in general, in which I am not the center of attention. I It’s weird, really. But it makes sense on some sort of preternatural level that I am only now coming to grips with. You see, it seems to me that I’ve subconsciously developed this hatred of mankind, a sort of misanthropic attitude whose roots are planted firmly in my perpetually-inflated sense of self. Basically, I’ve determined that humanity has nothing to offer me whatsoever and that if I am going to engage with humanity it will only be on my terms, meaning that any communication between myself and humans boils down to me speaking and everyone listening, because the reality is that no one has anything to say of any import at all and I refuse to participate in this cheap charade in which we pretend to give a FUCK about what anyone says out of some twisted sense of decency and politeness. The bottom line is that if I have to listen to any human voices they will either be my own voice or the voice of someone showering me with praise and extolling all of my virtues (an embarrassment of riches, I admit). And because of this refusal to listen to anything but this, because to listen to anything else is a waste of time, I repeatedly find myself alone. And this brutal, unflinching reality saddens me. Deeply. Perhaps you could send me naked pictures of your wife and/or daughters?[/quote]

I could send the pictures but I think you need a hug instead.

So when are you going to write a book?[/quote]

HE JUST DID.

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.”

Teddy Roosevelt

[quote]Vicomte wrote:

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Hallowed wrote:
“I warn you, if you bore me, I shall take my revenge.” - J.R.R.Tolkien

Tis brill![/quote]

What about this? Allegedly your favorite post ever on this site:

“No one will ever be able to properly describe the eternal pessimism and finely-honed sense of doom that Giants fans carry around their neck like a millstone, day in and day out. These playoff runs they occasionally go on are nothing more than the last few steps at the top of Sisyphus’ hill. The generally poor Bay Area sports scene the last couple years only enhances the perception amongst Giants fans that each summer is a different Greek tragedy that we are forced to endure in perpetuity.”

-DB Cooper[/quote]

Thats kind of short winded for you DB, you okay? [/quote]

It was just a short excerpt from a long dissertation on the psychological effects of prolonged suffering due to a lack of success on the part of one’s favorite sports team. I appreciate you asking how I am though. I’m doing well in general, although lately I’ve become overwhelmed by extreme feelings of social anxiety and an unbending desire to be by myself. I don’t know why this is or how to end these feelings, and this worries me. Several times in the last couple weeks I’ve gone out with friends and been bombarded with this heavy, crippling need to just LEAVE wherever it is that I’m at and go home and lock myself in my room where I can avoid all human contact. I’m serious. I went to a sports bar with some friends to watch football on Sunday morning and after being there for maybe five minutes I got up and left. I didn’t say anything to my friends other than “I’ve gotta get here. Later.” I walked home even though I drove to the bar and I took a rather circuitous route so as to avoid any and all confrontations with other people. The flip side of this coin is that in the rare moments when I am not overcome by panic and paranoia and I manage to remain in a social setting with other humans for more than a few minutes, I have this perverted need to dominate conversations. I can barely contain myself when someone else is speaking and when people stop for a breath before resuming whatever sort of drivel it is that’s babbling out of their mouth I seiz this opportunity to grab the conversation and steer it in whatever direction it is that I want it to go. I routinely speak right over other people as if they aren’t even there and, although I try not to let other people catch on about this, I have a hard time hiding the fact that I absolute loathe any conversation, or any human interaction in general, in which I am not the center of attention. I It’s weird, really. But it makes sense on some sort of preternatural level that I am only now coming to grips with. You see, it seems to me that I’ve subconsciously developed this hatred of mankind, a sort of misanthropic attitude whose roots are planted firmly in my perpetually-inflated sense of self. Basically, I’ve determined that humanity has nothing to offer me whatsoever and that if I am going to engage with humanity it will only be on my terms, meaning that any communication between myself and humans boils down to me speaking and everyone listening, because the reality is that no one has anything to say of any import at all and I refuse to participate in this cheap charade in which we pretend to give a FUCK about what anyone says out of some twisted sense of decency and politeness. The bottom line is that if I have to listen to any human voices they will either be my own voice or the voice of someone showering me with praise and extolling all of my virtues (an embarrassment of riches, I admit). And because of this refusal to listen to anything but this, because to listen to anything else is a waste of time, I repeatedly find myself alone. And this brutal, unflinching reality saddens me. Deeply. Perhaps you could send me naked pictures of your wife and/or daughters?[/quote]

I could send the pictures but I think you need a hug instead.

So when are you going to write a book?[/quote]

HE JUST DID.[/quote]

I’ve already written it. This is like the epilogue to “Inside DB Cooper’s Brain: Profiles in Paranoia, Volume III”. The entirety of the series is just the totality of everything I’ve written on this site, which is probably legitimately long enough to be a book of significant length.

Now, the message behind the book may be completely indiscernible to even myself, but I am an artist, and artists always have Something To Say, so I suppose I’ve literally written an entire book here. If you had the right sense of comedic timing, dynamics and rhythm, you could probably cut and paste everything I’ve written here with a little creativity and ACTUALLY write a book. I’ll give whoever can do this in a satisfactory manner top billing on the cover of my book (which will be the next great American Novel) as the editor behind the madness and mundacity.

I’ve always wanted to write a book about a drunkard professional baseball player so I can name the book “The Bases Were Loaded and So Was I.”

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Vicomte wrote:

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Hallowed wrote:
“I warn you, if you bore me, I shall take my revenge.” - J.R.R.Tolkien

Tis brill![/quote]

What about this? Allegedly your favorite post ever on this site:

“No one will ever be able to properly describe the eternal pessimism and finely-honed sense of doom that Giants fans carry around their neck like a millstone, day in and day out. These playoff runs they occasionally go on are nothing more than the last few steps at the top of Sisyphus’ hill. The generally poor Bay Area sports scene the last couple years only enhances the perception amongst Giants fans that each summer is a different Greek tragedy that we are forced to endure in perpetuity.”

-DB Cooper[/quote]

Thats kind of short winded for you DB, you okay? [/quote]

It was just a short excerpt from a long dissertation on the psychological effects of prolonged suffering due to a lack of success on the part of one’s favorite sports team. I appreciate you asking how I am though. I’m doing well in general, although lately I’ve become overwhelmed by extreme feelings of social anxiety and an unbending desire to be by myself. I don’t know why this is or how to end these feelings, and this worries me. Several times in the last couple weeks I’ve gone out with friends and been bombarded with this heavy, crippling need to just LEAVE wherever it is that I’m at and go home and lock myself in my room where I can avoid all human contact. I’m serious. I went to a sports bar with some friends to watch football on Sunday morning and after being there for maybe five minutes I got up and left. I didn’t say anything to my friends other than “I’ve gotta get here. Later.” I walked home even though I drove to the bar and I took a rather circuitous route so as to avoid any and all confrontations with other people. The flip side of this coin is that in the rare moments when I am not overcome by panic and paranoia and I manage to remain in a social setting with other humans for more than a few minutes, I have this perverted need to dominate conversations. I can barely contain myself when someone else is speaking and when people stop for a breath before resuming whatever sort of drivel it is that’s babbling out of their mouth I seiz this opportunity to grab the conversation and steer it in whatever direction it is that I want it to go. I routinely speak right over other people as if they aren’t even there and, although I try not to let other people catch on about this, I have a hard time hiding the fact that I absolute loathe any conversation, or any human interaction in general, in which I am not the center of attention. I It’s weird, really. But it makes sense on some sort of preternatural level that I am only now coming to grips with. You see, it seems to me that I’ve subconsciously developed this hatred of mankind, a sort of misanthropic attitude whose roots are planted firmly in my perpetually-inflated sense of self. Basically, I’ve determined that humanity has nothing to offer me whatsoever and that if I am going to engage with humanity it will only be on my terms, meaning that any communication between myself and humans boils down to me speaking and everyone listening, because the reality is that no one has anything to say of any import at all and I refuse to participate in this cheap charade in which we pretend to give a FUCK about what anyone says out of some twisted sense of decency and politeness. The bottom line is that if I have to listen to any human voices they will either be my own voice or the voice of someone showering me with praise and extolling all of my virtues (an embarrassment of riches, I admit). And because of this refusal to listen to anything but this, because to listen to anything else is a waste of time, I repeatedly find myself alone. And this brutal, unflinching reality saddens me. Deeply. Perhaps you could send me naked pictures of your wife and/or daughters?[/quote]

I could send the pictures but I think you need a hug instead.

So when are you going to write a book?[/quote]

HE JUST DID.[/quote]

I’ve already written it. This is like the epilogue to “Inside DB Cooper’s Brain: Profiles in Paranoia, Volume III”. The entirety of the series is just the totality of everything I’ve written on this site, which is probably legitimately long enough to be a book of significant length.

Now, the message behind the book may be completely indiscernible to even myself, but I am an artist, and artists always have Something To Say, so I suppose I’ve literally written an entire book here. If you had the right sense of comedic timing, dynamics and rhythm, you could probably cut and paste everything I’ve written here with a little creativity and ACTUALLY write a book. I’ll give whoever can do this in a satisfactory manner top billing on the cover of my book (which will be the next great American Novel) as the editor behind the madness and mundacity.

I’ve always wanted to write a book about a drunkard professional baseball player so I can name the book “The Bases Were Loaded and So Was I.” [/quote]

I’ve always wanted to write a book about a meth-addicted prostitute so I can name the book "I Sucked Dicks For Money For Drugs’.

Great minds…

[quote]Vicomte wrote:

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Vicomte wrote:

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Hallowed wrote:
“I warn you, if you bore me, I shall take my revenge.” - J.R.R.Tolkien

Tis brill![/quote]

What about this? Allegedly your favorite post ever on this site:

“No one will ever be able to properly describe the eternal pessimism and finely-honed sense of doom that Giants fans carry around their neck like a millstone, day in and day out. These playoff runs they occasionally go on are nothing more than the last few steps at the top of Sisyphus’ hill. The generally poor Bay Area sports scene the last couple years only enhances the perception amongst Giants fans that each summer is a different Greek tragedy that we are forced to endure in perpetuity.”

-DB Cooper[/quote]

Thats kind of short winded for you DB, you okay? [/quote]

It was just a short excerpt from a long dissertation on the psychological effects of prolonged suffering due to a lack of success on the part of one’s favorite sports team. I appreciate you asking how I am though. I’m doing well in general, although lately I’ve become overwhelmed by extreme feelings of social anxiety and an unbending desire to be by myself. I don’t know why this is or how to end these feelings, and this worries me. Several times in the last couple weeks I’ve gone out with friends and been bombarded with this heavy, crippling need to just LEAVE wherever it is that I’m at and go home and lock myself in my room where I can avoid all human contact. I’m serious. I went to a sports bar with some friends to watch football on Sunday morning and after being there for maybe five minutes I got up and left. I didn’t say anything to my friends other than “I’ve gotta get here. Later.” I walked home even though I drove to the bar and I took a rather circuitous route so as to avoid any and all confrontations with other people. The flip side of this coin is that in the rare moments when I am not overcome by panic and paranoia and I manage to remain in a social setting with other humans for more than a few minutes, I have this perverted need to dominate conversations. I can barely contain myself when someone else is speaking and when people stop for a breath before resuming whatever sort of drivel it is that’s babbling out of their mouth I seiz this opportunity to grab the conversation and steer it in whatever direction it is that I want it to go. I routinely speak right over other people as if they aren’t even there and, although I try not to let other people catch on about this, I have a hard time hiding the fact that I absolute loathe any conversation, or any human interaction in general, in which I am not the center of attention. I It’s weird, really. But it makes sense on some sort of preternatural level that I am only now coming to grips with. You see, it seems to me that I’ve subconsciously developed this hatred of mankind, a sort of misanthropic attitude whose roots are planted firmly in my perpetually-inflated sense of self. Basically, I’ve determined that humanity has nothing to offer me whatsoever and that if I am going to engage with humanity it will only be on my terms, meaning that any communication between myself and humans boils down to me speaking and everyone listening, because the reality is that no one has anything to say of any import at all and I refuse to participate in this cheap charade in which we pretend to give a FUCK about what anyone says out of some twisted sense of decency and politeness. The bottom line is that if I have to listen to any human voices they will either be my own voice or the voice of someone showering me with praise and extolling all of my virtues (an embarrassment of riches, I admit). And because of this refusal to listen to anything but this, because to listen to anything else is a waste of time, I repeatedly find myself alone. And this brutal, unflinching reality saddens me. Deeply. Perhaps you could send me naked pictures of your wife and/or daughters?[/quote]

I could send the pictures but I think you need a hug instead.

So when are you going to write a book?[/quote]

HE JUST DID.[/quote]

I’ve already written it. This is like the epilogue to “Inside DB Cooper’s Brain: Profiles in Paranoia, Volume III”. The entirety of the series is just the totality of everything I’ve written on this site, which is probably legitimately long enough to be a book of significant length.

Now, the message behind the book may be completely indiscernible to even myself, but I am an artist, and artists always have Something To Say, so I suppose I’ve literally written an entire book here. If you had the right sense of comedic timing, dynamics and rhythm, you could probably cut and paste everything I’ve written here with a little creativity and ACTUALLY write a book. I’ll give whoever can do this in a satisfactory manner top billing on the cover of my book (which will be the next great American Novel) as the editor behind the madness and mundacity.

I’ve always wanted to write a book about a drunkard professional baseball player so I can name the book “The Bases Were Loaded and So Was I.” [/quote]

I’ve always wanted to write a book about a meth-addicted prostitute so I can name the book "I Sucked Dicks For Money For Drugs’.

Great minds…[/quote]

Or a book about my college days/daze: “The Wait List Was Loaded and My Left Nostril Was Pouring Blood and Six Hours-Old Remnants of Finely-Processed Cocaine, or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Rehab.” Do you like it? I think it would make a good movie too, if I can sell the rights for a high price, a good director comes on board and I have significant input into the screenplay, choreography and soundtrack.

[quote]Edgy wrote:
“I used to give a fuck”

DB Cooper~[/quote]

Have I said this? I don’t remember. But I like it. It’s very…Nietzschean. I’m not much of a nihilist myself, but I like what this quote implies. I take full credit for it. It goes in the Pantheon with some of my other great lines of compartmentalized philosophical rhetoric.

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Vicomte wrote:

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Vicomte wrote:

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Hallowed wrote:
“I warn you, if you bore me, I shall take my revenge.” - J.R.R.Tolkien

Tis brill![/quote]

What about this? Allegedly your favorite post ever on this site:

“No one will ever be able to properly describe the eternal pessimism and finely-honed sense of doom that Giants fans carry around their neck like a millstone, day in and day out. These playoff runs they occasionally go on are nothing more than the last few steps at the top of Sisyphus’ hill. The generally poor Bay Area sports scene the last couple years only enhances the perception amongst Giants fans that each summer is a different Greek tragedy that we are forced to endure in perpetuity.”

-DB Cooper[/quote]

Thats kind of short winded for you DB, you okay? [/quote]

It was just a short excerpt from a long dissertation on the psychological effects of prolonged suffering due to a lack of success on the part of one’s favorite sports team. I appreciate you asking how I am though. I’m doing well in general, although lately I’ve become overwhelmed by extreme feelings of social anxiety and an unbending desire to be by myself. I don’t know why this is or how to end these feelings, and this worries me. Several times in the last couple weeks I’ve gone out with friends and been bombarded with this heavy, crippling need to just LEAVE wherever it is that I’m at and go home and lock myself in my room where I can avoid all human contact. I’m serious. I went to a sports bar with some friends to watch football on Sunday morning and after being there for maybe five minutes I got up and left. I didn’t say anything to my friends other than “I’ve gotta get here. Later.” I walked home even though I drove to the bar and I took a rather circuitous route so as to avoid any and all confrontations with other people. The flip side of this coin is that in the rare moments when I am not overcome by panic and paranoia and I manage to remain in a social setting with other humans for more than a few minutes, I have this perverted need to dominate conversations. I can barely contain myself when someone else is speaking and when people stop for a breath before resuming whatever sort of drivel it is that’s babbling out of their mouth I seiz this opportunity to grab the conversation and steer it in whatever direction it is that I want it to go. I routinely speak right over other people as if they aren’t even there and, although I try not to let other people catch on about this, I have a hard time hiding the fact that I absolute loathe any conversation, or any human interaction in general, in which I am not the center of attention. I It’s weird, really. But it makes sense on some sort of preternatural level that I am only now coming to grips with. You see, it seems to me that I’ve subconsciously developed this hatred of mankind, a sort of misanthropic attitude whose roots are planted firmly in my perpetually-inflated sense of self. Basically, I’ve determined that humanity has nothing to offer me whatsoever and that if I am going to engage with humanity it will only be on my terms, meaning that any communication between myself and humans boils down to me speaking and everyone listening, because the reality is that no one has anything to say of any import at all and I refuse to participate in this cheap charade in which we pretend to give a FUCK about what anyone says out of some twisted sense of decency and politeness. The bottom line is that if I have to listen to any human voices they will either be my own voice or the voice of someone showering me with praise and extolling all of my virtues (an embarrassment of riches, I admit). And because of this refusal to listen to anything but this, because to listen to anything else is a waste of time, I repeatedly find myself alone. And this brutal, unflinching reality saddens me. Deeply. Perhaps you could send me naked pictures of your wife and/or daughters?[/quote]

I could send the pictures but I think you need a hug instead.

So when are you going to write a book?[/quote]

HE JUST DID.[/quote]

I’ve already written it. This is like the epilogue to “Inside DB Cooper’s Brain: Profiles in Paranoia, Volume III”. The entirety of the series is just the totality of everything I’ve written on this site, which is probably legitimately long enough to be a book of significant length.

Now, the message behind the book may be completely indiscernible to even myself, but I am an artist, and artists always have Something To Say, so I suppose I’ve literally written an entire book here. If you had the right sense of comedic timing, dynamics and rhythm, you could probably cut and paste everything I’ve written here with a little creativity and ACTUALLY write a book. I’ll give whoever can do this in a satisfactory manner top billing on the cover of my book (which will be the next great American Novel) as the editor behind the madness and mundacity.

I’ve always wanted to write a book about a drunkard professional baseball player so I can name the book “The Bases Were Loaded and So Was I.” [/quote]

I’ve always wanted to write a book about a meth-addicted prostitute so I can name the book "I Sucked Dicks For Money For Drugs’.

Great minds…[/quote]

Or a book about my college days/daze: “The Wait List Was Loaded and My Left Nostril Was Pouring Blood and Six Hours-Old Remnants of Finely-Processed Cocaine, or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Rehab.” Do you like it? I think it would make a good movie too, if I can sell the rights for a high price, a good director comes on board and I have significant input into the screenplay, choreography and soundtrack.[/quote]

I’ve always wanted to write a book about a futuristic society that believes love is a dangerous addiction and therefore has a vast network of ‘Love Rehabs’.

I’d call it Romancing Oblivion, and the movie will get me laid. Guaranteed.

[quote]Vicomte wrote:

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Vicomte wrote:

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Vicomte wrote:

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Hallowed wrote:
“I warn you, if you bore me, I shall take my revenge.” - J.R.R.Tolkien

Tis brill![/quote]

What about this? Allegedly your favorite post ever on this site:

“No one will ever be able to properly describe the eternal pessimism and finely-honed sense of doom that Giants fans carry around their neck like a millstone, day in and day out. These playoff runs they occasionally go on are nothing more than the last few steps at the top of Sisyphus’ hill. The generally poor Bay Area sports scene the last couple years only enhances the perception amongst Giants fans that each summer is a different Greek tragedy that we are forced to endure in perpetuity.”

-DB Cooper[/quote]

Thats kind of short winded for you DB, you okay? [/quote]

It was just a short excerpt from a long dissertation on the psychological effects of prolonged suffering due to a lack of success on the part of one’s favorite sports team. I appreciate you asking how I am though. I’m doing well in general, although lately I’ve become overwhelmed by extreme feelings of social anxiety and an unbending desire to be by myself. I don’t know why this is or how to end these feelings, and this worries me. Several times in the last couple weeks I’ve gone out with friends and been bombarded with this heavy, crippling need to just LEAVE wherever it is that I’m at and go home and lock myself in my room where I can avoid all human contact. I’m serious. I went to a sports bar with some friends to watch football on Sunday morning and after being there for maybe five minutes I got up and left. I didn’t say anything to my friends other than “I’ve gotta get here. Later.” I walked home even though I drove to the bar and I took a rather circuitous route so as to avoid any and all confrontations with other people. The flip side of this coin is that in the rare moments when I am not overcome by panic and paranoia and I manage to remain in a social setting with other humans for more than a few minutes, I have this perverted need to dominate conversations. I can barely contain myself when someone else is speaking and when people stop for a breath before resuming whatever sort of drivel it is that’s babbling out of their mouth I seiz this opportunity to grab the conversation and steer it in whatever direction it is that I want it to go. I routinely speak right over other people as if they aren’t even there and, although I try not to let other people catch on about this, I have a hard time hiding the fact that I absolute loathe any conversation, or any human interaction in general, in which I am not the center of attention. I It’s weird, really. But it makes sense on some sort of preternatural level that I am only now coming to grips with. You see, it seems to me that I’ve subconsciously developed this hatred of mankind, a sort of misanthropic attitude whose roots are planted firmly in my perpetually-inflated sense of self. Basically, I’ve determined that humanity has nothing to offer me whatsoever and that if I am going to engage with humanity it will only be on my terms, meaning that any communication between myself and humans boils down to me speaking and everyone listening, because the reality is that no one has anything to say of any import at all and I refuse to participate in this cheap charade in which we pretend to give a FUCK about what anyone says out of some twisted sense of decency and politeness. The bottom line is that if I have to listen to any human voices they will either be my own voice or the voice of someone showering me with praise and extolling all of my virtues (an embarrassment of riches, I admit). And because of this refusal to listen to anything but this, because to listen to anything else is a waste of time, I repeatedly find myself alone. And this brutal, unflinching reality saddens me. Deeply. Perhaps you could send me naked pictures of your wife and/or daughters?[/quote]

I could send the pictures but I think you need a hug instead.

So when are you going to write a book?[/quote]

HE JUST DID.[/quote]

I’ve already written it. This is like the epilogue to “Inside DB Cooper’s Brain: Profiles in Paranoia, Volume III”. The entirety of the series is just the totality of everything I’ve written on this site, which is probably legitimately long enough to be a book of significant length.

Now, the message behind the book may be completely indiscernible to even myself, but I am an artist, and artists always have Something To Say, so I suppose I’ve literally written an entire book here. If you had the right sense of comedic timing, dynamics and rhythm, you could probably cut and paste everything I’ve written here with a little creativity and ACTUALLY write a book. I’ll give whoever can do this in a satisfactory manner top billing on the cover of my book (which will be the next great American Novel) as the editor behind the madness and mundacity.

I’ve always wanted to write a book about a drunkard professional baseball player so I can name the book “The Bases Were Loaded and So Was I.” [/quote]

I’ve always wanted to write a book about a meth-addicted prostitute so I can name the book "I Sucked Dicks For Money For Drugs’.

Great minds…[/quote]

Or a book about my college days/daze: “The Wait List Was Loaded and My Left Nostril Was Pouring Blood and Six Hours-Old Remnants of Finely-Processed Cocaine, or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Rehab.” Do you like it? I think it would make a good movie too, if I can sell the rights for a high price, a good director comes on board and I have significant input into the screenplay, choreography and soundtrack.[/quote]

I’ve always wanted to write a book about a futuristic society that believes love is a dangerous addiction and therefore has a vast network of ‘Love Rehabs’.

I’d call it Romancing Oblivion, and the movie will get me laid. Guaranteed.[/quote]

Most definitely. You could make it a real sensual, mysterious, erotic-thriller-type book. A dark cover, maybe all black, with a heavily-shadowed face totally obscured except for brightly-colored women’s (or men’s???) lips. It would become a NY Times Bestseller based largely on the media furor surrounding a very nasty, public boycott of the novel by various women’s rights groups, Oprah, most of the cast of The View and PETA. The NRA stands firmly behind the book.

The film would would have an ensemble cast including Mila Kunis, Jessica Biel, Eva Mendes Kayden Kross (in her big-screen debut!), Michael Douglas, Shirley MacLaine and Jonah Hill. It would make “Basic Instinct” look like a fucking pre-war Disney cartoon! It would even make Kubrick’s “Eyes Wide Shut” look like a goddamned Three’s Company episode! It would be epic, grandiose, decadent, totally over-the-top in true Hollywood fashion.

Michael Bay would be reduced to holding a boom mike on the set of of an independent film in northwestern Canada for the measly salary of $8.00 an hour and a little bit of free heroin if he hangs around after work long enough and he’ll start writing his name in all lower-case letters when you’re through with the greater Los Angeles basin area.

You can just cruise around in your car, completely naked save for a German pith helmet and snowboarding goggles and pull up to little groups of teenaged women and ask which one of them wants to begin the slow, excruciating, dehumanizing slide into drug addiction, sexual promiscuity, failed hopes and dreams and most likely a funeral attended to by their parents. Before they run away, just casually mention that you also wrote the book “Romancing Oblivion” (which, for many of them, was their first introduction to the wide world of non-consensual sex and in many ways may have been at the root of their first few solitary sexual experiences). That’s all it’s going to take for you from now on. Godspeed son.

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]Edgy wrote:
“I used to give a fuck”

DB Cooper~[/quote]

Have I said this? I don’t remember. But I like it. It’s very…Nietzschean. I’m not much of a nihilist myself, but I like what this quote implies. I take full credit for it. It goes in the Pantheon with some of my other great lines of compartmentalized philosophical rhetoric.[/quote]

Truly - this quote came from the great one - I should have added that it was quoted without permission~