Ever Feel Like A Threadkiller? 49

Off Topic
481

[quote]CAP1015 wrote:

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]CAP1015 wrote:

OK Senior, got your message, you are in charge of the interwebz, you can’t see someone making fun of themselves, (see the part about don’t call me son, son) and if that was flipping out, then I didn’t do a good job of making my tone clear…again my fault…you point is clear now, I understand and thank for the education on thread posting, I will go now and lurk and try to learn and maybe come back some day after I have grown.

[/quote]

Dude, don’t act like you didn’t get defensive. I’m not retarded.

Just get over yourself, contribute outside of drooling over the women that post here, and lighten the fuck up, and it’ll be fine.

shit.[/quote]

It always comes down to fat jokes doesn’t it? Lighten up, I see what you did there.

OK, Ok …like the man in orthopedic shoes, I stand corrected, hat in hand…back to lurking, taking my anti-drool medication…moving on…but the fat jokes hurt, like getting beat by the Bills hurt, …just kidding, no disrespect to NEPAT’s, …my team is 0-3 so I got nothing to do but bash on the winners…

seacrest out
[/quote]

I certainly didn’t intend to make a fat joke man. My bad.

I wouldn’t do that, particularly if you’re here trying to change your body comp.

482

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]CAP1015 wrote:

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]CAP1015 wrote:

OK Senior, got your message, you are in charge of the interwebz, you can’t see someone making fun of themselves, (see the part about don’t call me son, son) and if that was flipping out, then I didn’t do a good job of making my tone clear…again my fault…you point is clear now, I understand and thank for the education on thread posting, I will go now and lurk and try to learn and maybe come back some day after I have grown.

[/quote]

Dude, don’t act like you didn’t get defensive. I’m not retarded.

Just get over yourself, contribute outside of drooling over the women that post here, and lighten the fuck up, and it’ll be fine.

shit.[/quote]

It always comes down to fat jokes doesn’t it? Lighten up, I see what you did there.

OK, Ok …like the man in orthopedic shoes, I stand corrected, hat in hand…back to lurking, taking my anti-drool medication…moving on…but the fat jokes hurt, like getting beat by the Bills hurt, …just kidding, no disrespect to NEPAT’s, …my team is 0-3 so I got nothing to do but bash on the winners…

seacrest out
[/quote]

I certainly didn’t intend to make a fat joke man. My bad.

I wouldn’t do that, particularly if you’re here trying to change your body comp.[/quote]

I would. :slight_smile:

483

Cap? Beansie?

((((((((( group hug )))))))))

484

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]Dasher wrote:
I have a friend that’s a gastrointestinologist and one day, she texted me “going to be late, patient swallowed a fork”[/quote]

That somehow seems less exciting than teh crowbar story…

What else has she told you?[/quote]

A crowbar is interesting. I just got to wondering how someone swallows a fork. She said it was tied into an eating disorder. Eating forks sure strikes me as a disorder. Dangerous pica.

I don’t ask about her day much.

485

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]print wrote:
You better check the size on that waistband mister.[/quote]

I’m not going to pretend to know where you’re going with that, lol

But, I’m back down to 240, and all my work pants are 2"+ to big around the waist, but the ass is still sorta tight.

Unlike Tom’s my ass is tight, get it, har har har

This just in, the Shakeweight looks like your jacking someone off, just like Brady. Except he has rings on his fingers while doing it. 3 of em…[/quote]

It’s all good Beansie. I find you to be a extremely good looking & masculine man.

486

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]Dasher wrote:
I have a friend that’s a gastrointestinologist and one day, she texted me “going to be late, patient swallowed a fork”[/quote]

That somehow seems less exciting than teh crowbar story…

What else has she told you?[/quote]

You got to be friends with a colorectal surgeon those are some funny sick motherfuckers. [/quote]

WHo fucking picks that as a career? I am serious. Who spends all that time and money in medical school to dig around in people’s assholes all day?

I mean, thank god someone is that fucked up, but holy shit. Imagine that shit, literally?

487

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]Dasher wrote:
I have a friend that’s a gastrointestinologist and one day, she texted me “going to be late, patient swallowed a fork”[/quote]

That somehow seems less exciting than teh crowbar story…

What else has she told you?[/quote]

You got to be friends with a colorectal surgeon those are some funny sick motherfuckers. [/quote]

WHo fucking picks that as a career? I am serious. Who spends all that time and money in medical school to dig around in people’s assholes all day?

I mean, thank god someone is that fucked up, but holy shit. Imagine that shit, literally?[/quote]

$ Brother that is a very, very specialist type of job. If you could bank $750,000 a year to do it would you?

488

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]CAP1015 wrote:

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]CAP1015 wrote:

OK Senior, got your message, you are in charge of the interwebz, you can’t see someone making fun of themselves, (see the part about don’t call me son, son) and if that was flipping out, then I didn’t do a good job of making my tone clear…again my fault…you point is clear now, I understand and thank for the education on thread posting, I will go now and lurk and try to learn and maybe come back some day after I have grown.

[/quote]

Dude, don’t act like you didn’t get defensive. I’m not retarded.

Just get over yourself, contribute outside of drooling over the women that post here, and lighten the fuck up, and it’ll be fine.

shit.[/quote]

It always comes down to fat jokes doesn’t it? Lighten up, I see what you did there.

OK, Ok …like the man in orthopedic shoes, I stand corrected, hat in hand…back to lurking, taking my anti-drool medication…moving on…but the fat jokes hurt, like getting beat by the Bills hurt, …just kidding, no disrespect to NEPAT’s, …my team is 0-3 so I got nothing to do but bash on the winners…

seacrest out
[/quote]

I certainly didn’t intend to make a fat joke man. My bad.

I wouldn’t do that, particularly if you’re here trying to change your body comp.[/quote]

I keed man…I’m in shape, Round is a shape!..I just bought a new belt and they put cattle on the endangered species list…when I back up I beep…when I wear a white shirt the gang members spray paint graffitti on me…when I go to hug my daughter she starts to orbit…I’ve been hired as a male model…I’m now the before guy in all the weight loss ads…

I was saying that based upon Prints comment about checking your waistline and my avatar…and that I’m the poster boy for “beating anorexia”…

489

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]Dasher wrote:
I have a friend that’s a gastrointestinologist and one day, she texted me “going to be late, patient swallowed a fork”[/quote]

That somehow seems less exciting than teh crowbar story…

What else has she told you?[/quote]

You got to be friends with a colorectal surgeon those are some funny sick motherfuckers. [/quote]

WHo fucking picks that as a career? I am serious. Who spends all that time and money in medical school to dig around in people’s assholes all day?

I mean, thank god someone is that fucked up, but holy shit. Imagine that shit, literally?[/quote]

$ Brother that is a very, very specialist type of job. If you could bank $750,000 a year to do it would you?[/quote]

Shoot, I’d be elbow deep in Beansie’s asshole every day for free if he’d let me.

490

[quote]Edgy wrote:
Cap? Beansie?

((((((((( group hug )))))))))[/quote]

491

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]Dasher wrote:
I have a friend that’s a gastrointestinologist and one day, she texted me “going to be late, patient swallowed a fork”[/quote]

That somehow seems less exciting than teh crowbar story…

What else has she told you?[/quote]

You got to be friends with a colorectal surgeon those are some funny sick motherfuckers. [/quote]

WHo fucking picks that as a career? I am serious. Who spends all that time and money in medical school to dig around in people’s assholes all day?

I mean, thank god someone is that fucked up, but holy shit. Imagine that shit, literally?[/quote]

$ Brother that is a very, very specialist type of job. If you could bank $750,000 a year to do it would you?[/quote]
Shit yes

492

[quote]Dasher wrote:

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]Dasher wrote:
I have a friend that’s a gastrointestinologist and one day, she texted me “going to be late, patient swallowed a fork”[/quote]

That somehow seems less exciting than teh crowbar story…

What else has she told you?[/quote]

A crowbar is interesting. I just got to wondering how someone swallows a fork. She said it was tied into an eating disorder. Eating forks sure strikes me as a disorder. Dangerous pica.

I don’t ask about her day much.[/quote]

I’m sure she confused the fork for a chicken finger. Good thing she doesn’t eat with her hands.

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

$ Brother that is a very, very specialist type of job. If you could bank $750,000 a year to do it would you?[/quote]

750k a year to dig in someone’s smelly diseased anus day in and day out?

Because lets face it, no one is coming to see you for “preventive maintenance” they come see you when shit is coming out all purple and full of maggots.

I just don’t know if that is enough money man…

493

[quote]inkaddict wrote:

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]Dasher wrote:
I have a friend that’s a gastrointestinologist and one day, she texted me “going to be late, patient swallowed a fork”[/quote]

That somehow seems less exciting than teh crowbar story…

What else has she told you?[/quote]

You got to be friends with a colorectal surgeon those are some funny sick motherfuckers. [/quote]

WHo fucking picks that as a career? I am serious. Who spends all that time and money in medical school to dig around in people’s assholes all day?

I mean, thank god someone is that fucked up, but holy shit. Imagine that shit, literally?[/quote]

$ Brother that is a very, very specialist type of job. If you could bank $750,000 a year to do it would you?[/quote]
Shit yes[/quote]

Plus like that Sinfeld episode as the assman you are the life of the party.

494

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]Dasher wrote:

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]Dasher wrote:
I have a friend that’s a gastrointestinologist and one day, she texted me “going to be late, patient swallowed a fork”[/quote]

That somehow seems less exciting than teh crowbar story…

What else has she told you?[/quote]

A crowbar is interesting. I just got to wondering how someone swallows a fork. She said it was tied into an eating disorder. Eating forks sure strikes me as a disorder. Dangerous pica.

I don’t ask about her day much.[/quote]

I’m sure she confused the fork for a chicken finger. Good thing she doesn’t eat with her hands.

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

$ Brother that is a very, very specialist type of job. If you could bank $750,000 a year to do it would you?[/quote]

750k a year to dig in someone’s smelly diseased anus day in and day out?

Because lets face it, no one is coming to see you for “preventive maintenance” they come see you when shit is coming out all purple and full of maggots.

I just don’t know if that is enough money man…[/quote]

hahahahaahahahaha

Okay what about a Gyno Dr? Could you look at Vajajay all day?

And it would probably be on lady’s like the ones at the top of this page.

495

496

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

Okay what about a Gyno Dr? Could you look at Vajajay all day?

And it would probably be on lady’s like the ones at the top of this page.[/quote]

Fuck no I wouldn’t, not in a million years. Because of that fact.

For every healthy one, their will be 3 that smell like the Tuna I had for lunch. And for every hot chick, there will be 16 that make me vomit in my mouth at the sight of their snarled up lips. Gunts all hanging in my way… ugh

“Excuse me maam, can you hold you disgusting gut up while I scope this black stained, bacteria ridden filth mound you call a “she-penis” that you haven’t washed appropriately in 15 years because you can’t reach it.”

“AH thank you maam for the assit. Oh whats this, I see you drip dry? Amazing. Oh, what’s that, you air dry after #2 also because you can’t reach? Excellent news.”

FUCK THAT SHIT RIGHT IN THE A

497

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

Okay what about a Gyno Dr? Could you look at Vajajay all day?

And it would probably be on lady’s like the ones at the top of this page.[/quote]

Fuck no I wouldn’t, not in a million years. Because of that fact.

For every healthy one, their will be 3 that smell like the Tuna I had for lunch. And for every hot chick, there will be 16 that make me vomit in my mouth at the sight of their snarled up lips. Gunts all hanging in my way… ugh

“Excuse me maam, can you hold you disgusting gut up while I scope this black stained, bacteria ridden filth mound you call a “she-penis” that you haven’t washed appropriately in 15 years because you can’t reach it.”

“AH thank you maam for the assit. Oh whats this, I see you drip dry? Amazing. Oh, what’s that, you air dry after #2 also because you can’t reach? Excellent news.”

FUCK THAT SHIT RIGHT IN THE A[/quote]

I have had 3 nasal fractures and couldnt smell a dead walrus on the south Texas highway.

I have yet to get that fixed just because of the reason above, I did a lot of pelvic exams and most were on woman like the two at the top.

498

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]Derek542 wrote:

$ Brother that is a very, very specialist type of job. If you could bank $750,000 a year to do it would you?[/quote]

750k a year to dig in someone’s smelly diseased anus day in and day out?

Because lets face it, no one is coming to see you for “preventive maintenance” they come see you when shit is coming out all purple and full of maggots.

I just don’t know if that is enough money man…[/quote]

OK, so about 5 years ago, I’m getting bloodwork done at (former) doc’s office. I happened to mention off handedly that my dad had some polyps removed from his ass. Doc says “Oh, family history. I want you to get a colonoscopy done. We usually wait until you’re 50 but I think this warrants it”… I’m like “what-ever”.

Sooo, when you get your ass routed, you have to ‘prep’ for it. You drink a half gallon of this nasty disgusting shit that cleans you out for a day while fasting. I do the prep. Turns out we get a blizzard that night going into the next day.

This hospital is 30 minutes away on a good day. I say “Fuck it” and drive in the blizzard to the hospital to get my ass routed out. I get there, trudge in, find a guy in the ass-tunneling department and he says “surgeon won’t be in today”. I says “no one called”. He says that was a mistake. I says “I prepped for this”. He says “sorry”. I says “SOMEONE IS GOING TO LOOK AT MY COLON!!” He says “No one here is qualified to look at your colon”.

I get some food. I go home. I call my doc. He says reschedule. I says “BULLSHIT”-- I am not doing that again for another year or so, and it will be in the summer!!!

So year or so later I do it all again… This time they do it (They put me under). I remember going out on the anastesia saying something about asses and Pink Floyd.

I wake up and surgeon says “Of all the colons I’ve seen, you’ve got one of the healthiest…” lol

FUCK YEAH BITCHEZ!!!

499

God I hope my colon is healthy.

500

[quote]countingbeans wrote:
God I hope my colon is healthy.

[/quote]

Well if you send me your contact information and your bank account number I will verify that you have a healthy colon.

Steely had to do it a few years back, my Mom had colon CA in her early 40’s. I am allergic to Demerol so Doc only gave me a little morphine. I was awake for the whole procedure.

I do not know how Gay men do it, that was the worst 45 minutes of my life.

It was even worse than my first marriage.