Maybe you shouldn’t brag about your deadlift if it’s only 30 kilos more than your bodyweight.
What? I’m 165 POUNDS
That’s like 74.5 kg
195 kg is 430lb
Used to be better than that
But as specified… double hernia repair.
Maybe you should standardize your units of measure, especially on your next date. Don’t go mixing lbs and kilos in the same sentence. You’ll just confuse the poor gal.
Just stick to stone.
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I don’t think I’ll be telling my date about weightlifting.
When the topic comes up it’s
"you workout right? What do you like to do?‘’
Me
“Used to be pretty big into the weights. Now I like combat sports with a bit of weights on the side”
Depending on her reaction I MIGHT tell her more. But the combat sports fiasco has the ability to be a turn on or a turn off depending on the girl. Same for the weights.
The idea of a guy spending at least 10 hours per week exercising doesn’t appeal to many. At its peak when I was bored in Aus sometimes it’d be 21 hours per week.
Over here as I’m on holiday I’ve only been spending 3-7 hours per week exercising. And as I’ve been sick I’ve lost some gainz, particularly in the endurance/muscle definition department.
It’ll come back quickly though. That’s what muscle memory is all about.
I don’t think many girls care about me (likely) being able to lift them over my head.
I’m just busting your chops. I knew you meant lbs for your bodyweight.
In my opinion you are doing yourself a disservice if you’re concerned that a gal might interpret your pursuits in a negative way. You should welcome it when a gal makes her incompatibility clear, or at least raises her own red flags sooner, rather than later.
You shouldn’t be concerned with sharing your interests. If she finds them problematic somehow, she’s probably not for you. You should be conscientious about coming across as obsessive and overbearing about your hobbies and interests, so make an effort to steer the conversation to other topics. There’s only so much to be said about lifting weights and fighting.
When in doubt, ask her thoughtful questions and let her talk about her.
You’re wrong about this, young warrior.
This is different than how much weight you can lift in a gym. In my experience most gals enjoy getting tossed around on a bed, couch, pool, lake, etc. Rare is the gal who doesn’t like being made to feel light as a feather.
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So my wife’s response was “No. Only other guys care about what another guy can lift.”.
I have a few more in mind to ask. I’ll update as this survey develops.
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I never dated anyone who cared how much I could lift. I never dated someone that didn’t make a positive comment about the way I could throw/move them around. I’ve also had a lot of strong grip/holding comments in a positive manner, as well as cutely pointed out bruises (from holding squeezing). Not one single how much can you lift. And I’ve “dated” a power lifter and a NPC competitor lol so if they don’t care about the actual numbers, it’s gotta be rare.
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You’re a smart guy. Probably too smart and you probably analyze shit too much. Women are confusing in general. Many times, I’ve had women say I don’t do this on the first date, or I’m not looking for a ONS, or something similar. And next thing you know, she’s giving me head and we’re having sex after meeting for the first time.
Unreal, the following is not directed at you.
I’ve had women claim they didn’t care about my muscles, and then I notice them squeezing my arms with a smile on their face while they cum. Some women don’t care about strength, size, etc… but some women do. And with 331 million people in this country, some of anything ends up being a large number.
I don’t even know what this means in this context. Do you believe woke girls have become abusers? The “horrifically internalized trauma” of shifting consent norms or of the rapey behavior that precipitated changes?
I agree with everything you wrote in this post.
And, of course, vice versa. A staunch, but not particularly informed, conservative man meets a woman who speaks intelligently of women’s issues rather than spewing knee-jerk soundbites - I believe she would have the same result with this politically naive man. Bye-bye angry MRA talk, hello happy life together with each canceling the other’s vote every four years and neither of them much minding.
Oh, as a matter of fact…that’s MY house. Though my husband was never an MRA guy as far as I know. He did spend several years without women or dating after being burned badly enough, but I don’t get the sense that there was anything political there. He’s doesn’t spend a lot of time thinking about cultural systems. Edit: and we don’t spend time talking about them. My house is where we vote differently. The rest of it doesn’t apply to me/us.
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MRA?
Mens rights activists, thought they’re generally, as far as I can tell, more anti-women than pro-rights. MOA are men opting out - they’re after letting society collapse so women will finally understand how badly they fucked it up and be sorry, but it will be TOO LATE. There’s a lot of overlap between the two.
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I agree with your whole post here, but these aren’t conversations to happen within the first few dates. You need to find yourself attracted to who a person is, political ideologies aside, THEN talk about these things when you both have some skin in the game. Talking about politics with someone you don’t care about is almost guaranteed to end without either side understanding the other, because being “right” matters more than coming to an understanding.
I’ve been married 6 years now and I can say with 100% absolution that you can either be right, or stay married. This has nothing to do with actually being right or wrong, rather finding an understanding in where your opinions differ and where they are the same. I think you will often find that both partners’ opinions will shift towards each other… Good partnerships have things to learn from one another.
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I have never once heard of a “Mens Rights Activist”, but I can assume the basis of the argument for this is held deeply within disproportionate divorce court rulings, and disproportionate responsibility pushed onto men?
Also, MOA shouldn’t be the acronym for Men Opting Out - it should be MOO. And anyone who is a ‘MOO’ is likely saying this in lieu of the ability to find a woman interested in him.
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I think you mean MGTOW.
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There’s actually an acronym for that too, MSTOW, Men Sent Their Own way, which is likely the case for most MGTOW.
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I tend to agree.
Agree.
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I have to wonder if anyone who speaks up about
Is immediately categorized as a MRA without regard to the legitimacy of these issues (should a man be bold enough to complain, ever).
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I wouldn’t talk about these things on a date. Unreal take note, JK, assuming that is common sense.
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That’s a good point.
The thing with me is that I was not interested in having a woman who is some type of sounding board for political ideas. I don’t vote and it seems my wife has voted for who she believes is the lesser of two evils. We both dislike politicians generally.
However there are serious things for child raising to consider regardless that have wound to with a political slant.
Academics
Sexuality
Acceptable music, TV, and film
Acceptable behavior and discipline
If two partners are not on the same page with these, there will be problems.
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I did! Thank you.
Yes, and with these things I agree, or at the very least, don’t disagree. But there is massive overlap between these men and the men who bemoan that girls give it to the bad boys until they’re dried up old hags or fat pigs, then look for a “cuck” to have kids with.
You know, I don’t know, I’m fairly limited to these boards in terms of debate with men, but when I bring up things like the amendment to the Violence Against Women Act of 1994 to be more inclusive of men, there are always crickets. In fact, statistics show that men are increasingly winning custody when they fight for it, but half of all divorcing couples currently agree that the mother will have primary custody. Something like 90% of custody arrangements are made out of court.
But I don’t find that angry men (men perceiving themselves as disadvantaged by women) care much about the actual rights. They seem laser-focused on the perceived injustice and the ways they personally have been impacted, even if in fact they have not been personally impacted. They’re the flip side of the man-hating feminists. I have acquaintances who disdain “women who need a man,” which seems to include all the women who want a man. Personally I like having one, and don’t want to be angry about the whatever-percent of men who are abusive pricks.
We’re lesser-of-evils voters here, too, unfortunately. And I agree that you have to have shared goals and values. I really don’t like it when my husband rants about his political hot buttons, and I’m sure neither does he like it of me.
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