And this is a new phenomenon? This has been a punchline in every coming-of-age tv show and movie forever.
How many dates have you personally been on where this has been a problem?
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Easy fix here. Make a rule for yourself not to make that move on the first date. You might even find yourself enjoying the date more, worrying less, and findimg someone you want a commited relationship with rather than trying to figure out how to get your willy wet.
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Itās generally incel talk to start blaming women or woke culture for the inability to get laid or find a partner instead of looking inward for the reasons.
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As you said above, it just read like every single coming of age comedy ever written. I donāt want to jump on the āincelā trigger too quickly, because I think itās a pretty common mindset among young men. Those comedies didnāt invent the phenomenon, they just mirrored it.
Are you seriously calling me an incel?
At the very least address me and say it to my face as opposed to directing a comment at someone else and inferring my rhetoric matches that of an incelsā¦
I have made sooooo many comments directed against Incelsā¦
You can think what you want, Iām not changing my opinion on the matter pertaining to todayās dating scene.
There are no rules here. If you want her back at your place, you ask. If she says no, you donāt take her there.
Itās also possible to wind up at one or the otherās place with no date. Iāve done it. I donāt recommend it if the sole goal is sex, but itās possible.
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Not necessarily. Just saying blaming women and woke culture for struggles with dating is very much in line with incel culture (as I understand it).
And as much as Id like to discuss face to face (to avoid unintended hostile misenterpretations), I donāt have the time for the flight.
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Are you talking about incels behind their back? At least have the decency to say it to their face.
In all seriousness though, if your current approach isnāt working for you, maybe consider a different approach? I notice any reply you received that addressed how you might do that met with stoney silence.
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All good lol
I was referring to tagging me.
My current approach isnāt failing per se. Rather I find dating somewhat confusing and convoluted as a whole. I find it difficult at times to ascertain what the person Iām seeing wants
Reread the above outloud and please understand how utterly cliche those words are coming from someone your age (or any age really).
Totally, 100% normal.
Itās not woke cultures fault. Itās natureās and the universeās fault. For all of time.
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Also very much worth appreciating that most people donāt even know what THEY want, to say nothing of their ability to express it.
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You donāt have to commit right away either. If you have fun on the date, and so did she, ask for another date. You will know shortly what she is looking for.
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Oh hell yes. I was a terrible judge of āgirlfriend materialā at 18. I wasnāt much better at 26, but I seem to have lucked out.
Anal.
The default is always anal. 
See? I even put that thing at the end so you know itās legit.
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Itās nice to see men mentoring one another. Heartening.
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I was gonna say flowers but itās really hard to put them in theā¦
Vase. 
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Whatās funny is I donāt follow this thread or anything but I saw you posted in it last and I got excited. Only to find this 
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Iāve been on the verge of posting a couple of times, but then got distracted.
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I am puzzled why people make comments against men who do not have women but want them (which was the original definition of incels, not women-hating lunatics).
If a man came to me and said, āI am having a hard time finding a woman (meaning heās an incel). I donāt just want to screw women. I want something meaningful that might turn into having a family,ā I would not say something against him. Iād inform him what is and is not his fault, but I wouldnāt be against him. I went over eight or nine reasons why the amount of incels is inflated considering theyāve always been around.
Womanless men are easy to poke at, especially in an environment in which having women is seen as some sort of social proof (hence the term āsuccess with women,ā or in a more crude term, āpulls bā-sā.)
I am sympathetic to male problems by default, which is likely one of the reasons I have friends that I consider similar to family members and even some acquaintances Iām regularly in contact with.
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This is not what an incel is today. Iām not sure of the history behind the terminology. The current era interpretation of an incel someone who is involuntarily celibate.
Inceldom refers to the community by which such men for the most part subsist within. A community rifle with misanthropy, misogyny, far-right politics, self loathing and even (at times) anti semitism and racism.
The former definition I can absolutely sympathise withā¦ I am currently struggling here. I CAN screw around if I want toā¦ but to this day Iāve never had a āseriousā girlfriendā¦ and I think thatās sadā¦ but I donāt blame women for that, or society.
I think wokism makes it somewhat more difficult, but at the same time I also have myself to blame as I an autistic and thus probably donāt read ques that others would probably have an easier time reading. I donāt blame women for my predicament, I predominantly blame myself.
I can understand how oneās frustration could lead them to run on hatred and resentmentā¦ however doing so is very seldom going to help you reach your end goal.. and joining one of these communities and reluctantly accepting āIāll never have this, so I might as well be angryā is equitable to giving up.
Incel =/= involuntarily celibate. If the man CAN ājust screw aroundā but doesnāt want to he isnāt an incel.