I realize that you rely on social media for work, but I honestly feel that a 30 day break from optional technologies at some point would be good for you
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I’m assuming that it is possible to block her. Do that. You’ll just start back at 0 if she writes to you. Second @Bagsy s idea.
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Nah she won’t don’t worry. Nobody ever came back to me.
Try a boomerang 
, it always comes back…
Dude stop thinking like that. Write goals for everyday and achieve them.
Stay positif man
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Thinking like what? Yeah I failed my previous days goals which were to work/write something…
Today 2973 cals (250 of vodka though) and factoring in the training I’m at maintenance I’d think
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vvvvvvvv
Things like that.
Every new day is a new opportunity to achieve your goal and to be awesome
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I was just stating actual facts, but yeah I see your point. I have to try and be more positive in general. Hard to turn over years of habits
Have you ever looked up the shortness of life by Seneca @aldebaran mate
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No, but I have a list of books I want to read, including Marcus Aurelius for instance, I’ll add that one.
But precisely life is short! 30 is supposed to be the best year of my life and I’ll turn 31 never having touched a woman roflll
I’m half jesting. I slept a bit better this night. I feel better. I’m working and writing stuff right now
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Look it up man. It’s powerful.
26/03
A1. Power Clean 4 x 1 with 100 kgs
A2. Box Jumps 4 x 5
A3. Clean Lunges 4 x 4 with empty bar
A4. Alternating Leg Bounding 4 x
B1. Hanging Knee Raises 3 x 30’’
B2. Hollow Hold 3 x 30’’
B3. Crunches 3 x 30’’
C. 3 km Bike + 2 km Run + 1 km Row AFAP
Feeling better going to the gym.
Here’s today’s final French contrast, using cleans and clean lunges (some Franz Bosch stuff here lol, I got creative)
Still don’t know how to sprint or bound ahah but it will come
I think I was looking just plain awful today, my physique has deteriorated. But it’s most likely water and other shit from all this.
Jumps are higher than when we started though, we almost touch the ceiling now!
The hollow holds were just terrible and my core was impossibly burning
Did the cardio bout in less than 20 mins, gave it my all. At the end when I finished everything was in fire, and I felt I hit I wall. I was just feeling so angry at the world, spiteful and sad.
I think I have put too much pressure on myself, and with this emotional and physical stress, this deload will do me a lot of good.
Here’s a more positive note: sometimes you really don’t know what impact you can have on people.
Starting at this new gym, I recognized someone from my old gym. I had completely forgotten about (don’t remember it even now lol) but I had taken him under my wing 3 years ago with another friend of him (him i remember very well). They were 16-17. Told me he wanted to do some training together, that he was still doing some stuff I introduced him 3 years ago, for instance double contraction/1,5 reps work for biceps.
So I proposed him to do some programming for him for free, just some before/after pictures. He was ecstatic and we discussed. And I didn’t even know about this, but he sent me pics and that thanks to me he had transformed his body in 6 months back then
That he still used some of the stuff I was making him do back then, like I was making him do 20 min of incline walk before his workouts.
So this is going to be fun, kid is very motivated and his nutrition is good (even though he got carried by the bulk, and too much calories)
But point is, I had completely forgotten about this, while I had “changed his life”
This touched and motivated me really. After all I can bring good in this world
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Those are some interesting lunges. I’ve never seen that before.
Congrats, that must feel great. There’s a huge difference there. I’m glad you were able to help him. I hope he gave you permission to post his photos here though 
I have to admit, I don’t quite get the purpose here.
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Well he sent them to me for that purpose.
CT calls them Bosch cleans. It specific training for running/sprints. The interest is that an horizontal as well as a vertical component. The point is to apply force to the same vectors as a sprint. Really you feel the hips flexors as well lol
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29/03 - Deload
A1. Incline DB Bench 3 x 12 with 26 kgs
A2. Zottman Curl 3 x 10 with 10 kgs
B1. Chest Press 3 x 10 with 7 kgs
B2. Hammer Curl 3 x 10 with 12 kgs
C1. Butterfly 3 x 12 with 35 kgs?
C2. Spider Curls 3 x 12 with 2 kgs
Easy work, as a deload should be. Tried to be no more than RPE 5 all along. Arms were veiny and jacked afterwards though!
Barely slept that night again, very tired. the day before was even worse, I went to bed at 7 AM (birthday)
Some Scottish badass will probably say to me to man up lol. There was on of my exes who was eyeballing me there, another girl whose friend told me she likes me, and a third enabriated one that showed no restraint, trying to open my shirt, flirting very agressively etc. Well I did nothing of course, I just danced with the last one. I guess I didn’t like them enough?
Did it make me feel better? I don’t think so no. I have self-esteem trouble with women. Friends, girls or guys that I was chatting with at the aprty about well what happened last week (obv I had been talking about this girl for months) well they told me to keep going etc, that I’ll find someone, a golden guy blabla I could have anyone. So yeah, probably. I know women can be attracted to me. But I really don’t know if the women I’m attracted to can
Anyway, it’s a been a week now and my nights are still sucky and I still about her, so it’s good it’s a deload.
But I’ve been thinking about something. In French we say “jamais deux sans trois” or “never two without three”.
And yeah last spring, during first lockdown, same period, was when my ex dumped me. And the spring before that when thins ended with my other ex lol
So i guess it was meant to be lol. But I remember how I tackled these things before. Two years ago I was the most desperate I’ve ever be, some of you can remember.
But each year pass and I’m tougher and face the pain differently. I’ve evolved, I grew. I try to think more positively.
I used to be lazy and unmotivated. Now I clean, I cook, I work hard even on my spare time. This might seem normal human behaviour to you guys, but I’m probably not normal as my mother would say, at least not socially
Anyway, I should be positive about the fact that I’m growing, and that I’m tougher and tougher. My uncle said anyway that’s better “to get hitched than divorced” and that I’m thining the weeds ahah. For sure!
What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.
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Happy Birthday!!! Sorry to hear you’re in a tough spot 
?? what was wrong with the second one?
Do you have a good idea of what qualities you fine attractive? Why the girl you’re thinking about all the time is better other girls?
you obviously don’t have to share if you don’t want to, but I’ve found that not knowing what I want (in non- romantic contexts) can be quite painful
That’s great!
I love your attitude BTW
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Well it wasn’t my birthday actually but a friend 
I’m shy actually you know, her she just took my hand and said let’s dance!
I can’t really compare you know, because after spending months talking from dawn to dusk everyday and getting to know her, I got feelings for her, so it’s biased. But to me she checkd every item in the box.
She’s beautiful, with a very athletic body and an incredible bottom. Tall and slim, and takes her fitness very seriously, even has a coach (how I knew her) and loved to hike!
She’s super sweet and nice, very easy to talk to. And I’ve never met anyone that made laugh that much. Just so funny! And well, the little attentions, words to start the day etc won me over
Then she’s smart and cultured enough, ambitious and very hard working (medical field) with a good job, a good pay, her own place…
And so on!
At first I decided I wouldn’t care about girls until i got my degree and my own place. But I had a crush. Right now I’m not interested in girls until well yeah I have something of a crush when I see them, it’s more my body that is saying me “go after her” lol
So I’m saying right now it’s more physical at first? I don’t have the chance to befriend and grow feelings for a girl right now, well because it’s a fricking lockdown and you don’t force these things.
So I think, when I’ll meet a girl I really like maybe I’ll try again?
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Holy crap, she does sound awesome
Probably a good idea since
Idk about you or her, but many of my parents’ close female friends from uni were/ are a bit more “established” than their husbands and many of them struggles in their relationships. Either the husband was implicitly envious of the wife, the husband was insecure about his place, or the wife got resentful that she had supported him and that he wasn’t supporting her when something came up years later
You’re very self aware
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Yeah exactly. Why would I ask something of someone, when I don’t even have it?
I really want this anyway. So eager to have my own place. I’ll see afterwards about this.
I just fell in love you know so then you’re stupid and you don’t think about this anyway ahah
Also I realized my 100 kgs power clean from the other day is a PR
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30/03
A1. Squat 3 x 3 with 110 kgs
A2. Lying Leg Curl 3 x 10 with 35 kgs
B1. Hack Squat 3 x 10 with 80 kgs
B2. DB RDL 3 x 10 with 40 kgs
C1. Seated Calf Raises 3 x 15 with 20 kgs
C2. Hyperextension 3 x 12
The deload leg day. Not too hard but yeah RPE 5 for the lower body or the upper body really isn’t the same. Especially when you’ve done 1 hour of boxing just before that (and one hour of coaching before that)
So that’s 3 hours at the gym. First time ever boxing/sparring and it shows but it was really fun and oh boy we burned calories! We even did several rounds of 2 vs 1 lol
Watching the vids and in the mirror I was finding myself really fat and ugly, like if this weekend of debauchery had suck all the water of the world into me and some fat as well. I’m going to start walking as of tomorrow… I also need some proper sleep or else my physique will forever stay shitty
Also bad news, internships will most likely won’t happen. But good news, looks like we’ll still have our degrees in may
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