[quote]Hot Tamale wrote:
[quote]on edge wrote:
[quote]Hot Tamale wrote:
I know for a fact that teachers are not ALLOWED to talk about politics to their students, unless of course they are teaching that particular curriculum. During the elections, teachers are also not allowed to discuss their own personal views about any candidates, the pros and cons of one candidate or another, or their views about the result of an election. This is probably why DMaddox got an apology from the teacher. So, if they are being “brainwashed” in school, as you say, then maybe you should bring this up with the school.
As for MarvelGirl, I sense your sarcasm, and your post is funny, but I do hope that every parent teaches their children to actually respect their teachers. It all starts at home, and parents are the most influential voices in a child’s life… not their teachers. A teacher spends less time with your children than their parents and their own friends do. A teacher’s job is difficult enough, without having to deal with disrespectful, arrogant children, no matter what age.
Children watch what their parents and other adults who are role models in their lives do. They imitate the behavior of adults, and repeat what they hear. As they get older, they imitate the behavior of their peers and friends. You can help to guide your own children, and your nephews and nieces. Monitor who they hang out with, and be vigilant of WHO you expose them to, and behaviors of your own that you expose them to. Teach them respect and to take responsibility for their own actions. Teach them the difference between right and wrong, and like the others said, teach them to think for themselves. You can’t control what they will think and do, but you can give them a strong foundation to make the best decisions for themselves.[/quote]
I agree with all of this post EXCEPT “monitor who they hang out with”. As parents we want our kids to hang out with good kids so we have an instinct to try to push our kids in that direction. The fact is we don’t have any control and any influence we try to exert over our children’s choices will likely create unhealthy friction between the friends.
The best we can do is raise our children to be good friends and good influences on their friends. The type of children who are not followers but will lead the group into wholesome entertainment.[/quote]
Hey On Edge, I appreciate your feedback. I totally understand where you’re coming from, so let me clarify. By monitor, I meant know who they hang out with, and that includes when and where… more like oversee and supervise. I didn’t say “control”. But let me tell you, we DO have influence on who they hang out with. I don’t recommend telling them who they can and cannot hang out with, but if we have healthy relationships with our children, we can convey to them our opinions and guide them, without causing friction. Of course, there will sometimes be cases when this causes friction, but that’s part of parenting, and you have to deal with it. But really, we are the parents, and ultimately we are responsible for our children, and have the right to know who they are with at all times. And we should voice our opinions, regardless of what they think of it. It’s called communication… an incredibly important dynamic in a parent-child relationship.
For example, with teenagers, if you see your child hanging out with someone who is detrimental to their well being, as their parent, it’s your job to keep them safe, and you should intervene, regardless of the friction you cause between them or between you and your child. Some parents think they have to tread lightly so as not to alienate their children, and yes, I agree that no one wants that. But the parents who keep a WATCHFUL but not controlling eye on their children will raise children who know their limits, and if you have children, you must know this is true. Anyway, I agree with you in that we don’t want to try to control them, and that we want them to be good influences on other people’s children. :)[/quote]
I’m not talking about parent-child friction at all, that’s life. I’m talking about the friction, maybe subtle, between the children. I would agree with you in the extreme cases where kids might get into criminal behavior, but I think for the masses that’s not the issue. If this is not the point of view you are coming from, I’d say your coming from a point of view of unrealistic idealism.
I’m sure when you were young your parents never told you they didn’t like any of your friends and not to play with them. I know this because you clearly don’t have the perspective of someone who has. In my case, there were only two other kids in the neighborhood. One of them was kind of a thug and my mom didn’t like him and me playing with him or being around his family. Her idealism. In reality, I was going to go out and play and he was there. If I listened to my mom I would have had no friends because he was going to play with our other friend. So, I have to tell my friend my parents don’t like him and that’s why he can’t come over and why I don’t want my parents to see us together. I hope I don’t have to tell you this is a screwed up unhealthy dynamic.
The best parents can do is raise their children to make the right choices in life.
As a parent, if I were to homeschool my child, I would wonder if my child will lack when it comes to the social aspect in their lives. You know, their opportunity to interact with other children of all ages. (Okay, I would not be concerned for MY kids since I’m a social butterfly lol, but in my profession, I do get asked once in a while about homeschooling, even though this is not my area of expertise). I know you’re no wallflower yourself haha, so I have no doubt that your children have plenty of social skills. I would love to know, since you can tell me first-hand, how your children felt about being homeschooled, and how they reacted socially and academically when they went to high school, after being homeschooled all their lives. Thanks, I appreciate any info you can pass on to me