Dad of the Day

Off Topic
21

[quote]Edevus wrote:
In this case, it seems sexting is not the disease, it’s a sympton.

If she doesn’t do it by phone, she’ll do it by mail, facebook or whatever. While having a honest and positive chat may change her point of view. I doubt she’ll give up on the matter. It’s possible that she’ll want it even more, because it’s forbidden and that’s very tempting.

My neighbour was a very strict father with his daughters, but the boys were super free. The girls were never allowed to go out, dress with skirts, etc.
You know how it ended? One of them pregnant at 17, one married at 16 and the other married and pregnant at 18.

That really worked well. [/quote]

I don’t care about your neighbor. That little rat-a-tat-tat doesn’t prove anything. Do you really think that less strict parenting is what we need in this fucked up world?

as for the “It’s possible that she’ll want it even more, because it’s forbidden and that’s very tempting.” Do you apply that to alcohol, drugs, everything? It might be tempting so let’s just make it ok.

Still laughing at oppression. A teen with a fucking cell phone being taken away by the person who pays the bills. HAHA, oppressed my ass.

22

[quote]Edevus wrote:

she’ll do it by mail[/quote]

LMAO

23

[quote]Edevus wrote:
In this case, it seems sexting is not the disease, it’s a sympton.

If she doesn’t do it by phone, she’ll do it by mail, facebook or whatever. While having a honest and positive chat may change her point of view. I doubt she’ll give up on the matter. It’s possible that she’ll want it even more, because it’s forbidden and that’s very tempting.

My neighbour was a very strict father with his daughters, but the boys were super free. The girls were never allowed to go out, dress with skirts, etc.
You know how it ended? One of them pregnant at 17, one married at 16 and the other married and pregnant at 18.

That really worked well. [/quote]

Moral of the story: don’t let your sons run super free sxting on cell phones, otherwise they may end up married and pregnant.

25

Meh, sexting is one thing and I also know a girl that was raised very strictly, her parents even put a recording device on the home phone and listened to her calls. As soon as she got out of the house, she went nuts and ended up pregnant and is now a single mom.

What could have been a solid decade or more of living it up was reduced to a couple years before the joys and burden of parenthood.

Preventing the sexting is one thing, but if she ends up banging which will happen eventually, making sure she knows how to not end up pregnant is the more important thing.

26

[quote]theuofh wrote:
Meh, sexting is one thing and I also know a girl that was raised very strictly, her parents even put a recording device on the home phone and listened to her calls. As soon as she got out of the house, she went nuts and ended up pregnant and is now a single mom.

What could have been a solid decade or more of living it up was reduced to a couple years before the joys and burden of parenthood.

Preventing the sexting is one thing, but if she ends up banging which will happen eventually, making sure she knows how to not end up pregnant is the more important thing. [/quote]

That girl is too young to be sexting, period. People always act like strict parents produce drug addicts, prostitutes, porn stars, and bodybuilding website editors. Yeah, that can happen, but the people I saw growing up who had the most problems had parents that really didn’t care what their kids did unless it had a negative consequence on the parent. I’d take my chances being too strict than not strict enough.

28

^so in your opinion TC is none of the above?

29

[quote]dk44 wrote:

[quote]Edevus wrote:
In this case, it seems sexting is not the disease, it’s a sympton.

If she doesn’t do it by phone, she’ll do it by mail, facebook or whatever. While having a honest and positive chat may change her point of view. I doubt she’ll give up on the matter. It’s possible that she’ll want it even more, because it’s forbidden and that’s very tempting.

My neighbour was a very strict father with his daughters, but the boys were super free. The girls were never allowed to go out, dress with skirts, etc.
You know how it ended? One of them pregnant at 17, one married at 16 and the other married and pregnant at 18.

That really worked well. [/quote]

I don’t care about your neighbor. That little rat-a-tat-tat doesn’t prove anything. Do you really think that less strict parenting is what we need in this fucked up world?

as for the “It’s possible that she’ll want it even more, because it’s forbidden and that’s very tempting.” Do you apply that to alcohol, drugs, everything? It might be tempting so let’s just make it ok.

Still laughing at oppression. A teen with a fucking cell phone being taken away by the person who pays the bills. HAHA, oppressed my ass. [/quote]

Can you read? It’s NOT the fact of taking away the phone, it’s the entire thing :

-Public humilliation.
-Use of physical violence.
-Everything being recorded on camera.

What are you talking about alcohol and drugs? I’m defending that sitting down and TALKING it’s much more effective than destroying things like this.

Don’t get me wrong, I support a spanking when the kid is very young because they don’t have common sense, but at that age, while being rebellious and all that, having a conversation will help a lot.

This “fucked up” world it’s not about strict parenting, it’s about spending time with the children and teach them values. It’s been like this now and it’s been like this all the time.

30

[quote]super saiyan wrote:

[quote]theuofh wrote:
Meh, sexting is one thing and I also know a girl that was raised very strictly, her parents even put a recording device on the home phone and listened to her calls. As soon as she got out of the house, she went nuts and ended up pregnant and is now a single mom.

What could have been a solid decade or more of living it up was reduced to a couple years before the joys and burden of parenthood.

Preventing the sexting is one thing, but if she ends up banging which will happen eventually, making sure she knows how to not end up pregnant is the more important thing. [/quote]

That girl is too young to be sexting, period. People always act like strict parents produce drug addicts, prostitutes, porn stars, and bodybuilding website editors. Yeah, that can happen, but the people I saw growing up who had the most problems had parents that really didn’t care what their kids did unless it had a negative consequence on the parent. I’d take my chances being too strict than not strict enough.[/quote]

Being strict doesn’t involve using physhical violence and public humilliation, does it?

If we agree on this, we’ll agree on everything else.

31

[quote]Edevus wrote:

[quote]dk44 wrote:

[quote]Edevus wrote:
In this case, it seems sexting is not the disease, it’s a sympton.

If she doesn’t do it by phone, she’ll do it by mail, facebook or whatever. While having a honest and positive chat may change her point of view. I doubt she’ll give up on the matter. It’s possible that she’ll want it even more, because it’s forbidden and that’s very tempting.

My neighbour was a very strict father with his daughters, but the boys were super free. The girls were never allowed to go out, dress with skirts, etc.
You know how it ended? One of them pregnant at 17, one married at 16 and the other married and pregnant at 18.

That really worked well. [/quote]

I don’t care about your neighbor. That little rat-a-tat-tat doesn’t prove anything. Do you really think that less strict parenting is what we need in this fucked up world?

as for the “It’s possible that she’ll want it even more, because it’s forbidden and that’s very tempting.” Do you apply that to alcohol, drugs, everything? It might be tempting so let’s just make it ok.

Still laughing at oppression. A teen with a fucking cell phone being taken away by the person who pays the bills. HAHA, oppressed my ass. [/quote]

Can you read? It’s NOT the fact of taking away the phone, it’s the entire thing :

-Public humilliation.
-Use of physical violence.
-Everything being recorded on camera.

What are you talking about alcohol and drugs? I’m defending that sitting down and TALKING it’s much more effective than destroying things like this.

Don’t get me wrong, I support a spanking when the kid is very young because they don’t have common sense, but at that age, while being rebellious and all that, having a conversation will help a lot.

This “fucked up” world it’s not about strict parenting, it’s about spending time with the children and teach them values. It’s been like this now and it’s been like this all the time. [/quote]

These were my thoughts when I posted the video. Dad of the Day was a misnomer.

I think his methodology sucks, and his heart is in the wrong place. About the only good thing I can say about it is that he’s doing something instead of just ignoring it.

This is not good parenting. It is an entertaining spectacle though.

32

[quote]Edevus wrote:

[quote]dk44 wrote:

[quote]Edevus wrote:

[quote]dk44 wrote:

[quote]JaseHxC wrote:
Calling your daughter a hoe while walking towards her with a baseball bat as she cowers backwards…the white folk in that neighborhood who witnessed this are making arrangements to sell their house as we speak.[/quote]

While you are probably right, I for one would be proud to live next to him. Black/White whatever, he has my respect.[/quote]

Why exactly?

I see nothing wrong with sexting. It can be uncomfortable for a father, but this kind of oppresion is beyond my comprehension. [/quote]

That girl is way too young for that shit. Oppression? Are you for real? Taking away her cell phone, which I am sure he pays the bill for, is not oppression. [/quote]

Yes, I am for real. Recording this public humilliation, with a display of violence (against the phone) to teach a lesson is awful parenting, to begin with.

How old is she? I really can’t tell from the video (honestly), but I don’t see this man the kind that would sit to have a chat about the matter. It seems that destroying stuff with a baseball bat is his strategy.

Doesn’t seem to be working so far.
[/quote]

At first I thought you were being funny, and now I see you’re not (I think). But after thinking about it…a few thoughts.

We just witnessed a short video clip and from that clip we are judging this man’s entire body of parenting, including his style. Probably unfair. All parents have their “moments” that are unflattering - it’s just reality.

IF, and I say IF, this is his general style (to put on a show, be threatening, etc.) then I would think this young lady will just be more cunning in the future, to avoid getting caught. Finding this shit on a pre or young teen’s phone needs to be addressed, but it probably requires a “sit down” first, before the theatrics. Save the theatrics for 2nd or habitual offenders.

33

[quote]dk44 wrote:

[quote]Edevus wrote:
In this case, it seems sexting is not the disease, it’s a sympton.

If she doesn’t do it by phone, she’ll do it by mail, facebook or whatever. While having a honest and positive chat may change her point of view. I doubt she’ll give up on the matter. It’s possible that she’ll want it even more, because it’s forbidden and that’s very tempting.

My neighbour was a very strict father with his daughters, but the boys were super free. The girls were never allowed to go out, dress with skirts, etc.
You know how it ended? One of them pregnant at 17, one married at 16 and the other married and pregnant at 18.

That really worked well. [/quote]

I don’t care about your neighbor. That little rat-a-tat-tat doesn’t prove anything. Do you really think that less strict parenting is what we need in this fucked up world?

as for the “It’s possible that she’ll want it even more, because it’s forbidden and that’s very tempting.” Do you apply that to alcohol, drugs, everything? It might be tempting so let’s just make it ok.

Still laughing at oppression. A teen with a fucking cell phone being taken away by the person who pays the bills. HAHA, oppressed my ass. [/quote]

As it sadly typical of internet forums, you both have valid points here, and one is not seeing the middle common ground. Strict parenting does not equal not having a “sit down” to talk about this and counsel the young lady. Being “strict” and taking away a cell phone does not equal “oppression”. And the neighbor girls in the example are a “study of one” household :slight_smile:

34

[quote]theuofh wrote:
Meh, sexting is one thing and I also know a girl that was raised very strictly, her parents even put a recording device on the home phone and listened to her calls. As soon as she got out of the house, she went nuts and ended up pregnant and is now a single mom.

What could have been a solid decade or more of living it up was reduced to a couple years before the joys and burden of parenthood.

Preventing the sexting is one thing, but if she ends up banging which will happen eventually, making sure she knows how to not end up pregnant is the more important thing. [/quote]

This is a typical correlation/causation fallacy.

In order for your observation to be valid, we’d have to be able to prove that the majority of young, unwed, unplanned children were born to mother’s whose parents were “strict”. And we both know that’s not the case.

I do agree that strictness, without reason and compromise, does tend to create rebellion and/or a lack of restraint when “freedom” finally does arrive. You can be strict, but appropriately flexible. And I don’t think “strictness” need be associated with unreasonableness.

I’m strict with myself, and I don’t feel the least bit oppressed for example. I have “rules” concerning how I conduct my social affairs, how I eat, how I maintain my body, how I parent, etc. etc. etc. Rules and guidelines are good. “NO” without instruction or purpose is oppression.

35

[quote]pushharder wrote:

[quote]super saiyan wrote:

[quote]theuofh wrote:
Meh, sexting is one thing and I also know a girl that was raised very strictly, her parents even put a recording device on the home phone and listened to her calls. As soon as she got out of the house, she went nuts and ended up pregnant and is now a single mom.

What could have been a solid decade or more of living it up was reduced to a couple years before the joys and burden of parenthood.

Preventing the sexting is one thing, but if she ends up banging which will happen eventually, making sure she knows how to not end up pregnant is the more important thing. [/quote]

That girl is too young to be sexting, period. People always act like strict parents produce drug addicts, prostitutes, porn stars, and bodybuilding website editors. Yeah, that can happen, but the people I saw growing up who had the most problems had parents that really didn’t care what their kids did unless it had a negative consequence on the parent. I’d take my chances being too strict than not strict enough.[/quote]

Preach it, brother. I’m serious. I have two well behaved, very well adjusted, hard working, courteous grown kids to back it up. Neither of them became a drug addict, prostitute, porn star, or bodybuilding website editor.[/quote]

“…bodybuilding website editor.”

Ouch!

36

[quote]TC wrote:

[quote]pushharder wrote:

[quote]super saiyan wrote:

[quote]theuofh wrote:
Meh, sexting is one thing and I also know a girl that was raised very strictly, her parents even put a recording device on the home phone and listened to her calls. As soon as she got out of the house, she went nuts and ended up pregnant and is now a single mom.

What could have been a solid decade or more of living it up was reduced to a couple years before the joys and burden of parenthood.

Preventing the sexting is one thing, but if she ends up banging which will happen eventually, making sure she knows how to not end up pregnant is the more important thing. [/quote]

That girl is too young to be sexting, period. People always act like strict parents produce drug addicts, prostitutes, porn stars, and bodybuilding website editors. Yeah, that can happen, but the people I saw growing up who had the most problems had parents that really didn’t care what their kids did unless it had a negative consequence on the parent. I’d take my chances being too strict than not strict enough.[/quote]

Preach it, brother. I’m serious. I have two well behaved, very well adjusted, hard working, courteous grown kids to back it up. Neither of them became a drug addict, prostitute, porn star, or bodybuilding website editor.[/quote]

“…bodybuilding website editor.”

Ouch!

[/quote]

LOL. I was hoping you would see that. Admit it, you had strict parents didn’t you TC?

37

You know who I feel bad for? The cellphone sales rep who’s going to have to explain to to this guy that physical damage isn’t covered under warrenty, if he has insurance there’s a deductable, or they aren’t up for a discount on a new phone and have to pay retail. Oh the stories I have working in cellular retail for 11 years.

38

[quote]Edevus wrote:

[quote]super saiyan wrote:

[quote]theuofh wrote:
Meh, sexting is one thing and I also know a girl that was raised very strictly, her parents even put a recording device on the home phone and listened to her calls. As soon as she got out of the house, she went nuts and ended up pregnant and is now a single mom.

What could have been a solid decade or more of living it up was reduced to a couple years before the joys and burden of parenthood.

Preventing the sexting is one thing, but if she ends up banging which will happen eventually, making sure she knows how to not end up pregnant is the more important thing. [/quote]

That girl is too young to be sexting, period. People always act like strict parents produce drug addicts, prostitutes, porn stars, and bodybuilding website editors. Yeah, that can happen, but the people I saw growing up who had the most problems had parents that really didn’t care what their kids did unless it had a negative consequence on the parent. I’d take my chances being too strict than not strict enough.[/quote]

Being strict doesn’t involve using physhical violence and public humilliation, does it?

If we agree on this, we’ll agree on everything else.
[/quote]

Public humiliation is when your 15 year old daughter gets knocked up, not your dad yelling at you in front of the neighbors.

When my sister first started dating, my dad found a jar of vaseline in her room. I remember him GRILLING her with questions and watching her squirm. I’m sure she would have much rather he just smashed the shit out of it.

39

[quote]SmilingPolitely wrote:

Public humiliation is when your 15 year old daughter gets knocked up, not your dad yelling at you in front of the neighbors.

When my sister first started dating, my dad found a jar of vaseline in her room. I remember him GRILLING her with questions and watching her squirm. I’m sure she would have much rather he just smashed the shit out of it.

[/quote]

What was the Vaseline for?

40

[quote]TheBodyGuard wrote:

[quote]Edevus wrote:

[quote]dk44 wrote:

[quote]Edevus wrote:

[quote]dk44 wrote:

[quote]JaseHxC wrote:
Calling your daughter a hoe while walking towards her with a baseball bat as she cowers backwards…the white folk in that neighborhood who witnessed this are making arrangements to sell their house as we speak.[/quote]

While you are probably right, I for one would be proud to live next to him. Black/White whatever, he has my respect.[/quote]

Why exactly?

I see nothing wrong with sexting. It can be uncomfortable for a father, but this kind of oppresion is beyond my comprehension. [/quote]

That girl is way too young for that shit. Oppression? Are you for real? Taking away her cell phone, which I am sure he pays the bill for, is not oppression. [/quote]

Yes, I am for real. Recording this public humilliation, with a display of violence (against the phone) to teach a lesson is awful parenting, to begin with.

How old is she? I really can’t tell from the video (honestly), but I don’t see this man the kind that would sit to have a chat about the matter. It seems that destroying stuff with a baseball bat is his strategy.

Doesn’t seem to be working so far.
[/quote]

At first I thought you were being funny, and now I see you’re not (I think). But after thinking about it…a few thoughts.

We just witnessed a short video clip and from that clip we are judging this man’s entire body of parenting, including his style. Probably unfair. All parents have their “moments” that are unflattering - it’s just reality.

IF, and I say IF, this is his general style (to put on a show, be threatening, etc.) then I would think this young lady will just be more cunning in the future, to avoid getting caught. Finding this shit on a pre or young teen’s phone needs to be addressed, but it probably requires a “sit down” first, before the theatrics. Save the theatrics for 2nd or habitual offenders.[/quote]

It’s being recorded, he’s using a baseball bat and he continues the drama act outside. It gives me the feeling that it’s bit more than just a bad moment. Like, if he had found the phone with the messages in there and destroyed it inmediately , you could say it was a “bad moment”.

Why do you think I was trying to be funny? Doing what I just described says a lot of this person and I certainly don’t approve his methods. You can be strict without doing this.

I agree that we are assuming things (IFs and IFs), but I don’t think this is the way to do things and having this prepared and recorded is not being strict, but an idiot.

Maybe the use of the word “oppresion” in my first post wasn’t appropiate.

[quote]SmilingPolitely wrote:
Public humiliation is when your 15 year old daughter gets knocked up, not your dad yelling at you in front of the neighbors.

When my sister first started dating, my dad found a jar of vaseline in her room. I remember him GRILLING her with questions and watching her squirm. I’m sure she would have much rather he just smashed the shit out of it.

[/quote]

How old was she?

We have a different opinion on what’s a public humilliation. Finding this kind of messages in your daughter’s phone is a very good signal that it’s time to sit down and have a talk about sex, especially about protection, not just to avoid pregnancy, but nasty STDs.