[quote]dirtbag wrote:
You know I had a really messed up childhood more so then most. I was a bully to 2 kids in school. Why?; cause I could and it felt empowering. I had no morals at that age. But when those kids fought back. I loved it then it was on. Then when I beat them into the ground. I would give them time to heal for round 2. Then it was on. What stopped me was my love for women. It was better then fighting.
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Ain’t Karma a bitch?
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Sure is! not speaking for dirtbag but what i read into his messge was that when kids fought back he would bully all the more - so perhaps raising a doubt as to the effectiveness of fighting back. Suppose it all depends on the bully’s reaction to being stood up to, though in his cse - what was it about the 2 that made them targets, perhaps they had looked like victims, some kids do or look like they dont fit in with the crowd etc
[quote]dirtbag wrote:
You know I had a really messed up childhood more so then most. I was a bully to 2 kids in school. Why?; cause I could and it felt empowering. I had no morals at that age. But when those kids fought back. I loved it then it was on. Then when I beat them into the ground. I would give them time to heal for round 2. Then it was on. What stopped me was my love for women. It was better then fighting.
[/quote]
Ain’t Karma a bitch?
[/quote]
Sure is! not speaking for dirtbag but what i read into his messge was that when kids fought back he would bully all the more - so perhaps raising a doubt as to the effectiveness of fighting back. Suppose it all depends on the bully’s reaction to being stood up to, though in his cse - what was it about the 2 that made them targets, perhaps they had looked like victims, some kids do or look like they dont fit in with the crowd etc[/quote]
One kid deserved what he got. He use to abuse his little sister. And I mean in every way he could. So all the kids made sure he got what was coming. But when he fought back I loved it.
The other kid eventually I didn’t care about. Got into some scraps. That was it.
But either kid never fit in anywhere and were loaners. They had no friends. Also it was a belonging thing. If you lived in my area all the kids picked on these 2 some more or less then others. As kids in the neighborhood we decided we hated them. I just went along with it.
Not saying its right or wrong just saying what happend
As for my relationship status. I don’t live with his mom. I see him once or 2 times a week on average. But I want to help.
Thanks for everyone that has repsonded so far.
I have talked with the mom and told her that he needs to stick up for himself and put these kids in there place. But she said then he will be the one that is the bully at school according to the teachers. I then told her but he needs your support at home that if he gets into trouble for defending himself its ok at home and to no worry what the teacher says. Since she is a teacher she hates this idea.
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
Is his father in the picture, dirtbag?[/quote]
He thinks he is by paying support and seeing his kid once every 2 or 3 months.
Compared to real dads that are there he is not even close. I think he phones once a week or uses skype but that is not a real dad. That is someone that is fake and on TV.
Dude, I was a bully when I was in grade 6 at 4’8 80lbs.(Not kidding). I was never picked on for my size because I had a feisty attitude. I picked on kids bigger than me. Not physically, but more on the name calling and trying to start shit kinda way. I don’t know what woulda happened if any of the kids took me up for a fight, but they were scared because of my “no bullshit-never scared” attitude.
It probably helped that I was friends with half of the school’s population at that time. But still, I think attitude is important. As soon as someone walks in the room, you can usually tell if they’re going to fight back or not.
[quote]B.L.U. Ninja wrote:
Dude, I was a bully when I was in grade 6 at 4’8 80lbs.(Not kidding). I was never picked on for my size because I had a feisty attitude. I picked on kids bigger than me. Not physically, but more on the name calling and trying to start shit kinda way. I don’t know what woulda happened if any of the kids took me up for a fight, but they were scared because of my “no bullshit-never scared” attitude.
It probably helped that I was friends with half of the school’s population at that time. But still, I think attitude is important. As soon as someone walks in the room, you can usually tell if they’re going to fight back or not.[/quote]
Yeah I know its a confidence thing. You can smell them.
But what I learned is that why bother just can you can doesn’t mean you should.
All I want to do is turn this situation around for the kid.
Sometimes the bullies get a taste of their own medicine. A friend of mine Big Dave 6’7" 400 has a son who is a big(6’4" 260 in HS) softie, very gentle soul, he’s not slow just odd.
Anyway he was bullied in PS by the jocks. Grade nine rolls around and the HS football coach sees Daves kid and starts to lick his chops, please let him play he says. The kid wants nothing to do with sports but he trys out anyway. First practice he gets home with a big smile on his face.
Hey dad he says, "remember those fellows that harrased me in school?, well, they won’t anymore, I pounded them into dust today, I like to play offensive line lol. His son quit because he’s just not a violent and aggresive person but he did manage to get the bullies to leave him alone. Some bullie stories have a happy ending.
Re:Confidence, I saw a show on serial killers and one commen theme was when picking out a victim the killers always looked for a slocher or someone that looked timid.
[quote]AndrewG909 wrote:
giving him the confidence to throw a punch is more than enough to deter kids at that age from picking on him.
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Somewhat…as that’s only a slice of the pie. Kids need confidence in themselves not just their fists. Bullies don’t pick on people/kids who walk and act tall.
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I disagree with this. I went to a school that closed down after my 2nd grade year, so had to go to a new school starting in 3rd. I was a cocky, rambunctious kid and got in fights non-stop. The kids at my new school didn’t know this. We were in the gym and they were playing kickball. I said I wanted to play and they told me no. When the ball was pitched I ran up and kicked it anyway. 3 or 4 kids tried to “jump” me [or as much of a jumping as a group of 3rd graders could dole out]. I punched the first one square in the mouth and dumped him on his ass and wrestled around with the other 2 or 3 before the PE teacher basically threw us around the gym and made us sit out for a couple of minutes. After that, people generally knew I’d bust their ass but I still got into shit. That’s because ALL kids have tempers and ALL kids nuts grow when they’re part of a group. As long as you’re down to occasionally deflate their little baby nuts you shouldn’t have a problem.