Let’s hear them, what are your best taunts you’ve used and had used on you?
Not just any old “you’re so skinny…”
or “I’ve seen better legs on a chair”,
Let’s hear them!
Every time a buddy of mine see’s a guy who’s like over 6’ and under 180lbs, you know the guys who look so gawky with their mouth hanging open.
he says “last time I saw a mouth that big I had a hook in it.”
Isn’t that a classic Caddyshack one?
It was a fairly quiet day in the weight room. One of those guys who only trains his pecs and biceps - you know the type - was there showing a skinny friend of his around. There was me, and this other chick that I don’t know, who had a nice build, and these two yahoos. Then the pecs/biceps guy says “Try to stay out of the way of the big girls” to his buddy.
The big girls!!! What the hell???
I was both flattered and offended at the same time.
I’ve shared this elsewhere before, but it fits here. I asked this question to a guy who was making me wait for a power rack while he finished his curls…
“Are those your legs or are you standing on a chicken?”
Amsterdam Animal wrote this in another thread,
I was walking around my gym 3-4 years ago with a big upper body and a poor excuse for legs. Everyone kept complimenting me on how huge I was etc. All they ever asked me was the quickest, easiest and least painful way to get big. Not one of these smucks asked me why I never wore shorts in the gym.
So I finally got my shit together and asked the dude with the biggest legs in the joint if I could please train with him and his PL girlfriend. After getting my ass kicked on leg day for over 2 years and him telling me open and directly what I needed to do, my legs grew and I was actually challenging his PR’s. I will tell you there is nothing like hearing “you fucking pussy, my girl squats more than you?”
A
I’ve read this here and used it: “There’s a thread hanging off your sleeve. Oh I’m sorry, it’s just your arm.”
Another:
“I don’t see any red (veins in eyes), put on more weight!”
[quote]Ugluk wrote:
“Are those your legs or are you standing on a chicken?”[/quote]
That was a good one…I almost spat my drink all over my computer…at work…
“Come on…a REAL man could do it”.
This works very well coming from a female.
[quote]superstar wrote:
It was a fairly quiet day in the weight room. One of those guys who only trains his pecs and biceps - you know the type - was there showing a skinny friend of his around. There was me, and this other chick that I don’t know, who had a nice build, and these two yahoos. Then the pecs/biceps guy says “Try to stay out of the way of the big girls” to his buddy.
The big girls!!! What the hell???
I was both flattered and offended at the same time. [/quote]
HAHAHA! That’s awesome. I love it when girls are more intense in the weight room than most guys.
To bloke “So…does your husband lift?”
[quote]Neebone wrote:
Ugluk wrote:
“Are those your legs or are you standing on a chicken?”
That was a good one…I almost spat my drink all over my computer…at work…[/quote]
Mine is a slight variation on that one…
“Are those your legs or are you riding on a chicken”
I can’t claim credit for this one:
"Just remember, somewhere in China, a little girl is warming up with your max.?
I was working out with a good friend back in college. He asked me to hand him a 10lb DB (I don’t know what exercise he was going to do). So, I picked up the DB between my thumb and pointer finger with my other fingers gingerly sticking up in the air as if I was drinking tea with the Queen of England. I made a big production in handing him the delicate little weight. He said “F-you!” then busted out laughing.
“Dude, I could break your arms off and clean my ears out with them”.
“I crap bigger than you” (From the movie “City Slickers”)
Here’s a good one: but it only works in certain situations.
Ask to work in a set with someone on tricep/leg extensions or something that weight can easily be added to. Don’t ask for a spot. If the guy walks away (like going to get a drink of water), do your set then when you leave, add a shit-load of weight and walk away. The guy comes back thinking “Holy crap”.
[quote]Irish Daza wrote:
To bloke “So…does your husband lift?”[/quote]
That works good for golf too when somebody makes a putt and it stops about half the distance from the cup.
[quote]chris paul wrote:
I can’t claim credit for this one:
"Just remember, somewhere in China, a little girl is warming up with your max.?
[/quote]
Love that one.
“You look like 10 pounds of shit in an 8 pound bag”