[quote]Robert A wrote:
[quote]idaho wrote:
Will207,
^^^^^^^. Thank you. Nothing special or heroic on my side, just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time, and, I was extremely lucky on all three.[/quote]
Idaho,
Thank you for sharing the details above. I realize I am venturing out of my lane commenting on this, but I disagree with the bolded. Both simple statistics and your observation about so many officers quitting after an OIS shows that someone with your experiences meets the definition of special, as in different. At the risk of starting an argument, and knowing I am going against your modesty, I am also going to point out that the etymology of hero has strong implications and associations with being a “protector” and “one who watches over”. I think that is as fair a description as any of your chosen career path.
The fact is you have in the past, and continue to go into harms way in order to protect others, and you do so with full, experiential, knowledge that your risk and sacrifice may be met with ingratitude by some of those you protect. If that doesn’t fit your definitions of special or hero than perhaps there is a language issue. I am grateful and humbled for you sharing of the above, and for your past and continued service.
Since I am already out of my lane I may as well keep going. I hope your modesty is in no way due to any second guessing or regret of the above actions. If it is, please know that to what ever extent is possible over the faceless internet you have impressed me as a man you makes moral and reasoned decisions. I have faith that the above shootings were the morally, ethically, and tactically justified actions of a good man.
Further more I would also like to say that it is ok to be “ok” with the shootings above. The idea that not being racked with guilt or demons from doing what is necessary to protect yourself or others is somehow evidence of being damaged, broken, or empty in any psychological, moral, or spiritual sense is modern, revisionist nonsense. Doing what you do for the benefit of others in not shameful, if anything I think pride is/would be appropriate. At least that is how I see it.
I haven’t been there. I haven’t done that. I am not a brother in arms. I am in no way qualified to weigh in on this stuff.
I could easily be wrong.
But I am not.
Thank you.
Train hard. Stay safe.
Regards,
Robert A[/quote]
Robert,
Thank you for the kind words and I am truly humbled by your post. I genuinely do not feel I am anything special and I will try to explain: I have been very fortunate to train and work with some of the most elite units in the U.S. military, our NATO counterparts, and specialized units in states. Last November, I spent two weeks in West Virgina, training with members of various tactical teams around the country. I came away from that training having to face the fact, that on that level, I was just “qualified”. A humbling experience that teaches you to just suck it up and get better. I feel like we all need a kick in the butt occasionally or we start believing that we are better than we are.
The definition of a hero to me is what someone has went through that I havent, and faced death or sickness with calmness and honor. I have met and had conversations with two MOH recipients and came away from that experience with a sense of purpose, to do more with my life. I once worked with an officer whose 6 year son was fighting leukemia. He and I worked same shift (2300-0700). His wife was a school teacher. He would leave work, go home, care for his son until the wife got off work, catch a few hours sleep, come into work. He had to work to keep the medical insurance for his son. That is a hero in my eyes.
I thought long and hard about death. The thought of getting killed is not as terrifying to me as being severly injured and especially being blinded,trapped and burned to death, paralyzed, losing legs or arms. I have met many over the past few years with brain injuries, missing limbs, etc…and I always wonder if I would have the guts to be as strong as they are, would I have the sheer courage to go on with life, a shell of my former self? I know people who battle back from those injuries get no medals but deserve my highest respect.
And to Mapwrap, Will, and others here, to put on the uniform everyday, to handle all the stress from working the streets, and then have to deal with a public and the department brass , who will feed you to the wolves to cover their asses, thats true courage. In a way, I have it much easier now than when I worked the streets, (sad), but the lines are much clearer here: You are either alive at the end of the day or you are not, you either have all your body parts or you dont. Simple and a lot less stressful than doing everything you can to make a “right decision” and not end up under an ME’s knife.
This is not arrogance or ignorance, but I have never felt guilty about dropping the hammer on a bad guy. I believe this comes from being orphaned at a young age and I didnt have the luxury of lying to myself. I just know, I will make the best decision I can, with the time and information given, after that, what else can you do? Cannot always say it will be the right decision, but, I know that it wasn’t made out of panic.
The three shootings above were not mine in the making, the perps made the decision to take it to the next level and I am not responsible for their decisions. There is a old saying in police work: “A suspect’s actions dictates an officer’s reactions”. Maybe this all justification on my part, but, fuck it, I didnt try to kill them first.
Since we are talking seriously, I really dont know if am as morally strong as in the past. Over the past few years, my hatred for Islamic extremists is growing. I believe they are vicious cowards, killers of the worst stripe and their sick brand of religion needs to be cleansed, so, the coward who beheads helpless men, I dont know if he would survive a fair hearing with me. So, in that regard, I am glad Mapwrap is out there to do the right thing.
And never forget, you are indeed a brother in arms. Just because you dont carry a badge, doesnt mean you are not a brother.
Too serious a conversation:)) I think I will post a couple of recent pictures for humor’s sake.
