Bad Habits You Can't Shake

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82

[quote]Chushin wrote:

[quote]thethirdruffian wrote:

[quote]Edgy wrote:

if I counted all the wimmenz i have ever had sex with, give or take 10 - I would be either be at 6 or negative 4.[/quote]

A much more normal number.

I am not proud of the situation.

It’s just very, very easy for me to get laid. I know I am very attractive, and and I love sex — except when it fucks with my normal life, which it has and probably will.

Literally a bad habit I cannot shake.[/quote]
Ruff, I hope you’ll take this in the spirit in which its offered.

The fact that it has (and likely will again) cause problems in your life is a real warning sign. I would never say you are a sex addict, but something more than “I like fucking” is going on here. Maybe it’s your AAS use, I don’t know. I would guess that it’s surely contributing as I know of two other men that has happened to.

Alternatively, there could be something going on at a psychological level, especially if you grew up in a dysfunctional family.

Maybe it’s a combination of both factors; I don’t know, and I’m no expert. But I do have some background and experience in mental health, and I think that maybe you should consider getting some sort of outside help. At a minimum, at least do some research on your own, and see if anything rings true for you.

Hope that this is somehow of some help to you.
[/quote]

Sorry, he’s just a very tall, good looking, guy who can get laid by attractive women absurdly easily and likes it. If he didn’t like the sex and drama, he’d stop.

No sympathy.

TTR, if you want to get married, keep your pants on.

Also, reconsider your conversion.

83

[quote]thethirdruffian wrote:

[quote]Edgy wrote:

if I counted all the wimmenz i have ever had sex with, give or take 10 - I would be either be at 6 or negative 4.[/quote]

A much more normal number.

I am not proud of the situation.

It’s just very, very easy for me to get laid. I know I am very attractive, and and I love sex — except when it fucks with my normal life, which it has and probably will.

Literally a bad habit I cannot shake.[/quote]

I have recently learned that Japan might be the kind of place that is right in your wheelhouse.

However, I have also been reminded you have to check and make sure your “date” didn’t have sex with your sushi earlier in the day.

84

[quote]Alpha F wrote:

[quote]thethirdruffian wrote:

[quote]csulli wrote:
Maybe you need to just fuck a bunch of random women and reconsider ever getting married.[/quote]

And this is what I get for being honest.

My goal is to stop fucking around and have about 5 kids.[/quote]

Only God can help you.

And I mean it literally.

If it is as bad as you say it is I doubt having children will help as your brother suggested - I would not use my children that way, anyway.

Having someone greater than yourself to surrender to, to be your head, to be accountable to in honor of word and deed. A relationship with someone greater than yourself. A wife will never fit that role, neither do children; YOU fulfill that role for them.

Don’t get married and have children until you can be like a god for your family.

Learn honor, dignity, integrity. What do these qualities mean?

How can you wield your free will to command them?

Do not wait until you are forced by weakness to learn humility.

If you want to command a family you need to learn self-mastery and your humility is what will make you great in the eyes of your wife and children.

You will have no authority until you can will yourself in or out of anything with the power of your spirit.

You are not truly powerful until you learn to be the master of your self ( master your powerful drives ).

I am not talking get a religion necessarily - I am talking develop a spiritual awareness and a connection to a spiritual head: someone greater than yourself to surrender to.

A deep, intense spiritual relationship.

Key sentiment: surrender yourself to the power of the spirit.

Make this your most private and intimate relationship.

[/quote]

He’s supposed to be converting to Judaism. I think he missed the “no sex” outside marriage class.

86

[quote]Alpha F wrote:

Do not wait until you are forced by weakness to learn humility.

[/quote]

Why not?

Worked for me.

To the degree that it did.

88

The only bad habit TTR can’t shake is lying his ass off.

Am I seriously the only one on this site who can see this?

89

[quote]on edge wrote:
The only bad habit TTR can’t shake is lying his ass off.

Am I seriously the only one on this site who can see this?[/quote]

I don’t have hard evidence, so I cannot say for certain, but TTR and I have had a few private conversations that, along with my own intuition, lead me to believe he is who he claims to be.

I believe him.

91

[quote]Chushin wrote:

[quote]on edge wrote:
The only bad habit TTR can’t shake is lying his ass off.

Am I seriously the only one on this site who can see this?[/quote]

Why do you say this?[/quote]
I guess it’s the same as DN lol. Most of us have seen no evidence that TTR is a 10 foot tall Native American with an oil empire who’s slept with thousands of women. (I am embellishing slightly)

Although I confess, it never occurred to me that he would be lying either.

92

[quote]csulli wrote:

[quote]Chushin wrote:

[quote]on edge wrote:
The only bad habit TTR can’t shake is lying his ass off.

Am I seriously the only one on this site who can see this?[/quote]

Why do you say this?[/quote]
I guess it’s the same as DN lol. Most of us have seen no evidence that TTR is a 10 foot tall Native American with an oil empire who’s slept with thousands of women. (I am embellishing slightly)

Although I confess, it never occurred to me that he would be lying either.[/quote]

Going by the photographs circulated the first time around, he is certainly very tall and swarthy and at least the tall and swarthy person in the photographs was clearly going to bed a single attractive woman.

I am also sceptial, however. I searched TinEye and Google Image for the photos with no luck, so if the photos were staged, some effort went into the process.

Other than that, no idea as to truth or falsity, other than his stories make him look like a putz. Generally, the Dark Ninjas internet playactors of the world go for the “Mary Sue” Character where everything is rosy and not 3/4 shitty.

FWIW, Mrs. Jewbacca thinks he has PTSD, exhibits pretty standard risk-taking behavior, and his stories regarding women fit right down the fairway of what combat vets with PTSD do. Some basically have no fear, so hit on women with machine gun rapidity and no fear of rejection. Of course they get lucky a lot, just by sheer number of attempts and the brazen nature of the attempts.

93

[quote]Chushin wrote:

Ok, here’s a first for me:

I think you’re wrong on this one, JB.

There’s too much of a compulsive element to what he’s describing.

[/quote]

You and my wife are giving him slack.

Perhaps it’s the father-of-daughters in me; I’m just disgusted.

94

[quote]Jewbacca wrote:

[quote]csulli wrote:

[quote]Chushin wrote:

[quote]on edge wrote:
The only bad habit TTR can’t shake is lying his ass off.

Am I seriously the only one on this site who can see this?[/quote]

Why do you say this?[/quote]
I guess it’s the same as DN lol. Most of us have seen no evidence that TTR is a 10 foot tall Native American with an oil empire who’s slept with thousands of women. (I am embellishing slightly)

Although I confess, it never occurred to me that he would be lying either.[/quote]

Going by the photographs circulated the first time around, he is certainly very tall and swarthy and at least the tall and swarthy person in the photographs was clearly going to bed a single attractive woman.

I am also sceptial, however. I searched TinEye and Google Image for the photos with no luck, so if the photos were staged, some effort went into the process.

Other than that, no idea as to truth or falsity, other than his stories make him look like a putz. Generally, the Dark Ninjas internet playactors of the world go for the “Mary Sue” Character where everything is rosy and not 3/4 shitty.

FWIW, Mrs. Jewbacca thinks he has PTSD, exhibits pretty standard risk-taking behavior, and his stories regarding women fit right down the fairway of what combat vets with PTSD do. Some basically have no fear, so hit on women with machine gun rapidity and no fear of rejection. Of course they get lucky a lot, just by sheer number of attempts and the brazen nature of the attempts.[/quote]

This and other previous posts referencing the wisdom of Mrs. Jewbacca lead me to request that she makes an account and starts posting here herself.

95

[quote]aeyogi wrote:

[quote]Jewbacca wrote:

[quote]csulli wrote:

[quote]Chushin wrote:

[quote]on edge wrote:
The only bad habit TTR can’t shake is lying his ass off.

Am I seriously the only one on this site who can see this?[/quote]

Why do you say this?[/quote]
I guess it’s the same as DN lol. Most of us have seen no evidence that TTR is a 10 foot tall Native American with an oil empire who’s slept with thousands of women. (I am embellishing slightly)

Although I confess, it never occurred to me that he would be lying either.[/quote]

Going by the photographs circulated the first time around, he is certainly very tall and swarthy and at least the tall and swarthy person in the photographs was clearly going to bed a single attractive woman.

I am also sceptial, however. I searched TinEye and Google Image for the photos with no luck, so if the photos were staged, some effort went into the process.

Other than that, no idea as to truth or falsity, other than his stories make him look like a putz. Generally, the Dark Ninjas internet playactors of the world go for the “Mary Sue” Character where everything is rosy and not 3/4 shitty.

FWIW, Mrs. Jewbacca thinks he has PTSD, exhibits pretty standard risk-taking behavior, and his stories regarding women fit right down the fairway of what combat vets with PTSD do. Some basically have no fear, so hit on women with machine gun rapidity and no fear of rejection. Of course they get lucky a lot, just by sheer number of attempts and the brazen nature of the attempts.[/quote]

This and other previous posts referencing the wisdom of Mrs. Jewbacca lead me to request that she makes an account and starts posting here herself.
[/quote]

I’ll ask her. She just posts when I am doing something in the office and bored and messing with my computer.

97

[quote]Jewbacca wrote:

[quote]csulli wrote:

[quote]Chushin wrote:

[quote]on edge wrote:
The only bad habit TTR can’t shake is lying his ass off.

Am I seriously the only one on this site who can see this?[/quote]

Why do you say this?[/quote]
I guess it’s the same as DN lol. Most of us have seen no evidence that TTR is a 10 foot tall Native American with an oil empire who’s slept with thousands of women. (I am embellishing slightly)

Although I confess, it never occurred to me that he would be lying either.[/quote]

Going by the photographs circulated the first time around, he is certainly very tall and swarthy and at least the tall and swarthy person in the photographs was clearly going to bed a single attractive woman.

I am also sceptial, however. I searched TinEye and Google Image for the photos with no luck, so if the photos were staged, some effort went into the process.
[/quote]

It would be pretty interesting to see if TTR responds to On Edge’s callout.

99

[quote]Cortes wrote:
For habits that are not strongly connected to a dopamine response (unfortunately both of yours appear to be), I have found that the best way, for me, to completely rid myself of a habit is to NOT quit it. What I do is WRITE DOWN my conviction first to just keep away from the object of my desire for 30 days. Recently I had a terrible addition to Red Bull. Before that Diet Coke. In both cases, I wrote something to the effect of: I will drink only water or juice for the next 30 days. (You should write in the positive, not the negative, so don’t write: I will NOT dip for the next 30 days).

As far as dopamine related addictions, the solution is not always so easy, but, again, it requires first visualizing yourself as someone who would NEVER indulge in such habits.

There are a couple of very, very good threads here about quitting internet porn. I highly recommend you read them. [/quote]

Hey, this is actually in response to pretty much everything you wrote on this theme in this thread…I’ve had my own addiction issues, but I only managed to overcome them with a slightly different form of self-programming.

See, I was always given advice like what you said – and mind you, I am NOT saying you’re wrong because I’ve seen your basic advice work with plenty of other people – but for me, it never sunk. The more I hated the addiction, the more I told myself ‘never again,’ the more it became an obsession in my head.

The only trick that worked for me (which was slipped into my subconscious using a variety of techniques) was to convince myself that I didn’t actually NEED to stop indulging. In fact, my programming was that I could do it whenever I felt like it, I just don’t feel like it right now.

The advantage of this programming was that on the few times that I did relapse, I only indulged my obsession once. Back when I had the ‘NO NEVER AGAIN’ programming, when I relapsed, I’d pile on the guilt and get the, “Oh f— it, let’s just binge out” mindset.

Once I changed my focus to the ‘no big deal’ mindset, the relapses never turned into binges, and I generally only had two or three brief self-indulgent moments that never got messy.

And I’m not sure I want to get into the exact types of addictions at the moment, but I think they were serious.

Have you ever encountered something like that, or someone who used such a technique?

I just bring it up because maybe, it’s the type of addiction-fighting mindset that would work with certain personality types. I don’t know, maybe I’m just a really weird case, but I’d appreciate your impressions (or anyone else’s, for that matter).

100

[quote]Cortes wrote:

Alpha, I don’t think you’ve ever once written a post that I did not feel a little bit smarter or better for reading.
[/quote]

Thank you kindly and I am glad it has been beneficial.

I have to say I am amazed to learn you have had problems with heavy addictions because of the level of success you ave achieved and the amount of knowledge ( reading Shakespeare? ) you have accumulated.

If I had used drugs like you say you did I would probably only ever read medicine labels.