I met Michael Moriarty (Law and Order) one summer when I was working at a restaurant in Toronto.
The guy sat down in my section on the patio and was completely wasted. He was accompanied by two dudes who looked like they were homeless and equally as wasted as him.
Moriarty was wearing designer duds, but he looked liked he’d been sleeping in a dumpster. He was pretty dirty and had on alligator skin shoes with no socks! They ordered a round of drinks (of course) and I said, “No problem.”
Once inside I tell my manager about the situation and he says, “Michael Moriarty? I love that guy!”
I say, “Yeah, but he’s fucking hammered, I don’t think I’ll be serving him.”
So my manager says okay, “Ask them to leave then.”
Once outside I tell them, “Sorry guys, but unfortunately I can’t serve you by law because you’re already intoxicated.”
The two homeless guys get pissed and jump up like they’re gonna kick my ass; my manager sees this through the window and rushes outside to try and calm the situation down.
The homeless guys start cursing my manager out and pull out this thick stack of $20’s, waving it in the air while calling us both bitches. Moriarty doesn’t say a word, gets up from the table and starts to walk out. At this point all of the customers on the patio are staring in disbelief at these two greasy mother fuckers going ape shit.
That’s when my retard for a manager stops Moriarty and gushes, “You know, I’m really a big fan. I really admire your work on Law and Order.”
Moriarty shakes his hand (dirty finger nails and all) mumbles something incoherently under breath and stumbles out after the other two who are still shouting obscenities.
Needless to say, I enjoyed a few pints of lager after work that night.
