oh wait, you said “asking”
[quote]csulli wrote:
[quote]bpick86 wrote:
Something that was said in this thread got me to thinking, I know far more men that have left when things got hard than women. I think there is something in a lot of our natures that makes us more prone to leaving than women. Women, at least women that I know, seem to be the ones that are more likely to stay and see things through when bad things happen. Men, myself included, seem to be more naturally self absorbed than women. I used to would not have said this was true when I was still dating but now that I am married that definitely seems to be the case. Maybe because I am looking at this as a Husband/Wife dynamic more so than a boyfriend/girlfriend one.[/quote]
Maybe it’s an age thing. I’m only 24, and the “girls” I know are mostly in their 20’s. In general they are more self absorbed than men, they are more likely to cheat in the relationship, they are more likely to leave when things get hard, this includes husband/wife relationships as well.
I’m not sure why you’re so misandristic, but my observations are literally the complete opposite of yours. Obviously what I observe cannot override what you observe, but where does this leave us?[/quote]
From what I’ve seen, one of the biggest factors is what both the man and woman have as their ideal role in the relationship (once the honeymoon is over).
Gender aside, when expectations are not met and resentments begin to pile up, it’s just a matter of time before the relationship dissolves.
[quote]bpick86 wrote:
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]bpick86 wrote:
[quote]orion wrote:
There is some much straw flying around I wonder what you are trying to build here.
I never said women were evil.
Thats what game is, we just dont follow the female narrative of how the relationship between the two sexes ought to be.
You are assuming that men automatically want a relationship, while the truth is most of the time we just want to fuck. Furthermore, it is a mans job to get you into bed, it is your job to get him into a relationship, by showing that you have more to offer than just sex.
What you basically doing is shit testing me.
Yeah, if I accepted your femcentric reality, yeah, if I accepted that relationships, relationships, relationships, yeah, if I accepted the female narrative I would probably think I suck too.
But I dont.
Your rules suck for me, not gonna play by them. [/quote]
Men have by far the most power in the relationship game. At least men worth a damn do. You can make the argument that women control the “yes or no” but I would say that more power is in the ability to ask the question. You control whether or not they even have the chance to go out with you. You are not asking a girl if she will go out with you, you are telling her that you would allow her to go out with you if she chose to. We do not fear rejection because we are more hardened in our emotions because we have been there and done that. I think most men inherently understand this but I will say that fewer seem to because men are becoming soft. [/quote]
That, I fully agree with. [/quote]
So what is your problem with relationships? Sometimes you talk as if you are afraid that if you end up in a relationship, you will somehow lose that power. Being in a relationship does not change who you are. To an extent it does, as I feel my wife pushes me to be a stronger, more confident, and just all around better man because I know that is what she craves in her husband. If a woman falls in love with you, she will assume that submissive role in the relationship as long as you remain that same strong man she fell in love with and were not putting on a front. [/quote]
I am not really afraid, it is more like, what for?
I know that I was sold a fairy tale, you know, two people who would love and respect each other and grow together, for better or worse.
Now I see women more as biological automatons that are ruled by an iron biological programming you can play on like on a fiddle if you only know how to.
Even that would not be that bad if they were able to perform some introspection , and some are, I remember a discussion on female sollipsism where every third paragraph by a woman was something like “shit, I am doing it again” and yes, she was.
I dont see any way to emotionally invest anything into someone that in that specific area has the emotional maturity of a 13 year old, thinks is a born relationship expert and is told by society that its OK to yield to any meaningless brainfart that happens to bubble up.
With the same amount of game to make this work I can have a rotation of women.
addendum: If they would understand they could steer themselves better is a very interesting topic, Dalrock has some good thoughts on this. Like, if you know you are a little hyperganaut, for heavens sake do not try to find a husband in a bar, the situational alpha there is almost bound to be a douchebag. And he IS gonna make your panties wet, garantueed.
“Relationships” are a very very bad idea anyways.
You may think that they are a critical part of your life. Maybe even a necessity.
You’ve heard that a fructuous, happy, healthy relationship is necessary to be a fructuous, happy and healthy person.
That’s a cool fairy tale, but it’s a fairy tale nonetheless.
“Relationships” are a recent invention. An historical oddity. A cultural exception.
Three centuries ago, they didn’t even exist.
There were families and affairs. But that’s not the same thing. At all.
It wasn’t about love, it wasn’t about sex, it wasn’t about feelings and emotions.
It was about survival, money, land, cattle, names and power.
At some point, we decided that it was over.
The Romantics invented something else.
Goethe wrote something about “elective affinities”. Walt Disney put the propaganda on screen.
Women started to believe the fairy tale.
Most men initially thought it was bullshit
But their sons and grand-sons converted en masse and learned to “flirt”.
That’s not evil. But that’s definetely puerile.
Because what the Romantics knew, and what we too often forgot, is that it is doomed to fail.
Since we are throwing anecdotal evidence in this thread. Here is mine : most relationships i’ve witnessed are nothing more than carefully crafted self-delusions and regularly re-inforced double binds. Especially the “happy” ones.
Relationships are sucessful when they find a way to NOT be “relationships” after the honeymoon. Or when they are not really “relationships” to begin with.
(sorry, i just thought it was about time to not let Orion be the only “bitter misogynist” on this thread).
If I’m ever in a grownup person relationship I am going to put a drum kit in the basement so if we get mad at eachother we can go bang the crap out of it and get our frustrations out.
Good idea, eh? EHH?
Ya, I’m not really reading this thread much, but I like randomly contributing crap 
[quote]Spock81 wrote:
If I’m ever in a grownup person relationship I am going to put a drum kit in the basement so if we get mad at eachother we can go bang the crap out of it and get our frustrations out.
Good idea, eh? EHH?
Ya, I’m not really reading this thread much, but I like randomly contributing crap :)[/quote]
Punching bag.
Here is my first ever relationship advice:
Every marriage should have one.
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]kamui wrote:
I am sooooooo looking forward to an answer to this. [/quote]
Sorry it took me so long to get to this. I’m out of town overnight tonight at a work training, so last night I made dinner for my boyfriend and then we had sex on my living room floor. After that we snuggled and talked about our future together until it was time to go to sleep, so I didn’t have time to get into TNation.
You anti-women guys were probably doing the same thing, though, and weren’t even reading.
Anyway, you’re going to need to clarify your statements above, Kamui. Are we still dealing in an analogous situation where most people get and keep jobs just fine in a given job market, but one man keeps having work conflict and can’t hold his job? And you’re saying that’s do to with systemic issues rather than shortcomings on the part of the oft-fired employee? I dunno. Employers NEED employees, so it is to the advantage of both to attract the best possible candidate. If an employer has fifty guys lined up to do his work, yes, he will expect a great deal of our embittered fellow.
Perhaps the male/female balance is such now. Personally, I don’t NEED a man. I have a job instead. So I merely WANT a man. He’d better be a quality candidate, else why bother? Do I want to nurture some cranky slob? No.
But since so many people find jobs and partners, I dispute your (I guess?) claim that the system does not support success in either of these arenas.
[quote]Spock81 wrote:
If I’m ever in a grownup person relationship I am going to put a drum kit in the basement so if we get mad at eachother we can go bang the crap out of it and get our frustrations out.
Good idea, eh? EHH?
Ya, I’m not really reading this thread much, but I like randomly contributing crap :)[/quote]
I have a govt-spec, nuke-proof, Cuban Missile Crisis-era bomb shelter 20’ below my house with a Ludwig kit in it. And I can play a lot of the RHCP songs from Blood, Sugar, Sex, Magik. Wanna fuck?
[quote]
Sorry it took me so long to get to this. I’m out of town overnight tonight at a work training, so last night I made dinner for my boyfriend and then we had sex on my living room floor. After that we snuggled and talked about our future together until it was time to go to sleep, so I didn’t have time to get into TNation.
You anti-women guys were probably doing the same thing, though, and weren’t even reading.[/quote]
Wrong, last night i was spanking miss Kamui with a riding whip AND reading this thread at the same time.
Men can multitask like that.
[quote]Anyway, you’re going to need to clarify your statements above, Kamui. Are we still dealing in an analogous situation where most people get and keep jobs just fine in a given job market, but one man keeps having work conflict and can’t hold his job? And you’re saying that’s do to with systemic issues rather than shortcomings on the part of the oft-fired employee? I dunno. Employers NEED employees, so it is to the advantage of both to attract the best possible candidate. If an employer has fifty guys lined up to do his work, yes, he will expect a great deal of our embittered fellow.
Perhaps the male/female balance is such now. Personally, I don’t NEED a man. I have a job instead. So I merely WANT a man. He’d better be a quality candidate, else why bother? Do I want to nurture some cranky slob? No.[/quote]
You’re right. I was wrong.
You’re not in the same position than an employer in a country with 40% unemployment.
The fact that you merely WANT a man but doesn’t NEED one only give you another advantage during the negociations.
So you’re in an even better position than an employer with 40% unemployment. And men are in an even worst situation than workers would be in such economical conditions.
In such economical conditions, ANY worker could be and would be “oft-fired”, because the labor turnover would naturally sky-rocket.
And, in such economical conditions, making fun of them would be extremely cynical, wouldn’t prove anything about their quality or lack thereof.
[quote]
But since so many people find jobs and partners, I dispute your (I guess?) claim that the system does not support success in either of these arenas[/quote]
Many people find jobs, but 40% of people are single and the vast majority of people who are not currently single will be single again in less than 5 years.
This system doesn’t support success, at least not the kind of success it pretends to support.
[quote]DBCooper wrote:
[quote]Spock81 wrote:
If I’m ever in a grownup person relationship I am going to put a drum kit in the basement so if we get mad at eachother we can go bang the crap out of it and get our frustrations out.
Good idea, eh? EHH?
Ya, I’m not really reading this thread much, but I like randomly contributing crap :)[/quote]
I have a govt-spec, nuke-proof, Cuban Missile Crisis-era bomb shelter 20’ below my house with a Ludwig kit in it. And I can play a lot of the RHCP songs from Blood, Sugar, Sex, Magik. Wanna fuck?[/quote]
That sounds awesome!
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]Spock81 wrote:
If I’m ever in a grownup person relationship I am going to put a drum kit in the basement so if we get mad at eachother we can go bang the crap out of it and get our frustrations out.
Good idea, eh? EHH?
Ya, I’m not really reading this thread much, but I like randomly contributing crap :)[/quote]
Punching bag.
Here is my first ever relationship advice:
Every marriage should have one. [/quote]
Transferring problems to violence and anger instead of discussion.
Yeah that could work
[quote]Derek542 wrote:
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]Spock81 wrote:
If I’m ever in a grownup person relationship I am going to put a drum kit in the basement so if we get mad at eachother we can go bang the crap out of it and get our frustrations out.
Good idea, eh? EHH?
Ya, I’m not really reading this thread much, but I like randomly contributing crap :)[/quote]
Punching bag.
Here is my first ever relationship advice:
Every marriage should have one. [/quote]
Transferring problems to violence and anger instead of discussion.
Yeah that could work[/quote]
Did you fuck my wife?
[quote]Chushin wrote:
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]Spock81 wrote:
If I’m ever in a grownup person relationship I am going to put a drum kit in the basement so if we get mad at eachother we can go bang the crap out of it and get our frustrations out.
Good idea, eh? EHH?
Ya, I’m not really reading this thread much, but I like randomly contributing crap :)[/quote]
Punching bag.
Here is my first ever relationship advice:
Every marriage should have one. [/quote]
So that’s what explains my success???
Who knew?
[/quote]
Yeah, you being all hot, sweaty and aggressive, punching things.
If that does not work, what would?
[quote]Chushin wrote:
[quote]DarkNinjaa wrote:
[quote]orion wrote:
Ach come on, you know better than that.
Philanderers, alleged murderers, rapists → socially dominant as fuck, alpha- Serial killers get tons of “love” letters.
In case of pedophiles I would expect that social ostracism would weigh heavily against him, so I will treat it as an unproven assumption that women stay with those voluntarily. They often will though as long as he is not exposed, which just goes to show that there are women who will trade in her daughters sexuality and mental health for a piece of alpha.
The last part about a lot of women not leaving in case of disease or accidents but everyone is really free to look up when women initiate a divorce, job loss, loss of status, illness, whatnot.
So in last case NAWALT if I must, but a lot of women are like that.
[/quote]
Oh, I see. If I understand, that quote of yours was some kind of warning to the ‘‘betas’’ guys out there. A woman is likely to leave her ‘‘beta’’ other half when he needs her the most. Right? No? It all comes down to the Beta and Alpha ranks, yet again. Was that your point? A woman would not leave a man if he were an Alpha, which means, a woman doesn’t ALWAYS leave. Right? No? Haaaaaaaa!! My thoughts are scattered!!! Somebody saaaaaaaaave me!!!
Do you wish you’d been more ‘‘Alpha’’ when you got dumped, Orion?
[/quote]
Wow!!!
Not a single cuss word!
:-)))[/quote]
LMFAO!!!
Honestly, I hate swearing when I’m addressing Mr O. He sure pisses me off, but damn, do I hate swearing at the mofo.
I just want to know whether O had some pussy last night…
[quote]DarkNinjaa wrote:
I just want to know whether O had some pussy last night…[/quote]
Na, last night he tried to sync his out of whack sleep cycle again and failed miserably.