I don’t think your weight gain is at all concerning. Going by the pics you have posted, you look healthier now with a few more kg on.
Is it possible that you are eating a better macro ratio and therefore actually building muscle?
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I’ve definitely need eating less processed food and a LOT more carbs due to fruit consumption
Honestly, I don’t know. I’ve always been like this. It’s the reason I don’t procrastinate
This is a huge deal. You will never have the ratio of freedom to responsibility that you currently do again. Now is a time to learn and grow, but you need to cut loose and have fun too. Take it from a guy that missed out on a lot of shit throughout college to focus on over-preparing for the future.
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Yeah… I guess part of my “issue” is that I always feel like I need to “train” for that time
I burned myself out doing that and have yet to totally come back from it…4 years after graduating college.
You also need to remember that your version of half-assing things is probably still going to do more for you than going balls out will for 95% of others.
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Without trying to be morbid, there is a fair chance living in the future is ensuring you have no future. You have health issues you need to address now that are tied to gaining weight.
All the men in my family died young. I am not used to living like I am going to be old. Its not guaranteed, but the present is.
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Can I go further and suggest that dealing with health issues now is the very definition of preparing to live longer and to live better?
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You say you want to gain weight but you don’t actually want to gain weight.
That’s why your same concerns pop up every week or two.
I assume your health issues that were weight related have not improved since you’ve gained not more than a few pounds.
I don’t think this has anything to do with your concerns about the future or discipline. I think that’s entirely a cover-up for body image issues and your phobia of fat.
My phobia of getting fat extends to the future
When you use this word it is admission of it being irrational.
Which is a good first step.
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Any fear can be extended to the future.
It’s not the “when” that needs to be addressed, it’s the fear itself.
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As far as I know, you’ve never been fat, so you don’t have to walk such a narrow margin of error as you don’t have tons of empty adipocytes ready to fill up on short notice.
I’m not sure continued weigh-ins are your friend. As others have remarked you routinely fret about the number on the scale. The number should be going up anyway. Your body composition is more or less the same. Maybe you need to weigh yourself to not undereat, I can certainly relate to that possibility. If I fly blind, I’ve at times been predisposed to undereat.
It’s good you used the word “phobia” and @T3hPwnisher highlighted what the use of that word actually means for you.
There’s been a lot of good advice here since your earlier @ but also going back for… literally thousands of posts.
Continue trying to pay heed to them. If you can.
Personally, I’m bad at being receptive to outside influences telling me anything directly and therefore I acknowledge that this may not work for you as it wouldn’t for me. I think. I’m not sure that I would have done anything different than what I did if (when*) anyone urged me to do things better aligned with my long-term goals**.
On a final note, you are so future-focused and while it’d certainly be a good thing if you could — as someone else suggested — exist more in the present I’m doing a hail-mary here trying to piggyback off of your predisposition to guide your actions in the now by your perception of the future:
Right now, you seemingly are being very reactive. You weigh yourself routinely, you track your calories, and you respond very immediately to fluctuations over short timeframes. Is that what you want for your future self? Couldn’t an alternative be to develop a more holistic approach, that cuts out the minutiae and demands perhaps 20% of your current effort while yielding 80% of the “results”? Rather than distinguishing between your present and your future accept that there is no tangible distinct boundary between the two.
*Maybe people did and I’m too much of an asshole to remember
**I’ve for the longest time conflated performance goals with aesthetics goals. I know you have a serious dedication to your deadlift, but mostly your posts relate to your look, so I’m not sure whether you are making the same conflation as I was.
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Thank you so much
Definitely not an asshole
This is very likely… and I don’t really have the equipment to train deadlift at the moment which is proving very, very hard. I’m doing the best I can with what I have but the inevitable strength losses are really messing with me, especially since I went through a similar period the same time last year
You don’t have equipment to train the movement directly, but I’m sure you could apply yourself to find a way to train the muscles involved.
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Weighted pistols and rdls, some lunges
Hopefully, it helps at some point.
Sadly, I don’t really have any tips. My deadlift responds well to deadlifting and not much else.
If I were constrained at home with dumbbells/kettlebells I’d work to become the champion of tempo work, iso pre-fatigue, overcoming isometric holds, 1+1/2 reps, uni-lateral movements, mind-muscle connection, and holding top-contractions. I’d focus on building muscle mass that I can later realize into strength potential once gyms opened back up. And do explosive work. Broad jumps, for instance.
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And do ab-work.
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Yep. I start my lower body workouts off with low rep jump squats focusing on explosion
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You hang out on instagram right? Check out fortitude_training for some novel band movements.
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