Alex, I’m a longtime lurker on your log. Had to comment finally since you’re getting a placement. One of my 3 children is adopted. Congratulations and good luck!
Could you share a bit about how the UK foster system works? US is notorious…
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Wow! That’s amazing, good luck- it will surely be very fun 
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Thanks for lurking and commenting! We’ve been given heads up about a placement, very excited now. Fantastic that you adopted, it’s funny I speak to so many people now having been through the process and they say oh that’s amazing (fostering or adopting, surprised to see a lot don’t even know the difference) we’d love to do that some day, but sadly so few do.
In terms of UK process I’ve found it very thorough and very professional, it’s taken a year to get here and it’s been (rightfully so) a very invasive procedure. We have our own social worker who looks after our interests and our children’s, makes sure our placement offers are suitable, checks on our welfare and guides us through the usual red tape. Then the child placement has their own social worker.
I’ll update once we’ve gotten a bit of experience but I’ve been very impressed so far.
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Yes hopefully so (not even an “fun”!), some sleepless nights coming our way though!
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Wow that’s amazing!
We talked about the US foster care system in my behavioural Econ and public policy class a few weeks ago. That was definitely not the description my professor gave the us system 
Oh dear, @jdm135 what’s your experience been in the US? Also if you don’t mind me asking what was the motivation behind adopting?
Am I reading that right that you have 2 jobs, 2 kids and are looking to foster another?
No end of respect for that man.
We’ll get away pretty lightly. Work will likely ratchet up several levels and I’ll move into the home gym again but with schools still open, there won’t be much other impact.
My wife and I are keen to foster. But your youngest is (mildly) asd. And we still think he needs our efforts. But longer term it’s something I’d love to do.
Good luck and very envious
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Haha yes, gluttons for punishment, I definitely couldn’t do it without an amazing wife she definitely gets a huge amount of credit!
Yea I noticed my supermarket was rammed yesterday just on the whiff of an announcement of lockdown, I assume nobody noticed that last lockdown there was still food on the shelves (despite stock pilers best efforts).
Yea it’s fantastic news about schools that was hard working from home with kids in the house permanently.
We were intending on doing it later as our kids are both still quite young (both primary age) but they were the ones who triggered it, they were very keen for a sibling, but that’s not possible anymore (snip!) So we talked to them about fostering and they were well up for it! To safeguard them we’ve gone for very young placements (i.e. can’t talk or lash out) as our kids get older that may change. Like you recognise it has to be right for the whole family - you’re all in it together!
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Sadly false near me. I spent a fair amount of time walking around shops trying to help the old, vulnerable customers who literally couldn’t find toilet paper to use or food to buy. Plenty of shops around here had whole aisles empty.
Exactly the kind of role models these kids need, awesome stuff.
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I’m in the South East. And it was shocking. The only shop with food in was a lidl. And that’s because the distribution centre is les than 3 miles from the super market.
My wife and I (in expectation) have been putting some food side for a while. We have enough food to last a while. Not loads. Just a few bits.
But its sickening how self centred and serving people get in the face of a crisis.
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We adopted internationally, so outside of the US system. But I’d rather discuss that system, and our motivation, in a longwinded PM when I get the chance. Might be a day or two before I get in front of an actual keyboard though.
Sound reasoning. A year younger than your youngest child is a good rule of thumb, two years or more even better, at any age I’d say.
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Though I don’t want to spew any negativity, I couldn’t resist commenting and will say that I am an international adoptee. I’m only n = 1, but I have strong feelings about adoption that many adoptive parents will not like. With that being said, I think the foster care system is one of the better models today. I hope it all works out well for your family.
Looking forward to it!
Awesome stuff on the family front! 
What is the difference between fostering and adopting?
Always good to have opinions of those who’ve experienced it first hand from this point of view, it may be n=1 and there will be plenty of people who have the same experience and there will be plenty of others who have the opposite experience. Doesn’t make either experience more or less valid.
Feel free to share I’m sure @jdm135 won’t mind.
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Thanks K, fostering is a temporary arrangement, caring for children which can be short or long term (generally long term if they’re older). The idea being that you care for the children whilst courts settle cases, or social workers do work with the birth families to improve conditions in the hope that they can return (not often possible unfortunately). Sometimes it’s years (often if the kids are 10ish+ they’ll never get adopted so stay in foster care, usually just with the one family until 18).
Adoption is a permanent thing to make someone else’s child legally yours.
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I would love to hear what you have to say, painful though it may be. Feel free to pm me if you wish.
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Fostering sounds like a truly noble and caring thing to do. I don’t think I could live with the uncertainty of it though. To know that this child you take in, care for and eventually love like one of your own might leave again must be very stressful. For all parties involved, I imagine.
I have a lot of respect for your family for doing this, you sound like really good people and you are setting a great example for your kids.
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