[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
This photo makes my knees feel week. Library porn. [/quote]
That’s hot on so many levels I don’t even know where to begin… (The statement, not the picture)
I know this sounds mushy, but my realm is wherever my boys are. Hanging with my little guys and watching them grow up is pretty much my whole life.
In the woods or on the water.
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
I think my realm would be any place with a lot of books. Libraries, schools, bookstores…anywhere books are a central fixture. I love everything about them - the look, the smell, and of course, the contents. When I go into a really lovely library or cool independent bookstore I feel as I do in a beautiful church…quiet, reverent, and a little worshipful.
Big chain bookstores are fine by me, too. So well organized, and so clean and bright. And I love visiting people who love books, and getting to skim the titles on their shelves.
This photo makes my knees feel week. Library porn.[/quote]
I second that. The smell of books is one of my favorite things. New books, old books, it doesn’t matter.
The UCSD library is just incredible.
[quote]Jillybop wrote:
I know this sounds mushy, but my realm is wherever my boys are. Hanging with my little guys and watching them grow up is pretty much my whole life.
[/quote]
So your husband is okay with coming in third in your realm?
[quote]mikeron wrote:
The smell of books is one of my favorite things. New books, old books, it doesn’t matter.
[/quote]
I had a young lady friend of mine who liked the smell and sound of new books. Specifically, she would go to the bookstore, buy a new hardcover, bring it home and soak it in the tub. She then dried it on the radiator. As she read the book, she would savor the smell and sound of each page as she pried them apart.
She also liked the smell of new money, and the way her thumb smelled after she stuck it in her mouth. In a group of people, I would watch her slyly sniff her wet thumb. To put it mildly, she was a bit quirky. Smart - she worked for the IT department of an investment bank - but quirky.
How come none of you guys have written “vagina”?
I had higher expectations of you guys. sighs You let me down.
[quote]Loose Tool wrote:
Jillybop wrote:
I know this sounds mushy, but my realm is wherever my boys are. Hanging with my little guys and watching them grow up is pretty much my whole life.
So your husband is okay with coming in third in your realm?
[/quote]
Never said that. He’s right there beside me. Actually, most days it feels more like taking care of 3 boys… 
On my front porch with some friends, cold beer, and a smoke.
I am lucky to have simple pleasures.
If not socializing, then reading a great book or just about anything outdoors, physical work included.
Religion (Islam). Praying five times a day, especially the early morning prayer, while everyone else is sleeping, is my realm. Puts me at peace and one with God. Love it. Couldn’t ask for anything better.
On Stage (Growling and playing bass)
Chasing Redfish, Trout, and Flounder in the ICW or the Big River. Trolling the beach for Kingfish and jumping Tarpon from behind the Shrimp boats. Fishing is life, and all things come second.
[quote]Jillybop wrote:
Loose Tool wrote:
Jillybop wrote:
I know this sounds mushy, but my realm is wherever my boys are. Hanging with my little guys and watching them grow up is pretty much my whole life.
So your husband is okay with coming in third in your realm?
Never said that. He’s right there beside me. Actually, most days it feels more like taking care of 3 boys…
[/quote]
Spouses should come after children under any circumstance. It’s the natural order of things. I love my wife and I would do anything for her. I would die for my kids.
Hungry Hill
The hills where my grandfather an his family were raised. A cpl hills back away from the country road it’s on, is like being in complete isolation from all annoyances.All you hear is birds an animals in the swamp thats @ the bottom of the last hill.
[quote]eengrms76 wrote:
Spouses should come after children under any circumstance. It’s the natural order of things. I love my wife and I would do anything for her. I would die for my kids.[/quote]
I guess I think of it the other way around. In the natural order of things, kids are replaceable, a fully functional, productive, breeder, is not so easily replaced.
[quote]Loose Tool wrote:
eengrms76 wrote:
Spouses should come after children under any circumstance. It’s the natural order of things. I love my wife and I would do anything for her. I would die for my kids.
I guess I think of it the other way around. In the natural order of things, kids are replaceable, a fully functional, productive, breeder, is not so easily replaced.
[/quote]
Hmm, actually I think this changes with time. When the kids are first born and while they are very young, they become the first priority. Once they are older, the spouse/relationship shifts back into the forefront. Although I do believe it is really important to continue to “keep the flame alive”, so to speak, and show your kids how much you value your partner, too.
Not an easy balancing act, for sure. Sorry for getting off-track, this is a cool thread.
BTW, rrjc, I wondered where you were, too. 
the rainforests and rivers back home, its just my escape from the city and its masses of people and consumerism
[quote]Mister T. wrote:
Loose Tool wrote:
eengrms76 wrote:
Spouses should come after children under any circumstance. It’s the natural order of things. I love my wife and I would do anything for her. I would die for my kids.
I guess I think of it the other way around. In the natural order of things, kids are replaceable, a fully functional, productive, breeder, is not so easily replaced.
Agreed.
I have to think that putting kids before the spouse puts quite a strain on a marriage. It seems like everyone who does this inevitably ends up on the path to divorce, or at least general animosity toward the spouse.
But what the hell do I know; I’m just an observer.[/quote]
And people that put spouse in front of kids often end up with jackass kids. As Jilly said it is a balancing act.
nice post. reminds me of my favorite song…
"I’d like to be under the sea
In an octopus’ garden in the shade
He’d let us in, knows where we’ve been
In his octopus’ garden in the shade
I’d ask my friends to come and see
An octopus’ garden with me
I’d like to be under the sea
In an octopus’ garden in the shade.
We would be warm below the storm
In our little hideaway beneath the waves
Resting our head on the sea bed
In an octopus’ garden near a cave
We would sing and dance around
because we know we can’t be found
I’d like to be under the sea
In an octopus’ garden in the shade
We would shout and swim about
The coral that lies beneath the waves
(Lies beneath the ocean waves)
Oh what joy for every girl and boy
Knowing they’re happy and they’re safe
(Happy and they’re safe)
We would be so happy you and me
No one there to tell us what to do
I’d like to be under the sea
In an octopus’ garden with you."
-Ringo Starr
[quote]Zap Branigan wrote:
Mister T. wrote:
Loose Tool wrote:
eengrms76 wrote:
Spouses should come after children under any circumstance. It’s the natural order of things. I love my wife and I would do anything for her. I would die for my kids.
I guess I think of it the other way around. In the natural order of things, kids are replaceable, a fully functional, productive, breeder, is not so easily replaced.
Agreed.
I have to think that putting kids before the spouse puts quite a strain on a marriage. It seems like everyone who does this inevitably ends up on the path to divorce, or at least general animosity toward the spouse.
But what the hell do I know; I’m just an observer.
And people that put spouse in front of kids often end up with jackass kids. As Jilly said it is a balancing act.[/quote]
It’s not a matter of putting one first over the other in your daily life. The whole family unit is a team and it is important to balance (as Jilly and Zap said).
But I feel that a spouse is more easily replaceable than your own flesh and blood. Not that “replacing” either is easy. This thread was about where you feel you place in life is, not who you should spend more time with on Saturday afternoon.
Besides my mistress comes first anyway (well not always…)