See, Conan has a point. Mighty Mouse was a real short little fella, but he was stacked for his size, and he kicked ass.
Comparing yourself to an animal. That about sums up the intelligence.
NOTE: “Bigconan” attacked several people this morning in various threads. The posts were not accepted. His behavior has become very troll-like. T-mag staff wasn’t sure if he was a troll or just really stupid and pathetic. Either way, we have barred him from posting on the T-forum.
a real short little fella, but he was stacked for his size, and he kicked ass
Hey, that sounds like me!
I didnt notice the short girl on the web site. Well spotted.
I reckon its a tall person conspiracy!!
IronDoc - that was the funniest damn thing I ever read on a message forum!!!
Diesel23 - actually you were right. A bear CAN run 65 km/hr. A cheetah can hit 60 Mph. And as far as this whole Lion/Cheetah thing, throw them and a griz into the mix against a polar bear who can’t find a seal to snack on… wouldn’t be pretty.
I know Bigconan is not posting anymore - but I know he'll be reading this.
So, tell me conan, oh great one. You're so big so powerful, so strong, so skilled in the Martial arts. You can defeat anyone.
Would you do us all a favor and save the human race by...sending your ass over to Iraq and fighting for the freedoms you enjoy? Oh whats that - havent got the balls? Dont have the ability to hump in the desert with 70 lbs on your back for miles and miles and miles and miles? Dont like sleeping in the cold in nothing more than a sleeping ba - if you're lucky? Cant go for months with no more than 3 hours of sleep at night, if that much, and an average of 1 meal-ready-to-eat a day, maybe 2 if you're VERY lucky?
Can't handle a bullet coming your way? Dont have the mental toughness to handle the screams and moans of your men who are lying in a bloody bath with a leg? Cant keep fighting knowing you'll probably have the same fate if the enemy keeps putting up a fight the way they do?
And bigconan - Bears DO RUN MUCH FASTER than a lion. A lion CANNOT outrun a fucking bear.
On the topic of functional mass, do you know what it is? Fat doesn push iron.
Can you even sit down without strugling to breathe - and always find yourself unbuttoning your size 44 pants to give way to your massive belly? Can you breathe like a normal human being, or do you look like an asthmatic everytime you walk 3 feet?
When was the last time you got laid? When was the last time you had more chicks than a 185 lb guy? If you cant get more chicks and claim your throne as the Alpha male, than what does 275 lbs do for you?
See, you're just a BIG FAT MOUTH.
You have no girls; you have no courage, no guts, you have no strength of mind to fight through the unbearable; you have obviously no endurance and no speed (Id love to see your fat ass sprinting); do you even have a GOOD job? Seems to me you mistook the trees for the forest once again buddy.
Greg Valentino once too thoguht if he had the biggest arms on the planet he'd be a god. Everyone would want to be him and girls would beg to suck his dick. Well, fast forward to today, he's a big freak with bags of nuts for arms; he cant get laid (not without paying); I dont think he has a good career...All he has is his freakness. See, he too mistook the trees for the forest, and instead lost it all.
You're no different.
JPFitness,
you’re a married man, Ms. JpFitness wouldnlt like that.
Best reply from this post so far:
Podge:
“I’ll pull out my 21st century pistol and split their skull.”
instant classic…
A couple last points- first off BigCrack you fucked up so bad you won’t be able to post your pick now and prove how much of a “animal” you are. I think that is ridiculous. Second, the larger female lions might actually be able to out perform and beat the male lion. The only reason why he’s there is because he has a big mouth like yourself. Go research it. The females are much more compact, powerful, and viscious but the male sounds and looks bad. He’s there to scare shit off and make little cubs. Thats really all his role is. Too bad you won’t be able to make some little cubs of your own since you scare off the females too. I’ll never speak off you again since you can’t defend yourself now, but I had to put those last two cents in knowing you could read them still.
ArcaneCocaine: 
If I thought you guys liked me being a tad naughty now and then, I’d let loose. Gots plenty more where that came from… It’s just too bad there’s asses out there that take my shit too seriously.
Greekdawg: I don’t know, between Irondoc’s quips and Podge’s bullet… I’d say 6 on one hand and a half dozen on the other for instant classic appeal.
JPFitness: Actually, it was Mrs. JPFitness that taught me my tricks… She doesn’t have a passel full of pups for no reason, ya know.
GuruX: Yup, gots ta agree. AnAceUpMySleeve must have BigConan up his hole… Some folks just don’t know what to do with their time, or their projections.
Karma said: ';-) If I thought you guys liked me being a tad naughty now and then, I'd let loose. Gots plenty more where that came from... It's just too bad there's asses out there that take my shit too seriously.'
Last time I checked this wasnt a Porno website, much less an adult dating site.
I could not care less what you say on this board - go right ahead and talk about your sexual preferences and fantasies all you want. However, once you start labeling those who oppose your sexual talk as 'asses' you're not gonna get on my good side.
I personally had the opinion from the second I saw her post, that Karma's own reason for posting what she did was simply to steal the show and re-focus all the attention on herself.
Other than that I completely missed the point of writing a reply on sucking a fat-asses 'massive balls' and how that relates to the current topic. I tried to understand it as sarcasm, but truth is...it still didnt make any sense. See, it was OUT OF PLACE.
Just my humble opinion.
diesel, I have to disagree. I think ~karma~'s post was all about sarcasm and making fun of BigConehead. I don’t think it was out of place, but whether or not it was overboard is a subjective matter.
And it’s not like she posted this in the middle of a serious thread (as evidenced by my post of Mighty Mouse :). I think it’s okay to let some things slide on this one; but that’s just my opinion.
Yeah, diesel, last time you checked this was ALSO an Off Topic area. You have as much right to post Off Topic thoughts such as what animal can kick what other animal’s ass - as I have to post any damn thing I want. Seeing as the Mods haven’t banned me for all my evilness, I don’t think they give a flying fuck what you want.
And let me get the proper effect here for the “eeeooooowww” of fear in me for possibly getting on your bad side. Don’t know if that translated as well in text as the verbal version would demonstrate. You can call people all the names you want - and so can anybody else - but Heaven forbid I say someone’s an ass. Yeah, whateva.
Regarding stealing the show… I hardly even dented it. Irondoc and many others were much more hilarious than my 2 cents. Were they trying to steal your animal debate’s thunder? Who fuckin’ cares anyway? The very fact that something in you triggered at my post and caused you to give 1.5 seconds of your precious brainpower to considering I might want to hijack the thread says volumes. Volumes for your own issues. And not only did I “succeed” (as if that were my intent if the first place) in hijacking anything, I somehow compelled you to even bother to write this little diatribe. Wow. Hey, maybe I should be sarcastic more often. Some ass out there will accuse me of being inappropriate and attempting to redirect attention to myself and by his bombastic derision I’ll have succeeded again! Mmwaaahhaaahahaa!
Out of place… Eesh. Again, this is an OT forum and your damn animal competition crap is as out of place as my sarcastic ball-licking humor. Grow the fuck up. Live and let live.
No no no no! The Mighty Mouse picture was out of place, and overboard! It just doesn’t belong… and it’s oh so crude.
Humans are physically fragile. Our evolutionary advantage which allows us to dominate the world is intelligence. If you want real power though-- the power of life and death over much of the rest of your own species as well as others-- it will not be acquired through the use of physical size or strength. Real power in the human context lies in the ability to control or direct the actions of others in a hierarchical manner, thus leveraging ones own power. Technology is only a multiplier, albeit an effective one. Incidentally, it is also the product of intelligence, education, and money, three things often found together. Granted, this doesn’t explain why I go to the gym.
I don’t always go for the sex talk, but ~Karma~ was just busting this numbnuts balls. He deserved it. How is a women going to bust chops, not with a 975 bench, but with OOOOOOh Babyy you’re so big, good, smelly, unwashed can I yada yada yada. No need to get offended. I think an off topic message board thread is different than a tmag editorial. Maybe that’s hypocritical, but that’s were I draw the line.
I gotta run Pam Anderson is making naked sushi for me.
Man, GuruX, you are HILARIOUS!!!
Anaceinthehole? Holy crap that’s gold!
Calling me gay? Classic! I hadn’t heard that one since high school!
Man, and I thought Cupcake had a biting wit, but he doesn’t hold a candle to you, gurux…
Another bit, I don’t think ~Karma~ was trying to steal the show, but maybe I was. Why? For God’s sake the guy’s a moron. I’m not going to try to prove him wrong. I have 8 year old twins with more sense. I’m not going to debate some numbnuts on the internet. I’m a doctor. I have a job. I’ve been told I’m way smart all my life. I’m pretty strong, almost good enough to get drilled at nationals in powerlifting if my damn body would hold up. I’ve treated world class athletes at both the Ironman and the Arnold Classic. A guy called me God once after some Ironman magic.
I know who what and where I am. Guys like Bigconan need to be mocked, not debated.
One thing I actually thought was the trap bar, but didn’t act on it. Al Gerard’s the man. Of course it runs in the family.
My dad thought of stuff but never tried to patent ideas. Now I could have been in and out of rehab 8 times and been a total trust fund asswipe if he followed through. Seriously, we’re talking intermittent windshield wipers along with some other cool stuff worth a gazillion or two.
My fiancee is actually very hot, and believe it or not guys, looks a lot like ~Karma~. She’s a huge pain in the ass also, just like our gal. I think she likes me for the hands or something she said. It can’t be my 40 bazillion dollars or 17 1/2" penis, but who knows?
Stupid thread…at best. But some joy did come out of it. Nate Dogg, thank you for the Bigalo quotes. The hug botch line always gets laughs. Good times.