What Do You Think of My Uncle's Feats of Strength?

Off Topic
21

[quote]batman730 wrote:
In somewhat related news, I once tried to move a washing machine which, unbeknownst to me, had water in it. I wondered who had slipped the cryptonite into my jock. [/quote]

Get your usernames straight. Kryptonite is Superman, not Batman. Sheesh. :wink:

Reminds me of the passage in Brooks Kubikā€™s Dinosaur Training, where he tries clean-and-pressing a beer keg partially filled with water. Damn near impossible, even though it weighed far less than the amount of iron he could press. Water is a sneaky motherfucker.

22

[quote]theiceman13 wrote:

[quote]LankyMofo wrote:
Went over this in the other thread. No one can do 2x washing machine naturally.

And your uncle is on some shit. Deal with it. [/quote]

Sounds like you are jeolous to me, maybe your crappy genetics failed you in the strength department that is why you accuse anyone who is stronger then you to be on steroids and ā€˜no one can do 2x washing machineā€™ that dos not make sense.[/quote]

LOL at me being weak. You see these pythons Iā€™m carrying around? Get over yourself, man. Iā€™ve come incredibly close to maxing out my genetic limits and here you are, some anonymous guy on the internet with wonder claims about his uncle in the papers back in the 70s. You think people are going to believe you over me? Give me a break, kid.

23

Stopped reading at 17 stone.

24

[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
AND this weekā€™s wash, [/quote]
There is a sexist joke in here somewhere.

25

[quote]SteelyD wrote:
Not so impressive when you learn what kind of washing machine they were:

Ha ha ha

26

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
AND this weekā€™s wash, [/quote]
There is a sexist joke in here somewhere.
[/quote]

LankyMofo does my laundry.

27

[quote]theiceman13 wrote:

[quote]Steel Nation wrote:

[quote]Varqanir wrote:

[quote]theiceman13 wrote:
My uncle was only 5ft8 but weighed 17 stone also known as 240lbs and was very strong, he could do one arm push ups (apparently sometimes with only two fingers) and he could carry two washing machines (he said they dont weigh that much), he could deadlift a three wheel car with one finger.

One time, some woman had crashed and got stuck in a tree, he moved the car out of the way with his bare hands, he was even in the papers for it.

I made a post like this on bb.com but its full of insecure trolls saying ā€˜stopped reading at 17 stoneā€™ ā€˜17 stone? was he in the middle agesā€™ [/quote]

Pffft. If he were a real man heā€™d have moved the tree out of the way.

Just kidding. Very impressive.

And never mind the trolls. In the United States, people canā€™t even figure out the metric system, let alone any other system of weights and measures that doesnā€™t feature feet and pounds and gallons. [/quote]

Psssssstttā€¦Iā€™m pretty sure heā€™s fucking with us dude.

[quote]strungoutboy21 wrote:
All I can think about when you said feats of strength is Seinfeld and festivus.[/quote]

LOL, same here. I was half-expecting a pic of Jerry Stiller next to a pole.[/quote]

Ok i should of said tests of strength and how the hell am i fucking with yous?[/quote]

I assumed you were making light of all the assholes that go around telling people that lift how they ā€œknew a guyā€ that used to lift 1000 lb and could skin a live wolverine with his teethā€¦AT THE SAME TIME!

But, maybe I gave you too much credit.

Please, continue blowing our minds us with more tales of your uncleā€™s feats of incredible appliance-moving prowess.

28

Fuck you guys and your washing machines, try lifting this, probably too scared, pussies

29

[quote]MattyG35 wrote:
Fuck you guys and your washing machines, try lifting this, probably too scared, pussies

LankyMofo can lift that EASY. No way heā€™s scared to. No way.

30

Iā€™ve seen LankyMofo, dude has to use toast releasers to lift a toaster. Thatā€™s some weak ass shit right there.

31

[quote]MattyG35 wrote:
Iā€™ve seen LankyMofo, dude has to use toast releasers to lift a toaster. Thatā€™s some weak ass shit right there.[/quote]

I donā€™t even know what to say to this. A toaster? What need has LankyMofo of a toaster? Given the muscle mass he carries his basal metabolic rate is sufficient to cook bread if that is his desire.

I can only assume that he was subtly altering the position of the toaster in question in order for it to be more pleasingly arranged, and you misunderstood what you were seeing.

32

[quote]LankyMofo wrote:

[quote]theiceman13 wrote:

[quote]LankyMofo wrote:
Went over this in the other thread. No one can do 2x washing machine naturally.

And your uncle is on some shit. Deal with it. [/quote]

Sounds like you are jeolous to me, maybe your crappy genetics failed you in the strength department that is why you accuse anyone who is stronger then you to be on steroids and ā€˜no one can do 2x washing machineā€™ that dos not make sense.[/quote]

LOL at me being weak. You see these pythons Iā€™m carrying around? Get over yourself, man. Iā€™ve come incredibly close to maxing out my genetic limits and here you are, some anonymous guy on the internet with wonder claims about his uncle in the papers back in the 70s. You think people are going to believe you over me? Give me a break, kid. [/quote]

Boss telescope Lanky. They double pretty well as clothes horses.

33

[quote]blindpirate wrote:

[quote]LankyMofo wrote:

[quote]theiceman13 wrote:

[quote]LankyMofo wrote:
Went over this in the other thread. No one can do 2x washing machine naturally.

And your uncle is on some shit. Deal with it. [/quote]

Sounds like you are jeolous to me, maybe your crappy genetics failed you in the strength department that is why you accuse anyone who is stronger then you to be on steroids and ā€˜no one can do 2x washing machineā€™ that dos not make sense.[/quote]

LOL at me being weak. You see these pythons Iā€™m carrying around? Get over yourself, man. Iā€™ve come incredibly close to maxing out my genetic limits and here you are, some anonymous guy on the internet with wonder claims about his uncle in the papers back in the 70s. You think people are going to believe you over me? Give me a break, kid. [/quote]

Boss telescope Lanky. They double pretty well as clothes horses.[/quote]

Thatā€™s a high powered microscope so he can look at hisā€¦micro-penis.

34

[quote]EmilyQ wrote:

[quote]MattyG35 wrote:
Iā€™ve seen LankyMofo, dude has to use toast releasers to lift a toaster. Thatā€™s some weak ass shit right there.[/quote]

I donā€™t even know what to say to this. A toaster? What need has LankyMofo of a toaster? Given the muscle mass he carries his basal metabolic rate is sufficient to cook bread if that is his desire.

I can only assume that he was subtly altering the position of the toaster in question in order for it to be more pleasingly arranged, and you misunderstood what you were seeing.[/quote]

Lanky Mofo is a national champion at feng shui.

35

338Ɨ507 104 KB

[quote]spar4tee wrote:
How does someone even carry two washing machines? Did he stack them? Is he Mr. Fantastic?[/quote]

Like this

36

[quote]MattyG35 wrote:

[quote]blindpirate wrote:

[quote]LankyMofo wrote:

[quote]theiceman13 wrote:

[quote]LankyMofo wrote:
Went over this in the other thread. No one can do 2x washing machine naturally.

And your uncle is on some shit. Deal with it. [/quote]

Sounds like you are jeolous to me, maybe your crappy genetics failed you in the strength department that is why you accuse anyone who is stronger then you to be on steroids and ā€˜no one can do 2x washing machineā€™ that dos not make sense.[/quote]

LOL at me being weak. You see these pythons Iā€™m carrying around? Get over yourself, man. Iā€™ve come incredibly close to maxing out my genetic limits and here you are, some anonymous guy on the internet with wonder claims about his uncle in the papers back in the 70s. You think people are going to believe you over me? Give me a break, kid. [/quote]

Boss telescope Lanky. They double pretty well as clothes horses.[/quote]

Thatā€™s a high powered microscope so he can look at hisā€¦micro-penis.[/quote]

Where do you live, bro? Iā€™ve got 5 grand that says you wouldnā€™t say that to my face.

37

[quote]LankyMofo wrote:

[quote]MattyG35 wrote:

[quote]blindpirate wrote:

[quote]LankyMofo wrote:

[quote]theiceman13 wrote:

[quote]LankyMofo wrote:
Went over this in the other thread. No one can do 2x washing machine naturally.

And your uncle is on some shit. Deal with it. [/quote]

Sounds like you are jeolous to me, maybe your crappy genetics failed you in the strength department that is why you accuse anyone who is stronger then you to be on steroids and ā€˜no one can do 2x washing machineā€™ that dos not make sense.[/quote]

LOL at me being weak. You see these pythons Iā€™m carrying around? Get over yourself, man. Iā€™ve come incredibly close to maxing out my genetic limits and here you are, some anonymous guy on the internet with wonder claims about his uncle in the papers back in the 70s. You think people are going to believe you over me? Give me a break, kid. [/quote]

Boss telescope Lanky. They double pretty well as clothes horses.[/quote]

Thatā€™s a high powered microscope so he can look at hisā€¦micro-penis.[/quote]

Where do you live, bro? Iā€™ve got 5 grand that says you wouldnā€™t say that to my face.[/quote]

Even if you could whoop my ass, Itā€™d be worth the 5 large to drive down to philly and say that to you.

38

[quote]Testy1 wrote:

[quote]spar4tee wrote:
How does someone even carry two washing machines? Did he stack them? Is he Mr. Fantastic?[/quote]

Like this[/quote]
Those are some narrow washing machines.

39

[quote]LankyMofo wrote:

[quote]MattyG35 wrote:

[quote]blindpirate wrote:

[quote]LankyMofo wrote:

[quote]theiceman13 wrote:

[quote]LankyMofo wrote:
Went over this in the other thread. No one can do 2x washing machine naturally.

And your uncle is on some shit. Deal with it. [/quote]

Sounds like you are jeolous to me, maybe your crappy genetics failed you in the strength department that is why you accuse anyone who is stronger then you to be on steroids and ā€˜no one can do 2x washing machineā€™ that dos not make sense.[/quote]

LOL at me being weak. You see these pythons Iā€™m carrying around? Get over yourself, man. Iā€™ve come incredibly close to maxing out my genetic limits and here you are, some anonymous guy on the internet with wonder claims about his uncle in the papers back in the 70s. You think people are going to believe you over me? Give me a break, kid. [/quote]

Boss telescope Lanky. They double pretty well as clothes horses.[/quote]

Thatā€™s a high powered microscope so he can look at hisā€¦micro-penis.[/quote]

Where do you live, bro? Iā€™ve got 5 grand that says you wouldnā€™t say that to my face.[/quote]

Oh yeah, you wanna have bro down?
Micro-penis got you insecure?

40

[quote]MattyG35 wrote:

[quote]LankyMofo wrote:

[quote]MattyG35 wrote:

[quote]blindpirate wrote:

[quote]LankyMofo wrote:

[quote]theiceman13 wrote:

[quote]LankyMofo wrote:
Went over this in the other thread. No one can do 2x washing machine naturally.

And your uncle is on some shit. Deal with it. [/quote]

Sounds like you are jeolous to me, maybe your crappy genetics failed you in the strength department that is why you accuse anyone who is stronger then you to be on steroids and ā€˜no one can do 2x washing machineā€™ that dos not make sense.[/quote]

LOL at me being weak. You see these pythons Iā€™m carrying around? Get over yourself, man. Iā€™ve come incredibly close to maxing out my genetic limits and here you are, some anonymous guy on the internet with wonder claims about his uncle in the papers back in the 70s. You think people are going to believe you over me? Give me a break, kid. [/quote]

Boss telescope Lanky. They double pretty well as clothes horses.[/quote]

Thatā€™s a high powered microscope so he can look at hisā€¦micro-penis.[/quote]

Where do you live, bro? Iā€™ve got 5 grand that says you wouldnā€™t say that to my face.[/quote]

Oh yeah, you wanna have bro down?
Micro-penis got you insecure?[/quote]

Thunderdome???