I think you reach an age somewhere north of 30 when you begin to enjoy reading for self-punishment. Not all of the time, but some of the time. Even so, I’ll go ahead and strike this one from my reading list based on your review.
It can feel really good to shit on something people think shouldn’t be shat upon, behead a sacred cow or just call bullshit when you see or smell bullshit.
Wait…are you saying I did this, in being irritated by a daughter’s grief?
Can you expand upon this? Off the bat it doesn’t resonate with me, but I tend to trust you, so wonder if I’m missing something.
I really only developed an issue with H Mart in the last third or quarter of the book, and again, it pushed known buttons for me. (But I actually don’t think that’s why I became irritated. I blame the author completely, and am only offering that it could be me to be magnanimous.)
Aw, I’m sorry it wasn’t your cup of tea. I probably am biased toward the author, plus I am a sucker for books whose narrators feel split between two countries.
I can see how the international trip near the end might not sit well with some readers. It’s funny you mention her dad because that was my main concern with the book; I realize that Zauner’s relationship with her mother was the centerpiece, but I wanted to learn more about her father. It felt like a little too much information was missing.
I’ve lost more than one mother not to death but rather ambiguous loss, so it is possible that I am desensitized to it all. Maybe you’d think I’m narcissistic.
Hopefully that doesn’t come off as me defending why I like the book; that would make me feel silly. All in all, the mediocre and unlikable books make the ones we adore worth it.
No, no, not at all! In fact, I worried after I came in so hot yesterday that you’d feel like I threw shade in your direction.
And again, not at all. My mother left me with my emotionally crippled father and assaultive older brother when I was 12, then died when I was 21. I was perfectly willing to join Zauner in her antagonism toward her critical, controlling mother in the early part of the book, but the switch to super-duper devoted daughter (actually, my mother is my WORLD!) was not adequately explained to me, so felt immature or shallow. Also, upon reflection, was the mother really explained?
But here I am, having an emotional reaction and deeply considering the book, which means it was a worthwhile read.
It was more how the exceptionally narcissistic comment struck me. It’s okay. I like reading that sort of criticism. Let it rip!
Reading for self-punishment (a subjective term I made up last night, btw) can take a few different forms. Slogging your way through an exceptionally narcissistic memoir falls into that category for me.
Another adventure in reading for self-punishment I have on my list is to re-read A People’s History of The United States 20 years after I was enamored by it as a young socialist. I’m much more mature, much more well-read on history and much (in my opinion, of course) more politically aware than I was in my early 20’s. I’m not expecting a fun read.
In anticipation for the new Amazon Lord of the Rings series I just re-read JRR Tolkien’s The Silmarillion, which takes some work. It’s not the same kind of page-turner that The Lord of The Rings or The Hobbit is, but the pedantic nature of it is precisely what fleshes out the entire universe Tolkien created for us. I just really, really hope Amazon doesn’t go woke with this or sex it up a’la Game of Thrones. All I hope is that they follow the Peter Jackson formula from the first three movies and honor Tolkien’s life’s work by making a faithful adaptation.
Next up for me is David Goggin’s Can’t Hurt Me. I’m not expecting a fun story there, either.
@Bagsy @violar I finished Together We Will Go - I really liked it! Lots of different perspectives and things to think about surrounding a difficult subject. Overall a good read.
Started The Husbands by Chandler Baker
This doesn’t resonate with me either. I’m far less likely to stick with books I don’t enjoy than when I was younger. I have far less time to be annoyed with stuff.
Immortality–Milan Kundera One of the few books I reread from time to time.
Nah, life’s too short to get upset about other’s opinions on books. Plus I think your critique is fair.
Oh my, I’m so sorry.
Yeah, this was a bit strange, but I guess I found it more fascinating than aggravating. She didn’t paint her father in a positive light, and like me, is an only child, so maybe she felt it was her duty to drop everything and care for her mother because no one else would. I, however, don’t feel like I owe that to my parents. I don’t think that Zauner depicted their early relationship as worse than it really was. Maybe reviving her cultural roots played a role. I also think it is not uncommon for a parent and child to suddenly start getting along better after university years or whenever they have a few years of separation.
Zauner sometimes speculated on the origins of her mother’s behavior, but I don’t feel that she wrote this book to explain her.
Sweet, I’ll pick it up sometime soon. I have a stack of books already begging to be read lol
I’m shopping for books again, so I’m carefully poring over prize lists and NYT bestsellers and “recommended for you” and so on. I check into Together We Will Go (maybe, maybe) and then downloaded an Anthony Doerr and an Elisabeth Strout, then realize that the latter mentions the title character of another book returning. Okay, I think, I should read that first. So I go to get it and get this message:
You purchased this item on January 30, 2016.
But I can’t find it, and don’t remember reading it. But I’ve definitely looked at it before. I need to clean out my Kindle. I have stuff in there I’m never going to read, or have already read and have no intention of reading again. It’s like I’ve lost an important work email.
It’s like my life is a chaotic mess suddenly. This never happens with bookcases. I can always find what I’m looking for on a book shelf.
I am in literary crisis. I am reading nothing. My life is bereft of a current book, and I have a doctor’s appointment this afternoon, so will endure waiting room time without any fortification.
HOWEVER, after my journey into my kindle content, I want to recommend Shuggie Bain by Douglas Stuart - a Booker Prize winner - and Eleanor Oliphant Is Completely Fine by Gail Honeyman. Those two were standouts. Also, which I mentioned upthread, All the Light We Cannot See, by Anthony Doerr - Pulitzer Prize winner. It left me breathless.
Eleanor Oliphant was light, as I recall, but it’s been a while. I was sad that it ended and the author hadn’t written anything else.
I want to very cautiously recommend a book to you. (I say cautiously because it is emotionally heavy going.) Essentially the protagonist suffers from severe OCD and agoraphobia as a result of being a victim of abuse. It was the first time I felt I understood what was going on inside the head of someone in that situation.
“Into The Darkest Corner” by Elizabeth Haynes.
Edit @EmilyQ because you enjoyed Eleanor Oliphant
The Booker Prize winners are almost always great. Best book award in my mind.
You have my sympathy.
Ehh… to each their own…
Your opinion? Or EmilyQ/Pulitzer? Hmmm, hard choice…
Oh, to be young and to know everything.
I’m entitled to my opinion of the book
Emily is entitled to hers.
It’s an opinion.
And I’m entitled to my opinion of your opinion.
Yes you are. Sorry I got defensive