[quote]cap’nsalty wrote:
I think probably the worst was the time I walked into the locker room and there was this naked middle aged man drying his hair under one of those hand dryers that blows hot air.[/quote]
Aghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!
I stopped using those automatic hand dryers when I saw a pubic hair stuck on it. After that it was good old paper towels or just my shirt
[quote]Aleksandr wrote:
You should have seen the happiness on the fat girls face! She thought she might actually get to date this great guy she just met. She’d done everything right! There were no awkward silences, the had so much in common, she was outgoing but not intrusive, and she showed him she is totally into fitness too! What she didn’t know is he’s gay.[/quote]
NO, NO. She knew he WAS gay. She charmed him out of it. He’ll call.
The PT (wrestling coach) at my gym teaching his wrestlers that machines are the best for strength and size…we constantly argue, but he’s a fuckin retard
Happened when I lived in Mn too. Had one guy who trained in jeans and cowboy boots. Could bench about 415 lbs and his squat and deadlift together could not equal his bench.
Always had his hot wife there with the pet ferret.
[quote]holifila wrote:
Here in Texas I have come across many ‘cowboy lifters’. They work out in a button-down shirt, tight wranglers, and boots.
There is only one where I am at now but he always brings a smile to my face.[/quote]
Uh…the entire gym at my school is funny!
$400,000 worth of brand new junk, er, I mean Nautilus equipment, including a seated dip machine.
Not one single cable lat pull down machine, cable row machine, olympic platform, glute ham raise, bumper plate, band, or chain.
Not so much funny I guess as fucking pathetic.
I’m so glad I have my own home gym…
A guy wearing a pink shirt while curling in the squatrack. At least the collar wasn’t turned up.
Give him a month or two when it gets a lil colder, his collar should be up by then
There is a guy who comes in on the same days that work I out and it seems I can change days and he still shows up.Walks into the weight room goes to the cybex seated leg press walks sroung and gets every 45 pounder in the place loads up to about 950 does three sets of three or four reps never releases the dog moves the load about three inches and asks about every other time when are they gonna get more weight since he uses all the 45s they have .Then he goes back downstairs to teh rest cybex machines and does the rest of his workout. DRIVES ME INSANE AND IM ALLREADY A LITTLE BENT
This isn’t all that weird, but it was unusual. A couple walked in, obviously tweaking on Crystal Methamphetamine, and if you’ve seen this, imagine the jolt someone on crack has and multiply this by 150. It was 2am after I got off work and I was the only person in the gym. They were so high that they have a hard time figuring out how to load the weights onto the leg press machine, they were acting very erratically, jittery and hyperactive. The front desk guy comes in and shoos them out, saying they weren’t members. A few minutes later, they come in again, and are shooed out. Then they come in again. So I decide to leave and as I am getting into the car, police cars pull in. Strange.
Once I saw a large poop on the floor by the free weights during these wee hours. Hmm. Then a couple days later I see a sign asking for any information regarding a serial turd leaver in the gym.
There’s also a huge guy- around 6’9", maybe 390 pounds of pure muscle- who when leaving stops at the entrance and in his loud booming voice, says the Lord’s Prayer and then says thank you God and to everyone for the opportunity to train. Sometimes people who aren’t familiar with him who are training near the entrance are unexpectedly startled (they jump) when he starts shouting, but no one says anything to him because he’s the hugest, most imposing looking guy. Once when saying his thank you’s, he even thanked the pretty girls walking by for inspiration.
[quote]AbunaiE wrote:
But, the strangest of all is the guy that has a HUGE chest and is missing triceps. I dont understand the mechanics at work here. Genetic freak perhaps?
[/quote]
Or, perhaps, pec implants.
[quote]chinadoll wrote:
Once I saw a large poop on the floor by the free weights during these wee hours. Hmm. Then a couple days later I see a sign asking for any information regarding a serial turd leaver in the gym.
[/quote]
LMFAO
Turds???
That’s just sick!!!
Hey carpenter480, we have that guy in our gym too, thankfully he is gone now, felt like inserting one of the 45lb plates where the sun don't shine.
[quote]~karma~ wrote:
At my 24Hr we have the “Interpretive Workout Dude”. If you can imagine someone doing artsy-fartsy-stupid-ass interpretive dancing and combine that with the worst form known to mankind for everything you’ll have a pretty good idea of what he looks like.
Easiest exercise to describe would be his Interpretive Dips. Picture the guy… youngish… slender… wearing tights and a sweatshirt facing a dip station. Hands on the bars, head and back bowed as though attempting to form a “C” with his body. Then, he leaps into his Interpretive Dip arching his back dramatically and throwing his head back so his body forms a reverse “C”. He holds this posture for a brief second and then collapses back into his starting position “C”. After a few warm up reps, he bangs these things out quickly yet maintains his dramatic pauses in the forward and backward “C” positions.
People watching is about the only thing that makes cardio tolerable.[/quote]
Heh. I’ve got one of these dudes at my gym. Every time I see him, I halfway expect to hear Irene Cara sing the theme to ‘Fame’. Or the old Flashdance tune, ‘Maniac’.
[quote]There’s also a huge guy- around 6’9", maybe 390 pounds of pure muscle- who when leaving stops at the entrance and in his loud booming voice, says the Lord’s Prayer and then says thank you God and to everyone for the opportunity to train. Sometimes people who aren’t familiar with him who are training near the entrance are unexpectedly startled (they jump) when he starts shouting, but no one says anything to him because he’s the hugest, most imposing looking guy. Once when saying his thank you’s, he even thanked the pretty girls walking by for inspiration.
[/quote]
Haha. From your description, he sounds like a really nice guy!
“Always had his hot wife there with the pet ferret.”
Could someone explain to me precisely why that sentence made me spit water all over myself?
[quote]AbunaiE wrote:
Then there is the big guy who comes in, walks around the gym for 5 minutes, stretches for 10, picks up weights and twists them 20 times and leaves. All while wearing a plastic suit and kamikaze headband.
e[/quote]
Must be getting psyched up for suicide bombing.
(If you know Japanese culture you would understand this)
Geek boy
[quote]Jake Lonefox wrote:
There’s also a huge guy- around 6’9", maybe 390 pounds of pure muscle- who when leaving stops at the entrance and in his loud booming voice, says the Lord’s Prayer and then says thank you God and to everyone for the opportunity to train. Sometimes people who aren’t familiar with him who are training near the entrance are unexpectedly startled (they jump) when he starts shouting, but no one says anything to him because he’s the hugest, most imposing looking guy. Once when saying his thank you’s, he even thanked the pretty girls walking by for inspiration.
Haha. From your description, he sounds like a really nice guy!
[/quote]
Seriously, I can imagine Bud Jeffries doing that!
Geek boy
At a 24hr fitness, this middle age, short, balding, chunky guy would come in wearing SHORT running shorts, a sleeveless t-shirt that didn’t even cover his belly, a head band, and knee high white socks. He never lifted anything, just practiced really poorly executed karate moves.