She spotted me on bench the other day. I had a nightmare last night.
This one asked me to give it a spot. I told it to go fuck itself and tried to drop a 45lb weight on its head. It got away.
The dip station at my gym. It’s a retarded assisted dip/pullup station. The grips are extreemly small so they dig into your hands and it’s about 4 feet off the ground (you actualy have to climb steps to get to it). If you wanted to drop down during a set you would almost certainly get tangled up in the step or the assist bar. If you don’t get tangled up in either of those you will probably hurt your ankle from the long drop or the bar that attaches the retarded step ladder.
A broken watch and blood all over the mirrors in the locker room.
Gays are scary. You never know if they left AIDS on the equipment that they were using.
today i was at the gym and some guy comes in all puffy chest does a few laps around the weight area scoping everything out. then he goes to the squat rack. first he sets up so that hes squatting outside the rack without the bars to catch him or the weight if he falls. Then he starts doing his warmup set with the bar, it was a half squat half good morning i thought maybe he was trying to strecth.
then he loads on 185 figured ok hell be fine. and he starts to squat again and bam half and half but it was completely not the intended movement. it hurt to watch him lift this weight. then after every set he would cringe and grab his knees like he was gonna die. I felt like i should say something but then i didnt.
Old decaying women standing one legged on fucking balance balls 2 feet away from me while I’m deadlifting. I’m always terrified they’re going to lose their balance, fall onto me and get us both killed.
[quote]Chalky09Aus wrote:
There is this nuts dude in my gym that is pretty big but has crazy beady darting eyes and chews gum INTENSELY and i mean intense. He stares around like this, im kind of just waiting for him to snap and maul someone.
[/quote]
This made me crack up.
There’s a weird guy who just shakes a medicine ball, continuously, for up to 10 minutes at a time. He always seems to be doing this whenever I’m deadlifting, so I fear one of these days he’s going to lose his grip and send a medicine ball in my direction half way through a lift.
I bet we both look at each other thinking “What the hell is that exercise supposed to do?”.
[quote]pf wrote:
Dools wrote:
When the strange old naked guy in the locker room took pictures of me. Told me he was scouting for models. Starting to doubt that now. Scary
Holy fuck man, you’ve waited almost 3 years to make your first post[/quote]
Took me 3 years of telling myself I could. Now it’s done, no stopping me.
Other thing I find quite disturbing more than scary, and this is true. There is a guy in my gym, must be in his 60’s, but takes false teeth out before every set and puts them ontop of his training log, then puts them back in inbetween sets.
[quote]yusef wrote:
A bloke who puts around 200kg on the bar, and deadlifts with a fairly rounded back, then when he approaches lockout he starts madly humping the bar to get it up. Really upsets me.
[/quote]
Sorry about that bro.
[quote]Nikiforos wrote:
yusef wrote:
A bloke who puts around 200kg on the bar, and deadlifts with a fairly rounded back, then when he approaches lockout he starts madly humping the bar to get it up. Really upsets me.
Sorry about that bro.[/quote]
yea, he wishes the bloke would madly hump him instead, so he “can get it up”.
Beavers, beavers in gym locker rooms.
[quote]skyel7 wrote:
Beavers, beavers in gym locker rooms.[/quote]
Furry ones, yes. The bald kind I generally find inviting.
[quote]skyel7 wrote:
Beavers, beavers in gym locker rooms.[/quote]
Damn, you should get one of those sonic emitters that scare moles away from Sharper Image. Maybe it’ll work.
my coach scared me when i was a freshman cuz his 300 pound ass would get pissed
like if you didnt put your weights up and you put them on the wrong way. or if you were horsing around
he would take the 1’s that were put up and throw 45’s across the fuckin weightroom and scream and throw some 25’s and yell
lol i love him now though
when i read bears i almost lost it lol.
i take it you mean the bears you see reading books in starbucks
[quote]countingbeans wrote:
skyel7 wrote:
Beavers, beavers in gym locker rooms.
Furry ones, yes. The bald kind I generally find inviting.
[/quote]
I don’t think so, beans. These ones have not been airbrushed…talk about unrefined.
Especially the ones that come with the accompanying mammaries that hang so low, you’d mistake them for a pair of eyes.
lmao
[quote]skyel7 wrote:
countingbeans wrote:
skyel7 wrote:
Beavers, beavers in gym locker rooms.
Furry ones, yes. The bald kind I generally find inviting.
I don’t think so, beans. These ones have not been airbrushed…talk about unrefined.
Especially the ones that come with the accompanying mammaries that hang so low, you’d mistake them for a pair of eyes.[/quote]
lol, you mean flapjacks? Fried egg titties?
I went to Aruba, and you can go topless there. Well you would think that would be cool right? FUCK NO. I do not want to see some old lady without a shirt on. I mean I don’t need to watch some old ass woman kick her tits down the beach when I’m trying to enjoy a cuban and a good book.
And it doesn’t have to be airbrushed. I’m a realist, minor stubble and a few ingrowns won’t bother me. Shit I’ll give ya the $80 to get a Brazilian. Just please god no jungle bush, please god no.
But yeah, I won’t even piss in the locker room if I can hold it until I get home. Those places are a haven for freaks and weirdos.