Still struggling with balance. It’s really, really difficult to be constantly weighing if the effort/time put into my family/job/hobbies is correct and trying to maximize the input-output ratio for each.
It was sooo much easier when I was single and could just focus all my energy on one or two things. I miss being able to focus on 1 thing, busting my ass to improve, and seeing how I could maximize those results. But now, everything is such a compromise.
Keep fighting the good fight!
What would you like in return? No sarcasm or anything intended.
If you’re analytical and like to weigh these things out, weigh them out.
Like, if you went from zero (never owned a bike in your life) to mountain biker in the last couple months, where would you expect yourself to be?
Same with parenting. You’ve been at it now for a couple months. You’re probably pretty good at bottles, diapers, nap time & puke.
Thats pretty good. Thats the meat and potatoes of the next couple of years.
The rest of it gets figured out in motion.
It’s a tough slog man
My 2 toddlers consume every waking moment of my life. Sometimes I have moments where I stare into space thinking ‘what the fuck happened to my life’ 
It’s definitely tough when little ones enter the picture. You got this.
Personally I had to set boundaries at work that I will not work more than 50 hours/week unless there are very rare circumstances. It’s how I try to maximize my family time.
I have also scaled back on putting so much emphasis on a strict workout schedule (hence why I usually go in for a hypertrophy split and kind of make it up as I go).
Now that my youngest two are 4 and nearly 6, it is getting easier to enjoy things with them instead of just taking care of them. (Not having to change any more diapers is a great feeling).
Common thought to most fathers/family men I think.
I think this stays unchanged until kids are old enough to drive - and even then it might not be the case. My daughter is 5 and it’s a constant balancing act between my needs and that of my family… I found the only time I have to be able to work out is if I cut it directly from my sleep schedule. (Training takes about 90 mins, and I sleep about 6.5 hours; it’s not coincidence.)
Right now, because you’ve got an infant in the house, expect everything to be on fire and you’ve got the only water source… This gets better, but it doesn’t go away. Finding this balance between what you need to be the man you want to be (and who your family needs you to be) is difficult and ever-changing. But figuring out what that something is you need to do so you can still feel like you can help priortize your time accordingly.
P.S If you have a support system (family or trusted friends), try to lean on them here and there when you can. Especially if you have parents nearby - they almost always want to spend time with the rugrats.
ALL THE TIME!
How many of you guys feel like you have support systems? Large network of friends or nearby family?
Hey Jshaving! Haven’t seen u around bud.
I have a great one. My parents and in-laws (including brothers-in-law) bend over backward for my children. My across-the-street neighbors provide some help too, and the woman spontaneously buys gifts for them.
They sleep over my in-laws house on a near bi-weekly basis on weekends and they watch them two nights per week. My mom comes by every week and who knows how much she voluntarily has shelled out for all of us so far.
My four year old son has a huge attachment to his granddad, always following him around and trying to help him do chores and projects (he says he works for him).
We also have play dates with friends and the church has several events for families throughout the year and families stay around after mass with their children.
I’m also part of a homeschooling fathers group.
We are also very festive people, especially during the summer time. So there are frequently people around. For my son’s first birthday there were 80 people over. While I don’t intentionally try to be Mr. Popular, I believe being connected to other people is very important and believe social isolation in children is really bad.
The nearest relative me/my wife have is 1500 miles away, the rest are 3000 miles away. Don’t have many friends where we’re at either 
I am in the same boat. It’s hard to get away and just speak to adults sometimes (and that is definitely needed).
My next door neighbor is pretty helpful, but no family.
Sister in law lives around the corner which is a blessing and a curse. Doing a nannyshare with a family one house down, and have numerous neighbors with young kids. We live a block away from the elementary school so it attracts young families. Also have a couple similar level coworkers with young kids.
Both our parents live multiple states away, though they all manage to visit every couple months (inlaws are airline pilots so it’s free and easy).
Very grateful for all those people when we need them. It always feels like they want to help more than I want help.
Large - no.
Complete - yes.
We have a few family members and friends that we can count on. Maybe 10 people we can 100% call on when ever.
I have a 3 year old daughter, its been a fun and challenging time. both learning about how to raise a kid as well as work together with my wife.
i usually wake up and head straight to work before she awakes. once done, i rush home and play with my daughter for an hour (sometimes only having dinner after she sleeps, about 8-9pm). after which i clean up the house till 10pm and head to sleep. i wonder when this cycle will end, if it ever will
I am a new parent.
I have a 17 month old little girl and a baby boy due in 2 weeks. I joined a family gym too, and she enjoys going with me 4-5 days a week to play with the other kids in the day care there.
I am blessed to have a sister that I can pay to watch my little ones until they are school age.
My life is drastically different from just 5 years ago, but I am thoroughly enjoying my little one. I never thought I would have this nor deserve it. I am doing my best to soak up every second I can with my children.
Daughter has been trying to lift weights with me and according to the wife, they’ve been working out in the home gym. At gymnastics they were having a pull-up (assisted) competition and she came in 2nd place in her class, despite her being 2 years younger than the class average.
This makes me happy
Anyone else have recent Dad-wins?
My daughter who just turned 6 last week started reading everything insight. Road signs, books, food labels, even trying to read the closed captions on the TV (yes, my wife and I watch with closed captions - I have 3 kids after all). Also, she had pink eye last week and took the eye drops better than most adults I know.
not a dad, but my dad deserves a HUGE shoutout
My “team” and I wanted a keepsake so we designed a necklace and I asked dad if he knew someone who could get it made.
I expected him to put it on the backburner. Instead, he immediately contacted an artist, and checked in regularly. This is despite (as I later found out) having a major investor meeting that same weekend.
Also, yesterday was a HUGE anniversary for his company.
My kids both did the Fran WOD today after I did it. One with a 10kg plate the other with a 5.
The elder one did pull ups proper as well.
It’s nice when kids copy their dads.