[quote]joutmez wrote:
I think this is the most opportune moment for me to rid myself of the guilt I’ve been carrying for about six months now. My dear younger brother, who is of the tender age of 13, smashed his balls frolicking with his friends in the school yard, play hop scotch or four square I believe. His balls swelled up to roughly the size an orange which is large for a 13 year old sack of testes. Needless to say I deemed my brother a soft little fairy due to his obsession tranny porn and proceeded to nut tap him every time I walked by him in the family domicile. I had hoped that as the pain of being nut tapped entered his body his fairy like qualities would be forced to exit to make room for the pain.
Now I honestly believed he was just being a fairy and complaining as most fairies do but to my shameful dismay he was taken to the ER after about a week of constant nut tapping. His nuts were bruised to a purple hue and my nut tapping only exacerbated his condition. So the docs daignosis was a mild case of orchitis and he should be tip top in two weeks. To cope with the pain they gave him a bottle of hydrocodone syzurrp.
Now this the truly shameful part because he was really in a lot of physical pain. So after having one dose of the syzurrp and dosing of to sleep. I stealthy tip toe my way to our kitchen and pour the entire bottle of syzurrp in a mcdonalds cup filled with sprite. I throw in a few jolly ranchers and spent the next thirty minutes drinking my euphoric concoction. To further add to my shame I took a bottle of dayquil and emptied its contents in the now drained bottle of syzurrp to cover for my theft. Weeks passed and no one was the wiser.
I felt good for all of thirty minutes before I regretted my decesion. Paranoia subtly crawled into the dark recesses as I began to wonder if my body could cope with the 4500 mgs that cohabitation the syzurp bottle with the hydrocodone. I was reluctant to go to sleep fearful that I may never wake. So I forced myself to stay awake for the rest of the night. I blame three 6. Anyways that is it. Glad that is off my chest. [/quote]
[quote]PimpBot5000 wrote:
When I fly, I always take the aisle seat. My shoulders are wide enough that my deltoids protrude into the aisle - certainly not bragging rights considering how small airplane seats are these days.
I get a pathetic, cheap thrill every time a stewardess rubs her thigh or ass against my shoulder and upper arm. It happens at least 10 times a flight (Have to be careful to retract the shoulder any time a token fatty stewardess clomps on by though)[/quote]
Do you try to judge what your chances are with a given hostess based on how often/with which body part/how bruskly she rubs against your shoulder, or is that just me?
My confession is that I got in from the pub the other night and listened to this song at least 5 times in a row:
This may be everyone but I can watch a sad movie about a human dying and be as happy as ever. But if a animal dies, especially a dog, I feel very sad and pissed.
[quote]farmerson12 wrote:
This may be everyone but I can watch a sad movie about a human dying and be as happy as ever. But if a animal dies, especially a dog, I feel very sad and pissed. [/quote]
I feel this way about real people and real animals. People dying? Eh, whatever. But when an animal I own or know well dies, I’m way more bummed out. I think it’s because I pretty much always like animals, except for the dog that I admitted to taking in pleasure in beating the shit out of and the dog that I ejaculated onto out of spite. In general, animals simply don’t piss me off at all, whereas people do so all the time. Half the people I know who have died I was partially happy to see them go.
[quote]farmerson12 wrote:
This may be everyone but I can watch a sad movie about a human dying and be as happy as ever. But if a animal dies, especially a dog, I feel very sad and pissed. [/quote]
I feel this way about real people and real animals. People dying? Eh, whatever. But when an animal I own or know well dies, I’m way more bummed out. I think it’s because I pretty much always like animals, except for the dog that I admitted to taking in pleasure in beating the shit out of and the dog that I ejaculated onto out of spite. In general, animals simply don’t piss me off at all, whereas people do so all the time. Half the people I know who have died I was partially happy to see them go.[/quote]
Get some help, Bert. Your train is off the track, pal.[/quote]
This is what happens to people who go to 12-step programs. One fucked up person guided by another fucked up person. The end result: a fucked up person whose only normalcy resides in an obsessive avoidance of drugs and liquor.
This is one of the best topics I’ve ever read. I gotta sit down and add my own confessions, but frankly I don’t even have the balls to admit some of them even on the net.
[quote]Rattler wrote:
This is one of the best topics I’ve ever read. I gotta sit down and add my own confessions, but frankly I don’t even have the balls to admit some of them even on the net. [/quote]
C’mon now. I’m sure someone here has done something worse than a few tranny orgies now and then.
[quote]Rattler wrote:
This is one of the best topics I’ve ever read. I gotta sit down and add my own confessions, but frankly I don’t even have the balls to admit some of them even on the net. [/quote]
C’mon now. I’m sure someone here has done something worse than a few tranny orgies now and then.
[/quote]
That was you ripsaw? I heard about that tranny orgy party from ID, but did not know it was you.
[quote]Rattler wrote:
This is one of the best topics I’ve ever read. I gotta sit down and add my own confessions, but frankly I don’t even have the balls to admit some of them even on the net. [/quote]
C’mon now. I’m sure someone here has done something worse than a few tranny orgies now and then.
[/quote]
That was you ripsaw? I heard about that tranny orgy party from ID, but did not know it was you.[/quote]
I hear there’s a lot of shit-play in those orgies.
[quote]Rattler wrote:
This is one of the best topics I’ve ever read. I gotta sit down and add my own confessions, but frankly I don’t even have the balls to admit some of them even on the net. [/quote]
C’mon now. I’m sure someone here has done something worse than a few tranny orgies now and then.
[/quote]
That was you ripsaw? I heard about that tranny orgy party from ID, but did not know it was you.[/quote]
I hear there’s a lot of shit-play in those orgies.[/quote]
How do you know? Oh, I get it, you were the other person ID was telling me about.
[quote]Rattler wrote:
This is one of the best topics I’ve ever read. I gotta sit down and add my own confessions, but frankly I don’t even have the balls to admit some of them even on the net. [/quote]
C’mon now. I’m sure someone here has done something worse than a few tranny orgies now and then.
[/quote]
That was you ripsaw? I heard about that tranny orgy party from ID, but did not know it was you.[/quote]
I hear there’s a lot of shit-play in those orgies.[/quote]
How do you know? Oh, I get it, you were the other person ID was telling me about.[/quote]
[quote]Rattler wrote:
This is one of the best topics I’ve ever read. I gotta sit down and add my own confessions, but frankly I don’t even have the balls to admit some of them even on the net. [/quote]
C’mon now. I’m sure someone here has done something worse than a few tranny orgies now and then.
[/quote]
That was you ripsaw? I heard about that tranny orgy party from ID, but did not know it was you.[/quote]
I hear there’s a lot of shit-play in those orgies.[/quote]
[quote]Rattler wrote:
This is one of the best topics I’ve ever read. I gotta sit down and add my own confessions, but frankly I don’t even have the balls to admit some of them even on the net. [/quote]
C’mon now. I’m sure someone here has done something worse than a few tranny orgies now and then.
[/quote]
That was you ripsaw? I heard about that tranny orgy party from ID, but did not know it was you.[/quote]
I hear there’s a lot of shit-play in those orgies.[/quote]
How do you know? Oh, I get it, you were the other person ID was telling me about.[/quote]
You like hearing stories about transvestite sex?[/quote]
[quote]Rattler wrote:
This is one of the best topics I’ve ever read. I gotta sit down and add my own confessions, but frankly I don’t even have the balls to admit some of them even on the net. [/quote]
C’mon now. I’m sure someone here has done something worse than a few tranny orgies now and then.
[/quote]
That was you ripsaw? I heard about that tranny orgy party from ID, but did not know it was you.[/quote]
I hear there’s a lot of shit-play in those orgies.[/quote]
How do you know? Oh, I get it, you were the other person ID was telling me about.[/quote]
You like hearing stories about transvestite sex?[/quote]
