From what I understand, most men struggle with being “friendzoned” and would envy your position, just like how a majority of people struggle to lose weight and would love to be in a position to “struggle to gain weight”
Wow, enviable is the last word I would use to describe my situation. To be completely honest, socially, this is the most miserable I’ve ever been in my life.
I currently have zero female friends, and there’s an energy that’s just missing there you can’t get from your guy friends in trying to maintain a healthy balanced social life. Women just won’t let themselves get close to me.
I know society tells us that guys just want to get laid all the time and not establish meaningful connections, but I actually very rarely meet that type of guy.
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A DOM is the ultimate male, i.e. Dominic Toretto. Obviously! 
This gives me hope. Thank you so much for clarifying this.
I think that depends on the guy and what part of life he’s in, and same with woman and where she’s at.
If you’re late 20’s early 30’s a lot of the women might have the preconceived notion that guy who looks like [this] is/acts like [this].
With this being a guy who just wants to hit and run.
Because that’s who they’ve been dealing with for the last 10 or 12 years.
This is actually pretty fascinating and new to me. I’ve actually tried to get friendzoned so hard, and I have failed every time. I kinda believe it’s almost impossible now, as you suggest.
I tried to friendzone so hard, one got to the point that the woman who agreed to grab drinks with me actually thought I was gay. I even did the weak kiss on the cheek when we parted ways lol. Next hangout she invited me over to her place, and I didn’t have sex with her. We got to a third date, and I told her I wanted to wait to have sex until we’ve established a deeper connection. She freaked out, starting saying how rejected she felt, told me she really really liked me and CLEARLY I just don’t feel the same, etc. And literally all I said, was that I really like her too and would like to wait a few more dates hahaha.
Another time I asked a girl to unleash all her guy problems on me and I’ll share all my issues with girls and she should come over and we’ll bake together and gossip. She STILL was asking me to send shirtless selfies and perceived the evening as a date. And then text me the next couple days that we can’t do it again, because she didn’t “feel a spark.” LMAO! I never heard from her again.
I just genuinely don’t know what to do with this shit! I’m not trying to get married tomorrow or rush into shit, but I’d love to have my first healthy relationship that’s not entirely hinged on sex and lust.
Come to think of it, it explains my experience with online dating too, since that ONLY showcases your face really. I’ve experimented with putting up pics of guys who would fall into the STM/AVG category and got more matches in 1 week than I did with my own pictures in 3 months. And whenever I’ve gone to women for feedback on my profile, they all say the same thing–oh yeah, you look like a player so I’d swipe left. They even say, it’s not your choice of pictures…it’s your face. 
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You have been cursed with DOM physiology and LTM/AVG psychology. I don’t know how to fix it.
Perhaps you could put on some fluff to soften your jawline in order to make yourself less threatening.
Interesting anecdotes, by the way. They seem to fit my hypothesis.
Ha, to be fair, I chose the DOM physiology haha. 10+ years of hard work in the gym and the kitchen. My whole family, immediate and extended, tend to be on the fluffier side. I never had a square jaw until I was 25.
This is like an intriguing chicken or the egg. Do DOM guys have a DOM psychology and reinforce DOM stereotypes for women? Or do DOM guys develop DOM psychology BECAUSE of a lifetime of women treating them that way?
Maybe there’s more dudes like this than you’d think. After so many years of trying to experiment with this shit, I’m honestly pretty close to the point of saying fuck it and going all in and just fucking around instead of hunting genuine connections.
It’s still new to me, because all my high school and college years I definitely had a round face and average build. This is when my identity and psychology probably developed the most. The last five years or so, women (complete strangers) being complete dicks to me and actually singling me out of my group of friends was entirely different.
I would say it’s both. Most men will be prolific fornicators given the opportunity, and women make it easy for them because that is the phenotype they prefer for flings. DOM psychology is an outcome of abundance of sexual choice as well as a product of DOM physiology.
You should try becoming fluffy. I’m nearly 30 and obese (not by choice, I’m crippled and have debilitating chronic pain), yet I have had subtle cues of interest from multiple women in the past six months. I highly doubt it’s because they want a fling, given my repulsive body. They are probably looking for a boyfriend.
The whole post was funny, but this in particular.
I think you should tell prospective women exactly what you’ve said in here. OTOH, I’ve always thought that (for women) there’s a sweet spot that stops short of real beauty, which is distracting to coworkers, friends, etc, and intimidating to prospective dates. Better to be a 7 or 8 unless your dream is New York or Hollywood.
I guess for men it would be the hyper-masculine thing.
Yeah, that explains why I haven’t developed a DOM psychology then. I do not FEEL as though I have an abundance of sexual choice. 99% of my experience is 1. I get a girls numbers 2. Follow up to set up a date and she ghosts. From what you’re saying, it’s likely she was probably wanting me to just take her home instead of getting her number. Psychologically, I still perceive sex as something you work up to after several dates. Not something I can just attain with someone I just met.
Another potential strategy is dating high-T women. I don’t know if you’re familiar with Jocko Willink, but he’s a guy with an absurdly DOM face. His wife is on the higher-T side, but still beautiful.
If you went down this path, you could spawn some robust specimens.
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Damn, come to think of it my last two LTR’s were about 1.5 and 3 years. In both, when they started I had let my weight drift up to maybe 20+lb over my current. And that was when I met both of them too. During both relationships I decided to cut back down to single digit bodyfat, and sure enough both relationships ended right around that time too. In both, they became emotionally distant pretty rapidly, even though sex was still very prevalent until the very end.
(Sometimes even after :/) Coincidence?!
Coincidence? Not at all, seems like I have quite a valid hypothesis.
DOM’s who want LTR’s would benefit from becoming fluffy, whereas AVG/LTM males would benefit from gaining muscle for flings (or LTR’s).
Yeah, I’m happy with how I look though. I think I can pursue other means of “softening” my disposition though. Also, come to think of it (having lot of epiphanies thinking through a new lens), a few years ago I got some trendy looking frames since I was tired of wearing contacts all the time. Sure enough, people were treating me nicer whenever I had glasses on. I get a million Clark Kent comments, but that’s better than Superman! I think dressing like a big dork could help too. Laid into it for Halloween even! 
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Glasses are a definitely a good idea. I get a lot more looks when I am wearing my shades, but with glasses I look like a dork.
Well, thanks alot, man! I have taken alot away from this thread.
I don’t know, I love seeing my husband in his glasses. Just so smart-sexy.
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Yea, you have to put in effort. If I can’t resolve my chronic pain I’ll probably be incelibate for life, because its made me unemployable and I can’t lift. Right now I have zero muscle mass, so if I try to lose weight I will just look pear-shaped.
That’s worth a shot. I’ve never actually laid it out there like that with a woman I was dating before, because this is all a newer revelation for me. But moving forward, I think I like this idea.
That’s the thing, I think of myself as a 7. I know I have a strong jaw, but I’m not Henry Cavill or Henry Golding in the looks department haha.