Starting Back From Anxiety Attacks

Training
522

[quote]Jinx Me wrote:
Dan, indigestion, gas, reflux and heartburn are often signs of LOW stomach acid, not excess acid. Have you tried taking betaine with meals?

Sorry I’ve been MIA - been busy as always. But you keep rockin out.
[/quote]

Jinx,
No, haven’t tried that yet. Would I be able to pick that up at most pharmacies? The doctor gave me some Protonix and it seems to be helping so far, as I haven’t had the nauseating feeling all day and/or reflux feeling.

I should get a better grasp on things after this GI test on Tuesday.

I’ve felt like a slacker since I’ve missed working out for the past 3 days but I’m going to get back at it tomorrow.

Thanks as always for the advice.

523

Hey everyone,
Just got back from the gym (yeah!) and had a good workout. Felt good to get back in and throw some weights around after taking the last 3 days off due to my stomach issues. Speaking of which, tomorrow morning I go in for my upper GI test. The pills my doctor gave me have really been helping, so I’m hopeful that the issues are clearing themselves up.

I also get the complete results of my inner ear tests tomorrow, so it’s going to be a busy day, as I also have to find time to get some work done. I’ll post the results as soon as I find out.

Here’s the stats from today’s workout:

  1. Jump Shrugs, 8x3: 145
  2. Max. Hold Squat, 1x120%: 265
  3. Max. Reps Squat, 1 set: 225x3
  4. Max. Hold BB Decline, 1x120%: 265
  5. Max. Reps BB Decline, 1 set: 225x4
    6A. Overhead Squat, 3x3: 55
    6B. Chin-ups, 3x3: BW + 27.5
    7A. 1-arm DB Rows, 3x3: 85
    7B. DB Tricep Overhead Ext., 3x3: 75
    8A. Hand Walks, 3x4: BW
    8B. Cleans, 3x4: skipped
  6. Reverse Wrist Curls, 3x5: 55

Probably will end up taking tomorrow off, but if I have time, I’ll get in a home boxing workout.

Take care,
Dan

524

Hey everyone,
Well, had my upper GI test yesterday. Initial reports are good, as they didn’t raise any red flags or indicate any serious problems while I was there and I haven’t heard anything today, so I’m assuming everything checked out fine.

Been doing some research on my condition and trying to come up with some good natural remedies to this problem. From what I’ve read (and been told by some on here), I’m actually not producing enough acid and that’s why I’m having the digestive problems and feeling queasy/full for longer periods of time. The medication Provotnix is working, but that’s more people with excess acid, so I don’t know how that would work long-term.

Looking into buying some betaine (sp?) and some other acid-inducing foods to see if that helps.

Of course, can’t go anywhere for a while as CO is being nailed by a major storm. Thankfully I was able to get home since I live close to work, but the roads are terrible. My wife is staying with a friend tonight b/c it was too dangerous for her to try and drive home. She was mad b/c they decided to send everyone home early, after she had driven 45 minutes to get to work. She should’ve just stayed home if that was the case. Hopefully by tomorrow evening the roads will be driveable…of course that’s if the roads are cleared, which NEVER happens around here.

Going to get in a home boxing workout in a little bit and tomorrow will do some conditioning stuff at home, since I won’t be making it to the gym.

Oh, and my balance tests all came back normal. Like I said, have some excess fluid, but reducing salt intake will clear that up quickly.

Take care,
Dan

525

Hey Dan - the betaine may be appropriate, but it’s hard to know if you do have low stomach acid. It’s a possible cause, and very common. A good quality probiotic may be worth considering.

526

[quote]Jinx Me wrote:
Hey Dan - the betaine may be appropriate, but it’s hard to know if you do have low stomach acid. It’s a possible cause, and very common. A good quality probiotic may be worth considering. [/quote]

True. It’s really kind of trial-and-error right now to see what really works. I’m also looking into the probiotic route.

527

DJ and everyone else who has shared their stories…
I have s l o w l y read through this amazing thread and felt less alone for the first time in a long time…

I’m sure a surge of inspiration will lead me to share mine, but in the meantime I have gained such incredible support from just reading and need to say THANK YOU to everyone who put it all out there…

I suffer from hypermaladaptive perfectionism which led to severe burn out and subsequent panic attacks. I thought it was just asthma gone wild, but it was anxiety and it only got worse, until I finally flew back home for medical help mid-semester and mid-season (the best field hockey season of my career) and found myself in a severe situational drpression.

I am gradually working toward treating myself better, as I have some very self-abusive behaviours and have gone the more “alternative” route with a TCM practitioner, 5-HTP and other supps over medication and am seeing a great therapist.

I really hope to contribute something meaningful here, as this thread is simply remarkable.

DJwlfpack - I hope your GI issues are resolved soon!
Thank you for being so honest and open about your experiences. You cannot imagine the scope of hope you bring to other people. You certainly are doing your part.

Phew… good read.

528

[quote]proxy wrote:
DJ and everyone else who has shared their stories…
I have s l o w l y read through this amazing thread and felt less alone for the first time in a long time…

I’m sure a surge of inspiration will lead me to share mine, but in the meantime I have gained such incredible support from just reading and need to say THANK YOU to everyone who put it all out there…

I suffer from hypermaladaptive perfectionism which led to severe burn out and subsequent panic attacks. I thought it was just asthma gone wild, but it was anxiety and it only got worse, until I finally flew back home for medical help mid-semester and mid-season (the best field hockey season of my career) and found myself in a severe situational drpression.

I am gradually working toward treating myself better, as I have some very self-abusive behaviours and have gone the more “alternative” route with a TCM practitioner, 5-HTP and other supps over medication and am seeing a great therapist.

I really hope to contribute something meaningful here, as this thread is simply remarkable.

DJwlfpack - I hope your GI issues are resolved soon!
Thank you for being so honest and open about your experiences. You cannot imagine the scope of hope you bring to other people. You certainly are doing your part.

Phew… good read.[/quote]

Proxy,
Thanks for the kind words. It’s really amazing to see what this thread has transformed into. It’s really become a sense of strength for me, and I know it’s helped other people realize that if nothing else, they aren’t alone in their problems with anxiety.

Thanks for giving us an insight into your background…whenever you feel like giving more details, I’ll be here to listen, either in the thread or a PM if you’re more comfortable.

I’m hopeful my GI stuff clears up soon, too. Seems to run in the family. I just found out my dad had bad stomach issues around my age, and my younger sister has problems too.

I need to read your thread…field hockey is cool!

Take care,
Dan

529

Hey Dan and all,

Well I too recently joined T-Nation due to this thread (and others as I am very into training), so first off thanks everyone for sharing your stories.
Personally, I dont suffer from panic attacks as such, but I have recently had a rather humbling experience with trying to come of my anti depression meds. I have been taking 20mg of Citalopram for a couple of years now with great results. No side effects to speak of and it really allowed me to lead a normal life to a large extent. In fact alot of things such as libido etc are far better while on the meds.
My biggest problem, that they helped to deal with, is that when i wasnt taking them I have very persistant, habitual negative thoughts which tend to seek out things wrong in my life and dwell excessively on them. If there really isnt anything that bad then they manufacture something! it really feels as if i become possessed.
Anyway after years of little trouble, i have always felt the desire to be off the medication so i decided to try to slowly ween myself off over the course of a month or so. I had already been taking 10mg, half my dosage for quite a while without any problems so I figured that it wouldnt be a problem to continue this pattern until I was off completely.
How wrong I was. I found out that it doesnt work like that AT ALL, well not for me anyway. After slowly tapering off over the course, almost without noticing at first the negative feedback loop re-established itself just a little, gradually growing without me even realising until last week i realised that my days had become miserable, anxiety filled trials that just further contributed to the spiral.
After talking to me sister (the condition runs in the family - siter, uncle, aunt) who has successfully been off the meds for years, she gave me some pretty good advice. What she pointed out was that it took her at least a year of gradual tapering dosages, at each stage stopping for an extended period of time to make sure that there was no relapse, and to monitor progress more effectively.
So anyway, to cut a long story short last week I decided to go back to my originl dosage of 20mg for awhile to get back to myself again and then start on my long journey of rediscovery once more.
The funny thing is that even though I am still up and down a little now I am happy i have gone through this experience. Next time there will be no rush.
So to Dan and the rest good luck with your journey, i know how hard it is, and with this type of condition it definately takes one to know one. And knowing one means you are not alone!
G

530

[quote]uppercut wrote:
Hey Dan and all,

Well I too recently joined T-Nation due to this thread (and others as I am very into training), so first off thanks everyone for sharing your stories.
Personally, I dont suffer from panic attacks as such, but I have recently had a rather humbling experience with trying to come of my anti depression meds. I have been taking 20mg of Citalopram for a couple of years now with great results. No side effects to speak of and it really allowed me to lead a normal life to a large extent. In fact alot of things such as libido etc are far better while on the meds.

My biggest problem, that they helped to deal with, is that when i wasnt taking them I have very persistant, habitual negative thoughts which tend to seek out things wrong in my life and dwell excessively on them. If there really isnt anything that bad then they manufacture something! it really feels as if i become possessed.

Anyway after years of little trouble, i have always felt the desire to be off the medication so i decided to try to slowly ween myself off over the course of a month or so. I had already been taking 10mg, half my dosage for quite a while without any problems so I figured that it wouldnt be a problem to continue this pattern until I was off completely.
How wrong I was. I found out that it doesnt work like that AT ALL, well not for me anyway. After slowly tapering off over the course, almost without noticing at first the negative feedback loop re-established itself just a little, gradually growing without me even realising until last week i realised that my days had become miserable, anxiety filled trials that just further contributed to the spiral.

After talking to me sister (the condition runs in the family - siter, uncle, aunt) who has successfully been off the meds for years, she gave me some pretty good advice. What she pointed out was that it took her at least a year of gradual tapering dosages, at each stage stopping for an extended period of time to make sure that there was no relapse, and to monitor progress more effectively.
So anyway, to cut a long story short last week I decided to go back to my originl dosage of 20mg for awhile to get back to myself again and then start on my long journey of rediscovery once more.

The funny thing is that even though I am still up and down a little now I am happy i have gone through this experience. Next time there will be no rush.

So to Dan and the rest good luck with your journey, i know how hard it is, and with this type of condition it definately takes one to know one. And knowing one means you are not alone!
G[/quote]

Uppercut,
Thanks so much for sharing your story. Best of luck as you try again to taper off your medication. I tried once unsuccessfully to taper off my meds and made the mistake of rushing the process. After the holidays I’m going to try again, but this time at a much slower pace.

531

Hey everyone,
Just got a call from my doctor with the results from my upper GI. Everything checked out NORMAL!! I’m really excited with the news, as there was a slight bit of worry in me over the past few days. The test did reveal that I do indeed have a bit of reflux, but not much. So, the plan is to stick with the Provotnix (which seems to be working) for another week, then go a couple of days without meds and see how I feel. If the reflux feeling is still there, then I can look to other forms of either over-the-counter meds or some natural methods.

A great way to start my day. This takes a lot of weight off my shoulders.

I hope to be able to have use of my car in a couple of hours, as my wife is coming home from her friend’s house, and they are bringing a shovel along with them so we can dig my car out. I plan on going to the gym, but we’ll see how much the shoveling takes out of me.

Take care,
Dan

532

I just finished reading through your thread and it was a great read. Thank you for sharing it with us.

I wanted to drop in and tell you that…I lifted today! yay me. I started a new workout log “Lifting for Sheer Pleasure”. Stop in, I posted my lifting today.

Take Care
Michelle

533

[quote]Bittabit wrote:
I just finished reading through your thread and it was a great read. Thank you for sharing it with us.

I wanted to drop in and tell you that…I lifted today! yay me. I started a new workout log “Lifting for Sheer Pleasure”. Stop in, I posted my lifting today.

Take Care
Michelle[/quote]

Great news, Michelle!

534

Hey everyone,
Hope you all had a great Christmas. Mine was definitely enjoyable, especially seeing the surprised look on my wife’s face when she opened up her new iPod Nano (green). She had no idea she was getting that and what’s great about that is that now she’s super jazzed about getting back in the gym and exercising. We’re going today as soon as I get out of work, which will hopefully be pretty soon.

As for me, I got some new Nintendo DS games, a few DVDs and books and some new clothes.

Health-wise I’ve been doing good. Anxiety is under control and my stomach GI issues are getting better on a daily basis.

Take care,
Dan

535

Today’s workout:

  1. Jump Shrugs, 8x3: 165
  2. Max. Hold Squat, 1x120%: 265
  3. Max. Reps Squat, 1 set: 235x3
  4. Max. Hold BB Decline, 1x120%: 265
  5. Max. Reps BB Decline, 1 set: 215x4
    6A. Overhead Squat, 3x3: 65
    6B. Chin-ups, 3x3: BW + 30
    7A. 1-arm DB Rows, 3x3: 85
    7B. DB Tricep Overhead Ext., 3x3: 75
    8A. Hand Walks, 3x4: BW
    8B. Cleans, 3x4: skipped
  6. Reverse Wrist Curls, 3x5: 60
536

Hey everyone,
Thankfully, this last storm wasn’t as bad as last week’s…we still got around a foot, though and I was snowed in 1/2 day on Thursday and all day on Friday.

Managed to dig my car out this morning and the wife and I went to the gym. I was going to go to Muay Thai but class was cancelled due to the weather and the fact that with the holidays classes are usually smaller anyway, so the bad conditions were likely to leave it very thin in class.

I did my second HD workout and here’s the stats. Oh, and let me say that the gym was super crowded, but thankfully, I was able to grab a power rack.

1A. Jump Box Squats, 5x3: BW
1B. Clap Push-ups, 5x3: BW
2. Max. Reps Sumo Deadlift from pins, 1x2-3: 305
3A. Pistols, 3x3: BW
3B. Push Press, 3x3: 115, 125, 135
4. Dips, 3x3: BW + 50
5A. External Rotations, 2x12: 10
5B. Reverse Wrist Curls, 2x12: 50

Did some sprints afterwards and then finished off with some stretching.

Been having some weird pains in my rib cage area recently…think it’s related to all the shoveling I’ve been doing. It doesn’t hurt, just kind of a pins and needles thing…perhpas a nerve is pinched somewhere or something.

Going to watch UFC 66 tonight…very excited to see Griffin-Jardine and Liddell-Ortiz will be a spectacle. I’ll be rooting for Ortiz, but I won’t be surprised if he gets KO’d.

Taking tomorrow off but will be back in the gym on Monday.

Take care,
Dan

537

Hey y’all,
Happy 2007! Unfortunately, I’m not in the best of moods today. Anxiety-wise I’m fine but I’m bumming because I didn’t get a job offer that I was hoping to get from a newspaper back in New York. It was a good-sized paper and close to my family (2.5 hours), but they hired someone already. The fact that I currently live in Colorado really puts me in a bind in trying to land a job back east b/c papers are spending less money than ever before and aren’t willing to interview out-of-state candidates.

On the good side, I went to my new dentist today and she was great compared to the last place. She said my teeth were great and that aside from needing my wisdom teeth removed, I wouldn’t need any other work done, which is in stark contrast to my last dentist, who was only concerned with milking me dry by telling me I needed procedures that weren’t necessary. Thankfully I have a brain and wasn’t gullible enough to fall for it.

Going to do a home Muay Thai workout here in a bit. That should help relieve some sadness from the job situation.

Stomach is doing better. Haven’t had to take any pills for my reflux and my diet’s been normal.

Take care,
Dan

538

Hey, have you ever tried Emotional Freedom Technique? It’s kinda out there and weird, but it has done wonders for anxiety for me me in the past year. Just another tool to have the the box.

539

Don’t you hate when you do something and immediately know you’ve made a bad decision?

Well, that happened to me today when I got home from work. Sitting on my doorstep was a package. Now, for a little background. My sister had informed me that she had bought me and my wife’s Christmas present over the Internet, and that when it was shipped to us, we’d have a good idea of what it was. Due to the winter storms, mail has been delayed by a week or more.

So, naturally, I assumed the package was from my sister, especially when I saw the date it was shipped (12/22) and where it was shipped from (UFC store; my wife is a fan so it is plausible). I didn’t bother to look to see who it was shipped too. I should have, because I forgot that my wife had mentioned not to open any packages shipped to her name in the next few weeks b/c she had purchased something for me for my birthday in Feb.

That thought didn’t cross my mind until after I opened the package and saw just a single item in the box: a red hooded UFC sweatshirt. Very nice! But, once I noticed that’s all there was, I knew I was in trouble.

Now my wife’s pissed (and rightfully so) because I ruined her big surprise. She’s debating on returning it and getting something else, or just letting me keep it and me having to deal with the fact that I won’t be getting much else from her for my birthday.

This really upset me because the last thing I wanted to do was ruin a good surprise. It wasn’t something I did on purpose, but it happened and there’s no going back from that.

Hopefully, she’ll cool down and forgive me sooner rather than later. I did assemble our 2 new bookcases and put away the remainder of our Christmas decorations today, so hopefully that’s going to help smooth some of the rough edges out.

Was going to train today but this situation threw a big wrench in those plans. I’ll get back at it tomorrow.

Any suggestions as to what else I should do to help this situation?

Take care,
Dan

540

Wow. This was my story… Very, very similar. In 2004 (I was 31) I had a near death experience. After I “recovered”, I started having frequent panic attacks / anxiety and depression, landing in the hospital several times.

The second or third time I went to the hospital I thought I had a heart attack WHILE working out. As you can imagine, I didn’t go back to the gym for a long time. Like, a year? As working out is a really big part of my life, this really sucked.

And the lack of exercise made things progressively worse, until I ended up afraid to leave the house at all… Worried that I might pass out on the street.

I got a bit of counsilling. Here in Manitoba, Canada, there is A.D.A.M., Anxiety Disorder Assosiation of Manitoba, which is where I BEGAN to get help.

As much as possible, I stayed away from meds. Just as a personal choice. I now do not take any medication.

I came back to the gym slowly, I found I had atrophied significantly, so I started slow. My heartrate seemed unnaturally fast, and then I realized my cardio conditioning was shot, so I focused on cardio first, weights second, every workout.

Now I’m back, all out. I workout 5-6 days a week, with my old all out intensity. Muscle memory didn’t seem to be there for me, I had to gain every bit back a piece at a time… But then, maybe it just seemed that way.

At one point (when i wasn’t working out, due to anxiety) the doc’s did a stress test for my heart… And it came back normal, in the middle of average, maybe low average, for a guy my age. This is when I realized I wasn’t in good shape. All that time focusing on just muscle. Except for the one that really counts.

Now the heart and cardio system is still my main focus, because of this, I’m more vascular than I ever was before… And my recovery times between sets is better, and I think I get better pumps too.

To sum up:

Dude, I feel your pain. I wish you the best - I hope you make it back. Remember man, your heart is supposed to do beat fast when you exercise. It really is.

My experience taught me to take better care of my health, emotionally and physically. I’m not cured, but i’d say I’m 90% better, and I learn more techniques constantly on how to control my anxiety.

My Advice:

Well, not that anybody really listens to the advice of some stranger… But then, you posted this - so:

  1. talk out your problems as much as you can. with different counsillers, doctors, friends, etc. let it out.

  2. laugh often… laugh loud.

That’s all I got. I wish you well dude. Good luck.

541

Hey everyone,
Just got back from the gym and had a great workout. Got in my Hammer Down: Endurance workout today and made it through the entire circuit with no rest in 20 minutes! I was wiped afterwards, but still managed to run/jog a .5 mile afterwards.

Tomorrow I’ll get in the second HD: Strength workout and then Saturday I go back to Muay Thai.

Update on the ruined birthday surprise: the wife forgave me, but she’s not happy with the sweatshirt. The quality isn’t what she expected, especially considering how much she paid. So, she’s debating on returning it or not. Might not be a bad thing if she does, then she can re-order some new stuff off the site (T-shirts, hats, DVDs) and it would be a surprise.

Take care,
Dan