Do men have any authority in the creation of their offspring beyond busting a nut?
Can he decide anything for the outcome of his sperm once he’s ejaculated?
Legally? No. He has no say in what happens. Even if he wore a condom, she can use it to impregnate herself and make him pay child support.
I’m all for holding both men and women responsible, but responsibility cannot be equal if authority is not also equal.
Responsibility requires Authority.
They think?
I guess the inmates are running the asylum.
Ironically, I think religion actually hurts this cause. It’s those who are more religious that don’t believe in birth control and/or terminating a pregnancy, even once they’ve discerned the father isn’t worth keeping around.
Technically Jesus was born to a single mom and Joseph got cucked by God.
You won the internet for me today.
Idk, I might have to think on it more, but to me there’s a pretty simple explanation for this–divorce and single parenthood have been gradually but dramatically destigmatized over the last 50 years or so. Women who keep a kid today a few generations ago would’ve been pressured by their parents to put it up for adoption and keep it hush hush for fear of societal shame on their family name.
But also, discerning a man would be a good father before he’s actually had any experience raising kids is a herculean task and is honestly mostly a gamble even with men with an impeccable track record. You never truly know until a man is actually in that role. And there’s nothing else to even approximate how he’d be as a father. Maybe seeing he’s a good pet owner or great with nieces/nephews? But even that is like 5% reliable lol.
I mean… this isn’t exactly a secret… I think I’ve actually started threads asking about research things 
She has been doing that for years. 
I appreciate how insightful your response is.
Do you think that social programs perhaps incentivize single motherhood?
Maybe court-ordered child support?
IMO, I think this isn’t so much of a “what if” question, but more so “how much impact do these things have?”
In a vacuum this could be true, but it’s also important to define cause and effect. Your example here is fairly extreme, and while I agree that a woman sneaking sperm is a wrinkle, it’s not that common in practice. I generally don’t let outliers define overall outcome.
What does happen more often is that the man in some way abandons the situation. Whether he doesn’t even know and moves on after sex or he does and deserts the situation it leaves the woman in a position of taking up his slack, not taking authority.
And, speaking of discernment, is it a two way street that people deserve what they get if they read another’s intent wrong? Or would it be absurd to suggest that because you didn’t read a woman’s mind and she shoved your condom up her pussy after you left that you deserve to be a father?
Objectively asking, I don’t give two shits about feminism or the automated talk tracks rebutting it.
In general, I have a hard time believing single motherhood could ever be incentivized. That’s not my attempt at any political commentary either. I just think its a shit sandwich for everyone involved, so I tend to dismiss any arguments that claim it can be incentivized. It’s literally stretching the responsibility of two adults onto one. Like hey, you have to do 48 hr worth of life in 24 hr and make sure you raise another human being(s) properly!
I keep getting chosen for shampoo testing and lame stuff like that.
I want to be one of the rats they test ketamine or mushrooms on. Something cool. Not lethal dosing of the latest anti-dandruff formula.
I generally agree with your views, at least to a degree, but will say there are some shit people who essentially farm children for a welfare plug. They don’t cram 48 hours in to 24 because they don’t parent.
The adoption/foster system is abused this way too.
Oof. That’s heartbreaking to think about.
Ever had your significant other leave on a business trip for a few days? Or came back to see them after you’ve been on one?
This comment is on the money.
I will bookmark your comment in my memory and revisit when my fiancé and I have kids.
I just want to clarify that it was your comment I was referring to. And agreeing with
If you’re thrown into single-parent mode, the most important thing you need is to already know what your partner does so you can ramp it up when they’re gone, and plan to give them a break when you get back. Changing diapers, meals, school times, laundry, house cleaning - both parents should be able to do that at the drop of a hat.
It helps to have extended family, a nanny, and a flexable work schedule, but that’s rare.
Also, congratulations on your engagement.
When talking about incentives, it’s important to consider what the baseline is. Traditionally, most cultures have very much disincentivized single motherhood. The results of that were often harsh and certainly hurt children who bore no fault for their situations. But it also created a certain incentive structure.
Of note, traditional systems that disincentivized single motherhood also usually tried to force the fathers to contribute to the extent that their identities were known. Women were more identifiable as single parents and thus more likely to be targeted by these systems. But they didn’t give men a pass when they could be found.
So I wouldn’t say that we have incentivized single motherhood. We just de-disincentivized it.
