Courtesy of Rick Mercer from “This Hour Has 22 Minutes” CBC Television:
On behalf of Canadians everywhere I’d like to offer an apology to the United States of America. We haven’t been getting along very well recently and for that, I am truly sorry.
I’m sorry we called George Bush a moron. He is a moron but, it wasn’t nice of us to point it out. If it’s any consolation, the fact that he’s a moron shouldn’t reflect poorly on the people of America. After all it’s not like you actually elected him.
I’m sorry about our softwood lumber. Just because we have more trees than you doesn’t give us the right to sell you lumber that’s cheaper and better than your own.
I’m sorry we beat you in Olympic hockey. In our defense I guess our excuse would be that our team was much, much, much, much better than yours.
I’m sorry we burnt down your White House during the war of 1812. I notice you’ve rebuilt it! It’s Very Nice.
I’m sorry about your beer. I know we had nothing to do with your beer but, we Feel your Pain.
I’m sorry about our waffling on Iraq. I mean, when you’re going up against a crazed dictator, you wanna have your friends by your side. I realize it took more than two years before you guys pitched in against Hitler, but that was different. Everyone knew he had weapons.
And finally on behalf of all Canadians, I’m sorry that we’re constantly apologizing for things in a passive-aggressive way which is really a thinly veiled criticism. I sincerely hope that you’re not upset over this.
We’ve seen what you do to countries you get upset with.
If you are so disgusted with the United States, get the fuck off of this web site and find one in your own neck of the woods, so we don’t have to constantly look at your whining, sniveling, “oh poor me!” piece of shit posts!
If you just get kick out of pissing people off, well kick back and enjoy this one for awhile, because although I don’t even know you, I’d like to bitch-slap you upside the head…
takes a deep breath, tucks his shirt back in, smoothes down his hair (oh, that’s right, he doesn’t have any), and shakes his head in pity…
And the new tampon tucker gerbil jammer award goes to…This fuckin guy!!!(YEAAH) I wont say all cafucks are idiots because i’ve met people like groove that i think rock. But you sir suck. Wonder what would happen if canada (notice lower case letters) tried any of that burnin shit down today?? OOHH thats right, about 2 weeks later there would be a grand opening for the WORLDS LARGEST SMOLDERING WASTELAND. Hell i’d buy tickets for the whole family for that one. I’m sure you’ll have something smart to say when you get done fucking your mom…“Ay??”
Not to mention a canadian invasion would fail once it hit around the tip of texas as your horribly hard to look at pasty skin would burst into flames from the direct sunlight.
P.S Dont bother making comments about how canada would do in a war since we know you fuckers wont fight.
Groove if your reading this, your alright, that post just hit me the wrong way.
Now then. I tend to sit out on this Canaidan/American shit because, quite frankly, it always degrades into an idiotic spat.
I’m sure this thread soon will.
But I just wanted to ask this:
Why is it the Canadians keep jerking themselves off to the war of 1812? If anything, it just illustrates how they’ve weakened (at least militarily), because ‘they’ certainly couldn’t do it now.
Anyway, I just had to get that out. I can’t believe I responded to this crap.
Sorry Say but the war of 1812 was fought against the british, not the Canadians. Now how about coming up with something truthful. Your anti-american posts are not winning you any friends over here. Maybe you should stop posting if you can’t contribute somehow.
Being Canadian, I can honestly say that you’re behavior is embarressing me. Not because of your beliefs, but because the way you’re handling the situation.
There are many positive and productive ways to support the anti-war campaign. What you do on this forum isn’t one of them. You simply come off as a bitter incoherent fool who resorts to weak college shock tactics to get your message across. Honestly, you’re not helping your cause in any way, nor do you represent your countrymen well.
Why don’t we all agree to just hate SAY, cause I took an informal poll up here and it turns out that:
A: We did not elect him spokeperson
And
B: Suspicions abound that SAY is actually Manuel Noriega and he’s still pissed about being blasted out of his house by Twisted Sisters “I Wanna Rock”, so his opinions may or may not be the rantings of a semi-lucid lunatic.
To recap:
SAY = Bad/Hate
CANUCKS = Good
“The Liberals talk about a stable government but we don’t know how bad the stable is going to smell”
Arghhhhhhhhhhhh I hate these fucking america VS Canada threads. They are a usless waste of time. I agree with everyone that say is an idiot. I think both Canadians and Americans alike can agree on this one…but… I am very very patriotic and I don;t like anyone bashing Canada. BFA, thank you for the nice comments about me personally but I disagree with you about one thing, your texas comments. I don;t know if you have ever been to Canada or not but it gets very warm up here in the summer. It gets up to 40 degrees celsius(not sure of the conversion to farebheit but it is damn hot). I always laugh when I see Americans from the southern states who bring skis and winter clothes during the summer. I have a tan year round so not all Canadians have pasty skin
Ike, you know you’re one of my favourites on the forum but your comment holds little value. Canada as a whole doesn;t make a big deal out of 1812, only say does, and believe me he doesn;t represent Canada, despite what he thinks. Think about what you said and think about what would happen if ANYONE tried anything like against any country today. Lets say that the US decided to bomb the Parliament buildings or buckingham palace or any other political building of a major country. Shit would hit the fan. It doesn;t matter that the US has the strongest army, revenge would be had. It doesn’t matter how many soldiers you have because they can;t stop a nuke. So it doesn;t show that Canada has a weak army(although admittedly they do) because they aren;t burining down the white house. Besides there is no reason to burn down the white house today… except for maybe Deisel23 hehehe. Again I offer up a trade…say for Deisel23, and we can bothe do whatever we want with them.
I implore my fellow forumites to ignore say when he posts and not to stoop to his level and bash Canadians in response to him. Groove
I hate to see this whole USA/Canadian spat start up again and I refuse to lump the rest of our canuck brothers in with guys like Say, but I’ve come to a conclusion.
Guys like Say, Lumberjack, and the rest of their posse definitely suffer from a combination of a severe inferiority complex and classic penis envy.
Now, I’ll try to do the right thing and not get sucked into replying to stupid posts like his anymore.
say,
It is a measure of your inferiority complex that you cannot be simply Pro-Canadian. Why aren’t you just simply proud of your country? No, it has to be always phrased within an Anti-American context.
Let’s get a few things straight. Nearly every American spends about one minute per year thinking about Canada. That one minute is broken up into several differing topics. We wonder for about 18 seconds if quebec is going to break away. We wonder if they are going to call themselves, “Little-france.” Can you imagine being proud of being a hybrid frenchmen? Another 22 seconds is used up wondering why there are Canadien players on our United States National Hockey team. Why does Brett Hull choose to play for his adopted nation? We spend about 10 seconds per year wondering why so many prominent Canadiens, “William Shatner, Michael J. Fox, Peter Jennings, etc…” choose to live and vote in America. Our final 10 seconds is wondering why Canadiens boo our national anthem. We wonder at their lack of class.
I hope you go ahead and develop a national identity of your own. If you do or don’t, is mostly irrelevant to us. You’ll only get about one minute.
This Rick Mercer is the same one who has a COMEDY SHOW on the CBC where he goes up to americans & tells them that Canada has just got its 1st volunteer fire dept or something. (remember??) If you guys can’t take a joke, at least stop dichotomizing every situation & call it “anti-american” or other such bullshit. The War of 1812 took place when some cowardly americans found out that Britain was preoccupied with their war with the French & thought they’d take advantage of it. The people who were born & raised in Upper (present-day Southern Ontario) & Lower (present-day southern Quebec) Canada & the 6 Nations natives fought off the annexationists. So they were fighing for Canada although Canada hadn’t become a nation officially. & as for my national pride, look a page of 2 past this one & see Canada’s Grand Canyon. Nowhere did I write anything like “…so piss on your stupid grand canyon american scum”
I thought about flaming Say but really, he’s just too easy of a target. Even for me.
So I have a different idea. No one on this board seems to like him (hardly surprising). And he seems to get off on posting stuff that has little or no value other than simply stirring things up. So I say (heh heh, get it?):
Say, it doesn’t seem like much of a joke when you insist on continually posting topics like this. Maybe you’re trying to be funny, but thiongs don’t nessicarily get funnier with incessant repitition. I’m Canadian. Fine. Good. My views are not the same as yours, althought I AM proud to be Canadian. Please, give it a rest, I hate to be lumped into the same group that you are portraying as anti-americans.
but I disagree with you about one thing, your texas comments. I don;t know if you have ever been to Canada or not but it gets very warm up here in the summer. It gets up to 40 degrees celsius(not sure of the conversion to farebheit but it is damn hot). I always laugh when I see Americans from the southern states who bring skis and winter clothes during the summer. I have a tan year round so not all Canadians have pasty skin