This may be very selfish/inconsiderate of me, but people who do a set, and then walk off down the gym for their ‘rest’, making me think the machine is now free for use and then come back just as I’m geared up to use it wind me up something chronic. Some bloke did that the other day and it was so difficult to tell when he’d finished. I was hopping up and down everytime he wandered away.
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Ditto. I work out at work (a hotel) and there was this guy who alternated between the French Press machine, the Leg Press, and some other leg machine. I thought he was done and did a set on the French Press, then realized he was waiting for it. So we kind of alternated. While he was on the other machines, I was on the French Press and I “rested” while he was on it.
[quote]mrjones1914 wrote:
I’m going to call myself the “Get Outta Dodge” guy - the guy at the gym who doesn’t have a lot of time to socialize or loiter around; I just want to get a good workout in and “get the heck outta Dodge”. That’s why we go to the gym to begin with, right?
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I fit that profile I think I always seem angry, or not very talkative when in reality I just want to work out and go home and eat.
Stinky coffee man- this old man comes in smelling like four days of body funk and drinking a coffee while going from machine to machine doing absolutely no real work…
BAD FORM SMELLY GUY- this guy is a rarity; he has the work ethic of Arnold but the weight lifting intelligence of a rock. He is there every day working/sweating his ass off. His form is super fucked with every exercise, on bench-press his back is so far off the bench and range of motion is next to none. BTW he is about 6ft and 180lbs and only benching 180. He tries to curl 75lbs db with this super back bending swing motion that looks like it really hurts, and his rope pull downs are done with the same motion believe it or not. Pull ups are about one inch range of motion… AND HE STINKS LIKE ROTTEN THROW UP AND SOUR MILK!! BUT, he is there every day and if he got his shit right he could be a beast!
Full body Dips- only did dips. Once got a training session and told the trainer he only wanted to do dips because they worked the entire body
Dirty Bastard- short fat guy that always wore his hands free headset. He cussed so much he was asked to leave several times. He also made it his only exercise to check out girls on treadmills. Had only 3 teeth.
Hulk Hogan- extremely tanned, balding, blonde guy. Always stretched where he could watch the girls in the yoga class. Once hit on a transvestite (I’m not making this up)
Asian Cougar- Woman with ridiculous implants that came in at night and hit on every guy that had a pulse.
Buttmunch- dozens of people that came in whose accounts were months past due. Always claimed it was the first they had heard of it and tried to be pissed off. I always let them in because I only got paid $5 an hour.
I returned to training in a commercial gym just about two months ago. Already I’ve had one guy try to talk to me during a set and another guy ask me a question. I wasn’t in a conversation with these guys at the time, they came up mid set and started talking.
A few weeks ago I had to listen to one dude tell another how NO Explode was burning his ass. This conversation lasted a solid ten minutes and was loud.
In a gym long ago, there was an old guy everyone referred to as “Chester”. He spent a lot of time hanging out over by the child care.
The annoying little bitch that said I know nothing about training because Im not qualified.Even though she says i should become a trainer because i give good advice?!I dont want to go into a dead end carreer thanks very much.
Do I have to say anymore I think we have had personal trainers that like to pretend theyre highly qualified even though you can do a level 2 crash course in 9 days.
“The birdiebuilder”: Does a couples of cycles and train only upper body = looks like a bird: big chest/shoulders/arms and no legs with stick calves.
“Protein Man” : drink several protein shakes before, during and aftet, goes to the locker room to his 5 lbs container to refill between sets.
“Ring boy” Has a decent built with low bf, but he’s all show (can’t do the iron cross). Made a strange face when one of the best girl outlifted him in the deadlift (she was warming up!): he left the bar on the platform and just took off to do cardio to return an half-hour later.
Homeless guy who comes into gym to use the tanning beds. Because you gotta look good when you live on the street.
I shit you not, he came into our gym last night.
“Hacksaw” Jim Duggan- Its really him, sans the 2x4…hogs the adjustable bench for like 90mins at a time doing a bunch of really odd looking shoulder exercises w/15 lb DBs
[quote]dianab wrote:
Homeless guy who comes into gym to use the tanning beds. Because you gotta look good when you live on the street.
I shit you not, he came into our gym last night.[/quote]
Oh yeah, had the homeless guy at an old gym, too. He paid his 12 bucks a month and parked his wreck of a camper out front. He used the gym to shower, watch tv and talk with the racquet ball players who were out front by the tv. Pretty smart move actually.
[quote]BBriere wrote:
Don’t forget these very important characters:
Crossfit guy- can be seen doing a zillion kip pull ups or poor form clean and presses for an hour straight. Is trying to get in shape to fit into a spandex suit for the remake of Tron.
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Just wanted to say that was some funny shit. Laughed my azz off for the “remake of Tron”!
The Tap Out Kid - The skinny 18 yr old with the sleeveless tap out shirt and the mohawk. Loves to look at his abs during every set of the Nitro Ab machine, I am waiting for someone to call his bluff and ask him to roll.
The old guy in the locker - This guy loves to be naked with his old balls and strike up conversations with me.
The “you gotta do more reps” guy - This is the guy who sees me going heavy on some back exercises and tells me to use less weight TO GET RIPPED, shut up you fat fuck!
The wife beater tank top guy - He thinks he looks jacked in it, but he really just looks fat and feels every and I mean every exercise can be performed on the smith machine.
