…and every one of those women were searching for a man to make decisions for them. Hell the main protagonist basically picked the alpha males of alpha males, Mr Big, to make her decisions for her…
they were all miserable until they met men to make their decisions for them.
I focused on this show for my dissertation back at my alma mater, Misogyny U.!!
I’ve actually never seen it! The only thing I have less tolerance for than women is a TV show about them.
Who ever thought that was a good idea anyways?
Let me tell you, it was an exercise in self-discipline. One can only bleach their eyes so many times in a day, nahmean
Yeah, I knowwhatchersayin.
Or the fact that women in ancient Norse society were in charge of the entire household and finances.
Why not just, “enjoys and cares about being active”?
Maybe the best answer to this is “Yes, and no.” Does it have to be the gym specifically? If yes, will any gym training serve? Or does it have to be more oriented to lifting max weights? Where’s your boundary with regards to the requirement?
I understand where you are coming from. But, maybe just having an interest in pushing your body in some way is a broader net that still suffices. How about a person that does not go to the gym, but that does say… martial arts or gymnastics? What quality is it, really, that you are searching for?
I had to confront this very thing in myself recently. I was dating an individual and we were/are very suitable for one another in many respects. We share similar political views, ideas about child-rearing, had an easy time communicating about our dynamic with one another without it feeling unsafe, it was easy to open up to one another about whatever luggage we carried with us into the relationship, and we always had something to talk about and we could piggy-back off of one another’s interests. She’s studying to be a psychiatrist and we’d discuss behavioral patterns from a technological context a lot but really, there were no ends to what we’d talk about.
But, she had zero interest in moving about her body in any way or form. She had other passions, and out of all the people I’ve found attractive as of yet they’ve all been deeply passionate about at least one thing — so, that’d be something on my list if I was making one. However, having zero interest in any kind of physical exercise is something that I find directly unattractive, especially when there’s nagging physical pain as a direct consequence of being too sedentary.
Had she had any physical activity she enjoyed, not necessarily the gym, nor an activity I myself have to share having an interest in, I would maybe have developed more interest in her :shrug:
Anyway. I obviously like the gym too, but I don’t imagine that my next partner must share this interest. Nor share an equal interest in nutrition. I just want to share my existence with someone that wants their life to be composed of similar components to the make-up I want in my own life. For me, that’s balancing work, exercise, and life. To me, exercise is not optional. It’s mandatory. And having a passion of some sort. Whether or not that is their work, art, exercise, music, whatever. So, really, it’s a matter of compatibility, I believe. There has to be enough overlap in the abstract, more than in the concrete. What I mean is, I wouldn’t exclude a cyclist just because they don’t also do barbell squats.
For him, “just stay active” and care about not turning into a fat slob. The main reason for this point is that I want someone who will understand that I won’t skip workouts for social events, “indulge” in happy hours or stay up late just to hang out
I’m not being a dud here. I understand some don’t act correctly with their families. I’m not getting the irony though. I don’t believe the example set by Sex and the City was good and I’m not convinced women who live like those characters are all so satisfied or happy. Some yes. For others I think it’s contrived.
I was originally just goofing on a former poster that formed the opinions he shared here from sitcoms, reddit, and porn.
Then Polo jumped in and it just became a goof off session.
Its true though that I’ve never seen that show. But I have met a number of single and/or divorced self sustaining women that were a lot happier with the choice of how and with whom they spend their time than in a traditional marriage.
It’s like they were actually doing OK for themselves.
I was just making fun of Sex and the City - had nothing to do with what you said.
With that being said, The part I quoted above I tend to agree with, but I don’t think much modern television programming sets a good example for anything - but I don’t really think that’s the point of television or entertainment in general (which, like most things, ought to be consumed in moderation).
I don’t really have much time to extrapolate further even though I’d like to…
It’s not just that though. There’s the whole other side.
What do you make of this phenomenon wherein guys are literally getting ready to go ballistic if they don’t get what they want(which is a whole other autonomous human being) , but a lot of women are seemingly happy, willing and able to build decent lives either independently or with onl casual contact?
It looks pretty wonky to me.
Number 1 is arbitrary. You can have deep intellectual conversations about black holes, Shakespeare, political theory, computer programming, medical ethics, or any number of other classically “intellectual” things. However, consider you can probably also have deep, intellectual conversations about football playcalling, DnD character creation, social dynamics in “The Bachelor,” or any number of classically “not intellectual” things. And for most people’s lives, the second group is not less meaningful than the first.
What you really probably mean by number 1 is that you want someone who likes deep discussions on some of the same subjects that you like deep discussions. That’s pretty reasonable, but it might be helpful to think of it in those terms.
Number 2 is arbitrary. Everyone procrastinates. Sometimes, it’s called prioritization. Doing everything immediately is not helpful or smart. All the same, you probably want someone who has their stuff together, and that’s perfectly reasonable.
Number 3 is fine, although if you are very extreme in your diet and regimen, you should find someone that is similar.
Number 4 is on a spectrum. If distance means you don’t touch each other ever, you’re going to limit yourself to a very small number of men who are going to accept that. Guys fall on a spectrum as to how much physical contact they want. But 0 is pretty uncommon.
Number 5 is fine as long as you mean it in a humble, “I realize I have flaws,” and not a bitchy, “I refuse to improve myself so deal with it” type of way.
Correct
I should have put it that way
idk about 0, just not like what my impression of the “typical guy” is
I definitely have plenty of them 
They certainly should be punished if they harm another person.
Being angry and depressed about being womanless? That’s understandable.
But encouraging others to be angry and depressed about it too? That’s dangerous. It’s understandable to have anger and disappointment as an initial reaction, but digging in on those feelings instead of making steps to change them only results in more rejections, more anger, more disappointment, and it’s a vicious cycle.
Was typing up a response that said basically this.
Reinforcing those feelings of disappointment and anger are detrimental and exacerbate the actual issue…
Anger, unexplored, is useless.
@flappinit @polo77j
Right. Being depressed is guaranteed to not attract women. Counseling and sound reasoning from Professionals, friends and family helps.
I can only speak for myself. If a spouse who goes to the gym is a big deal for you, then who am I to say you’re wrong?
Personally, I love it when my girl goes the gym. Ideally, she’d always be in good shape. But there have been rough periods in her life when she didn’t have drive to train and she gained some weight. There have also been times when she sacrificed training time to focus on other hobbies (like art). I’d feel like a jerk if I held that against her (And this is coming from someone who’s primarily a raging asshole). Training is a big part of my life, but my girl isn’t me.
True, I have no good alternative for marriage that would work for society. My main issue with marriage has to do with how many guys get screwed over from the divorce aspect (so it’s more of an issue with the courts and legal system).
And the Bodybuilding Bible was a great contribution to this site. Threads like that kept me on the right track as a teen, so thanks for that!
With respect to the comment about women being less vocal about being single (Can’t remember if it was @SkyzykS or @polo77j) could that just be a gender make up thing?
I was having a conversation with my mother recently about the death of a partner. Anecdotally it appears that women struggle less after the death of a long term partner than men do. My mother was a palliative care nurse for years and observed this many times. It seems related to social connections and interactions. In relationships, women generally drive to families social life. Perhaps the same is true when you are single. Perhaps women develop more connections that make them feel a bit less isolated.