[quote]Chushin wrote:
You 2 could have your own TV show!
But then Orion would visit Japan, and his whole routine would fall apart.[/quote]
Yeah, because I probably would not need it.
Japan has made you soft…
[quote]Chushin wrote:
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]Chushin wrote:
You 2 could have your own TV show!
But then Orion would visit Japan, and his whole routine would fall apart.[/quote]
Yeah, because I probably would not need it.
Japan has made you soft…
[/quote]
Indeed.
That’s the goal: as hard as need be, as soft as is possible.[/quote]
I agree.
But around these here parts, you know…
[quote]Chushin wrote:
You 2 could have your own TV show!
But then Orion would visit Japan, and his whole routine would fall apart.[/quote]
So, I keep meaning to talk about this and not getting to it (I think?), but the ex-husband spent from January of this year until late August in Taiwan. He met a Taiwanese woman at a trade show. They saw each other a couple of times and were skyping I guess, and then he went over to work for the company she was with. I guess he went right as I was starting the most recent new job and I didn’t have much time for online.
It was a disaster. He reported to me at about the three month mark that it had been weeks since he’d touched her and by the end he was desperate to get away.
This after telling a family member, who said “you didn’t hear this from me, but” that she was the perfect woman. “She’ll do anything I want her to.” I don’t know what that means, but the lines I drew were things like other men. ANYWAY. Wherever you go, there you are. So I was here having joyous, uninhibited sex and happy stir-fry while he was there being angry and unhappy.
A cautionary tale for you, orion.
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
There are men like me, who had depressed wives who did stupid, intolerable stuff or were lazy and fat and didn’t want to change. There are men like my best friend, whose wives cheated or became substance abusers.
Good guys who for one reason or another left their marriages. I’m looking for them. I believe, based on my limited experience, that they’re also looking for me.
[/quote]
Dang. I need to find a slightly younger, nerdier version of you in the real world. That probably doesn’t exist yet. I rode the “separate from your cheating spouse ride” a lot sooner than most of my peers. I’ll probably just have to wait a few years for some of the currently taken girls to realize their same mistake.
[quote]Chushin wrote:
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]Chushin wrote:
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]Chushin wrote:
You 2 could have your own TV show!
But then Orion would visit Japan, and his whole routine would fall apart.[/quote]
Yeah, because I probably would not need it.
Japan has made you soft…
[/quote]
Indeed.
That’s the goal: as hard as need be, as soft as is possible.[/quote]
I agree.
But around these here parts, you know…[/quote]
Ok.
But maybe at least consider a visit to Japan or some other Asian country. It might be good for your perspective and mental health.[/quote]
You mean being a somewhat decent guy and being appreciated for it might actually be good for me?
I would wager that this would be good for a lot of guys, wherever they are?
[quote]csulli wrote:
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
There are men like me, who had depressed wives who did stupid, intolerable stuff or were lazy and fat and didn’t want to change. There are men like my best friend, whose wives cheated or became substance abusers.
Good guys who for one reason or another left their marriages. I’m looking for them. I believe, based on my limited experience, that they’re also looking for me.
[/quote]
Dang. I need to find a slightly younger, nerdier version of you in the real world. That probably doesn’t exist yet. I rode the “separate from your cheating spouse ride” a lot sooner than most of my peers. I’ll probably just have to wait a few years for some of the currently taken girls to realize their same mistake.[/quote]
A nerdier version of me? I don’t think they exist! Unless you mean in the video game sense rather than the classic dork sense, which base I have completely covered. lol
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
A nerdier version of me? I don’t think they exist! Unless you mean in the video game sense rather than the classic dork sense, which base I have completely covered. lol[/quote]
Yea 
You’re a “classic nerd” which is just to say basically that you’re an intellectual. Jenn, now there’s a nerd! I mean that in the most endearing way possible Spock.
If we had tag lines here I might use that. “Classic nerd.” lol
Your back is incredible, btw.
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
If we had tag lines here I might use that. “Classic nerd.” lol
Your back is incredible, btw.[/quote]
He has the same “Nazi haircut” as me.
Apparently, a clean shaven neck is very Aryan.
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
If we had tag lines here I might use that. “Classic nerd.” lol
Your back is incredible, btw.[/quote]
Oh my, thanks!
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
[quote]harrypotter wrote:
And then we have the shaming articles asking why guys prefer porn, PUA and games when it comes down to commitment. So women dont need men? Sounds like somebody got blasted in the face by one too many athletes during her prime.[/quote]
You’re icky. Probably the ickiest poster on TNation, and that’s saying a lot.
That’s why women don’t like you, not because of the feminist movement.[/quote]
Ah, the creep move in combination with “I bet you never get laid”…
Did I mention that we have a list?
Seriously, we do. [/quote]
This:
It’s nasty! It’s nasty and hostile and awful! Do you suggest that this is a man deserving of a nice woman? He IS creepy! Do you defend these statements he’s made as honorable?[/quote]
No, but that was just aggressive and vulgar, not creepy.
There are other posters at the moment who I would consider to be creepy.
Also HP, knew Emilies post history even somewhat you would know that her HS football team has very, very, very, likely never run a train on her.
Thats just misplaced anger…[/quote]
Going back to this - what you should both understand is that my HS football team wouldn’t even have noticed me. At that time I was an awkward nearsighted girl. People who knew me knew I was fun, and some boys thought I was pretty, but that wouldn’t have been the jock types. They didn’t even see me. They were chasing the hot, flirty girls.
The problem with your system is that it rejects the very girls it claims don’t exist. You want to chase the 16-year-olds with manicures and clothes from Victoria’s Secret who chase football players, that’s fine. But speaking for the sixteen-year-old girls who had their noses buried in the 1200-page Shogun, I will tell you that you’re not of interest to us after you get tired of chasing shallow ass and want to have babies with someone nice who likes adventure stories with a lot of smutty parts.
It’s a two way street. You don’t seem to understand that we’re out there. We just don’t want the boys who wanted those girls, who wanted hotter boys. ALL of you are/were shallow, and all of you are becoming disenchanted/bitter. Yet you continue to chase that girl, from the sounds of it.
We library girls can do better.[/quote]
No you cant.
I had read every James Clavell novel by then and then some.
Plus, with my nice guy ways you would have rejected me regardless.
[/quote]
Why would I have? I don’t think so. I went from a nice guy long term boyfriend (two of them actually, moving back and forth between parents) to a nice guy husband (meh, sort of) (he was less beta than the boys I dated) (the beta-est of whom I almost married).
My ex-boyfriend, the one I can barely keep myself from running back to, has a master’s degree in what is possibly THE dweebiest discipline on earth. I’ve been over this: my height or a little shorter, broke, swears less than me, has Ben Franklin glasses, etc. No one would ever look at him and think “bad boy” or “alpha.” But I found him absolutely intoxicating, EVEN THOUGH he always did the dishes. But not because he had to to get sex, just because I generally cooked and that was his fair trade. Plus we wanted to get it out of the way so we could go have sex. I put away food while he did and made the next day’s coffee. When we went camping I made sandwiches and breakfast while he loaded the truck. No one treated anyone like shit, until the stress and his desire to move home became an issue.
Maybe your nice guy ways were offensive in some way, or struck girls as being oily, I don’t know. But I feel that all of the guys I’ve been close to have been varying blends of nice guys and awful, like most people. All have been very generous with me, to the degree they were able. But I’m very generous and affectionate, too. It’s nice to be nice. (Did you know that?)
[/quote]
God, did you never meet a guy who just did not “get it”?
Could you please explain to me why suddenly guys who did not “get it” started to pile up?
[/quote]
I don’t know. Who were you chasing? I think that’s where your answer lie. Because if you were clean and reasonably good looking and you said to me at 16 that you loved James Clavell, my face would have lit with delight.
But I don’t think you would have said that to me, because “hot” is not my superpower. Kind is. Smart, maybe. Interested, curious, funny. But you’d have to bother talking to me to know any of that. At some point I became a little hot, maybe, in my late teens, early 20s. But that didn’t make me want to have sex with shallow, uncaring men. lol [/quote]
Emily, I would have tried to befriend you so as to get to know you better and build intimacy and whatnot so that you would see I was different and whatnot…
Doomed from the start…
The emergency stop for the female libido…
I would have been such a special friend until you would have found someone to give it to you good, then I would have been discarded.
Given that this was the late 80s, early 90s, what was in the air back then?
Who sold me that rotten fruit?
[/quote]
God you’re cynical. You and Emily are overanalyzing this. There are PLENTY of quality, single people out there that are looking for some semblance of a relationship. After all, you guys are single, right?
Orion, referring to women as “cock hoppers”, “cum buckets”, “sluts”, and plethora of other derogatory terms only reinforces your current position - bitter and single. You can exclaim that you just don’t care but I call your bluff.
You need to put yourself out there, let down your guard, be positive, and be free of expectations. Just see what happens…
No, nobody NEEDS another person but it sure can be nice being with another person. 
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
If we had tag lines here I might use that. “Classic nerd.” lol
Your back is incredible, btw.[/quote]
How about “nerd chic”? 
[quote]WhiteSturgeon wrote:
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
If we had tag lines here I might use that. “Classic nerd.” lol
Your back is incredible, btw.[/quote]
How about “nerd chic”? :D[/quote]
“Awkward dork.”
Edit: although I’m only awkward around men I perceive as having romantic interest, or who are interesting to me in that way. Otherwise I’m pretty chill.
[quote]Chushin wrote:
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]Chushin wrote:
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]Chushin wrote:
You 2 could have your own TV show!
But then Orion would visit Japan, and his whole routine would fall apart.[/quote]
Yeah, because I probably would not need it.
Japan has made you soft…
[/quote]
Indeed.
That’s the goal: as hard as need be, as soft as is possible.[/quote]
I agree.
But around these here parts, you know…[/quote]
Ok.
But maybe at least consider a visit to Japan or some other Asian country. It might be good for your perspective and mental health.[/quote]
Did you see my post above yours, wherein I suggested that men with issues carry those issues, even to Asia?
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
[quote]WhiteSturgeon wrote:
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
If we had tag lines here I might use that. “Classic nerd.” lol
Your back is incredible, btw.[/quote]
How about “nerd chic”? :D[/quote]
“Awkward dork.”
Edit: although I’m only awkward around men I perceive as having romantic interest, or who are interesting to me in that way. Otherwise I’m pretty chill.[/quote]
I have always found awkwardness in a chick endearing. Problem is when it makes me laugh, a lot of times this is perceived as me laughing at them from whatever pedestal of cool they then assume I have propped myself on just get pissed. Actually, most of the time it is just making me smile and drawing a laugh because I found it cute.
[quote]WhiteSturgeon wrote:
[quote]pat wrote:
[quote]WhiteSturgeon wrote:
[quote]pat wrote:
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
[quote]orion wrote:
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
[quote]harrypotter wrote:
And then we have the shaming articles asking why guys prefer porn, PUA and games when it comes down to commitment. So women dont need men? Sounds like somebody got blasted in the face by one too many athletes during her prime.[/quote]
You’re icky. Probably the ickiest poster on TNation, and that’s saying a lot.
That’s why women don’t like you, not because of the feminist movement.[/quote]
Ah, the creep move in combination with “I bet you never get laid”…
Did I mention that we have a list?
Seriously, we do. [/quote]
Feminazis have a list, too, but, being a reasonable human being, I dispute that the qualities they shriek about in men are true of more than a few of them. I would suggest that the feminazis should be nicer if they want nicer men.[/quote]
Women do not want nice men. The term ‘Nice guys finish last’ is not just a saying. I am living proof.[/quote]
Awe, that isn’t true! 
I happen to be married to a really, really, really nice guy! Perhaps, you are just interested in girls that don’t appreciate nice guys. [/quote]
I have actually never met a woman who likes nice guys. The scenario breaks down like this. Woman sits around kitchen drinking wine with other women, bitching about men, bitching about how mean and selfish they are, etc. Next thing you know said woman is on cloud 9 having met the love of her life who happens to be the most narcissistic pig on the face of the Earth. the meaner the cocksucker is, the more attached said woman becomes.
Then finally the break-up. Woopie! She’s free from that asshole. Swears she’ll never do it again. Finally she meets a nice guy. Treats her well, brings her flowers, etc.
Now if she is a good enlightened woman, she must constantly remind herself that while, not much of a challenge and kind of boring, this is a good man and she better damn well stick with him. If she is average, he is boring and not a challenge and will probably cheat and then move on. The guy could be good looking, have a good job, and do fun and interesting things with her, but the relationship is not a challenge. While it appeals to the nesting nature of a woman, it does not appeal to her sexual nature.
Now this isn’t a comment on you, this is a scenario I have scene played out, over and over and over again. It’s actually backed by some science, though I am loathed to go look for it right now.
The nesting behaviour of the female prefers and needs to nice guy. The sexual nature of the woman pretty much likes to be dominated and fucked hard like a proper woman.
In America we value sex waaaaaaaaay over nesting family behaviour. Since we value the sexual relationship as a society, to a vast degree over the family oriented, ‘Good guy’ behaviour, the nice guy often loses and continues to.
No it’s not all women. Yes, there are lots of different people and lots of different relationships, but this sex > nurture situation plays out a lot in this country. It just does.[/quote]
Are you saying that you don’t think a man can possess both sex appeal and nurture appeal? [/quote]
No. I am saying that women have to psychological and physiological forces at work when it comes to pair bonding. One seeks the perceived physical strength and overall evolutionary advantage with regards to procreation. And the ability to provide a loving and caring environment for the offspring. It actually has little to do with the man. A man may have both properties, but it’s the perception of the women as to whether the man has the better procreative property vs. the better nurturing quality. If a man is perceived as a better nurturer, he tends to lose in the dating game. If the woman perceives that a man could impregnate a tree with a solid stare, he gets the game.
And this perception is the result of behavior more than looks.
Ideally a woman needs two men. One to make the offspring and one to care for it. Even if you are not going after the family, these underlying forces are at work. It’s not a woman’s fault per se, it’s the way they are wired. Much in the same way men are wired to increase procreative success by spreading the seed as much as possible.
So women are typically not attracted to ‘nice guys’ because they are perceived to be sexually weak. He may be the ‘love master’, but if she perceives a nurturer, in our heavily sexualized society, he is less attractive, less desirable.
And a man a woman does not need to change, is a man she does not need to waste her time on.
[quote]pat wrote:
And a man a woman does not need to change, is a man she does not need to waste her time on.[/quote]
pat you’re a beast