[quote]pat wrote:
[quote]EmilyQ wrote:
Also (was thinking about this as I woke this morning) I think some of the glacial pace of things has more to do with timing and my extrication from the last relationship than in being old fashioned. When we picked things back up I was broken up with the boyfriend, but there were still all sorts of lingering uncertainties, so I wasn’t willing to offer more than “friends,” which i made clear was up to him to either tolerate or not. He knew my breakup was recent.
So we were hanging out, hiking, doing friends stuff, and then at some point the breakup with the ex became solid and the new guy and I were still just hanging out and exchanging emails throughout the work day and so on, and while he was making fairly regular flirty or overtly sexual comments in email, nothing was happening in person. Like, NOTHING. And then it finally occurred to me that he was waiting for me to make the move, since I’d set the parameters. So, okay. But it took me a couple of hanging out times to figure out about kissing someone else, because I’d never had to do that part before, and people don’t necessarily stay still so you can work your way around to it. Awkwardness ensued. So then I finally managed to get the thing done and he left town.
And now here we are. It really is not that I need to date someone for months or years before going beyond kissing. lol[/quote]
Yeah, just take your time and do what makes you happy. I wouldn’t go licking carpet just because some dude was mean. Take your time, enjoy life and if you don’t want to be hooked up, than don’t be. Go have fun. Plenty of time for relationships. Relationships are a pain in the ass, so don’t have one unless that is what you want. Otherwise go do something that makes you happy. It’s seems clear that your not really into this new one. Otherwise you’d be on the proverbial cloud 9, and you don’t have to settle. If you settle, just to be in a relationship, you will never really be happy. Be happy first, if some dude comes along great if not who cares?
I took 2+ years off from women when I was younger. It was the funnest, most carefree, enjoyable time of my life. I had a great time and I never had anyone nagging me… If you ain’t into the poor bastard, cut him loose. Fuck it, enjoy life. Some dude will come and mow you down soon enough.
All us good men are taken anyway. ;)[/quote]
What is licking carpet? I’m not sure I know what that means. Unless it’s my lesbianism connected to the mean guy? I guess that must be it, now that I think about it. Okay, good advice. Thank you.
I think I do like the new guy a lot. Cloud Nine is easy for me, I think I may spend too much time there. So I’m trying to be more mindful. And I worry about getting hurt, because I’m having a hard time predicting/reading things with this one and that makes me uncomfortable. I’m used to my usual sort of guy and this is a different sort, but that’s what I’m looking for, so we’ll see over time. No rush.
